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Kevin wishes he could say he ran from Evermore in some big heroic, adrenaline filled moment of bravery that hit him in the next breath post the incident, that he is certain he finally saw the endless comparison competitions and forceful push-to-the-point-of-injury to be the best for what it truly was: abuse.
It’s not his reality in the present moment though.
Well, it might be.
But it’s probably not. He’s not certain about a lot of things at the moment.
He is certain his left hand was smashed by Riko sometime this morning. With the amount of force used, the intent was likely to destroy the tendons. Such a move could make Kevin lose his connection to his dominant hand’s touch, to his Seer abilities, to a known point of envy: his mother.
But after that, his memories go fuzzy and blank. He is certain he screamed, cried even, in agony. He is certain cutting remarks were made to him, as they often are when he falters in anyway. He is certain more happened but he just doesn’t have a clue how he got here, to this train station specifically.
His hand is unevenly wrapped in gauze and ace bandage. There is a backpack on his back. A large coat on his shoulders. But he hasn’t the faintest idea of how he got from that crystal clear incident to this moment.
Of course instead of consciously getting himself away from danger, he blacked out as he made his way here. Clearly the concept of escaping was so unfathomable he couldn’t even stay present and had to mentally check himself out of the driver's seat. Good to discover he can accomplish such a feat even without alcohol.
Master did like to remind Kevin he was a coward and this is likely why.
The only thing he is certain of is he didn’t get here on his own. And the only reason he’s even in the driver’s seat again is because someone jostled his shoulder (of his good hand), throwing him off balance and down onto the seat of a bench. The pain from the accidental check grounds him in the present, bringing his attention to his throbbing hand.
He stares down at it, trying to focus on where the faint pink of blood will likely start to peek through on the edges of the bandages. He imagines the blood slowly spreading since he assumes they didn’t do much more than bandage him up before… here. The sun is still shining bright through the station windows so it’s only been a couple of hours which doesn't sound like enough time for the hospital visit warranted by the amount of blood he saw.
He stares with a sort of objective detachment, replaying the moment over and over in his mind, trying to understand how he got there and now here and what the fuck he is supposed to do here. He should probably get to a hospital. Riko’s going to be furious if Kevin’s hand gets a nasty infection or he bleeds out, dying from this wound and preventing him from continuing to witness the rise of Riko. He’s not even here to take Kevin to the right hospitals with the right connections that don’t ask the right questions.
Wait, Riko’s not here.
He’s not here and Kevin is alone. Here. In a train station. By himself. Riko is going to be furious - wait, he probably is furious and holy shit. He’s probably going to do worse: he’s going to kill Kevin. Kevin’s going to die because he left Riko’s side some how, some way, through means he doesn’t even fucking know.
Or even worse, Riko will destroy the other hand and entirely cut off Kevin’s main connections to his abilities (and his mom) because he hasn’t managed to actually escape anywhere. Losing his left hand is bad enough, but if he lost his right hand, he’s not sure if his brain could process his magic without his hands as outlets. And without his magic, who would he even be?
He’d be as good as a pretty corpse. Which is also what he is the longer he stays away from Riko’s side.
He has to get back. He has to get back and grovel. He didn’t mean to do this. He doesn't even know what this is. The notion of escaping Evermore and Riko was always a dream, a joke even, whispered where no malicious ears could hear or misinterpret. It was never thought of with substance, that it would ever happen because it shouldn’t. And Kevin knew that, understood it deeply, for who even is he without Riko?
Just one half of a set with so much to learn.
Kevin didn’t mean to disobey. He has never been alone before, he knows his place is next to Riko. Kevin would never try to upstage Riko, they are a team, a duo, a matching set. Kevin knows Riko doesn’t like when Kevin shows off excessively, pulling the attention away from the talents and hard work Riko has put into his gift, and knows how important that recognition is to him. Kevin hasn't even begun to train his powers to the extent that Riko has. Kevin can only see a snapshot of the future, an image frozen in his mind, for a whole minute when he’s at full magical energy capacity but for mere seconds on lower energy days. But Riko can see a fifteen second loop of the future, can cycle through it five times on his good days and at least twice on a strenuous day. So how could Kevin ever expect his Sight to be the favored one?
He never knew the Master would deem bad and good visions to be more fruitful than just bad ones, no matter how detailed or long they are.
Kevin really doesn’t want to die. He doesn’t want his abilities to short circuit his brain due to not having a channel, and most of all, he definitely doesn’t want to lose his magic entirely. He just wants to go back to eighteen hours earlier, before the little demonstration, before the break, before coming here.
Here where Kevin can’t even fucking breath the air is so heavy it feels suffocating. Maybe it is suffocating him because he feels compressed on all sides by it, making him small by pushing him down, down, down. But none of the air is going in, in, in. The more he tries to focus on breathing, the heavier it seems, more elusive. A pressure builds behind his eyes and he feels faint. Distantly he wonders if Riko sent an elemental air wielder in his place, like the Butcher of Baltimore, to finish Kevin off.
Desperately, he pleads with higher benevolent beings he doesn’t even believe in to rewind the past twelve hours to before all this or even just an hour ago when he could fucking breath.
“Hey, you want some help calming down?” The voice comes to the side of Kevin and he startles at the unexpected intrusion to his thoughts. Whatever breath he had remaining catches in his throat but he just can’t seem to get it out. His eyes widen, the panic making him tense and tight. He can feel the sweat dripping down his neck. The voice is soothing and gentle like they’re talking to a spooked animal that might bite.
And well, it’s not far off from reality. He can’t even turn to look at them; he's so tightly wrapped around himself. The voice continues. “I can help, I can influence the mood. It’s my ability.”
Kevin has never really interacted with psychological ability wielders for the Master believes they’re not worth wasting one's time with due to their abilities being too variable to control. And hearing this person's ability, Kevin gets the sentiment. It sounds like bullshit but he's a little more than desperate to get a full breath in before he passes out due to lack of oxygen. What does he even have to lose beyond his dignity if it's a sham?
He gives the smallest of nods, bracing for a physical blow from this stranger because even that sounds like relief at this point. Instead of a touch, the air around him suddenly feels… warmer and like there’s a refreshing breeze in the air despite being indoors. A breeze that flows over him, coaxing his shoulders to drop inch by inch from his ears, slowly unfolding himself from his hunched position. After a long moment, he finds he can raise his head slightly, opening his throat up. His limbs unfreeze and he immediately shoves his hands in the front pocket of his sweatshirt out of sight. It still takes a couple of tries to breath deep, matching the breeze by breathing out as it flows over him and breathing in when the air seems to still.
Once his lungs are fully functioning again, he wonders if this is part of the ability or simply acknowledging he needed to calm down made him relax. Scratch his previous dismissal of the ability. The Master may be a very knowledgeable former seer but his perceptions of psychological abilities discredits them too much. It may sound ridiculous but if successful, it’s a terrifying concept: influencing people’s moods. Kevin’s certain it’s not just the happy, fluffy feelings that can be planted.
He does feel about 70% calmer and 95% more exhausted to his bones. He pushes the scary thoughts of how this could be used against him to the same corner of his mind where he is sure his Riko shaped panic retreated. At least now Kevin’s head is slightly clearer to make some decisions. He rests against the bench fully, head falling back as well, too heavy to hold up at the moment.
“Much better, right?” The voice is still calm but he can hear the grin. He turns his head, realizing the stranger is on his tattooed cheeked side, hopefully unrecognized though. How uncool is it for the Golden Child of Seers to be seen suffocating from his own body’s inability to function properly, in such a public space? Weaknesses should never be revealed. Not to others and especially not in the public eye. He adds it as a mark against himself on his rapidly growing list of misdemeanors today that he is sure Riko will gladly take action to retrain when he catches up to Kevin - no. He can’t think about that now or else he’ll spiral all over again. No, he’s going to focus on the source of his new found interest in psychological abilities while he tries to think through his options.
He keeps his expression as neutral as possible as he takes in their dyed blond curls with dark roots and undercut, light brown eyes, terra cotta brown skin, and a white crooked, toothy grin. Their eyes crinkle from their smile and Kevin knows immediately it’s genuine. It’s endearing in a way that sets him both at ease and on edge. Well, they can’t be pure evil sent by Riko if they just helped a total stranger.
Unless they’re intentionally lulling Kevin into a false sense of security. He needs more information. If this is how he goes, by this Californian surfer errand boy for Riko manipulating Kevin’s emotions to his ultimate demise, it narrows down his future options.
“You didn’t touch me.” Despite his desire to get more information, it’s clear his brain is still trying to understand the nuances of psychological abilities. Also, he sounds terrible. Perhaps worse than he feels with his throat dry and scratchy, voice cracking at the end.
The smile disappears immediately, eyebrows pulling down. “Why would I touch you? I don’t even know your name.”
Kevin just assumed that’s what was necessary, like most gifts that involve other people, touch is usually involved. Especially for him. He really has little background on these sorts of abilities. He tries to shrug at that logic, half raising one shoulder before releasing it with a plop. “I just figured you needed a physical connection to… influence the mood.”
“What?!” Their confusion bleeds into outrage. “This isn’t a date and that is not how my magic works.” They shake their head, jostling their curls in front of their eyes. “Just seemed like you were having a pretty nasty panic attack that didn’t need to go on any longer.”
Panic attack. Huh. So the miserable experience has a name associated with it apparently. He watches the stranger for a long moment, trying to understand their angle, if they really are working for Riko or not. Nothing is forthcoming as their brown eyes watch Kevin back. It is probably unnerving but Kevin’s too exhausted to care. Plus, he’s still alive so he’ll take what he can in the moment.
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” Their entire face lights up as they grin wide. “So, where are you headed?”
For a split second, he thought they were going to ask what set off his panic and he’s immediately relieved they didn’t, fairly certain if he looks in that corner of his mind for too long, he’ll start panic attacking all over again, And he needs to figure out what the hell he’s doing cause he needs to make up his mind: die here by this stranger, return to grovel, or take this chance to escape.
Jean used to whisper in french these sort of escape dreams to Kevin when training and sessions were especially grueling, jokingly trying to coax glimpses of the future from him even though they both knew his powers didn’t work like that. Jean wears a talisman he created that prevents himself from being glimpsed by Seers, secretly protecting himself from Riko and the nightmares his visions could reveal. And while all of Riko and Kevin’s visions are of the future, he just doesn’t know when or how far, and they are set in stone, for the most part -except sometimes, very rarely, for Kevin. And the ability never worked on himself. Probably for the best since it’d make mundane tasks, like taking a shower, really cumbersome and draining.
It’s likely the big coat he’s wearing is one of Jean’s, maybe even one of his magicked ones with a protective spell woven in. It was something he was experimenting and improving for the past year. Kevin realizes with vivid clarity the reason he’s here, alone but safe, is entirely because of Jean. He’s the one that knows how to drive or even order a car ride.
Kevin’s hand throbs at the thought of Jean, hoping he’s fine in Kevin’s absence even though he knows that’s not likely true. He feels a pang of guilt at the fact that he only thought of Jean and his safety now. Even on Riko’s worst goading days with Kevin, he knows it was never as intense as what Jean was forced to endure. His protective magic has always been treated like it belongs to the Master and Riko, not to Jean himself.
Kevin rubs at the wrist of his bandaged hand hidden in his pocket, trying to ease the numbness in his fingers and his heart. As his right thumb rubs over his pulse on his inner left wrist, an image flashes before his eyes: a vision of himself.
Judging from all the plants, he’s standing in a garden of sorts. He’s holding his left hand out. It’s bandaged differently, much more professionally, maybe it’s even in a light cast. There is an older man across from him, toned, tattooed tawny brown arms on display as their hands hover over his outstretched hand, a faint blue light being absorbed by the cast. Their expression is one of concentration, eyebrows and lips slanted down, accenting their sharp jawline. They look intimidating but all Kevin can feel is a sense of ease and relief like he hasn’t felt in a long, long time. It’s so different from the heavy weight he feels in the middle of his chest most mornings when he wakes. He knows immediately this is where he needs to be, where he needs to head. This is who he needs to see, this is who will help him. He frantically scans the vision for any sort of sign of who this stranger is and where they are. Behind them and the tables of plants is a barn, or maybe it’s a store, and painted on the wall are the words: “FOX’S DEN'' with a curled up fox under a bush with the moon high overhead. Underneath the fox are the words: “PALMETTO, SC”.
A clue.
The splitting headache from holding onto his vision for too long starts at the corner of his eyes and he reluctantly lets the image go, confident this is enough to go off of.
He has a direction now, a place to head towards: “Palmetto, South Carolina.”
“Oh cool - I’m heading south myself, looking for a new place, new job. I was originally going to stay here in Baltimore but it’s a little too melancholy for my tastes.”
Honestly, Kevin forgot about the stranger in the excitement of his first self-inflicted vision. He hadn’t actually meant to share where he was going, especially if they’re working for Riko. He grunts his acknowledgement of their words, digging his phone out with his right hand, hoping they’ll get the message their interactions are over and go away if they’re a benign do-gooder.
Kevin just needs to look up this place, find a train that’ll take him there, and… get there… all by himself. A solo trip. The first ever. A day of so many firsts.
What an absolutely terrifying thought.
As he’s opening his phone, dozens of missed calls, texts, and voicemails flood his lock screen. All from the same person: Riko. Kevin briefly remembers why this is a terrible mistake but before he can fall further down that rabbit hole, he unlocks his phone and opens up maps to find a way out of this hole he’s been trapped in and called life for fifteen years.
He’s trying to sort out train schedules when a text pings in, quickly followed by three more: ‘I see your location at the train station. Don’t tell me you're thinking of running away. What a coward. I wouldn’t do that if I were you.’ The stranger lets out a low whistle as the phone starts vibrating to signal an incoming call and Kevin’s breath picks up in speed, staring in locked horror at the device in his hand. He only intentionally ignored Riko’s call once, a scar on his thigh an effective lesson that reminds him to never make that decision again.
They reach over, clicking the ignore call button and picking the phone out of Kevin’s frozen hand to place it on the bench between them. “I don’t think you need to answer that right now.” The warmth and calming breeze returns and he immediately starts to ease up, loosening his jaw. The possibility that they’re working for Riko diminishes significantly because anyone that interacts with him knows his calls are never to be declined.
It might be ten minutes or ten seconds later, Kevin doesn’t even know, before they speak again. “There isn’t a direct train to Palmetto but you could take the train to Columbia then a regional rail out to Palmetto which isn’t terrible. You could get there by nightfall if you catch the train that leaves in fifteen minutes?”
Kevin nods his head slowly, understanding the words but not fully able to parse them. It sounds like a feasible route but what if Riko comes in his surely elevated fury from a declined call? What if he is on the train? What if Kevin doesn’t make it out and simply attempting to escape makes Riko’s punishment even worse for Kevin? What if it isn’t even Riko that reprimands Kevin but the Master? What if this stupid naive dream of escaping is actually what gets him killed? Or worse, gets kept alive but magicless?
He’s never triggered a vision from himself, he has no idea how likely it is to happen or if it’s just wishful thinking. He wants to learn more, about his magic, about his capabilities, to be worthy of the Golden Child of Seers title, to not burn out. He’d like to stick around long enough to find out. But some of his visions don’t come true like the one with Riko breaking that red headed kid’s arms. It is the only vision Kevin ever had of Riko inflicting pain on others and the cold glee in his eyes startled Kevin so bad, he warned the kid’s mom that joining Evermore and their group would only lead to pain and suffering. Kevin never saw them again and Riko’s tattooed their cheeks since, a sign the vision’s timeline has passed. This new vision could be like that, except a best case vision instead of a painful one.
His thoughts are spiraling and he knows it but everything about this scenario is so out of the norm for him that he just malfunctions, trying desperately to latch on any slippery thought instead of frozen and inactive on this bench.
“I could come with you? Be your travel buddy? People always say it’s better to travel in pairs, right?”
Kevin turns with wide eyes at this complete stranger that must be able to feel emotions beyond suggesting them. And they must sense the anxiety he is swimming in, trapped if he stays and potentially trapped if he goes. Visions of himself are probably not set in stone for what good would that be? There is no certainty he’s going to make it to Fox’s Den. But gods he wants to, he wants to feel that lightness again. He wants to try but he’s petrified.
Maybe it’s a little less terrifying with a travel buddy… especially one that can help through his endless freeze response reactions.
“Yeah… yeah.” They tilt their head as if confused by which of the questions he’s answering. He's not sure he can say the words to cement his decision out loud. Instead, he adds on in a quiet voice. “Please.”
They don’t even hesitate. “Absolutely - South Carolina is further south.” They click away at their phone. “Okay, tickets purchased. We probably have about five minutes to load up on snacks before we have to board the train.”
He is absolutely stunned at how easily they have offered to help him, not once but multiple times in this very short span of knowing each other. And knowing each other is generous for their current knowledge level. He has never been this kind to anyone before and likely never will be. He can’t believe they just bought his ticket. He needs to get cash to pay them back and maybe to take out more money so he doesn’t use the joint credit cards. He’s fairly sure they're trackable and he doesn't want Riko to be able to follow so easily.
Kevin doesn’t want anything bad to happen to this stranger for simply helping him. That seems… cruel. If he wasn’t so tired, he'd offer to do a reading, try to see if RIko darkens their future but Kevin would probably pass out at this point before really being able to see anything.
“I need to stop by the ATM too.”
“Well, we better move then.” They stand up, picking a hiking backpack and duffel off the ground. They easily swing the bag on their back, turning to grin at Kevin. “If we’re going to be travel buddies, I would like to know your name at least.”
Kevin stands slowly, limbs and body stiff from all the mental gymnastics of the past however many minutes. He tries to shake feeling into them. His phone lights up from the bench, Riko’s name flashes across the screen. Kevin frowns, picking up the phone. He knows it’s a tether to his path and to the danger. He’s trying something different with a buddy, making an escape like the ones Jean whispered about after all, and he wants as much distance between him and the pain as possible. He tosses the phone into the janitor’s cart that sits idling in the aisle as the janitor sweeps under the benches.
“Kevin.”
“Nice to meet you Kevin.” Their lips become a little crooked as they grin wider. “I’m Jeremy.”
~~~
Getting snacks and on the train involve no fanfare, Jeremy leads the way, making most of the choices with minimal input from Kevin, whose eyes are too busy darting around, keeping a look out for familiar dark hair. Even in his hyper vigilance, he remembers to withdraw as much money as he can from the ATM, stuffing hundreds of dollars in the inner pocket of his coat. And despite their protests, Kevin pays for the snacks since Jeremy covered the train ticket.
He keeps telling himself he'll relax enough to actually interact beyond nods and grunts once they're safely on the train. He doesn’t mind the chatter, their voice is friendly and steady, he just isn’t capable of much more at the moment.
Kevin carefully selects their seats, towards the back of the cart with a seat that has his tattooed cheek facing the window instead of the aisle and his bandaged injured hand safely tucked in his pocket between his body and the train wall. As Jeremy settles into the seat next to him, he struggles to shake the paranoia.
It feels almost too easy. Shouldn't Riko be here by now? He knew Kevin was at the train station. His leg bounces and he continues to quickly glance at everyone that passes through their car, even the ticket collector checking their tickets. Jeremy deflects whatever suspicious look the conductor is giving with a big smile and friendly voice, a bit of a Cali accent meets deep south shining through. They sound just the right side of ridiculous to be endearing. "Oh just a nervous traveler - hasn't slept in days cause of 'em nerves!"
The ticker tsks sadly in response, like the concept is truly a shame, scanning their tickets before moving on. A thought crosses Kevin's mind: what other sort of difficult situations have found Jeremy? Were they able to sweet talk and warm smile their way out of them all? Or would they use their ability?
The conductor’s voice over the loudspeaker dissolves the stray musings. They announce the upcoming stops on the way to their final destination of Savannah, Georgia. When they announce Columbia, South Carolina, Kevin very nearly sighs in relief. He’s not there yet and has hours to go but he’s on his way, following his vision to a stranger in an unfamiliar place that can help him with his hand. Someone that is not Riko nor the Master and somewhere hopefully far enough outside their realm of control.
Kevin holds tightly to that feeling of ease in his vision, trying to trust in his powers, in his mother. Like a mantra, he begins to repeat to himself: He is not making a mistake or else his ability wouldn’t have flared to life at his own touch for the first time. He is heading where he needs to be.
“So, are you gonna try to sleep? We got about 10 hours till Columbia and honestly, you look like you could use it.”
Kevin narrows his eyes into a glare at subtly being told he looks like shit by some California surfer sunshine wannabe. Jeremy doesn’t seem affected in the slightest, their smile becoming even cheekier as if they know the subtle meaning has come across and means it.
It is a good point and his body is getting heavier and heavier with every passing second. He huffs, resting his head back against the seat and closing his eyes. He even tries to stretch out his long legs under the seat in front of him to get more comfortable but his mind continues to race with thoughts of his vision, of Riko, of what exactly happened to get Kevin here, why the fuck this stranger offered to be his travel buddy, and every little thought in between. It still all feels surreal. His leg jiggles to the pace of his thoughts, probably pissing off whoever sits in front of him.
“I can’t.” Kevin grumbles in defeat, his eyes flashing open in frustration.
“I could suggest a mood again.” Jeremy offers plainly as if they already thought it would come to this. Kevin has very, very rarely just used his gift freely on others, expecting nothing in return so what is Jeremy looking for? What could they possibly take from Kevin at this point? What does he even have to offer beyond the couple of hundred of dollars stashed on him? His conventionally attractive good looks and the klout his name brings in the magical community? None of that seems worthwhile or useful to justify luring a stranger into a false sense of security by helping them breath, offering to travel with them, and buying a train ticket.
Worse case, he’ll get robbed while he’s asleep and have to hitchhike or use his credit card to get to Palmetto. Best case, he sleeps. And he’s sure the worst case isn’t even all that bad considering what he remembers of the day he’s had.
Kevin shrugs, trying to act nonchalant despite the excitement his brain is making at the prospect of resting. “Sure.” His voice is hoarse and cracks around that one word, betraying him. Jeremy wordlessly hands him a gatorade from the many beverages and food they bought at the corner mart.
Kevin downs half of his while Jeremy just hums, settling back in their chair. Only when Kevin leans forward to shove the half empty plastic bottle into the cup holder does he begin to feel just how heavy the air is and his body too but the opposite of how the heavy air felt earlier in the train station. It almost feels like a heated weighted blanket is enveloping him. He leans back in his seat again, letting out a deep breath as he welcomes the weight. His eyelids slip close and his thoughts finally slow. He’s passed out and snoring within minutes.
~~~
He doesn’t wake again from his slumber until Jeremy nudges him to alert him their stop is next and he should probably eat something. He hasn’t slept that soundly in over a decade, no dreams, no nightmares. He doesn’t quite know how to thank Jeremy because saying thank you isn’t quite big enough of a sentiment to convey his complete relief and gratitude. He stares at Jeremy for a moment or two, trying to sort out the words in his sleep slow brain but none worthwhile seem to make their way forward so he just nods his head, eating the chicken caesar wrap he picked earlier.
Jeremy seems to understand what Kevin can’t say because their shoulders are relaxed and their smile is small and private, like his own when he’s especially proud of himself.
“Also, I hope the first thing you plan to do in Palmetto is go to a hospital because your hand is not looking good.”
Kevin looks down at his hand, brain slowly coming online and he’s sure his pain receptors will boot up next. He stares dumbly at the lightly pink ace bandage, the blood he envisioned earlier starting to show through now. It probably should’ve been redressed hours ago.
“My abilities, magical or human, don’t extend into the healing and health area.”
“I know.” Kevin nods, mostly to himself, as his vision comes to the front of his mind again. “There’s someone in Palmetto that’ll help me, just have to meet him first.”