Chapter Text
Stede liked Blackbeard's.
As far as queer bars went, it was certainly fun, and it suited every sort of patron. There was a central area with a dance floor and bumping music that pounded away at Stede's eardrums, where people danced and jumped and gyrated together in a big, sweaty, exciting tangle. They played music that was a satisfying mix of dance hits throughout the last forty-some years and made anyone listening want to dance and sing along. There was a VIP area next to the dance floor where people could pay exorbitant amounts of money to have bottles served to them with flashy sparklers.
But there was also a dimly-lit pool hall and lounge area behind a black door for those who enjoyed something more laid back and conversational, where one could play games and laugh with friends without having to worry about shouting to be heard over the music -- maybe even eat some bar food to curb the impending hangover. Stede appreciated the variety of choice. The ability to choose the kind of night he wanted to have without ever needing to go to a different place, and all in one queer-friendly establishment!
A long time ago, he'd spent years trying to convince his now-ex, Vincent, to come with him here and check it out. He'd never seemed interested before. Until today, apparently.
So yes, Stede really liked Blackbeard's. He liked the concept and the way all the regulars seemed to know each other. He liked the ambiance and green glass lamps and dark wood bar and the pink wallpaper patterned with birds of paradise. However, he thought he would have liked it a lot more if he didn't feel so miserable. And guilty for feeling miserable. He should be happy for his friend, right?
But right now, sitting at the bar of Blackbeard's at Vincent's engagement party, alone because Vincent had insisted all the couples get up and dance together before pointedly blowing a kiss at Stede? Yeah, he was having a hard time staying enthusiastic.
Not that Stede would ever bring up his discomfort to his friends. God forbid, if it came down to choosing sides, Stede couldn't imagine that they would ever pick Stede. And then Stede would be alone, and that would be worse.
Well, he had Mary and Doug, of course, but it seemed kind of pathetic to seek refuge from an ex-boyfriend in his ex-wife (and her new husband).
And Mary and Doug were having fun. They were dancing with the others, singing loudly to the songs that pounded in Stede's ears. With Vincent and his fiancé Derek. With all the other couples at the engagement party. Which conveniently left Stede as the only one alone. Pointedly and painfully alone.
Vincent had insisted on doing something "fun" for the engagement party with their smaller group of friends. He claimed he hadn't felt like entertaining -- even though Stede knew for a fact that that was one of Vincent's favorite activities. Vincent loved any excuse to host a fancy party and put on his best clothes and gossip over champaign all night (he and Stede had initially got on so well because of that, though Stede liked everything that went into preparing and dressing for such events and not so much attending them or speaking to the people there).
No, instead Vincent wanted to "feel young again" and go to the cool queer bar downtown. Dance and drink and get obscenely expensive bottle service served with flashy sparklers at a VIP table.
And Stede was sure it was a total coincidence that it was the same queer bar that Stede had tried to get Vincent to go to for years when they used to be together. It had to be. He didn't make all of his decisions based on what would torture Stede the most. The two of them hadn't so much as exchanged a kiss in the last three years, and he was engaged to someone else. It would be borderline narcissistic of Stede to think that he chose Blackbeard's Bar and Grill just to get under Stede's skin.
Right?
"What're you drinking, mate?" a voice called out, surprisingly close to him to be heard over the music.
Stede tore his gaze away from the dancing couples, landing on...
Oh.
Possibly the most beautiful man Stede had ever seen, leaning on the barstool next to him.
Stede's eyes roved up and down the man, from his tight leather pants to his impressive salt-and-pepper beard and long hair, tied in a half knot at the back of his head, the rest loose around his shoulders. His ears were pierced, long sword pendants hanging from his lobes.
He was dressed in a black mesh top that showed off brown skin, a soft belly, and the black ink of many tattoos in a way that made a blush creep over Stede's skin, and a black leather jacket that looked worn in with use.
But frankly the most attractive, most unfair thing about him, was the way he held himself. He had a confident ease about him in the tilt of his hips against the bar. Wide, expressive brown eyes that were lidded with rather unfairly long and dark eyelashes. Full lips that curved in a mischievous smile as he watched Stede. The picture of a man who knew how to use all of his charms.
He looked cool and alternative and everything that Stede was not. He was gorgeous and unreal and Stede frankly couldn't believe the man was even paying a lick of attention to him, let alone meeting his eyes with that inquisitive and slightly amused expression, waiting for Stede to answer his question.
Which reminded Stede.
"What did you say?" He asked, blinking and hoping he didn't look like a fool for staring at the man wordlessly for what felt like an eternity.
The man only chuckled, his eyes crinkling in a smile at the corners. He leaned in closer, as though Stede hadn't heard him. "I said, what are you drinking?" he asked, breath ghosting over Stede's cheek.
"Oh. Um. Brandy?" Stede wasn't sure why it came out like a question, or why his fingers were clutched so tightly around his current empty glass.
The other man only smiled and hailed the bartender -- a short, angry-looking man also dressed in leather and with an X tattooed on his cheek. "Perfect. Next one's on me."
"Oh, thank you, but you really don't have to--"
"I know, but I want to," the man said simply, turning to have a short conversation with the bartender that Stede couldn't hear over the pounding music. Though he didn't need to hear anything to understand the murderous look the bartender shot him, even if he was at a complete loss as to what he had done to earn it.
Two glasses of brandy were poured and placed in front of them, perhaps a bit harder than they needed to be, but the man beside Stede still smiled and shot a "Thank you, Iz," at the retreating bartender.
"Are you a regular here?" Stede asked, noting the familiarity.
He gave a noncommittal shrug and picked up his glass. "You could say that. Now, you don't have to drink that if you don't want to, of course, but if you don't, I'll have to."
Stede smiled slightly, picking up the offered glass, tapping against the other man's in a cheers before taking a sip.
"Oh, this is the good stuff," Stede said, taking a moment to appreciatively swirl the amber liquid. Notes of oak and citrus rolled over his tongue.
"'Course," he said nonchalantly, though the satisfied glimmer in his eyes gave him away. He brushed his hair over one shoulder, tilting his head to one side. "Gotta pull out all the stops for the pretty posh blond. I aim to impress."
Stede's brain stuttered for a moment. Was he... was he being hit on? Surely that couldn't be right. Stede didn't get hit on in bars -- not that he went to many lately. But the man had called him pretty, hadn't he? And that was sort of doing something for him.
"You didn't even need the drink to do that," he said, blushing at his own boldness until he noticed the man's eyes narrow, mouth curving in a smile, leaning closer to him with his chin propped on his fist on the bar. Suddenly Stede felt emboldened. "So, do you throw around this kind of money on brandy to impress every blond man that catches your eye? If so, I worry for your financial security."
That made him let out a real belly laugh. "Not every blond man. Only the intriguingly handsome ones. Like the ones named..." he trailed off, bumping Stede's shoulder in an invitation.
Stede grinned at the compliment and the beautiful man's attention, even if he wasn't quite sure how to hold himself under it, reaching out a hand. "Stede."
The man grinned right back. "Nice to meet you, Stede," he purred, taking Stede's hand firmly in his own leather-gloved one, making Stede gasp as he raised it and pressed his lips to Stede's skin in an imitation of a gentlemanly kiss. "I'm Ed."
Ed. Now wasn't that lovely?
***
Jack wouldn't leave Ed the fuck alone.
Ed should have known. "Just a drink" with Jack was never actually just a drink. It was a drink and then another drink, and then Jack would say just the right thing to make Ed feel shitty enough to feel the need to impress the man, make him do something stupid and reckless, then drunken, unsatisfying, regretful sex in Ed's apartment above the bar. Only to find out later that it usually only happened because Jack needed a place to crash for the night and figured he might as well get his dick wet for the effort.
Ed needed to get rid of Jack, once and for all. The man was far more trouble than he was worth. He was easily-avoidable encounters with the cops. He was Ed's fucked knee in a stupid motorcycle accident. He was the reason Ed had to purchase all new glassware for the bar on two separate occasions. He was the enabling voice in Ed's mind that pressed his foot to the gas when his more reasonable self was screaming to hit the brakes. He was like termites or cockroaches that refused to get lost for good no matter how many times you spray them with poison.
The sex wasn't even that good. It was serviceable, but Jack was the only consistent hookup he'd had in at least... what... four or five years? Fuck, that was depressing.
Ed had been stewing over that fact over their first drink of the night. Well, it was Ed's first of the night. Jack was already two sheets to the fuckin' wind. Sloppy, spilling, crowding into Ed's space with breath that reeked of cheap beer.
Ed reached his breaking point when Jack accused him of playing hard to get. When Ed told him to fuck off, Jack got in his face with a toothy grin, leaning in to speak in Ed's ear.
"Who else do you have to go home with, Eddie? Come on, I know how this little song and dance goes. I know you'll get lonely. And I know your own hand can't be better than bouncing on my dick-- shit!" Jack's face contorted in anger as the rest of Ed's drink was unceremoniously dumped on him. "The fuck is your problem, man?"
Ed shot Jack the middle finger as he stalked away from the man. "Fuck off, Jack. Go use your own fuckin' hand and leave me the fuck out of it."
"Oh I'll see you later, Eddie!" Jack called after him, clearly still pissed but also infuriatingly smug. "I know you can't stay away from all this!"
Ed shoved his way through the crowd of bar patrons and gyrating bodies as fast as he could, just trying to put distance between him and Jack, letting the blaring music drown out his thoughts with mixed success.
Honestly, fuck Jack. Ed could do so much better than fuckin' "Calico" Jack. Just because he'd been in a funk for a few years that didn't mean... Well, Ed knew he was attractive. He could be sexy. He could. And he could pull someone so completely opposite to Jack they might as well be from different planets.
Enter the gorgeous posh blond bloke at the end of the bar.
Oh, he would do nicely.
***
Ed had taken Stede to one of the quiet lounge tables in the back of the bar, separated from the dance floor by a wood-paneled wall. They chatted amiably, comfortably -- Stede even dared to hope flirtatiously, though he had never been the best at gauging such things himself. He'd never really been in the bar scene or in queer spaces. At least, not in the short time between the end of his marriage and the beginning of his relationship with Vincent, and then once that had ended, he'd sort of convinced himself he was too old to just start getting into it.
But talking with Ed, a practical stranger, was fun. It was easy. He didn't want to stop. Though Stede supposed that could have been the brandy that kept magically arriving at their table. He didn't feel like he was too old or out of touch to be here at this queer bar, talking to this man that made him laugh harder than he remembered laughing in a long time. Clearly Ed was comfortable here, and Stede could feel Ed welcoming him in.
And throughout it all, Ed touched him. Small, friendly touches that felt intimate in a foreign, though not unpleasant, way to Stede. In fact, it was quite nice to feel human touch this way. Almost heady, overwhelming. Ed overwhelmed Stede -- everything about him from his looks to his quick wit to his burning touches to his confidence -- and Stede loved it.
Ed even made him laugh about the time he had blown up his whole life in one fell swoop.
"You're fuckin' joking. That's how you came out?" Ed asked, eyes wide and amused.
Stede looked at him sidelong, coy. "What? Screaming 'I'M GAY' in the middle of your father's business merger isn't typical?"
"I'd think the fuck not. Though I can't say I've ever been to one. How the hell did that happen?" Ed asked, slinging his arm over Stede's shoulders. A casual, friendly touch that inexplicably made Stede feel like he was on fire.
Stede sighed. "My father was planning on retiring after the merger and I was expected to run the business and I just... I was already drowning there. I couldn't stand the thought of being tied to that place any more than I already was. Honestly... the thought made me want to shrivel up into a ball and die." Stede took a nervous sip of his drink, worried that maybe that was too much too soon for a man he had just met an hour ago. Surely he couldn't care about Stede's pathetic, privileged life. But when Stede finally met his eyes, Ed was watching him intently, curious, caring, open in a way that most people usually aren't. The earnestness of that look nearly pushed Stede flat on his back. "Let's just say I knew my father's business partners wouldn't approve of me taking over the company in my father's stead if certain truths about me came to light."
"Well then, they're sacks of shit and I'm glad you got out," Ed said, certain, raising his glass to Stede.
"Agreed," Stede said with a smile, tapping his glass against Ed's.
"Still a fuckin' mental way to go about it though," Ed said with a teasing grin.
Stede shrugged, an easy grin on his lips as the liquor did its work. "Screaming it in the middle of a public meeting seemed as good an option as anything else at the time. Not easily covered up in an email trail, at least, which is what I was going for. Though, I probably should have told my then-wife first." Stede cringed. That had not been an easy conversation, even if Mary was understanding in the end.
Ed chuckled, squeezing Stede's shoulder. "Anyone ever tell you you're a bit of a lunatic?" Stede blushed in embarrassment, unsure of how to take that, if he was being made fun of, even though Ed had said it affectionately enough.
Ed must have seen Stede scrambling for an appropriate response, because he smiled, leaning in until his lips just brushed the shell of Stede's ear, making him shiver. "I like it. That was brave of you, mate."
Stede turned, pulling away slightly to look at Ed in disbelief. "You really think so?" That stunt had been called many things: crazy, reckless, stupid, ill-timed, ruinous... but never brave.
Ed slapped an excited hand against the table, making their glasses clatter and Stede let out a nervous giggle. "Of course, man! You risked everything for a chance to be happy and live authentically! That's fuckin' brave."
"Huh, I suppose I've never thought of it that way before," Stede said, something warm taking up residence in his chest at the thought.
"So what do you do now?" Ed asked. "Hopefully something significantly less soul-sucking?"
Stede chuckled. "Definitely not soul-sucking. I own a gallery-slash-studio space for queer artists. My ex-wife is an artist, so she kind of gave me the idea."
Ed shoved him playfully, a wide, toothy grin that slightly dazzled Stede. "Fuck off! That's fuckin' awesome!"
Stede smiled shyly. "That's kind of you to say. I don't make art myself, but I like being in that kind of environment, around creatives and such, you know? Keeps things interesting." Stede pulled out his phone and flipped through pictures of some of the art they had on show from his resident artists. Some of it went a bit over Stede's head, if he was honest, but he supported his artists all the same. Ed seemed to take it all in, rapt.
"Mate, you should show some of the art here! Have an event or something," Ed said excitedly.
Stede tilted his head thoughtfully. It wasn't a bad idea actually, getting more involved with the greater local queer community, maybe drum up some interest, celebrate the talent of his resident artists. Stede grinned. "That's a great idea, Ed! Though I'll probably have to arrange something with whoever owns the place. But oh, listen to me, I've monopolized our conversation for too long! What is it that you do, Ed?"
Ed's smile quickly turned mischievous as he leaned closer to Stede, his free hand coming to rest on Stede's knee. "I'm the guy who owns the place, mate."
Stede blinked. "Oh."
"Yeah, 'oh,'" Ed said, eyes on Stede's lips.
Then suddenly Ed was very close, and getting closer, and was that his hand slowly sliding up Stede's leg? And oh my god Stede felt like he was on fire because this gorgeous man was touching him and--
"Stede! There you are!"
***
Stede jerked at the sound of the intruder's voice, bursting their private little bubble. Ed seethed. Of course they were interrupted right when Stede seemed like he was finally getting comfortable. Right when Ed was leaning in for the kiss. And now Stede seemed tenser than ever under his hands as he turned to face their interrupter.
"Ah, Vincent... were you looking for me?" Stede asked, terse even as he put on what looked to be a very practiced smile.
"Well when I went to the bar for a top-up and didn't see you there, I started to worry that you had left without telling anyone!" Vincent said, and to Ed's horror, slid into the booth on Stede's other side.
Already, Ed could tell Vincent was posh. Sort of like Stede, except that Stede didn't look like his resting expression was smug. Even from the short amount of time that Ed had spent with Stede tonight, he could tell that Stede was unfailingly kind, considerate even if he also had a streak of bitchiness that set Ed's blood on fire. No, Vincent looked like he was shrewd and calculating to his core, sizing up Ed and Ed's arm around Stede's shoulders.
Vincent ran a hand through his dark, overly-gelled hair as he pressed against Stede's side in a mock whisper that was certainly intentionally loud enough for Ed to hear. "Stedey, are you out cruising for a date to my wedding? He's not exactly who I would have pictured you with," he said, giving Ed a once-over. "Though I kind of love the idea of you coming with a one-night stand."
He said it conspiratorially, like he and Stede were in on some joke together, but if Ed was correct, Stede looked more mortified than anything else.
Ed immediately hated this guy. He barely knew anything about him, but he could already tell he was mean, and passive aggressive, and fucking pushy. He knew Stede, maybe even called himself a friend, but he was clearly making Stede uncomfortable, making him shrink in on himself when Ed had spent so much time drawing him out, and Ed didn't fucking like that.
And yeah, maybe Ed didn't really have room to talk, because he initially started flirting with Stede just to stick it to Jack, but Stede was hot and sweet and fucking funny, and Ed hated that this fucker was trying to embarrass him.
"Um, actually Vincent, this is Ed. Uh... he and I don't--"
"Nice to meet you, mate," Ed interrupted, shaking Vincent's hand and giving him the best fake smile he could muster. "Stede and I are actually good mates. But he finally agreed to let me take him out after a few years of begging," Ed lied, bumping a bewildered-looking Stede's shoulder affectionately.
Vincent's smile went tight around the edges, eyes flashing. "Is that so? Odd, I can't say I've ever heard of you, Ed."
Ed tilted his head to one side. "Can't say I've ever heard of you either, Vince." Ed eased back in his seat, sliding his hand down so his arm wrapped around Stede's waist, tugging him closer against his side and thankfully pulling Stede away from where Vincent hung off of him. Ed was thankful that Stede was going along with it, or at least not protesting against Ed's blatant lies. It made Ed think he had read the situation correctly.
"Hmm... How is it that you two know each other, exactly?" Vincent asked, eyes narrowed.
Stede shot Ed a quick, slightly panicked look, before his face smoothed over again to face Vincent. "Well, Ed owns the bar--"
"Yeah, queer business owners have to stick together and all that," Ed said, picking up the thread, pleased that Stede was playing along. "Sure, at first I was just hitting up the handsome blond at my bar for his number, but we got to talking and really hit it off, and the rest is history." Ed shrugged, grinning at Stede like he was besotted, a little thrill shooting through him at Stede's dazzled look.
"How lovely..." Vincent simpered. "Stedey is so great! You're so lucky. We used to date, you know? I'm so glad he's finally found someone new. I was starting to get worried he'd have to come to the wedding all alone!" Vincent grinned, finally sliding out of their booth. "But I'm sure you'll clean up nice in a suit," he said, winking before strutting back to the crowded dance floor, where he caught the waist of a tall brunette man, grinding up against him. Ed was sure he was glaring and didn't care to stop himself.
Stede's face was in his hands now. "Oh my god, Ed I am so sorry about that."
Ed huffed. "Not your fault he's a dick."
Stede scrubbed his hands down his face and sighed. "Vincent means well, I suppose. It's just... complicated."
Ed wasn't so sure about that, but he wasn't gonna argue with Stede about it. He'd only known the man an hour or so and he'd already thrown himself into his business.
"Thank you for saving me there," Stede said, shooting Ed a grateful look. "I don't know why I just froze up like that."
Ed nodded. "I get it. Dealing with exes is fuckin' hard."
"It is hard," Stede agreed, letting out a little nervous laugh. "Thank you for understanding. I just don't want you to feel like I was using you."
Ed chuckled. "Mate, I'm the one who lied about us knowing each other."
The corners of Stede's mouth turned up. "Yes, I suppose that's true."
"Admit it, it felt good to make him a little mad," Ed teased.
"Honestly?" Stede took a furtive glance around, like he was worried about being overheard. "It felt fucking fantastic." He giggled, relaxing. "God, that feels good to admit."
"Yeah?"
"Ed, I don't think you even understand how you said the perfect things to get under his skin. I tried to get him to come here with me for years when we were still together--"
"And he finally decided to come here with some other guy?" Ed frowned.
"Well, for his engagement party," Stede corrected.
"Fuck off," Ed said, mouth dropping open. Oh, this guy was fucking petty. Ed felt zero guilt winding him up.
Stede smirked, rueful. "Him thinking that I've got a thing going on with the owner..."
"He'll be wondering why you were so eager to come here," Ed teased, putting his fingers under Stede's chin. "If you wanted to come and make eyes at the handsome owner the whole time."
Stede laughed, a bubbling, nervous thing. "Does it make me a bad friend if I kind of want him to think that?"
Ed wasn't sure why Stede was friends with his ex at all, though Ed supposed he wasn't exactly in any place to judge. "Nah. Makes you human, and sometimes humans are petty."
Stede smiled at him then, a real, shining thing that made Ed's breath catch. That wasn't supposed to happen. This was supposed to be casual, easy. Ed was just proving a point. He absolutely didn't feel anything for the handsome, funny, kind man who he had just met hours ago. "Ed, would you maybe want to dance with me?" And that question was so earnest, so hopeful...
Who was Ed to say no?
***
Ed couldn't remember the last time he'd danced in his own bar, let alone had fun while doing so. But dancing with Stede was fucking fun. How did he do that?
All of Stede's shyness seemed to have washed away with their last glass of brandy, and while Ed wouldn't go so far as to say Stede was a good dancer, he was certainly enthusiastic, and easy to dance with, and that was sexy in its own way. He hopped up and down and swayed his hips to the beat of the music and did truly terribly outdated moves seemingly just to see Ed laugh. And it worked every time. Ed felt light and bubbly in a way he hadn't in a long time.
Stede was fucking hot and adorable and dorky and something about it was really fucking working for Ed. He moved in close, putting his hands on Stede's hips. Stede grinned, throwing his arms loosely around Ed's neck, letting him control their movement, their speed, the stupidly sexy sway of Stede's hips. Soon they were moving together, against each other, chests brushing and breath mixing and hands wandering. It wasn't even the dirtiest dancing that Ed had ever done, but for some reason, with Stede's breathy little gasps in his ear every time their chests brushed together, it felt fucking filthy.
And then they were closing in, coming together like magnets to their poles, their lips only a breath away--
"Eddie!"
***
Stede was punted out of his trance by a visibly-drunk mustachioed man dressed like a poor imitation of a cowboy clapping Ed on the shoulder and dragging Ed out of his arms.
"Eddie, c'mon man you've made your point, let's just get out of here!" the man complained, practically hanging off of Ed, attempting to tug him away. It was difficult to hear him speak over the music, but thankfully, the man seemed more than comfortable shouting.
Ed shrugged out of the other man's touch, visibly annoyed. "I thought I told you to fuck off, Jack."
The man -- Jack, apparently -- sneered. "And I told you that I'd see you later." He tried reaching for Ed's waist, but Ed quickly sidestepped, making Jack stumble.
"C'mon, will you quit acting like a baby? Not like you have anyone better to take home with you." Jack reached for him again, and Stede watched Ed stiffen and shrink in on himself in a way that just felt wrong. Ed was cool and confident and was easy with a laugh. Ed was kind and protective and had been so sure of himself when he had been covering for Stede. And even though Stede had only known Ed for a few hours at this point, the thought of him being pushed around and belittled like this made his blood absolutely boil.
Before Jack could touch Ed again, Stede pressed himself close to Ed's side, snaking a protective arm around his waist. "Is everything alright, darling?" Stede asked with a plastered-on smile. He made a show of giving Jack a skeptical look up and down. "Friend of yours?"
Ed leaned into Stede, and Stede could feel him relax incrementally. "He was just leaving," Ed said, his tone brokering no room for argument.
Jack glared at Stede, and Stede tilted his chin up, doing his best to look unimpressed. No way was Stede backing down now.
Jack scoffed, turning away. "Whatever. I need another drink," he grumbled, stalking back towards the bar.
Ed waited until Jack was swallowed by the crowd before releasing a relieved breath.
Stede stepped in front of him to get a better look at his face, concerned. "Are you alright, Ed?"
Ed nodded. "'M fine." He took a beat before turning a rueful smile on Stede. "That was the ex. Figure we're even now."
Stede blinked. "Oh."
There was a moment of stunned silence between them before they both broke down in ironic laughter.
"We're a mess, mate," Ed laughed.
"Quite the pair, aren't we?" Stede agreed.
"Thanks for having my back," Ed said, putting a hand on Stede's shoulder with a grin that did something to Stede's insides.
"Well, it only seemed like the right thing to do after you had mine," Stede said, grinning back. "Besides he really seemed like..." Stede trailed off, trying to find a word that wouldn't inadvertently offend Ed for his taste in men.
"Like a jackass?" Ed supplied.
"Yeah, like a total jackass!" Stede agreed quickly.
Ed chuckled. "He is. He's not all bad, I guess. We've been through a lot together, ya know? Owe him a lot." Though Ed himself didn't seem so convinced of that.
But Stede nodded anyway. It wasn't his business, he supposed. Even if he very much wanted to meddle. "Well, you know my situation. Like you said, exes are... complicated."
Ed nodded, emphatic. "Ain't that the fuckin' truth."
It seemed like Ed was relaxing and coming back to himself more with every moment now that Jack was gone. Stede wanted him to know that he wasn't going to judge him, wanted him to be having fun again. "Perhaps we need some catharsis."
Ed raised an eyebrow, a slow, secret smile spreading. "What did you have in mind?"
***
They were at a VIP table now, with a bottle. Stede wasn't sure what it was except that it was clear, and it stopped burning its way down his throat approximately twenty minutes ago. They passed it back and forth, pouring it into mixers and exchanging horror stories.
"...And then he told me it wasn't cheating because technically we weren't together!" Ed exclaimed, spreading his hands wide. "Can you believe that shit?"
"You're joking. After he asked to move in?" Stede was dumbstruck. He hated Jack more and more by the minute, and he'd only heard the man speak three sentences.
"Yup. He said we were 'roommates with benefits,'" Ed said in a sing-song tone before leaning in conspiratorially. "You wanna know the worst part? I still slept with him after that for years."
"Oh, Ed..."
"Yeah, yeah, I know. Trust me," Ed chuckled, tipping his drink to Stede. "Your turn. How did you and Vinny cark it?"
Stede giggled at the nickname that he knew Vincent would hate. The liquor was really starting to go to his head now, but he was feeling good, laughing with Ed as they commiserated together. He propped his chin in his hand as he recounted it. "A group of our friends went on a week-long trip to stay in one of our friend's beach house. He broke up with me on the beach three days in."
"Christ has he never heard of timing?"
"Oh it gets worse," Stede warned, smirking at Ed's wary expression. "He told me that he didn't want to 'mess up the vibe' of the trip for everyone, so we kept it a secret until we got back home four days later."
"No fuckin' way..."
Stede nodded. "Yes way. Which meant we were still doing all of the couples’ activities together, sleeping in the same bed, and generally just acting like we were still together and having fun for four whole days -- without internet or phone service might I add -- shoved together with four other couples in a crowded beach house, so there wasn't even any cry space!"
Ed stared at him in horror. "Okay, you win. That sounds like literal psychological torture," Ed said, taking a long drink.
Stede giggled, so far removed from that day and so warm with alcohol that it all seemed a little funny. "It sort of was, I suppose." Ed looked at him like he was crazy for laughing. "You know the worst part?"
"No..."
"I still slept with him after that for two years," he laughed, clapping a hand over his mouth. It wasn't funny. It really wasn't, but Stede couldn't stop.
"Stede!"
Stede waved him off. "Oh like you're one to talk!" he threw back playfully, and Ed snorted. "Worst date you've ever been on with Jack?" Stede asked, swirling the contents of his shot glass. "I think mine was when Vincent took me golfing." Stede put two thumbs down, blowing a raspberry, making Ed let out a surprised bark of a laugh. "Bor-ing! I think I hate golf. I can't believe I bought a special outfit for it! Couldn't even hit the ball half the time so I started just surveying the different plants on the edge of the course while Vincent played and then he got mad that I wasn't paying attention! There wasn't even a good variety of native flora so the whole day was a wash!"
Ed was holding his stomach, folded over with giggles that made his nose scrunch adorably. His laugh was infectious, and soon Stede was giggling too. "You're fuckin' great, you know that?" Ed said, wiping the corner of one eye.
Stede wasn't sure it was possible for him to flush even further -- not with the alcohol warming him like he knew it was -- but he felt heat rush to his face at the compliment nonetheless. "You're too kind. And you're pretty fantastic yourself."
The corners of Ed's mouth curled up, mirroring Stede's posture and leaning closer as he propped his chin in one leather-gloved hand. Stede wondered if there were more tattoos under that leather. It seemed like there would be. Ed had shed his leather jacket when they were dancing earlier, leaving him in his black mesh shirt (Stede had nearly had a heart attack when he realized in addition to the pierced ears, Ed also had pierced nipples, and he was fairly certain he had done a terrible job of not staring). There were tattoos all along both of his arms, and on one arm he had what looked like a long, coiling snake that wrapped around his shoulder and ducked down under the edge of that one glove. Stede wanted to peel it off, to trace the lines of the tattoo with his own fingers, to learn the shape of it by touch alone.
Stede blinked, embarrassed by his own thoughts. He was definitely drunk.
"Worst date you've been on?" Stede blurted, trying to pick up the thread of their conversation. He wondered how long it had been since he'd actually looked Ed in the eyes. All he remembered was his hands or his hair or his piercings or his lips...
Oh but he didn't find any respite in his eyes either. Warm and deep brown and expressive, smile lines crinkling around them, framed by long, dark lashes. Inviting. Enthralling. Turns out every part of Ed was beautifully confounding.
Ed sighed, blowing a few loose strands of hair away from his face, and even that was charming. "I don't think Jack ever took me on a real one," Ed said after a few moments of thought.
Stede felt his mouth drop open in horror. "You can't be serious! He never took you on a real date?"
Ed shrugged. "Unless you count getting drinks at my own bar."
"Of course not!"
"Then I guess not."
Stede was pretty sure he hated Jack. "Okay you win that one. That's ridiculous," Stede said, drinking.
Ed tilted his head to one side. "Why are you so shocked about that?"
Stede stared at him incredulously. "Well, look at you!" Stede said, flapping his hands in Ed's general direction. When Ed only looked at him curiously, Stede made a frustrated noise in the back of his throat. "You're seriously one of the most gorgeous people I've ever met," Stede said, certain he would be mortified about this when he was sober, but needing Ed to understand. "And you're funny, and kind, and charismatic, and... I just can't imagine someone being so ungrateful to your presence!" Stede finished on a huff.
Ed smiled shyly, gaze ducking away. "You've only known me a few hours mate. Could be a shit person for all you know."
Stede scoffed. "I've only known you for a few hours, and you've already stuck up for me. I've had more fun with you than I've had with most my friends in years," Stede said, nodding towards where he could see the group he had come with gathering at one of the other VIP tables a few tables away from theirs, laughing raucously together.
"No offense mate, but your friends seem kind of shit," Ed said, and Stede smiled at the protectiveness he heard there already. Shit person indeed...
"They're not so bad," Stede said, "I just don't like to burden them with my problems." He got on with them well enough -- some more than others certainly. He didn't need them knowing how pathetic he really was.
Mary caught Stede's eye a few tables over and gave him an exaggerated thumbs up of approval and a wink when she saw who he was sitting with. Stede laughed, giving her a little wave back and pointing her out to Ed. "See, that's my ex-wife, Mary, and I think she's delighted that I'm talking to such a handsome man."
He thought Ed might have blushed a bit as he also offered a timid wave to Mary, who returned it by blowing him a kiss. Ed chuckled. "Yeah, she seems alright." He turned to face Stede again. "So that makes two of your exes that I've met tonight? Should I be on the lookout for anyone else?" Ed teased.
Stede wrung his hands, letting out a nervous laugh. "No, they're uh, actually the only two people I've seriously dated. Mary and I were high school sweethearts and basically pushed together by our families. Got married young when I was still trying to convince myself I was straight. Honestly, we became much better friends after we divorced. Vincent was the first guy I dated after I came out. Had a few flings since him but nothing that's really stuck." And oh god, Ed didn't want to hear all that. Ed was so cool and experienced and sure of himself and Stede had somehow dumped all of his baggage on the other man in the span of a few hours. "Sorry, is that weird? It's weird, right? I only just met you and you've already met all of my exes--"
Suddenly there was a warm hand on his forearm, tugging him back to reality. "Stede, mate it's okay. I was only joking. You met mine too, remember? I'm just laughing at the circumstances."
Stede let out a relieved breath, settling. "Right. Thank you, Ed. You're very understanding."
"Not hard to understand, mate. Life is fuckin' weird and complicated. I get it." Ed poured them both new shots, eyes flicking to Stede playfully. "You ever do anything to get revenge on your ex?" Ed asked, picking up their game where they left it.
"Revenge?"
"Yeah. Could be something petty or something serious. I'm curious since you seem kind of mad."
"Hey!"
"Just callin' em' like I see em'."
"Well, how have you gotten revenge, if you're so well-adjusted?"
Ed laughed. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves. I never said I was any better," Ed said, thoughtfully tracing a finger along the bone in Stede's wrist. Stede tried and failed to hide the shiver that the featherlight touch caused. "After Jack cheated on me, I slashed his tires."
Stede nodded sagely. "Good. He deserved it."
"What about you?" Ed asked, nudging him with his elbow. "You never did anything to get revenge on Vincent for being a shit?"
Stede thought about it for a moment. "Well... I did do one thing. God, it's kind of embarrassing, actually."
But that only seemed to excite Ed, who scooched closer, and Stede wondered if he was ever going to feel normal about Ed's proximity. As it was, his heart was lurching into his throat. Probably from all the drinks. Yeah. Definitely.
"Come on, don't back down now, mate. You have to tell me," Ed goaded.
Stede rolled his eyes, even if Ed's stupid adorable smile was infectious. "I mean it's nothing too crazy. I just kind of... used Vincent's phone number and email to sign up for a bunch of spam messages and phone calls," Stede said quickly. "I mean, I didn't go searching for stuff, but it's easy enough to pass off someone else's information as your own and sign up for a bunch of store coupons and offers and newsletters and such. And all those places sell your information so then you get more spam and, well..." Stede trailed off to find Ed looking at him with awe. He smirked. "He had to get a new phone number and email address. I think Bed Bath and Beyond broke him."
Ed burst into a real belly laugh then. "That's fuckin' diabolical," he said, pulling Stede in close against his side. Stede's heart definitely didn't race at the way Ed's hand skimmed along his waist.
"Er, honestly, he probably got the better revenge on paper," Stede stammered, face hot.
"How's that?"
Stede pointed to where Vincent and Derek sat together at their VIP table, pressed close and whispering in each other’s ears. "He's engaged to the first guy I slept with after we broke up." Stede clapped a hand over his mouth to stifle a bout of drunken giggles.
Ed stared at him in disbelief. "Stede, I mean this with all the respect in the world, but how the fuck are you still friends with these people?"
Stede waved him off. "Eh... they're a better match anyway. Derek's sort of..." Stede paused, scrunching up his nose a bit. "He's a bit boring for me honestly, and Vincent likes having someone to boss around. We always clashed in that way."
Ed smirked. "A bit bossy, are ya?"
Stede huffed. "Is it so wrong to like doing things a particular way? Though some have called me bossy, yes."
Ed laughed. "I like that."
"Oh?"
Ed nodded. "Definitely." Then he leaned in so he was speaking in Stede's ear, breath ghosting along Stede's neck. "You know, I could help you get more revenge, if you wanted."
Stede's skin prickled with goosebumps, even in the sweltering heat of the bar. "Why would you do that?" Stede asked, voice unsteady.
"Because Vincent seems like a prick, and every time I catch him staring at us and I'm touching you, he looks pissed. Like he doesn't want anyone else playing with his favorite toy," Ed said, voice low and gravelly as his free hand traced along the side of Stede's neck. Stede wasn't so sure about that. Vincent had always seemed pretty unruffled by Stede. Ed cocked his head to one side, considering. "Plus, you would be helping me with Jack too."
Stede's eye's landed on Jack, who stood by the bar looking absolutely murderous in Stede's direction. "He's looking at us too," Stede observed.
"Mmhmm..." Ed hummed, like he'd known that all along, tracing his nose along Stede's jawline.
Stede tried not to feel disappointment. It had all been a bit too good to be true. That's why Ed was touching him, acting close. Jack was watching, and Ed wanted him off his back. That stung a bit, but Stede wasn't going to tell him to stop. And honestly? He did get some perverse satisfaction out of making such a horrible man angry and jealous.
Stede placed a tentative hand on Ed's thigh. "I don't think I would be opposed," he said. "What did you have in mind?"
Ed pulled back enough so that Stede could see his grin, and already Stede could see the gears turning in Ed's mind. "Do you wanna do something weird?"
***
Ed usually wasn't one for bottle service in his own bar. It was usually a little too flashy when he just wanted to sit back and drink in peace. The bottle he and Stede already had at their table had been delivered discretely, subtly so they could continue their conversation in peace.
But right now, they wanted the opposite of subtlety. Ed wanted flashy and ostentatious and attention-grabbing and envy-inspiring. So he told Izzy to order them the most expensive bottle service they served at Blackbeard's: The Lighthouse Special.
It didn't take long for Ed to spot Fang carrying the procession of sparklers heading right towards their table. Blackbeard's best bottle of rum in a bucket of ice, on a tray with fancy mixers and glassware blown to look like ocean waves. Inside the glasses were flaming blue shots of rum and blue Curacao. The whole display was lit up by a frankly obscene and possibly dangerous number of sparklers -- sparklers that lit up the room and got the attention of everyone in the bar, even over the pounding music.
Including Vincent and Jack. Vincent settled under the arm of his fiancé at their table, and Jack leaning against the bar with his arms crossed. Both glared daggers, though Vincent at least looked like he was trying to hide it.
Fang was at their table now, setting down the tray of rum and drinks, setting two flaming shots right in front of them.
Ed turned to Stede, who was staring at the whole display with a mixture of awe and delight. He met Ed's eyes, and his face split into an excited grin.
"Do you trust me?" Ed asked over the music. Stede nodded.
Ed matched his grin, then -- in a move that Ed liked to think was very smooth -- using one leather-gloved hand he covered Stede's drink to smother the flame before doing it to his own. He held up his shot glass to Stede. "To revenge?"
Stede tapped his glass against Ed's. "To revenge!" he said with a laugh.
They both tapped their glasses against the table and tossed back their drinks, never breaking eye contact. The sparklers were still going. Everyone was still looking. And the very moment they both set down their glasses again, Ed was holding Stede's face in his hands and descending upon his lips.
At the very first touch of Ed's lips against Stede's, he felt more than heard Stede let out a little gasp. A puff of a surprised breath as electricity sparked between them. And oh, that was something, wasn't it? The way that Stede melted against him, his arms circling Ed's waist.
Stede's lips were soft against Ed's, but he moved them with a firm pressure -- sure, hungry, and almost needy as he licked at the seam of Ed's lips, pressing closer.
Fuck it. Might as well give the people a show, right?
Ed didn't even break the kiss as he shifted, clambering up so his knees were on either side of Stede's thighs, sitting astride his lap, sinking his fingers into soft, honeyed curls. He opened his mouth to Stede, and the other man didn't hesitate to slip his tongue inside, hands finding Ed's waist. Stede pushed back at him with enthusiasm, a small moan escaping him when his tongue brushed over the ball piercing in Ed's tongue. Stede tasted like rum and pineapple and orange and Ed couldn't get enough.
And Ed was a good kisser, he knew that, but never had he been kissed like the other person needed to touch him like they needed the very air to breathe. It was heady, intoxicating, to want and be so wanted in return, and Ed felt like his skin was on fire everywhere Stede touched him.
They grabbed at each other possessively, claiming -- sending anyone who was watching a clear message of mine, mine, mine, as they were lit up like a signal flare.
And Ed shouldn't be so into this. Stede had only agreed to this to get back at each other’s exes. It was just a bit of fuckery. But if this was all he was ever going to get out of Stede, he would sure as hell make the most of it.
***
When attentions had died down and the sparklers had gone out and Ed and Stede had finally managed to tear themselves away from each other for a moment, panting into their shared space, Ed leaned in to speak into Stede's ear again. "That was fuckin' amazing, mate."
"Yeah?" The memory of Ed's mouth still burned his lips, and he rather unconsciously touched a finger to his own lips, as if to verify that the feeling was real.
Ed's eyes seemed to track the movement, breath hitching. "Fuck yeah. Ready to sell it?"
Stede gave him an incredulous look. "You mean to tell me that wasn't selling it?"
Ed laughed. "Just follow my lead, alright?"
Stede looked at him curiously, feeling a bit bereft as Ed stood up from where he'd been perched in Stede's lap. But then Ed held out a hand to him, and something warm stirred in Stede's chest as he took it, palm sliding over softened leather, skimming over smooth skin.
Ed tugged him over to Vincent's VIP table where all of Stede's friends were gathered. Stede watched as Ed plastered on a convincing fake smile, clapping Vincent on the shoulder.
"Stede and I are gonna head out, mate. Just wanted to stop by to say it was nice to finally meet one of Stede's friends," Ed said.
Vincent's smile was thin as he faced them. "You're leaving so soon? But it seemed like you were having so much fun." That seemed pointed in a way that told Stede that Ed's plan had worked exactly as well as he thought, which surprised Stede immensely.
Ed chuckled, tugging Stede closer. "A little too much fun, I think. But hey, we barely touched our bottle. I wanted to give you the rest, on me, as a congrats on your engagement and all that."
Vincent's lips twisted into something that was trying very hard to be a smile and didn't quite manage it. "Wow! Thank you so much. That's so generous of you..." Vincent's eyes flicked towards Stede, feigning concern. He raised and slowed his voice, as though Stede was too inebriated to understand. "Stedey, honey, are you all good to go home with him? I know how you get after a few drinks."
Stede's eye twitched at the insinuation, but he didn't let his own fake smile fall. Instead, he leaned in for the goodbye hug. "I'm all good, Vincent, but I hope you have a wonderful night."
"I know you will, Stede!" Mary whooped from the corner of their booth, giggling. Her husband, Doug, patted her indulgently on the arm, and Stede was glad he was their designated sober driver for the night.
With a final wave goodbye to them all, Ed slung an arm over Stede's shoulders and they started walking towards the exit of Blackbeard's.
"Do you need to say goodbye to Jack?" Stede asked as they wove their way through the crowd, wanting to be sure he held up his end of things.
"Hm? Nah. It'll honestly make him madder to just ignore him," Ed said, flashing Stede a conspiratorial grin that made his knees a bit weak.
They stepped into the cool, empty night air, a drastic change from the pounding music and loud voices and sweaty dancing bodies inside of the bar. It was quiet out here. Most of the businesses that lined the street were dark, and the few people that were out and about looked like they were spilling out of other bars or wandering around trying to find drunk food.
Ed pulled Stede close, wrapping his arms around Stede's neck just outside of the doors to his own bar, just looking at him. And for reasons he couldn't quite explain, Stede suddenly felt naked.
God, how does he do that with his eyes?
One of Ed's hands slipped up to cradle the back of Stede's neck, pulling him close, stopping just before they made contact. His shallow breath ghosted over Stede's lips, and Stede found himself wanting to chase it, but he waited.
"Take me home?" Ed asked, quiet, more unsure of himself than he had been all night.
And how could Stede say anything but yes?