Chapter Text
Today is the first day.
With a heart brimming with hope and determination, she mustered the courage to approach him under the front gate of the village. She had even meticulously prepared a lengthy speech that delved into her reasoning, each word chosen with care, in order to convey her resolve and enthusiasm. And yet, to her astonishment, his acceptance of her request came effortlessly.
“If you like…” he had said, an answer so simple and so wholly Sasuke.
Barely able to contain her elation, she hastened her steps to catch up with him and bridge the small gap between them. As their pace quickly fell into place, the backdrop of their village slowly receded into the horizon.
Initially, Sakura had held onto the optimistic belief that the honeymoon phase would extend far into the distance of their journey. But it only took a mere half hour for the realization to strike her. While walking alongside Sasuke used to be a rarity in their history, it would soon no longer be a fleeting occurrence but a new reality that was destined to persist.
The thought caused a sense of trepidation to wash over her. And what began as exhilaration for a new beginning slowly yielded to a subtle undercurrent of unease, causing the fluttering in her stomach to morph into a disconcerting churn.
It was already easy to see how the arm's-length gap she purposefully maintained as they walked side by side demonstrated the emotional distance between them. The air surrounding them was fraught with an awkward stillness, a palpable silence that seemed to accentuate her already-heightened anxiety and consciousness of her decision.
In order to distract herself and lighten the mood, Sakura took it upon herself to fill Sasuke in on all the noteworthy updates of people she thought would interest him. As she did so, her words occasionally stumbled over one another, resulting in endearing stutters and the accidental nips at her own tongue, only for her to promptly cover her gaffe with exaggerated hand gestures.
Sasuke’s comments were sparing and infrequent. But despite rarely contributing to the conversation, his muted engagement spoke volumes. Each subtle upward shift of the corner of his lips to the barely audible exhale of amusement served as a gentle encouragement that spurred Sakura to animatedly recount every minute detail.
She longed for Sasuke to experience a sense of presence, as if he were there to experience every shared moment, as if he had never left. In a way, it was an invitation for him to be an integral part of their collective experiences once more, just as he had extended her the choice to inhabit his world again.
Their journey wasn’t defined by a predetermined endpoint nor constrained by the shackles of time. It was unburdened by any map and guided only by an absence of rigid timelines. But as they became lost in their conversation, the first day of their trip unfolded without carrying them too great a distance from Konoha. It was Sasuke who made the suggestion to stop when the sun dipped below the horizon, its golden rays gradually surrendering to the twilight's embrace.
The pair were no strangers to camping outside by now. It used to be a daunting prospect that they dreaded as genin, but it had become just another routine facet of their lives as seasoned shinobi. Their experience carrying out missions helped them establish their roles quickly and seamlessly on the first night of their trip.
With her mouth delightfully occupied with the food they had brought along from the village, Sakura found herself unable to continue her stories, so they ate in silence. But the backdrop of the night was filled with the rhythmic symphony of crickets and the gentle cracking of the fire nestled between them.
As the dance of flames cast an intimate illumination upon Sasuke's features, Sakura seized the rare opportunity to study Sasuke without his knowledge. She observed with quiet fascination the way he seamlessly melded into the tapestry of the environment before her. But accompanying the initial wonderment was a subtle pang of longing for someone she realized was still so out of reach.
Even when Sasuke was surrounded by his peers and former mentors back in the village, she had never seen him as calm and at ease as he was at this very moment. It made her wonder if Konoha would ever be his home again or if he truly belonged on the route of the endless journey that would continue to keep him so far away from her.
She had selfishly asked to accompany him, but does she still know him as well as she likes to believe she does? He had given her a promise, but what does he really think of her now that his journey of redemption has ended?
Lost in the labyrinth of her own self-doubt and thoughts of uncertainty, Sakura only snapped out of her trance when, out of her peripheral vision, she noticed Sasuke standing up from his seated position on the ground, having already finished his dinner. Looking down at her empty hands, Sakura found she had also absentmindedly eaten all of her food.
"I’m taking the first watch," he informed her, walking toward a large tree that he could rest his aching back against.
It’s so like Sasuke to do that, Sakura thinks.
In the days of Team Seven, Kakashi would always assume the first watch. This left the three of them to negotiate the remaining responsibility by themselves, which often led to quite a bit of arguing and squabbling. Eventually, Sasuke figured Naruto would always be the first one to fall asleep swiftly after dinner and wouldn’t be able to wake up for the third watch, let alone the second.
Similarly, Sakura was prone to fatigue after their demanding mission. She would always be too tired to stay up unless she got at least two-watches of rest beforehand. In other words, she was not any better than Naruto, so Sasuke had begrudgingly resigned himself to taking the second watch.
Remarkably, this familiar rhythm had persisted even in their present circumstances. Despite the passage of time—a span that stretched beyond half a decade—and the absence of their former team members, Sasuke remained steadfast in his adherence to their unofficial tradition.
Maybe he hadn’t changed that much after all.
Sakura wondered, too, if Sasuke still had those fond memories of their genin days like the ones she liked to revisit, whether the fragments of their shared history held the same sentimental weight for him as they did for her.
“Ok, wake me up in a few hours,” she reminded him.
It might be an unnecessary act, yet there used to be moments when Sasuke would allow Sakura a few additional minutes of rest before waking her up for her designated watch if she was particularly tired that day. He would say he lost track of the time, but Sakura knew better. When the world viewed Sasuke as a heartless child with no regard for anyone but himself, Sakura had always seen him as a very caring teammate who didn’t like to take credit for his thoughtful intentions.
As Sakura approached their belongings nearby where Sasuke was sitting, a gentle smile graced her lips. Her gaze was drawn to the sleeping area that had been meticulously arranged when she was gathering sticks and branches for the fire. He was always anticipating their needs, always prepared, and perpetually operating a few steps ahead with his ever-watchful consideration.
The arrangement was simple enough—a small pillow placed atop a neatly rolled-out sleeping mat—that was positioned thankfully quite far from the fire to avoid the encroaching heat that was already very palpable in the air around them.
Today has been particularly sweltering. Not even the lack of sunlight had managed to cool the oppressive air, which was why it puzzled Sakura when she spotted the rolled up blanket resting on the sleeping mat. Wordlessly, she grabbed it, intending to stuff it back in the bag, when Sasuke unexpectedly spoke up.
“You don’t need it?”
Sakura stopped on her tracks. She glanced down at the rolled-up blanket in her hands, a subtle tension threading through her thoughts, but she pushed them away.
There’s no way he knows, does he?
"Oh, it’s kind of hot today," she replied, her tone casual as she sought to divert the conversation.
His question, though innocently framed, sliced through the air with a precision that caught her off guard. "But don’t you still need it to sleep?"
She blanched. He knows.
A nervous laugh escaped Sakura's lips as she waved her hand in front of her in denial.
"I think you’re mistaking me for Naruto," she quipped.
Sasuke shook his head, insisting, "You both do it."
"T-that’s only when I was still young!" She retorted, dropping all pretense of feigned ignorance. "I’m an adult now! I don't need a hugging pillow to sleep!"
Back then, there were a few times Sasuke had questioned her about the makeshift hugging pillow she had fashioned from her blanket during warmer nights, but she had always claimed it was for Naruto and not herself. It was embarrassing to think of how proud she was back then, thinking she had hidden it so well.
The intention behind her actions had remained unchanged since then: to conceal any inkling of perceived childishness from Sasuke's perception. She didn’t want Sasuke to think she couldn’t sleep without something to draw comfort from in her embrace. But it appeared he had seen through her lies then and even now, if his unconvinced expression was anything to go by.
It was such a trivial piece of information that, when it used to come up in conversation, she would always glide past it. When she couldn’t escape the topic, she would playfully tease Naruto for doing the same thing to redirect the focus. She just hoped he didn’t think she was too much of a hypocrite.
"It’s only a blanket.” The calm declaration carried a hint of reassurance that cut through her worries. “You should use it how you want to.”
Promptly, he turned away when he could tell how much his attention was putting her on edge, causing a flicker of gratitude to spark within Sakura.
"R-right."
Despite the persistent warmth that hung in the air, Sakura covered herself from head to toe with the blanket, leaving only a few strands of her signature pink to peek out from under the cover. It was flimsy, but an attempt nonetheless to hide her face from him.
But even as embarrassment tinged her cheeks, a flicker of happiness nestled in her heart. The realization that Sasuke had not only noticed but also remembered her idiosyncrasies from their shared past carried a touch of warmth that she couldn't deny. It really made her wonder how closely he was watching her without her knowledge, and what else he remembered about her. This was only another example of Sasuke’s caring nature that everyone conveniently overlooked.
As the thoughts and memories of their younger selves eventually lured her into slumber, Sasuke's vigilant gaze remained fixed on their surroundings, a realization drifting through his consciousness like a whisper. He didn’t even realize it was even a secret she tried to hide given how obvious it was, particularly during the colder months.
He liked to think he didn’t really care if Sakura needed a hugging pillow or not, yet a part of him still harbored a subtle concern. Without the makeshift pillow, it was not as if Sakura would lose the urge to hug something to sleep. In reality, she would just be hugging something else, or someone else.
The frustrating thing was that even when Kakashi was on the first watch and the three of them were lying next to each other, Sakura would turn the other way to hug Naruto. Sasuke didn’t understand his vexation then, but he does a little bit now. He would try to break them up, doing so discreetly to hide from the prying eyes of their nosy sensei, but then Sakura would turn and hug him instead.
He could still remember the weight of her arm slung over his rapid heart, her soft breath fanning his blushing cheeks, and her flowery scent that permeated the breath that he had held. Yet, amidst these cherished recollections, another figure emerged—Kakashi, with his mischievous glint as he witnessed the scene.
That man was the only one who knew why Sasuke was not well rested on some nights. One of the reasons that man has lived to be this old is because he has wisely chosen to keep quiet about it all these years.
Catching Sakura’s sudden movement, Sasuke shifted his gaze towards her, and the scene he found coaxed a subtle curve onto his lips. She could deny it all she wanted, but when her stubborn ego wasn't getting in the way of her comfort, when her inhibitions had melted away, the blanket that had concealed her earlier had been kicked aside and bundled up to be hugged. His gaze lingered on her unguarded expression, watching as she nuzzled her face into the blanket, causing her puffy cheek to squish against the fuzzy fabric.
"Cute."
He froze the moment that word left his mouth in a whisper—a fragment of his thoughts that had slipped into the hushed night air—expecting a reaction from Sakura. He held his breath, his focus locked on her, but when all he received was the soft cadence of her breathing, Sasuke allowed himself to exhale.
Similar to the soothing touch of a gentle breeze on a day as warm as today, a sense of relief washed over Sasuke when he realized that some things remained unchanged about Sakura. She was still the heavier sleeper in the team, just after Naruto, and still the chattier one between the two of them. In some aspects, especially regarding her, Sasuke assumed he hadn’t changed that much either.
After years of traveling to redeem himself, he had come across so many places he had promised himself to share with someone but never could at that moment. Now, the prospect of revisiting those places, not for his own sake but to witness Sakura's genuine reactions, ignited a spark of anticipation within him.
He thought it would take a while to get used to the thought, but it hit him half an hour after they left the village that this wasn’t just his journey anymore; it was theirs. And what began as anxiety over the sudden change in his life has blossomed into excitement for what is to come, as they will soon face tomorrow together.