Chapter Text
#rules
Chameleon
Hello, everyone. Welcome to the Border Discord Server. Please assimilate to the rules listed below and remember that this is a friendly space for agents to chat.
Please refrain from pinging everyone unless you are given admin or have a good reason to.
No swearing, especially if you are under 18. You will be given a role if you are an Adult or a Child.
No conversations about sex, drugs, or rock’n’roll.
No PDA.
Jin is allowed 13 predictions a day. Any more than that, and he gets muted for an hour and 37 minutes. We are watching you, Yuuichi.
No roleplay fights.
Miwa Shuji
No fighting about politics.
Chameleon
Okay, then
ContraCode
No photos of any animals other than Raijin-maru -Yotaro
RindoRindo
Under all circumstances, Kido does NOT learn about this. No questions asked or answered. He does not.
Chameleon
Head to #general for chatting.
#general
mikumo.
….why am i an Adult
Bonchi Rice Crackers
Because ur the Team Adult, duh.
mikumo.
I’m 15??????
Bonchi Rice Crackers
Yeah but ur an adult
mikumo.
Not in the eyes of the law???
Why does this server have an nsfw channel and WHY DID U GIVE ME ACCESS TO IT
Bonchi Rice Crackers
Ur an adult chill
Xx_Yoneya_xX
minors dni but you’re an adult so it’s Legal
mikumo.
???? I AM FIFTEEN.
Bonchi Rice Crackers
Whatever u can see a dick if u want just don’t click on it and it’s nbd
mikumo.
That continues to not be the point of this conversation, please change my role back to Child
Xx_Yoneya_xX
Kinky lmao
MEE6
Xx_Yoneya_xX has been warned.
Reason: NSFW outside of NSFW channel
Xx_Yoneya_xX
oKAY KAZAMA WE GET IT JEEZ
mikumo.
What the hell. No. what the fuck.
MEE6
mikumo. has been warned
Reason: swearing
mikumo.
Oh. My bad. Can you change my role, though?
Chameleon
Sure.
#introductions
Chameleon
@everyone
Please write your introductions here. I will go first to lay a basis of what we need
Name: Kazama Soya
Pronouns: He/Him/His
Age: 21
Zodiac: Luna Falcata, but I don’t really believe in horoscopes.
Fun Fact: I am 5’2.
#general
Ears
Everyone knows that you are 5’2, Kazama
#introductions
ContraCode
name: Konami Kirie
pronouns: she/her, but idc
age: 17
zodiac: Aptenodytes
fun fact: there was a videogame code named after me!!!
arashiyama!
Arashiyama Jun
he/his
19
Ricecannon420
Chika Amatori ;)
she/her/hers
14
Amphibious
Fun Fact: Once I ate only rice for a month and got scurvy.
=3=
Yuma Kuga
He/they/whatever
Gladius
Fun Fact: two-time winner of the Mikado City Open MMA Tournament.
Huise
Hyuss
He/hhim/his
Zoidoavd are bs
Fun fact: cnrt typiew forw short
mikumo.
My username is literally my name
15
Gemini
Fun Fact: has been excommunicated from the Catholic Church
#general
ContraCode
WHAT DO U MEAN U GOT EXCOMMUNICATED FROM THE CATHOLIC CHURCH????
torimaru.
He’s probably messing with you, Konami .
ContraCode
Really? How rude.
mikumo.
No, that actually happened
It’s a really long and really sordid story involving goats and cocaine
ContraCode
WHAT
TELL US NOW
mikumo.
I don’t wanna get in trouble for talking about drugs and such tho….
ContraCode
I TEMPORARILY WAIVE THAT RESTRICTION FOR THE SAKE OF THE STORY. GO ON.
LoneWolf
Mikumo got in trouble??? Lemme hear too!
Cub
It’s a public channel, Tachikawa…
mikumo.
Ok so
We set our scene in fair Nowhere, where… I just know the onew line of that play.
Anyway it’s 2004, I am but a small child with no sense of scale, and I have just been sent to Catholic boarding school in the middle of nowhere. It was this school for rich kids, so I think my parents wanted me to network? I don’t really know.
RindoRindo
Your parents sent you to boarding school at six?
mikumo.
yeah they move a lot for my dad’s job and figured switching schools and houses and provinces and stuff every year would be traumatic for a little kid? So I spent elementary school in various boarding-school type places
RindoRindo
…should I have a talk with your parents
mikumo.
enh I don’t really care
we get along ok I just don’t uh
actually live with them
haven’t since I was like five
it’s fine
LoneWolf
Get back to the story already
mikumo.
Ok ok jeez
So yeah a few months pass uneventfully
and then
this guy i know from latin (yes I had latin yes I know latin catholic schools are really into latin for some reason) invites me to a party
Ricecannon420
oh no
mikumo.
yeah
so I go because, well, party
so for a bit of background private school kid parties are LEGENDARY
the police get called once a week kind of legendary
someone burned down the dorms once
spoiler alert that someone was me
Ricecannon420
…is this why my brother has you in his phone as “fucking superb you funky little arsonist”?
mikumo.
…maybe? idk how your brother names his contacts
so at this party (surprisingly the arson party was a different time? I was only at this school for a semester and it put me off high school parties forever) it was abundantly clear that the small children were not in fact invited to party.
mikumo.
we were invited to make the bathtub cocktail.
I did not want to do this.
now, the thing to understand about boarding-school kids is that we either cave to the overwhelming pressure and become productive but emotionally stunted members of society, or we go completely batshit.
Ricecannon420
….yeah that tracks
mikumo.
me and your brother are the second. by the way I’m pretty sure this incident is why your parents sent you to normal elementary school
so I’m at this party
and I’m very very annoyed because when this guy whose name I forget because it’s been a decade said party I thought there would be snacks and pizza and UNO or something and now I’m supposed to mix something called a “Hawaiian Blizzard” in a bathtub which was ABSOLUTELY NOT what I came here to do
Ricecannon420
great. always a good start
Xx_Yoneya_xX
dude this sounds lit
mikumo.
I just wanted pizza L
so I start going through the cabinets
because no one is paying attention to them
Ricecannon420
osamu this is why I keep telling you to get into bank robbery
mikumo.
there are way better ways to make crime money than bank robbery. anyways I’m going through these cabinets
RindoRindo
should I be more worried about my filing cabinets
mikumo.
already looked, not interesting. moving on I get this cabinet open
and inside is just. this brick.
it’s white and it weighs less than you would think
so my small child brain goes “yay, sugar” so I lick it
not a lot
just the tip of my toungue
and it goes hot and tingly
and I go “this isn’t sugar”
so I go to the living room computer (2004, remember)
and look it up
and oh shit! it cocaine!
MEE6
mikumo. has been warned
Reason: swearing
mikumo.
also I feel like I should mention that if anyone tells the cops about this I WILL burn your house down
I can and will do that
Ricecannon420
actually please do burn my house down I hate that house
mikumo.
ok if you told on me I would have your house deemed a historical preservation site, thus ensuring that it will never be destroyed
Ricecannon420
a-hole
MEE6
Ricecannon420 has been warned
Reason: swearing
mikumo.
it picks up on that?
so I have this BRICK of cocaine
at a house party where I am the one sober person in the room (asides from Rinji but we only figured out he was even there literal years later)
so I do the logical thing
and I STEAL THE BRICK
I JUST PUT IT IN MY BACKPACK AND LEAVE
huise
ad here u thioght yoi wwre the gpod ine
mikumo.
no, yuma is the good one
so I just. I go back to my dorm
Xx_Yoneya_xX
How could you understand that keysmash?? lmao
mikumo.
and I put the brick in the top of my closet and pretend like everything is fine
it just. comes naturally
as you do
and like a few weeks later Rinji comes to my dorm room
I forget why he was there but it had something to do with us stripping the principal’s old car for scrap metal and then welding it to make a sculpture on top of his current car?????
Ricecannon420
you two do know that you’re pretty much the worst delinquents ever
mikumo.
we’re not even trying to be delinquents we just don’t believe in formal education and also we like things that carry a high risk of bodily injury like welding and urbex and scamming the yakuza
Ricecannon420
what was that last one
mikumo.
don’t worry about it. so he’s there and we’ve been awkwardly hanging out in bio lab (we were in the same one because we were both taking bio 1 and all the students get mixed together for that) for a few weeks and just when I start to get comfortable with ther being someone in my room (which I am very much storing stolen drugs in)
he just REACHES INTO MY CLOSET
PULLS OUT THE BRICK
AND ASKS WHAT IT IS.
Ricecannon420
I feel like this is really your fault for being friends with my brother
mikumo
1- hindsight is 20/20
2- it worked out so whatever
I’m just paralyzed for a second
and then he says “oh my god this is cocaine”
and my life is flashing in front of my eyes
because I figure that I’m gonna go to PRISON for the rest of my NATURAL LIFE
and there’s this long, drawn-out pause
in retrospect if i had been thirteen with no prior exposure to this sort of thing and I had pulled two kg of drugs out of the closet of the seven-year-old whose notes I was stealing I would definitely have called the cops so props to him ig
but I was freaking out
Xx_Yoneya_xX
oh my god. ohhh my god. please teach me your ways
mikumo.
if I figure them out i’ll let you know.
we sort of stared at each other and blinked
and then he said
I should reiterate right now that I was very very freaked out and also I had been awake for four days because of finals and panic combined with 96 hours of uninterrupted consciousness does strange things to a person
Glasses Supremacy #1
mood! What energy shots were you using?
mikumo.
I was abusing the chemistry lab to make Deathwish coffee actually
so he looks at me and he goes “wanna feed this to the goats”
and I was. uh. what?
and he repeats, very insistently: “do you want to feed this to the goats. ”
our school had goats by the way
one of the teachers raised them as a hobby and people used them for classes and stuff
the pen was right by the church, which is important later
Ricecannon420
oh my god
I can’t belive he told me not to build that skate ramp
his idea of fun at my age was feeding cocaine to goats
I should have built that halfpipe
mikumo.
your plan for the halfpipe included spikes?????
Ricecannon420
and? are you against women having some spiky fun?
mikumo.
look, I’ve been impaled and it’s super unpleasant so yes??? sort of??? at least not with spikes???
Ricecannon420
stop using “I’ve been impaled” to win arguements
mikumo.
I was literally in a coma the least you can do is let me win arguments.
LoneWolf
ooooo couple fight
Ricecannon420
shut UP Tachikawa
mikumo.
shut your mouth tachikawa
so we go down to the goats at like two am
and we dump the ENTIRE BRICK into the water, and we mix it up, and I sort of idly contemplate that maybe I should have just helped make the terrible bathtub drink instead
huise
at homme we knoew thids feeling as ‘mortar regret”, ity’s whern ypu turn down a medfiocre post only to enbd up in a mucvh worse one
mikumo.
useful, I’ll keep that in mind
and then we go back to bed
and the next morning. THE NEXT MORNING.
as it turns out, the bishop was visiting
but this is not my main concern.
my main concern is getting to Latin Literature And Scripture, which involves….. wait for it…. crossing the field of goats high on cocaine that I created!!!
ContraCode
JESUS
mikumo.
sadly he was not with us that day
so I go
and the first two meters is all good
I’m walking on top of a wall
a goat is ramming it
and then I ran out of wall
but I REALLY REALLY DID NOT WANT TO BE LATE FOR CLASS
SO IN AN
IMPECCABLE
LEAP OF REASONING
I jumped on a goat.
Xx_Yoneya_xX
IM CRYING PLEASE
knifecat emoji
U JUMPED ON A GOAT IM DYING
mikumo.
it was not my smartest moment but also i waqs seven so i feel like this is pretty good
I mean i didn’t DIE
so I’m riding a goat
hanging onto the horns for dear life
screaming the f-word at the top of my lungs
and who do you think steps out of the church.
guess.
Xx_Yoneya_xX
JOHN CENA
mikumo.
my life would have been way better if it had been john cena
it was the FUCKING ARCHBISHOP
MEE6
mikumo. has been warned
Reason: swearing
mikumo.
OF THE ENTIRE PROVINCE
AND I HIT HIM! ON A SPEEDING GOAT! WHILE SCREAMING OBSCENITIES!
so obvs I got excommunicated
and I never got to Latin :(
and then a week later Rinji pointed out that probably they would find cocaine in the water and my room if we checked
so we set the microwave on fire and burned the dorm down
Ricecannon420
I am never leaving you two unsupervised ever again.
mikumo.
you were five when this happened what would you have even done
Ricecannon420
NOT DRUGGED GOATS?!?!?!!
mikumo.
look, it seemed like a good idea at the time.
also, this incident is when me and Rinji decided that were Friends for Life tm
and you can’t really participate in a goat-drugging arson conspiracy with someone without becoming either friends or mortal enemies
and we both had/have like twelve mortal enemies each but neither of us had friends at the time
Ricecannon420
you know what? I’m not sure what I even expected of you two.
mikumo.
fair
so yeah that’s how I got kicked out of boarding school, excommunicated from the Catholic Church, and made a Best Friend For Life.
RindoRindo
do your parents know about this?
mikumo. is typing….
mikumo. is typing….
mikumo.
snitches get stitches and wind up in ditches.
Ricecannon420
binchers get stinchers
Xx_Yoneya_xX
LMAO WOW NOT GONNA MESS WITH YOU TWO
FUCK
fucking PUSSY eat the goats bitch
MEE6
FUCK has been muted
Reason: swearing
reijinmaru
KAEGURA.
EVERY TIME.
————
#introductions
reijinmaru
Reiji
21, Gladius
He/His
I have two cats and a lizard. They are at home because Torimaru is allergic
Glasses Supremacy #1
AAAAAH cats are so cute!!! ^v^
usami shiori
she/her
17
felis
my highest wpm typing speed is 318
PLAYBOY
IKOMA TATSUHIKO
19
FELIS
HE/HIM/HIS
FUN FACT IDK HOW TO TURN CAPSLOCK OFF
#general
Ears
Sorry but Ikoma what the fuck
MEE6
Ears has been warned.
Reason: swearing
#introductions
Bonchi Rice Crackers
Yuichi Jin
19
Note to self look up sign later
he/him
Fun fact: i know every secret couple in border. Some of them would surprise you!
#gen
TwinSnipre69
Jiiin~
Tell us who the secret coulps are~
Bonchi Rice Crackers
no~
TwinSnipre69
why~
Bonchi Rice Crackers
I have been threatened~
TwinSnipre69
By whom~
Xx_Yoneya_xX
Why are we all doing tides? It looks so stupid~
Xx_Yoneya_xX
Who could threaten the mighty Jin~
TwinSnipre69
I bet it was kitora
kitora is goddamn terrifying
knifecat emoji
she really is~
Kitora Eye
It is a skill that I have cultivated well.
Kitora Eye
And no, i have not threatened Jin. Jin does in fact know what will happen if he dares to cross me, though.
Bonchi Rice Crackers
I do~
knifecat emoji
jin!!!!!!!
Kitora Eye
Jin.
Bonchi Rice Crackers
So kitora~
You make any good progress?
Kitora Eye is typing…..
Kitora Eye
You know the answer to that question.
Bonchi Rice Crackers
I do!!!! They don’t!
Kitora Eye
…and do i need to tell them?
Bonchi Rice Crackers
no but most of border thinks you’re into osamu so take that into mind
Kitora Eye
what the fishsticks
i am a lesbian. why would they think that.
ContraCode
i have no idea babe
knifecat emoji
babe? you mean…
Bonchi Rice Crackers
Yep ;)
knifecat emoji
THEYRE DATING!!!!!!!????
ContraCode
AND?? YOU GOT A PROBLEM, SCRUB?
knifecat emoji
@Kitora Eye You seem reasonable save me from konamiiiiiii
ContraCode
what do u think babe
Kitora Eye is typing…
Kitora Eye is typing…
Kitora Eye
Get his ass.
MEE6
Kitora Eye has been warned
Reason: swearing
knifecat emoji
….play despacito at my funeral
#introductions
Commander Yotaro
Yotaro Rindo
5
boss yotaro everyone listen to me i am boss
#gen
reijinmaru
WHO GAVE YOTARO A PHONE?????
RindoRindo
MORE IMPORTANTLY, HOW DID YOTARO GET DISCORD????
Glasses Supremacy #1
Which one of you gave Yotaro Discord.
ContraCode
oh
reijinmaru
KONAMI.