Chapter Text
They’re screaming inside my head, begging, clawing at my face and arms, pulling me into a black puddle of mud; an abyss made out of quicksand.
“GIVE THEM BACK TO ME!”
“GIVE IT TO ME!”
“YOU MURDERER!”
“YOU HEARTLESS DEMON!”
“MY LIFE–”
“MY DREAMS–”
“GIVE THEM BACK!”
My skin is burning. It’s on fire. I’m melting. My entire being is shifting from the inside out. My stomach hurts. Someone, please, make it stop!
“YOU TOOK MY LIFE!”
“I’m sorry…”
“MY FAMILY IS GONE!”
“I didn’t mean to–”
“YOU DESERVE IT!”
“I deserve to perish!” I fall to my knees and fold into myself, gripping my head pressed against the dirt. I can feel it all rising from the soles of my feet, rapidly consuming my legs, my back, my chest, my arms–it’s going to extinguish me whole!
The scream at my throat threatens to escape. I can’t hold it anymore! It’s driving me mad!
"Xiao,” a calm voice calls out. “Xiao.”
It’s…
He pulls my weak body out of the mudd. “Xiao, look at me,” he says with his gentle voice. He covers my ears with both hands and turns my face towards his. After staring directly into my eyes for what feels like a long time, the screaming gradually dissolves, my focus now solely on him. With the same gentleness as his grip, he presses his lips on my forehead, letting them linger like there is nothing more important to take care of. The golden bangs brush against my dark ones the entire time.
When he pulls away, he encloses me within his arms and presses me tightly against his body. He lays his cheek against my hair. “You’re okay, my love,” he whispers. “Just close your eyes.”
I do as he says, and without thinking, I wrap my arms around his back the best I can, pressing myself against him, ignoring the pain. In the middle of it all, I doze off, and my mind shifts into nothingness.
I lift my head from the dirt and slowly sit on the hinds of my legs. My strength is still gone, but my mind is now blank. I lean my head back and inhale deeply. The stench of lingering death doesn’t seem to bother me.
The twilight is seemingly gone now, and the world is falling into darkness once more. But I’m calm and unconcerned about falling into it myself, at least in this moment, because the warm coolness has yet to leave my body.
I brush my fingertips on the spot where he laid his cheek, and I trace them down toward the ends of my bangs. I press the tips against my lips and whisper to myself amidst the silence, “Traveler…”
…
From the Wangshu Inn rooftop, I contemplate the previous occurrence. The sky is dark through my hours of silence.
Why did the Traveler appear in my mind like that? We’ve rarely spoken. Morax or Barbatos; either of them would be understandable, yet I did not hear the flute, nor did Morax save me from self-destructing like he’s done in the past. Still, whatever the reason for it all may be, I acted indecently. It was beyond shameless of me. But mulling over it is a waste of time. Such dread is not for the adepti.
I close my eyes until the sun rises again. And when it does, my work starts once more.
I jump off the roof and land on the balcony edge of the second floor, but on my landing, I meet the eyes of a familiar face just inches away. Gripping the railing is the Traveler in the flesh.
My footing becomes unstable, and I fall momentarily, like my mind and body have both become paralyzed.
“Xiao!” the Traveler yells.
When I snap out of it, I’m in the Traveler’s arms. His face is close. Too close. I can feel it. I can’t move my head.
“Xiao, are you alright???” the floating girl asks.
“Xiao?” the Traveler breathes beside my ear.
I vanish from the spot and land several meters away. Strangely, my breath and heartbeat are unsteady.
“Oh, sorry! Did I scare you?” he asks apologetically.
“I’m fine.” I straighten up. “Why are you here?”
The Traveler crosses his arms and hums. “I…came to see you. To ask how you’re doing. And to catch a break at the inn.” He smiles wryly. His bangs are longer than before.
“Mn. If you’re asking about my karmic debt, there are no changes. It’s bearable.”
“That’s good to hear!” he grins and nods. His lips have a strange tinge of red.
I avert my gaze. “...” I’m unsure of what to say. “Then, enjoy your stay.”
I turn to leave, but the Traveler yells out, “Wait!” I look over my shoulder. “Can we have dinner together?”
“I don’t need to eat.”
“I’ll treat you to some almond tofu, but even if you don’t eat it, just your company is enough.”
“Fine.” I disappear immediately and appear atop a large cliff.
“You’re okay, my love...”
I shake my head.
His hands on my body…
I shake the images from my head. How ridiculous! How shameful!
After a deep breath, I refocus and scout the area. But while on the lookout, I still recall my encounter with the Traveler.
During the physical contact, my internal turmoil that had begun to build up once more throughout the night lessened almost entirely, like the peace from the illusion had returned. That has never occurred before. Could my karmic debt have inflicted itself within the Traveler? I will need to check later.
I spot an accumulation of dark energy below the cliffs. It is attracting hilichurls and abyss mages, and further down the road are humans similarly entranced, heading in the same direction.
Without haste, I drop down the cliff and deal with the threat. Once I rid the area of hilichurls and abyss mages, I return to high altitude and observe the humans as they wake up and find their way home.
I continue cleansing the area surrounding Liyue’s cliffs. By the evening, I’m back at Wangshu Inn. At the balcony of the third floor, I meet the Traveler and the girl who have been waiting.
“Xiao!” Paimon waves. They both walk my way. “Let’s go eat. I’m starving!”
The Traveler and I follow Paimon to an empty, secluded table. The inn’s waiter brings plates of food and freshly brewed tea.
Paimon and the Traveler stare at me. I take the first bite, then they dig in themselves. We eat in silence as I enjoy the tofu. Every minute, however, I can sense the Traveler side-eyeing me. How inconvenient.
I take the cup of tea the Traveler poured for me and take a sip.
“You know what,” the Traveler starts, “I dreamed about you last night.”
The tea cup slips from my fingers. I react quickly so it lands on my palm, but the Traveler does the same, and his hand ends up pressed against the back of mine.
I’m shocked still for a moment. Even my breathing is shallow now. A strange heat is crawling up my face. Why isn’t the Traveler moving his hand? He’s too close… I can’t breathe. His grip tightens.
“Are you alright?” he asks. I don’t know what his expression looks like. “Your face is re–”
I disappear immediately. And now, I’m on the rooftop. I grip the shirt at my chest and gasp for breath. The heat is still on my cheeks and moves to the rest of my body. But it is not a scorching heat. The Traveler’s touch eases my pain, yet overheats me, immobilizes me–renders me weak. I cannot allow for such weakness. It is unsuitable for battle.
“Xiao! Xiao! Are you here?” I hear him from the balcony below my feet. I don’t say anything. Instead, I shift my legs closer to my chest and bury my head in the gap. I don’t move for hours, not until the sun rises again.