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Coruscant.
Thank the stars.
Dedra gripped the handrails on her bed and shuffled her feet slowly over the edge, the coarse linen sheets clinging to her medical gown. Slowly now. Take it easy. Little by little. Left foot. Then the right foot.
Good.
She scooched herself to the edge of the bed, lowering her feet toward the cold sterile floor of Imperial Mercy Hospital. It was her afternoon routine now for the past … however long it’d been. Honestly there wasn’t much she was sure of right now.
A few days at least. Maybe a week?
Well, she was at least sure the vomiting had stopped. And the ringing in her ears. Little triumphs, really, but meaningful ones. They meant she was on the mend. Meant she could leave this nauseatingly sterile environment soon with its stinking disinfectants and constant IVs.
Meant she could get back to being useful.
She closed her eyes and exhaled a breath.
Steady on. Come on, almost there. Ok. It’s ok. You've done this before. It’ll be even easier today.
She flexed her toes and lowered a foot to the floor.
Then the other.
Before Dedra knew it, she was upright. Unsteady, but walking.
Well, shuffling really, but making progress.
And then it was done.
Collapsing in the much too solid armchair by the window in the small room, she caught her breath and willed away the dizziness, a small self-satisfied smile taking the place of her effortful grimace.
The dizziness did not, at least, last as long as yesterday’s. Or at least it seemed that way, time was an oddity at the moment and not to be entirely trusted. She watched the traffic zip by, making mental calculations about how much quicker she could get through physical therapy if she started making trips to the armchair in the mornings as well.
Not that she was scheduled to begin any exercises for a while. But the more she could get done now , the less work to be done later. And the quicker she’d get back to the office.
*
A knock on the door and soft chime sounded. Dedra scowled a little. The sun had mostly set. Had she slept?
She’d been thinking about … what?
She squinted a little against the brain fog as steps approached. They had the distinct squeak of newly shined boots. The sound of chair wheels sliding over the stark white tiles followed.
“Well, you look positively awful .” A male voice, Coruscanti accent, playful undertone.
She turned her head to greet her visitor. White uniform, tan complexion, short dark hair. The face though … She had a hard time with faces right now. Not exactly a great trait in an ISB agent. But the doctors assured her it would fade.
The man chuckled as he plopped into the chair across from her. “Regretting that uhhh … promotion to Investigations and Surveillance yet?”
She smirked a little, no longer needing his face to tell her who was sitting next to her. “You’re never going to let that go, are you?”
“Let it go?” The man gave her a quiet tut-tut. “Not when I can visit your hospital room and say ‘I told you so’.”
Sinjir Rath Velus. A Loyalty Officer. She’d collected quite a few of those during her years in Enforcement. Handy acquaintances to have in the cutthroat world of ISB politics. And all of them in possession of the same immaculate vision of anti-corruption and justice that she shared. There’d even been a time when she had considered applying for the position herself, but with all of the external threats to Imperial Peace, she never found the heart to give up her case files.
“And what do you plan to tell me, hmm?” She cocked an eyebrow at the man. “Or are you just reveling in the fact that I’m not around to show you all up anymore?”
“Ahhhh. Well, yes, that helps,” he answered. “Actually though, I think Uddra’s exact words were ‘it’s about time someone was able to shake up Partagaz’s little club’.”
Dedra scrunched her eyes closed against another bout of dizziness and groaned. “You mean to tell me Uddra doesn’t have a little club of her own? You and all her little vipers . What’s she call her facility again? Because I’ve never quite gotten the image of a child’s treehouse out of my head.”
Sinjir actually laughed at that. “Stars, Meero, you really are in a state, aren’t you?”
She opened her eyes to see him leaning in toward her, practically dissecting her with that bright glint in his look. She moved a hand up to hold her head. “Kriffing hells, I said that out loud, didn’t I?”
His grin just grew wider. “Don’t worry, don’t worry. I’m not a tattle-rattle-tale. Not exactly sure where you get ‘ treehouse’ from ‘ Viper Nest’ but sure! We can go with that for now.”
Dedra huffed a small laugh and shook her head. They sat there in silence for a moment as she readjusted herself in the armchair. Her bare feet were cold, but the hospital slippers didn’t give her enough grip on the floor to find balance. She thought about them now, all the way back there by the bed. Unable to get up and get them, and absolutely not going to ask her guest to do that for her. She shuddered a little instead with a brief chill.
“It was a fiasco,” she finally said, pursing her lips and staring back out the window. What an anti-climactic end to her ‘uniquely superior’ career as Partagaz had called it. “I’m assuming you’re here because I’m under investigation along with the whole debacle.”
Sinjir cocked his head a bit. “Actually, no.” She raised an eyebrow, but he continued pensively. “Are you the subject of infinite amounts of interoffice gossip and ISB politics? Most definitely. Has it been just … torturously tiring hearing so much about you all of the time?” He smirked. “Absolutely. But investigation?” Sinjir shook his head. “Not this time.”
She frowned. “You’re telling me that you actually found it in your withered little heart to come visit me just for the sake of … what? Friendship?”
He let out another laugh. “Friendship! Ahh, that’s a good one! Dedra, dearest, you know my heart has blackened and atrophied away to dust long ago.” He placed his hand on his chest in mock sincerity. “I am a husk of a human, an automaton built only for carrying out my orders. But I’ll give you points for creative wishing. No, I’m here investigating your precious little … Well, I’m not exactly sure what he is yet. But that’s what I’ve come to find out.”
“What in the galaxy are you talking about?” She tilted her head back to rest it a little on the stiff back of the armchair. The last rays of sunlight glinted from traffic outside and against the mirrored facades of neighboring buildings.
“Your Mr. Karn-”
Dedra snapped her attention back to Sinjir, the sudden movement causing pain behind her eyes, but she didn’t care. Her whole body tensed up, her jaw set, and she wondered at the fact that even that name could send such adrenaline through her system.
“Well,” Sinjir furrowed his brows. “ That was … a reaction.”
“He’s not ‘mine’.” She hardened her gaze as much as she could.
“Well,” the man continued. “He’s applied to the ISB on ‘merits earned in battle’ among other flowery details.”
“No!” A cold realization crept down her spine. “Wait. Hold on. Is … you called him ‘mine’? Is that … That can’t really be what people are saying?!”
Of course it could.
What a perfect way to ruin her reputation even further. Jung, Lagret, Blevin … especially Blevin. Even Grandi. They’d all just love to spin tales about how she’d karked up Ferrix and had to be dragged home by some love stricken civilian. Someone she’d charmed into her service maybe, wholly against regulations and operating without any real oversight. They were a tinderbox ready for gossip and any fuel to throw on the pyre of her career would be welcomed with open arms.
She knew Sinjir could see the sudden panic in her face, and didn’t try to hide it. The best thing she could do right now was to be as open and frank with the Loyalty Officer as possible.
He might be her one lifeline.
“Well,” he said, studying her and probably making a dozen mental notes. “You’re about all he’s spoken of. You and that Andor fellow … but honestly, according to the interviews I have to go off of, he seems less stricken with the ideals of justice and more enamored with impressing you.”
“Have you met him personally?” she asked. She couldn’t imagine Sinjir would have been taken in by the man’s ramblings. He was too well trained for that.
“I’m doing my research first,” he said. “It’s an odd enough case that someone up the ladder decided the Loyalty Office needed to vet him. You can imagine a number of us were positively salivating over this file.”
“And how many of you would have been aiming to bring me down with it?”
He shook his head. “ Pleeaase , Dedra. If anything, it’s in my interest to see this mouse droid of a man buried. I mean, just look at him! Those little doe eyes? That scriggly little neck? Ugh !” He made a disgusted face. “Can you really see him in white? Pathetic. And besides, what would Uddra say if her pet project in Partagaz’s clubhouse suffered an unrecoverable fall? No, I’m here to play my part and do my research and get all of the delicious little details.”
She huffed a sigh of relief. “Well, here’s a few for you. He’s horrid. Obsessive. Wholly disobedient, and so tunnel focused that he’d be a danger to anyone he would work with. He has absolutely no concept of the big picture, and will endeavor to do whatever he wants, no matter his orders!”
“Dis-o-bedient,” Sinjir had brought out his personal datapad and was typing notes. “Yes, please, go on! I’m all ears.”
“He’s … he’s…”
Her eyes scrunched shut again, and this time she could hear the explosions. Smell the red clay of Rix Road. She felt her fingernails starting to separate from her fingertips again through her gloves as she clawed her way toward her blaster.
Hands everywhere.
Grabbing her coat, her hair, her arms.
The rock to her head.
The boot to her chest.
The blaster at her back.
Dedra? … Hello?
She brought her arms in closer and wrapped them around herself.
“Officer Meero, come on. Be a doll and come back to me now. It’s ok, it’s just us. See? Coruscant, right outside. You’re safe.” He’d pulled his chair up closer and was leaning in toward her, probably in case she fell over.
“I … should probably lay back down. I’m sorry.”
“No apologies needed,” he answered, standing up and offering her an arm. “It’s alright. They said you’d be a bit unsteady, I think I can at least help you traverse a meter or two.”
“No,” she said, waving him off. She wanted to be able to do this on her own.
“It’s really no trouble—”
“I said NO.”
Sinjir held up his hands and took a step back. “As you wish. It’s no weakness on your part of course. But I’m sure you know that.”
She took a few breaths. “I just … I just need to prove to myself I can do this one thing, Rath Velus. Just one thing for myself right now.”
“I can only begin to imagine.” He nodded and held a hand out gesturing in the direction of the hospital bed. “At your leisure.”
Dedra took a few breaths.
It was ok. She could do this.
Moreover, she could prove to a colleague that she could do this. The extra adrenaline helped as she found her footing and stood, wobbling and shuffling more than actual walking. But eventually the bed’s rails were in her hand. She could sit herself back down onto the far-too-stiff mattress and curl under the much-too-coarse linens.
“Well done,” he told her, without a hint of irony.
“Don’t you dare give that pathetic little worm a uniform.” She met Sinjir’s eyes with all the intensity she could summon. “I’d rather go back and be dragged off by the insurgents than see him rewarded for his … his … obsessions. ”
“Duly noted.” Sinjir pressed a button near her bedside. “I told them I’d let them know when we were done so that someone could bring you dinner. Though I can’t imagine the fare here being very appetizing.”
Dedra reached up and grabbed his sleeve. “I mean it. No jokes. None of your slipping out of a conversation, Sinjir. Do not give that man a uniform.”
He met her eyes with an intense gravity and nodded. “It’s not entirely my call. But please trust me in that I’m taking your opinions quite seriously.”
She let go. “Thank you. I … I mean it. I may owe you one after this is over, and you know how much I hate being indebted.”
He chuckled lightly. “Well, if it’s any consolation, taking on this rather timely matter may have gotten me out of Chimaera rotation, so we’ll call it even.”
Dedra let herself smile a little. She was well aware of the ongoing jokes regarding that particularly odd ISD. “At least the mystery around why you had to clamor for the job is solved.”
“That … and we protect our own.” He turned smartly to the side as the door opened and a nurse droid came in with a tray. “I may call again if I need more details?”
She nodded. “You’d be more than welcome.”