Chapter Text
D E F E A T
“Well!” Felix stretches his arms above his head and feels the pressure in his spine ease up. “Third loss in a row; maybe Harbor just isn’t the agent for me. Fun games though, huh? Definitely worth the negative RR.”
In the time it takes for him to suck down a mouthful of water, his chat floods with another hundred messages. Felix looks over at the monitor and scans through them, nodding his agreement at all the suggestions that he should just go back to playing mind games with Yoru.
“Play style mismatch,” he concedes. “Might give him another shot in the future but…maybe not when I’m trying to climb.”
A glance at the corner of his screen tells him that he’s been streaming for close to twelve hours. Any other day and he’d stay online for a little while longer, but he’s got a couple of meetings tomorrow that he cannot miss.
“That was probably my last game, guys. Gotta get up a little earlier than usual tomorrow.”
He pulls up his friends list and is surprised to see that none of his streamer friends are online.
“No one’s online, so you all know what that means.”
From the corner of his eye, he sees stranger raid!!!!! fill his chat. Raiding is one of Felix’s favourite ways to support the community. Sure, he could gift subs, but he feels that introducing his viewers to another streamer and having them willingly subscribe of their own accord is more meaningful in the long run.
He’ll typically raid his friends, but on occasions where none of them are online or when it's been a while since the last time, he’ll raid a stranger. Felix knows just how it feels to receive that kind of support, so he’ll never hold back from giving it.
“What category shall we do today? Something we haven’t picked in a while.”
rainsoughtsmile: league
kathlvshf: apex!!!
jinnie_y0: apex it’s been so long
SheyroFishCake: tetris :monkaS:
“What do you mean it’s been so long since Apex?” Felix laughs. “It’s been two days! And let’s not talk about Tetris.”
Paragoddess12: art?
“Art? Yeah, that’s a good one, we could do art.”
Felix loads up the art category and scrolls through the list of live channels, eyes darting around the screen as he looks for a streamer to raid. On the second page, a thumbnail nestled in the middle catches his attention.
The stream’s title reads: [ASMR] Watercolours :)
A pair of hands, stained with paint and cradling a thin brush between slender fingers. Those hands, somehow masculine and feminine at the same time, are painting what looks to be flowers, and the colours are so appealing that Felix doesn’t hesitate to click into the stream.
The first thing he hears is the soft sweep of a brush against canvas. Then he registers music playing faintly in the background and a few candles flickering in a corner, and Felix imagines that the room must smell like lit matches and fresh linen.
As he watches, what is unmistakably a petal forms on the canvas, blue bleeding from the tip of the brush onto a background of stormy grey. Another petal soon follows, and when the brush finally moves out of frame, it leaves behind a beautiful, if melancholic, bloom in its wake.
For a minute or two, Felix forgets that he’s live streaming himself watching a stranger’s stream. Then the audio alert for a new subscriber sounds in his ears and Felix nearly falls off his seat.
acertainsome2: whats happening i just got here
greekgods_hf: earth to felix
Laspri_Kr: why are you blushing
“I’m not,” Felix begins, but the artist speaks right then and there and prevents him from defending himself.
"There's an art exhibit on the weekend. It’s all about colours and forms, which is really up my alley nowadays. I want to go, but I’m not sure if I’ll have the time.”
Oh wow, that voice could soothe him into a dreamless sleep. The music has stopped now, and Felix guesses it must be so that the artist can speak (or rather, whisper) without overwhelming his viewers.
Without a second thought, Felix moves to his chatbox and types /raid arosegarden
Almost immediately, the words snipurr is raiding with a party of 10832 pops up on the artist’s stream, accompanied by a burst of pixelated petals. As if on cue, Felix’s viewers start spamming the artist’s chat with FELIX RAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, and for a long time, all Felix sees is his name over and over again.
Then the camera moves away from the half-completed painting and a face swims into view.
Felix feels his eyes widen.
This is the most ethereal person he's ever laid eyes on.
Laspri_Kr: ok you’re definitely blushing now
yongbussy: lmaooo look at felix’s face
silviana_stay: :pepelaugh:
kentamas: ok but can u blame him?? this guy is gorg
rainsoughtsmile: been watching felix for a few years and i’ve never seen him look like this
“Wow, um. Felix?”
Good heavens, he’s still whispering. He’s whispering Felix’s name.
“Thank you for the raid.”
Felix’s fingers fly over the keyboard.
snipurr: you’re welcome!
snipurr: you’re a great artist :)
Then, for the first time since he became a full-time streamer, Felix ends his stream without saying goodbye to his viewers.
Felix ends up sleeping past his alarm, which means his entire morning devolves into a mad rush from one place to another. It appears that he needed a reminder to not schedule meetings back to back, and it appears that he was very kindly given one.
He has always preferred being an independent streamer. Having the freedom to do what he wants has kept him from signing one of the many offers that have come across his table, but the downside to having this freedom is needing to shoulder the weight of his schedule by himself.
It’s nearly two in the afternoon, and Felix is finally sitting down for a hot meal.
Jisung (sans his camera, for once) is keeping him company. The YouTuber is going on about an argument between a cheating husband and his wife that he’d witnessed the night before, and Felix is more than happy to let the sound of his friend’s voice wash over him as he eats.
“The mistress popped out of nowhere,” Jisung exclaims, reaching over to steal a fry off Felix’s plate. He dunks it into a pot of sriracha mayo and pops the whole fry into his mouth. “And the wife brought reinforcements. The brawl that followed was Oscar-worthy, honestly.”
“Did you vlog it?”
“Of course not, what kind of person do you think I am?”
“Well, let’s just say I’m not used to the fact that you’re not filming me right now.”
Jisung pouts at his friend and steals another fry.
Grinning, Felix pushes his plate over to Jisung. “You can have the rest. I am going to sit back and try not to slip into a food coma.”
The gift of fries mollifies Jisung, like Felix knew it would.
He opens Twitter and sips at his overly sweet caramel frappuccino as he scrolls through the hundreds of notifications he has, most of them likes for his most recent tweet – a selfie. Just as he’s about to close the application, he spots a tweet that almost has him choking on his drink.
lilith @noisehues • 8h
hey @snipurr95 just in case ur wondering, his name is hyunjin (@/hwang_hj)and he’s been doing art for a long time. he also dances, he has a dog that he pampers, and he likes photography. he laughs at the LAMEST jokes, and he has really cute dimples!
lilith @noisehues • 8h
Replying to @noisehues and @snipurr95
oh yeah, he’s currently single and he’s talked briefly about ex boyfriends before, soooooooooo
Felix stares at his screen, first at the screenshot then at the tweets until every word is burned into his brain. Face hot, he likes both tweets and quickly drops his phone onto the table, where it lands with a loud thud.
“Jesus,” Jisung barks. He sets a hand over his heart. “Warn a man!”
“Sorry.”
Jisung squints suspiciously at him and Felix braces himself for an impromptu interrogation, but it seems like the gods are on his side today, for Jisung simply shrugs and returns to his fries.
Hours later, when Felix is safe in the solitude of his own room, he loads Twitter once more and types hwang_hj into the search bar.
He spends way too much time scrolling through Hyunjin’s profile, and every time he scrolls past a selfie or a photo of his artwork, Felix has to fight back the itch to tap on that damned heart. Thanks to some newfound iron will, he does manage to restrain himself from liking any of Hyunjin’s tweets, although he fails to stop mental images of Hyunjin’s face from surfacing in his mind’s eye.
Needing to do something to distract himself, Felix hops online and sends out a tweet.
Felix! @snipurr95 • now
surprise stream! twitch.tv/snipurr
With his packed morning schedule, he’d originally planned to take the rest of the day off streaming, but streaming also happens to be the most effective way to keep himself occupied.
Once the tweet is published and his followers start to react, he slinks over to his mirror and checks to make sure he doesn’t look terrible – who knows who will be watching, right?
Then he’s back at his desk and loading up all the necessary software, letting his Starting Soon! screen play for a few minutes while he preps himself for some good gaming. His chat is already getting active, loyal viewers greeting each other and chatting about their days as they wait for Felix to appear.
Headphones snug over his ears, Felix switches on his mic and replaces the Starting Soon! screen with his live camera feed and main screen.
“Hello! I know it’s sudden and it’s kinda late, but hey, I wanted to play Valo and I love you guys’ company, so here I am.” He smiles at the influx of greetings in his chat and laces his fingers together. A push outwards and all of his knuckles pop satisfyingly. “Let’s earn back some RR, what do you say?”
He’s making progress on his goal for the night when he sees his chat moving at an alarming speed. Elbow-deep in a 1-v-2, Felix can’t exactly check on what’s being said, and he keeps his focus on the game until he manages to kill both enemies with a well-aimed molly.
Round over, he’s got a handful of seconds to read his chat before the next round begins.
1soul_gone: felix!!!! he’s watching!!
piratemaps: say hi to the cute artist, felix
maf42: is it just me or do i sense something in the air
fluffy_bbokie: oh ho hoho it’s not just you
“Cute artist?” Felix, slightly preoccupied with buying what he needs for the next round, takes a tad too long to put the pieces together. “Art – Hyunjin is here?”
As soon as Hyunjin’s name leaves his lips, Felix sees the words arosegarden has gifted 100 subs! dancing across the top of his screen.
Felix’s jaw drops. The timer signalling the start of the next round ticks down to zero, but Felix doesn’t care, not right now.
“What – oh my god, Hyunjin?”
arosegarden: hi felix :)
“Yeah, hi, Hyunjin, what the hell? A hundred subs? Is this because I raided you yesterday? You didn’t have to!”
In the back of his mind, he registers his teammates asking if he’s there. One of them sounds exceptionally distraught.
arosegarden: your raid got me a lot more than 100 new subs, so it's really nothing
arosegarden: please accept the subs!!
onlyjjoknyangz: they’re interacting this is so cute help
arosegarden: felix, i think your teammates need you
hjnbokkie: LMAO
Felix coughs, unmutes his mic to utter a distracted, “Uh, sorry, had a brief emergency,” and proceeds to die at the hands of the enemy Raze.
“Well,” Felix says. He hopes he isn’t too red. “Thank you for the gift subs, Hyunjin.”
arosegarden: my pleasure (:
arosegarden: i hope you win the game
The next round starts and Felix peels his gaze away from his chat. If Hyunjin is watching and cheering him on, then he’d better play extra well.
And he does, wrapping up the last round with a solid four kills.
V I C T O R Y dances across his screen and Felix looks back at his chat just in time to see:
arosegarden: :pog:
He laughs.
Hyunjin hangs around for a little while, chatting to Felix’s viewers while Felix waits in queue for his next game. During this brief lull, Felix takes the opportunity to pull up Hyunjin’s stream on a separate screen – to Felix’s surprise, the artist isn’t currently streaming.
Before his brain can catch up with his mouth, he’s already blurting out, “You’re not streaming?”
arosegarden: did you check hehe
kathlvshf : i am holleRING
arosegarden: i only stream on saturdays
arosegarden: check back on the weekend~
myhyunsi: add a reminder to your calender, felix
Maybe he will.
“So you’re just…watching my stream?”
arosegarden: yes, can i?
Felix’s face feels so warm.
“Of course. I hope I’m not boring you, though. Not sure if you’re into gaming?”
arosegarden: i game!
arosegarden: …somewhat
onlyjjoknyangz: felix you should show him your guinea pig
noisehues: future valo duo?
arosegarden: you have a guinea pig?
The chat floods with variations of YES, so Felix cancels the queue before he gets up and goes to fetch Stacey from her cage. During his brief absence, Hyunjin and his viewers continue chatting.
arosegarden: and i’m a valo noob, so unless you have a silver ranked smurf account…
noisehues: oh he has many smurf accounts, don’t worry
rainsoughtsmile: he’ll def duo with you even if it’s your first time touching valo
suntrauberry: we’ll make sure he duos with you
Meanwhile, Felix jogs into the kitchen and beelines for the laundry room, where Stacey’s living quarters are set up alongside their washer and dryer. Seungmin, set up at the bar counter with two laptops and a portable microphone, looks on as Felix tries his best to coax her out of her house.
“Didn’t you just start streaming?”
“Mhm, but chat wants me to show Hyunjin the wonder that is Stacey.”
“And who is this Hyunjin?”
Felix manages to get his hands around Stacey’s rotund stomach and lifts her out of the cage. She stares at him with her little beady eyes, and Felix can feel the waves of displeasure radiating off her at being woken up from a nap. As a truce, he grabs a bag of her favourite treats.
“He’s a fellow streamer,” Felix answers. “We, uh, recently connected.”
Seungmin raises his brows. “Connected?”
“I raided him, he gave me a hundred gift subs, you know how it goes.”
“I actually don’t really know how that goes.”
With a shrug, Felix readjusts his hold on Stacey and her snacks. “We’ve been living together for two years, I’m pretty sure you do.”
Then he speedwalks out of the kitchen, pointedly ignoring the look that Seungmin is levelling onto his retreating back.
Back in his room, Felix sets both guinea pig and her snacks down onto the table. The headphones go back on and a brief glance at his chat shows a bunch of STACEY <3333-esque messages.
“Hold on, let me set up a second cam so you guys can see her on the table.”
A couple of minutes later, Stacey’s oblong body fills up the main screen on his stream.
“Here she is! Stacey, in all her glory.”
arosegarden: oh my god
jinnie_y0: so chonky i love her
arosegarden: why did you name her stacey?
“My younger sister named her,” Felix says. As he talks, Stacey finishes her treat and looks up at him, clearly expecting more. She’s supposed to be on a diet, but Felix has always been a sucker for spoiling her, so he dips back into the bag and retrieves another. “She wanted to give her a human name and thought that she looked like a Stacey.”
arosegarden: so cute
arosegarden: can you hold her up to your face?
arosegarden: switch cams :)
1soul_gone: omo what’s happening
piratemaps: :AYAYA:
“Up to my face?”
Felix follows Hyunjin’s request, switching cameras and lifting Stacey up until they’re cheek to cheek. She’s still munching away, a cute bundle of fur that Felix cannot help but kiss her on the top of her furry little head.
suntrauberry: so cute wtf
acertainsome2: y’all look alike
arosegarden: adorable
arosegarden: thank you for indulging me
arosegarden: give her another treat on my behalf?
“She’s supposed to be on a diet,” Felix laughs, setting her down and reaching for the bag of treats. “This is against her vet’s orders, I’ll have you know.”
He gives her another treat anyway, and someone donates a thousand bits just to send the following message:
If Hyunjin met Stacey in real life, do you think she’ll like him more?
“Probably. The way to her heart is definitely through her stomach. And thank you for the donation!”
arosegarden: if it’s any consolation, my dog likes my friends better than he likes me
arosegarden: and i’m the one who feeds him and picks up his poop
greekgods_hf: :OMEGALUL:
SheyroFishCake: :FeelsBadMan:
Felix knows that Hyunjin’s talking about Kkami. He’s seen pictures of the little chihuahua on Hyunjin’s page.
“We could swap pets.”
arosegarden: hahaha yeah, we could
arosegarden: anyway, as much as i’d love to hang out for a bit longer, i have to get going
arosegarden: see you around, felix! bye stacey <3 bye felix’s chat!
Disappointment pings in Felix’s gut, immediate and unexpected. He joins the rest of his viewers in bidding Hyunjin goodbye and tries not to think about it, but ultimately accepts that he’d failed.
“Well,” Felix says. Streaming is the best way to keep his brain occupied, he reminds himself. “Back to Valo, then? I’ll let Stacey hang out here, it’s been a while since we had a Stacey Cam day, huh?”
“So,” Seungmin says. It’s Tuesday, and every Tuesday they make it a point to have brunch together at the café around the corner from their apartment. “I see you’ve gone viral again.”
Felix blinks. Viral? His confusion must show on his face, because Seungmin rolls his eyes and comments, “For someone who relies on social media for work, you really should use it more. Check your Twitter.”
Mouth filled with pancakes, Felix digs around in his pockets for his phone. Ever since his Twitch career took off, he’s turned notifications off for everyone except the people he follows (friends, family, and sponsors) to keep some semblance of peace on his screen.
And even so, sometimes he doesn’t even bother to look through the notifications he does get. There are just far too many!
Loading Twitter, the first thing he sees is Jeongin’s latest tweet announcing a new GRWM video on his channel. He retweets it and taps on the notification tab.
Well, something has happened alright. He sees a whole lot of replies interspersed amongst a flood of retweets and likes, and it doesn’t take him very long to pinpoint the reason behind this spike in activity.
hyun followed you
hyun tagged you in a photo
The photo in mention is of a sketch. More specifically, a sketch of him and Stacey. Hyunjin had drawn them together, all soft lines and shadows, and Felix marvels at how Hyunjin was able to capture the sprinkle of his freckles and the little white spot on Stacey's chest.
Hyunjin tweeted it a few hours ago (when Felix was still asleep and drooling onto his pillow), and it has amassed an astonishing 12k retweets since then, a number that will only swell as the day goes on.
Felix saves the photo and sets it as his phone’s wallpaper.
Felix! @snipurr95 • now
Replying to @hwang_hj
oh my god??? this is so cute i love this so much 🥺
In a second tweet, he attaches a screenshot of his home screen.
Felix! @snipurr95 • now
Replying to @hwang_hj
looks good as a wallpaper too hehe
He follows Hyunjin back and looks up from his phone to see Seungmin scrutinising him.
“What?”
Seungmin purses his lips in thought.
“I think,” he begins. “That you have a crush.”
Felix splutters. “Crush?” His voice pitches higher. “What do you mean, crush? I don’t have a crush.”
“You should’ve seen your face half a minute ago. You were smiling like an idiot.” Seungmin grins, clearly entertained by it all. “Damn, it’s been a while since you’ve had a crush, huh? Was this a Crush At First Sight situation?”
There really is no way for Felix to end this conversation without giving Seungmin the answers he seeks.
“He’s really talented,” Felix mumbles. “And he seems nice.”
“And?”
“…And he’s really cute,” Felix sighs, resigned. “But shut up, it’s not a crush.”
His phone pings with a few notifications in a row, and Felix sees that it’s Hyunjin. He’d retweeted both of Felix’s tweets, but Felix barely spares those notifications a second glance. What he’s really interested in is the direct message sitting pretty in his inbox, waiting to claim his attention.
“Is that him?”
“Shut up,” Felix repeats, and Seungmin cackles.
He’d love to reply to Hyunjin now, but he’ll put it off until later just to spare himself more ribbing from his friend.
A Discord notification cuts him off mid-sentence and Felix switches applications to see a message from Hyunjin, informing him that he’s here and will be joining the call soon.
“Oh, our guest of honour is here!”
They’ve been texting for the past couple of days, and Felix has learned that while Hyunjin does spend most of his time creating art, he also plays games from time to time. He isn’t an expert by any means (“I’m really good at Fruit Ninja, does that count?”), but he has enough experience to avoid being classed as a beginner.
“Today,” Felix declares, “we’re gonna play some good ol’ League of Legends.”
His chat explodes, half of his viewers excited about Felix’s return to the game that formed the building blocks of his successful streaming career, and the other half bemoaning the lack of FPS gameplay for the day.
“Guys, I’ve been playing Valo and Apex every day for months, I think you’ll survive if I play League for one day.”
On the bright side, everyone seems to be happy that Hyunjin’s back. Felix didn’t mention him by name, but it apparently isn’t a hard riddle to solve.
“Hi Felix, hi chat.”
Hyunjin’s voice is as clear as day – he must have invested a good amount of money into his microphone, a decision no doubt justified by the number of ASMR streams he does.
(Yes, Felix might have gone and watched some of Hyunjin’s VODs, sue him. He appreciates good ASMR, alright?)
“Hi,” Felix says. He takes a peek at his own facecam and hopes he doesn’t look too excited. Meanwhile, his chat overflows with an abundance of greetings for Hyunjin. “Are you ready to carry me?”
Hyunjin laughs, a burst of sound that sends tingles to Felix’s fingertips. “In game, I feel like you’d be the one carrying me.”
kentamas: IN GAME? so out of game he would carry you?
hjnbokkie: princess carry juseyooooo
myhyunsi: idk if it’s just me, but this stream just started and it feels like it’d be legendary
“I haven’t played League in a hot minute,” Hyunjin says. “I don’t have a good feeling about this.”
He accepts the party invite that Felix sends out, and Felix starts the queue before Hyunjin can do something outrageous, like decide not to play anymore. Blessedly, they don’t have to wait long before they’re in champion select, which means Hyunjin really can’t back out now unless he wants to lose LP.
“What should I play?”
They’re duo bot lane, Hyunjin playing Support while Felix shoulders the miserable responsibilities of an ADC. Felix is just about to tell Hyunjin that he can play whatever he wants when he sees what his chat is saying.
Xayah and Rakan?
He flushes to the tips of his ears and makes sure his Discord is on mute before he hisses, “No, chat! Don’t be ridiculous.”
“I think I’ll play Karma,” Hyunjin muses, oblivious. “Are her shields still stupidly strong?”
“Karma’s good,” Felix hastens to say. He glares into the camera as a warning, but he knows his viewers probably won’t care in the slightest.
After all, they love seeing him squirm.
At first glance, Hyunjin gives off such an elegant, poetic aesthetic, but Felix has been gifted with the knowledge that there is a whole ‘nother side to him. They’re barely ten minutes into the game and all of Hyunjin’s gracefulness has vanished in a cloud of smoke.
Hyunjin’s shrieks ring loud in his ears and Felix is halfway to crying with laughter. On screen, Karma is running in circles, throwing skills out left and right until cooldowns limit her, at which point she runs into Felix’s champion and pings for help.
“Just,” Felix wheezes, “just stay behind me and keep me alive. I can get a double here, but you need to stop making me laugh or that’s not gonna happen.”
Hyunjin lets out a garbled string of sounds.
“Felix, I swear, I used to be somewhat decent at this game.”
He sounds like he’s pouting and Felix wishes he could see it with his own two eyes.
“I believe you,” he says. He really does! “Just shield me, okay? Next time they miss their stun, I’m going in.”
By pure luck alone, Felix does manage to get his double. He also manages to guide a chaotic Hyunjin into helping him win the lane, after which he manages to guide a chaotic Hyunjin into helping him win the game.
“That was immensely stressful,” Hyunjin deadpans as soon as the game ends. “Is there a less stressful game that we can play together? Like Animal Crossing? Or Tic-tac-toe?”
Felix laughs, a full-bellied one that has his eyes scrunching up.
“Aw, but I had so much fun!”
“You did?” Hyunjin sighs, but it sounds more teasing than anything else. “Well, I suppose I can find the inner strength for another game.”
And so Felix enters them into the queue for a second game.
rainsoughtsmile: this is like the purest form of flirting i’ve ever seen
1soul_gone: can we have more hyunjin streams please
anna_chxse: if felix joins hyunjin for an art stream in the future i’ll scream
Leaning back in his chair, Felix sips at his energy drink and scans through his chat.
“Chat wants us to do an art stream someday. Oh, we can play Pictionary!”
“That sounds fun. You draw, I guess?”
“I think the other way around would be cheating,” Felix points out, “unless I was blindfolded or something.”
“Speaking of drawing, can I send you something?”
Curiosity piqued, Felix gives Hyunjin permission. Within seconds, Discord lets out a trill and Felix switches over to the application to see that Hyunjin has sent him a file.
He opens it to see a cute little chibi sketch, all big cartoon eyes and a rosebud mouth.
“Is this me?”
“Mhm,” Hyunjin says. “Drew it on my way to class today; made the journey much more bearable. Do you like it?”
maf42: does felix like it ksdhfgkjsdf :peepoLove:
acertainsome2: nahhh this is the second felix drawing in like, a week
SheyroFishCake: a felix chibi :FeelsStrongMan:
yongbussy: where can i find a guy who will draw me bc it’ll make his commute more bearable?
“It’s adorable. Three freckles per cheek?”
Hyunjin chuckles. “I can draw more freckles next time.”
“Next time?”
“Yeah, I like drawing you. You have a very drawable face.”
“A drawable face? Is that a good thing?”
“It’s a great thing. Everything flows, everything is balanced. It’s nice.”
“It’s nice?”
Felix is very aware that he bears a striking resemblance to a parrot right now, but can anyone blame him? He’s got a cute artist telling him that he has a nice, drawable face!
“Yeah, Felix. It’s nice.”
Before he can echo Hyunjin’s words for what seems to be the nth time, the queue pops and they’re tossed into Champion Select once more. With the image of his chibi counterpart still floating around in his mind’s eye, Felix carelessly chooses a random champion.
He can play pretty much any champion, so a random pick isn’t the problem.
What is the problem is the fact that he’d picked Xayah.
“Oh, does this mean I have to play Rakan? Y’know, I’m actually pretty decent with him.”
“Wh– No, oh my god. No, you don’t have to play Rakan just because I chose Xayah –”
“Of course I have to play Rakan, we can’t split the couple up!”
noisehues: there’s absolutely no way we’re not part of some romance film rn
onlyjjoknyangz: maybe they’re doing this on purpose
Laspri_Kr: how come every time i tune in to your stream you’re blushing?
For a split second, Felix wonders if he really is unknowingly starring in some romance film.
It’s late, and while Felix is physically exhausted, he doesn’t think he’ll be able to sleep for a while yet. Sleep will come after his mind runs out of adrenaline.
He’d spent most of his day out with Jeongin as his plus one for an event, a couture boutique launch that boasts fashion Felix isn’t quite sure he could pull off. Jeongin, on the other hand, is made for these one-of-a-kind pieces, and Felix had a wonderful time taking dozens of photos of his model friend.
Receiving the invite was unexpected, to say the least, but there was no way in hell Felix would pass up on the chance to spend the day with Jeongin.
They’d connected years ago through Jisung, and Jeongin has since become one of Felix’s closest friends in the industry. But due to the nature of their jobs – Felix rarely travelling while Jeongin is always abroad –, they don’t often have the time to hang out.
“Hey,” Seungmin says when Felix enters, eyes glued to the screen of Chan’s laptop. “How was playing dress up with your favourite influencer?”
“Don’t say that around Jisung, he’ll get jealous. Honestly, it was pretty great. They gave me a goodie bag; I think you’ll like the stuff inside. Hey, Chan.”
Chan, his childhood friend and a treasured person in his life, waves at him from where he’s perched at the counter across from Seungmin.
“Heya. There’s food in the fridge if you’re hungry, Minho sent me here with way too much food for Seungmin and I to finish.”
Felix perks up at the mention of Minho’s cooking.
“Don’t mind if I do.”
While he waits for his food to heat up, Felix slinks over to the singer-songwriter duo and peers over Chan’s shoulder at his screen.
“How’s it going? How many new songs have you added to your arsenal?”
“Today, none.” Chan grins and shrugs his shoulders. “We’ve been experimenting with a lot of new sounds lately, so nothing’s close to being completed. It’s fun though!”
“Is it?” Seungmin asks dryly. He gets a wadded-up tissue to the face for his quip, but they all know he doesn’t really mean it.
Later, just as Felix is about to swallow a mouthful of stew, Chan says, “So I heard you’ve got a new man in your life.”
Felix chokes on his own spit and proceeds to cough up a lung, tears pooling in the corners of his eyes. He drops his spoon and points an accusatory finger at Seungmin, who smiles sweetly at him in return.
“You don’t understand how fun it is to gossip about you,” Seungmin says, all serious. “As a friend, you should be letting me enjoy life.”
“I’m not,” Felix wheezes, “saying you can’t, but at least don’t over-exaggerate things!”
The corners of Seungmin’s mouth turn downwards. “I dunno, is it really over-exaggerating when you’re basically the only thing he’s been drawing since you guys started talking?”
“That is exaggerating!”
Chan sticks a hand between their faces and waves it up and down, effectively putting a stop to their bickering. Bless him, Felix thinks. Chan has always been on his side ever since they were toddlers throwing sand in the sand pit, and –
“Can I see these drawings?”
Felix groans.
Chan’s BF [17:21:39]: 
Chan’s BF [17:21:46]: ur welcome
What the fuck?
Me [17:22:14]: wtf
Me [17:22:16]: how
Me [17:22:18]: why
Chan’s BF [17:22:32]: chan told me about ur crush
Chan’s BF [17:22:49]: and surprise! hj takes classes at the studio i teach at
Chan’s BF [17:23:11]: wanna subscribe to weekly sweaty hj pics?
Chan’s BF [17:23:27]: reply YES to subscribe; charges apply
Me [17:23:35]: omg stfu
Me [17:23:44]: stop gossiping about me!!
It takes an embarrassingly long time before Felix puts two and two together.
If Hyunjin goes to the same studio that Minho works at, doesn’t that mean they’re living in the same city? Has Hyunjin already told him this? Was he not paying attention? Felix knows for a fact that none of Hyunjin’s social media accounts lists his location, but he can’t for the life of him remember if Hyunjin has ever mentioned where he lives.
This changes everything. Felix has never been fond of the idea of long-distance relationships. It’s why his last relationship was years ago – when his high school boyfriend opted to move to another country for university, Felix endured months of long-distance before he admitted to himself that it wasn’t for him.
So this? Knowing that Hyunjin’s breathing the same polluted city air as him? It’s a game-changer.
Not that it matters, of course. It’s all hypothetical. He doesn’t have a crush!
(Two hours later, Felix gets a notification on Instagram from Minho.
minho_leeeee:
Sent a profile: hhjdanceminho_leeeee:
enjoy!! and fyi, my subscription offer expires in 22 hours
Felix watches every single video. In his defence, there aren’t many to begin with, but that also means he rewatches most of them as well. Hyunjin is a phenomenal dancer, a perfect blend of power, musicality, and sensuality.
The man lives and breathes art in all its forms, and it leaves Felix in awe.
He also chooses not to reply to Minho at all, damn that man!)
Days turn into weeks, and smack dab in the middle of one of those weeks, Felix finally admits to himself that he does have a crush. A gigantic crush the size of Jupiter and its moons combined.
Between playing games together, Hyunjin’s attempts in helping Felix improve his (abysmal) art skills, and the flood of messages they’ve been sending each other on a daily basis, Felix has come to the conclusion that the man is impossibly ideal in every way.
The guy cries while watching romance films, for god’s sake. He pens poems that pair thematically with every painting he creates! He pulls at every single one of Felix’s heartstrings and Felix is left flailing like a fool in his wake.
(The day after he came to terms with his own feelings, Felix climbed into Seungmin’s bed and let out one long, heavy sigh. Seungmin, half-asleep and mildly cranky, spared him a glance before he rolled his eyes up to the ceiling.
“I do not want to hear anything about Hyunjin until I am fully awake, fed, and caffeinated.”
In an act of petty revenge, Felix wrapped all four limbs around Seungmin and squeezed.)
Today is Saturday, and it’s the first Saturday since Felix gave in to the weight of his crush.
Felix is in queue for a new Apex game when he sees a notification pop up on his second monitor. It’s Twitch, letting him know that Hyunjin has just started his stream. As if on cue, his Discord rings.
It’s a new tradition of sorts, keeping each other company on their Saturday streams.
Hyunjin was the one who initiated it, randomly calling Felix a couple of hours into one of his streams. He claimed he wanted opinions for his sketch, but they ended up talking for hours until Hyunjin decided to call it a night. They did the same thing the following week, then the next, and Felix now subconsciously links Saturdays with Hyunjin.
“Hi, how was your day?”
fluffy_bbokie: i love saturdays :’)
suntrauberry: the first thing hyun does is call felix?? i swear to god
kentamas: start stream, call bae
silviana_stay: man’s got his priorities in order
“Exhausting,” Hyunjin replies. There’s a flurry of sounds and Felix looks over at Hyunjin’s stream to see the artist wrestling with an easel. “Spent a couple of hours helping out a friend clean a kindergarten classroom, then spent another few hours in the dance studio. My legs feel noodly.”
“I’m sorry, did you say you cleaned a classroom?”
Hyunjin laughs. “My friend is a kindergarten teacher. His kids love him because he’s just as enthusiastic as they are about making messes, but he’s not very good at cleaning them up. So I help him out from time to time, and in return, he buys Kkami a lot of toys.”
“You’re literally breaking your back to get Kkami new toys and he still doesn’t love you?”
“I know, right? He’s so ungrateful sometimes.”
Conversation trickles to a stop for a while – Felix focuses on his game and Hyunjin spends a good amount of time hunting for a specific set of paints, but eventually, Hyunjin unmutes himself and speaks.
“And how was your day?”
“Busy; Seungmin sent me to run errands, and I spent an unreasonable amount of time looking for his favourite cookies. Then I had a long meeting for that keyboard collaboration I’ve been talking about, but at least that was productive.”
“Are you finalising the design for your keyboard?”
“Yeah, we just have to decide on a colour palette. I think what we have now already looks really pretty.”
“You helped design it, so I’m sure it is.”
Felix’s brain screams, HE’S SO SWEET, and he has to remind himself that he has an image to maintain, lest he completely destroys it in the following seconds.
“Thanks,” he croaks, and pretends he doesn’t see Hyunjin chuckling to himself in the corner of his eye.
“So,” Hyunjin says after a beat. “I found out that we have a mutual friend.”
Felix misses a shot and nearly dies for his mistake. He finds a safe place to recharge his shields and gather up his haphazard thoughts.
“Oh, Minho? You know, I’m not sure if I’d consider him a friend.”
(Even without Felix replying YES, Minho has been very consistent in sending Felix sweaty photos of Hyunjin. Some are blurry and some are taken from the weirdest angles, but Minho is clearly enjoying his new job.
Most of the time, Felix doesn’t even bother giving Minho the satisfaction of a reply. He does save his fair share of photos though.)
“Why didn’t you tell me that we share a mutual friend? Or acquaintance, if you prefer that categorisation.”
“I didn’t know if you wanted to keep your location private,” Felix admits. He pings a spot on his map and sprints towards that direction. “I know quite a few streamers want to keep their online and offline lives separate, and since we never brought up our locations with each other, I thought I’d play it safe.”
“I would’ve told you if you asked. It’s true that I don’t really broadcast what city I live in, but it’s not a secret either. More than a few viewers have figured it out based on pictures and random anecdotes.” Hyunjin pauses to mix paints, then goes on to say, “Did you hear that TwitchCon is being held earlier this year?”
“It is?”
“Mhm, in August, I think. Something about the venue not being available during the usual time.”
“Oh, I actually had no idea. Has it already been announced?”
“No, I just heard it through the grapevines. I think the organisers are still trying to see if they can book the venue for a later date, but apparently the chances aren’t good.”
Holding a conversation while gaming is a skill honed by years of streaming, but there are times when that skill lags. Right now is one of those times, and Felix ends up not replying to Hyunjin until after he’s killed a squad.
“Sorry, things got intense for a while there. What were you saying about TwitchCon?”
“TwitchCon is in our city.”
“Yeah?”
“I plan on going, and I’m assuming you’d be invited as a speaker for something.”
noisehues: good lord, felix, please take a hint :sadge:
paragoddess12: MY DUDE, HE WANTS TO MEET AT TWITCHCON
This time, Felix does die as a result of a missed shot. As his teammates scramble to kill their attackers and revive him, Felix stares at Hyunjin’s stream. Hyunjin’s got his back angled to the camera, brush in hand as he adds shadows to a landscape, and Felix is left wondering what expression he’s wearing right now.
fakeyesopen: oh my god i really need to go to twitchcon this year
anna_chxse: this is happening right im not hallucinating?
A shout from his teammate has Felix snapping back into reality, and he hangs in there long enough to secure second place. It’s not first place, but that’s not important right now. What’s important is:
“You want to meet?”
Felix sees Hyunjin lower his brush, but he doesn’t turn around.
“If you’d like to, yeah.”
“I’d love to.”
The stiff line of Hyunjin’s shoulders relaxes, and this time, Felix fully embraces the warmth that settles in his chest.
Jisung’s arm is a comfortable weight threaded through the crook of his elbow, and Felix lets his friend drag him through the mall in search of a new tripod. There’s nothing wrong with the one he’s currently using (currently being the keyword here), but Jisung has always been the type to upgrade his gadgets even when they work perfectly fine.
The mall is packed to the brim with people, but Jisung is determined to vlog his weekend even if it means going home with unreasonably shaky footage.
“Hey Felix,” Jisung presses close and raises his camera a little higher. “Would you still love me if I suddenly turned into a worm?”
“Jisung,” Felix says mildly. “What the fuck?”
“I’m serious. Answer the question!”
“I don’t think you’d give a shit about how I feel if you became a worm, Jisung. Do worms have feelings? Would you still love me if you became a worm and I remained human?”
Jisung splutters, his train of thought completely derailed after Felix suddenly turned the question back onto him.
“Exactly.” Felix looks straight into the camera and shrugs. “I’ll say this though, if we both became worms, I’d still love you.”
Jisung visibly melts, and Felix gets a total of two and a half seconds to prepare himself before his friend is nuzzling up against his cheek and cooing about how Felix is “the bestest friend ever!”
As Felix had predicted, the first five stores that Jisung steps foot into sell nothing related to video cameras. Or any kind of technology, for that matter. He ends up buying a ton of clothes, because according to the YouTuber, he needs to stay fresh and in-trend if he wants to keep his viewers.
“But I don’t watch your content for your outfits,” Felix frowns. Jisung drops another two shirts onto Felix’s clothes-laden arms and pats him on the cheek.
“Yes, but that’s because we’re friends and you have an abnormally kind heart. I’ll stop after this though, I promise.”
Their pace is considerably slower by the time they finally make it to the tech store, hindered by the weight of Jisung’s many shopping bags. Not wanting to risk knocking something expensive over, Felix waits by the entrance of the store, bags pooled at his feet.
Felix! @snipurr95 • now
going shopping with @jisungies is basically a workout 🆘
He’s switching out of the Twitter app when someone taps him on the shoulder.
“Felix…? Oh my god, it’s really you, can we please take a photo with you?”
It still blows Felix’s mind that he’s built a brand big enough for people to recognise him when he’s out and about in public. They’re usually young and impressionable spirits that look up to his gaming skills (or, as Jisung likes to put it, drawn to his “devastatingly good looks”), and this time isn’t any different.
He poses with the girls, scratching bashfully at his collar when they tell him they’ve been fans for years. After tripping over his words of thanks, Felix bids them goodbye with a wave and waits until they’ve disappeared into the crowd before he exhales.
So surreal.
Jisung’s voice trickles over and Felix picks up on enough words for him to figure out that he’s probably going to be waiting for a little while longer. So he turns back to his phone for some entertainment, but just as his eyes are about to flick down to the screen, he glimpses something that has him doing a double-take.
Standing at the entrance to the art supplies shop two units down is none other than Hyunjin.
Felix doesn’t have a good angle, but there’s no mistaking that profile. It’s Hyunjin, in the flesh, and he’s mere metres away.
But Hyunjin isn’t alone, and he seems to be knee-deep in an argument with his companion. Now that his attention is solely on the two men, Felix realises with a start that he can hear them clearly.
“Changbin! Kids don’t need good paints, they need non-toxic paints!”
“Well, why can’t I get good and non-toxic paints!”
“Because! These”–Hyunjin brandishes a box of paints–“are expensive and kids do not understand the concept of not wasting expensive paints! Do you really want to be scrubbing almost a hundred dollars of paint off plastic tables and chairs? If you say yes, I’m not helping you next time.”
Oh, so this is the kindergarten teacher friend.
Changbin looks from Hyunjin to the paints and back again. In the seconds of silence that follow, Felix half expects the argument to continue, but Changbin simply slings a beefy arm across Hyunjin’s shoulders.
“What would I do without you?”
“Be broke,” Hyunjin deadpans. He slips out from under Changbin’s arm and sets the paints back down. Felix can’t be sure from this distance, but he thinks the smile on Changbin’s face falters for a second or two before it returns.
The pair move further into the shop and away from Felix’s line of sight. His pulse pounds, insistent in the back of his throat and within the confines of his ribs. Felix knows, logically, that bumping into Hyunjin isn’t as impossible as it seems, but actually experiencing it is something he wasn’t prepared for.
“Why do you look so flushed?”
Jisung materialises next to him, shopping bag in hand. There’s definitely more than a tripod inside that bag, but Jisung wouldn’t be Jisung if he didn’t make salespeople happy.
“You’re already done?”
“What’s that supposed to mean? I bought the tripod I wanted!”
“And?”
“…And another GoPro, but stop changing the subject. Why are you blushy?”
“It’s exertion from carrying all your damn bags,” Felix says. He bends to gather them up and wills the heat in his cheeks to die down.
Jisung doesn’t let the opportunity slip – he pans his camera down the length of Felix’s body, making sure every single bag is caught in frame before he lowers the camera and takes some of the bags off Felix’s arms.
“You say that like I’m not paying you for your time and effort,” Jisung points out.
They start walking, and Felix cannot help but look into the art store when they pass by. He spots Changbin, but not Hyunjin, and disappointment settles like a heavy weight in his gut. Now that he’s seen Hyunjin in the flesh, nothing else seems to compare, not even a dozen HQ screenshots of Hyunjin during his streams.
It’s silly to be upset about this, especially knowing that he’ll be meeting Hyunjin soon. Details for TwitchCon were announced a couple of weeks ago, and the rumours that Hyunjin heard turned out to be true. The event will be held in August, in a little less than two months.
Two months is nothing.
Squaring his shoulders, Felix looks away from the shop and turns to Jisung.
“I’m getting paid? With what?”
“My companionship,” Jisung grins. When Felix rolls his eyes in mock annoyance and starts speedwalking away, Jisung hurries to add, “And I’ll buy you food!”
Felix’s stream might have ended forty minutes ago, but he probably won’t be logging off for another couple of hours. Why would he, when Hyunjin wants to stay up late and play Genshin with him?
His (their?) viewers would feel terribly betrayed if they ever found out that Felix had deprived them of this content, but Hyunjin specifically asked to game together after he was done streaming, and Felix isn’t about to deprive himself of this.
“I hope you don’t mind helping me grind domains and whatnot. I’ve been neglecting this game and I’ve got a lot to catch up on.”
“Of course not. I even have a backup account if I run out of resin on this one.”
Hyunjin’s laughter trickles softly into his ears, coaxing goosebumps to life. It has Felix feeling suspended in time, here within the four walls of his room where the lights are dimmed and the sounds of life outside fail to reach him.
It isn’t Felix’s first time gaming with Hyunjin off stream, but it’s the first time they’re playing a game with just the two of them. There’s a shared intimacy here that he can’t quite explain. If he closes his eyes, he can imagine that they’re seated shoulder-to-shoulder, breaths synchronised as they spend time with each other.
He clears his throat and tells himself to stop daydreaming.
“Who are you focusing on building now?”
“Nilou! I was lucky and got her in twenty pulls.” As he speaks, he switches from the Traveler to Nilou and walks right up to Felix’s Ganyu.
“You’re still free-to-play? I thought you would be willing to splurge a little on games now that your channel’s growing.”
Hyunjin hums. “I’m making more, but I just end up spending most of that money on art supplies anyway. I still can’t find any justification to spend on gacha games.”
“Yeah…gacha games really do suck money out of you.”
He speaks from painful first-hand experience.
On screen, Nilou twirls in a graceful circle and Felix suddenly understands why Hyunjin would roll for this character. Then Hyunjin sends her off running down the streets of Liyue, and Felix hurries to follow.
For a while, all Felix does is stick close to Hyunjin and fight anything that threatens to harm a single pixelated hair on Nilou’s pixelated body. Hyunjin tries to contribute, but Felix’s characters are simply too strong to give him the chance to do so.
“It’s like you’re my bodyguard,” Hyunjin exclaims. He finishes collecting the loot and punctuates his statement with a few jumps by Felix’s side.
Felix wants to bury his face in his hands. So cute.
As they run from one area of Teyvat to another, they talk. There was a lot of awkwardness at the beginning of their friendship, an unavoidable byproduct of two people getting to know each other through bursts of online interaction, but things have gotten much more comfortable over time.
They don’t yet know each other’s deepest, darkest secrets or life stories, but Felix believes they’ll get there eventually.
“So Minho tells me he’s been helping you choreograph a piece for your senior showcase.”
“Helping?” Hyunjin scoffs. “If helping means being a complete nuisance, yes.”
Felix snickers as he accepts an invite from Hyunjin to join him in a domain. “He’s so tsundere all the time that when he’s sincerely nice it feels as though he’s tricking you. Full of mind games, that guy. He delights in it.”
“He scares me sometimes. I’ve told him that once – he just stared at me then slapped my ass really hard.”
In the domains, Hyunjin’s able to do a lot more. His Nilou may not be as built as Felix’s team, but just having Hydro around is enough to keep enemies frozen and harmless for most of the time, turning the challenge into a walk in the park.
“How do you know Minho anyway? I don’t think I ever asked you that before.”
“Met him three or four years ago when he started dating my childhood friend,” Felix says. The memory of Chan telling him that he’s met a great guy is vivid in Felix’s mind; he’d never seen his friend so giddy.
“They’re perpetually in the honeymoon stage, it’s honestly a little nauseating sometimes to watch them.”
“Minho acting all lovey-dovey? I can’t imagine.”
“Oh, he doesn’t. At least not in front of people. The most I’ve seen him do is let Chan hug him for three and a half seconds before he’s wriggling free. But Chan says he loves the prickly, sarcastic side of him just as much as the elusive, sweet side of him. Love acts in the weirdest ways with them, I swear.”
Over the months, Felix has learned how easy it is to pull laughter out of Hyunjin. The artist truly does laugh at everything and anything, and the best part is the fact that it’s always genuine.
“Small world, huh? Meeting the way we did only to find out that we live in the same city and have mutual friends. Guess who messaged me the other day?”
“Who?”
“Jeongin. You’re friends, right? He sent me a photo of the two of you together.” At Felix’s exclamation of surprise, Hyunjin chuckles. “I met him during my brief foray into the modelling world and became fast friends. He made that job a lot more bearable, and I’m happy that he blossomed where I withered, because you know what, it was really for the best. Modelling is not the career path for me.”
“Really? That’s too bad.”
The words spill forth before Felix has the chance to force them through several filters.
“Too bad?” Hyunjin’s voice has taken on a teasing lilt. “What do you mean?”
Ah, fuck.
“I, I just – I think you would make a good model,” Felix finishes lamely. “In my opinion.”
“Aw, Felix. You think I’m cute?”
Yes, Felix screams internally. Very cute!
“Aren’t we supposed to be clearing domains?”
Hyunjin laughs again and Felix, despite wanting to crawl into a hole, drinks it in greedily.
“For the record, I think you’re pretty cute, too.”
Felix! @snipurr95 • 2 mins
twitchcon in three days! hoping to see you all there :) i’ll be hosting a panel with several other amazing streamers as well as a meet and greet session after, so come say hi!hyun @hwang_hj • now
Replying to @snipurr95
:)
Felix likes Hyunjin’s reply and wonders if there’s a way to catch all the butterflies in his stomach. He’s seen Hyunjin from afar, sure, but that felt nothing more like a fever dream. Actually seeing him in person might be what finally does him in.
When Jisung announces his arrival by yelling out Felix’s name, Felix gives himself a mental slap to sober up and gathers the rest of his things. He’s being dragged out by Jisung and Jeongin, because someone (read: Seungmin) let it slip (read: consciously told them) that Felix will be meeting Hyunjin for the first time at TwitchCon.
So, being the friends that they are, Jisung and Jeongin have taken it upon themselves to make sure Felix will be the hottest person ever to grace TwitchCon’s halls. When Jisung sent a message in their group chat informing Felix of The Plan™️, Felix had half a mind to weasel out of it. But when Jeongin seconded The Plan™️ and said I know Hyunjin’s going to appreciate this, Felix decided to just go along with it.
Which brings him to the present, where Felix’s dear friends are waiting for him in the living room, likely with their trusty cameras in hand.
“There you are,” Jisung says, clicking his tongue. With a hand around Felix’s wrist, he pulls him over to where a pair of shoes are waiting. “Are you ready? We have a lot to do today, can’t miss our appointments!”
Felix is whisked out the door the moment those shoes are on his feet, and the last thing he hears before it swings shut behind them is Seungmin calling out, “Have fun!”
The first stop on the agenda turns out to be the salon, where they’re led to the back of the establishment and into a VIP room. They take their seats, Jisung already busy thumbing through dye books. Felix may be the one that’s meeting a cute boy, but Jisung and Jeongin are also more than happy to squeeze in some pampering for themselves.
“You guys really didn’t have to go all out, you know. How much is this going to cost?”
Refreshments come in the form of iced tea and warm cookies, and Felix has an inkling that these are not store-bought.
“This will cost us nothing,” Jeongin says easily. “Just a promotional post on my Instagram that I am more than willing to do.”
Oh. Well, in that case, Felix doesn’t feel too bad.
“So I think you should do something drastic to your hair.” Jisung holds up the book and points to a curled lock of synthetic hair. “I think you should go silver. You’ve been sticking to so many boring colours recently; what happened to the Felix that I used to know?”
“That Felix got tired of having a whole head of dead hair,” Felix deadpans. “But you’re right, it’s been a while since I’ve experimented with something fun. Silver looks nice, and I haven’t done that before.”
They spend another few minutes discussing what the final look should be before the doors open and their stylists come in. Jisung takes the reins and Felix lets him, conceding that the vision would turn out to be a great one if executed well. Judging by how posh everything in this place seems to be, Felix wouldn’t expect anything less.
It isn’t long before things get underway. Felix’s stylist, a friendly middle-aged woman with incredibly deft hands, works with such confidence that there’s simply no way anything can go wrong. The bleach doesn’t sting, the water is at the perfect temperature, and when she lowers her scissors, his bangs frame his face perfectly.
Hours later, Jeongin spins around in his chair and nods in approval.
“You look really good. Honestly, I wasn’t too sure about silver because there’s a chance that colour would wash you out, but it suits you. Gives you a little…edge. It’s kinda sexy.”
Felix blanches. “Please never call me sexy again.”
Jeongin simply rolls his eyes. “Fine, I won't, but I’m not wrong here.”
One glance into the mirror and Felix has to admit that Jeongin isn’t wrong at all. He looks good; expensive and untouchable. Jisung pops up next to him, his own hair now a deep red, and Felix has to laugh when he sees the pride on Jisung’s face.
Jisung takes a few minutes to film for his vlog, not forgetting to mention that Felix’s new look is entirely his idea. Then he places the camera aside and turns to Felix.
“You have to hide your hair until TwitchCon,” Jisung says. “It must come as a surprise to everyone, especially Hyunjin. God, I can already imagine all the articles written about you and your new hair.”
“You are extraordinarily invested in this.”
“Truth be told, I just want you to get laid, get a new boyfriend, and be disgustingly in love.”
Felix, face aflame, nearly throws a half-eaten cookie at Jisung’s head.
Completely unfazed despite the threat of bodily harm, Jisung barrels on.
“You broke up with that self-absorbed asshole, what, almost three years ago? You haven’t expressed interest in anybody since then, and it’s not like you’re short of suitors either. You having feelings for someone is practically a miracle, Felix, so yeah, you’re damn right I’m invested. I want a front row seat to this love story.”
He pulls Felix out of the chair and sets both hands on his shoulders.
“We will help you get your man,” Jisung says. He tosses a look over at Jeongin. “Right?”
“Right!”
That night, Felix returns home with several bags of new clothes (some sponsored thanks to Jeongin’s many connections in the fashion industry) and glowing skin. His pores are the cleanest they have ever been, and his brows have never looked so perfect.
“Wow,” Seungmin says. He’s cross-legged on the couch, laptop balancing on his thighs as a sitcom plays on the television. “They did a number on you, huh?”
“I don’t even know if there is room in my closet for these clothes.”
“That’s because half of your closet is filled with your merch,” Seungmin points out. “If you did something about that, like I suggested all those months ago, then maybe you’d have space.”
Groaning, Felix drops the bags on the floor and topples over onto the couch, head landing mere inches away from Seungmin’s knee. “Please spare me the lecture, my feet ache and I just had my pores squeezed to hell and back. There were so many machines, Seungmin. So many.”
Seungmin pats Felix on the head, silvery strands slipping through the gaps between his fingers. “There, there. I’m sure the adventure you had today will pay off.”
“It better pay off. Jisung made me get leather pants, Seungmin. And he’s making me wear them.” Felix pouts. “He says it’ll make my non-existent ass exist.”
The corners of Seungmin’s mouth twitch.
“For your sake, I hope he’s right. It’s good to have an ass.”
Ugh, Felix is too tired to defend himself.
Jeongin comes over early on the day of TwitchCon with his gigantic makeup kit in tow.
He is already dressed to the nines, looking every inch the in-demand model he is. Still half-asleep, Felix is pliant and obedient as he sits in his chair and lets Jeongin work his magic. They’re keeping it simple, Jeongin tells him, with a focus on highlighting the natural planes of his face and the depth in his eyes. A flush of colour to his cheeks, a matching shade on his lips.
Then Felix finds himself looking at what is supposed to be his own reflection, except he never knew he could look this…perfect.
“You’ve done my makeup before,” Felix says. “You’ve never put in this much effort.”
Jeongin lifts a silk-clad shoulder. “Like Jisung says, we’re on a mission. Now come here, time to get dressed.”
Simple, Jeongin reiterates. A thin, barely-there turtleneck, those leather pants, and matching black boots. It’s supposed to be a sunny day, but Felix supposes it wouldn’t matter either way, seeing how he’ll be spending most of it indoors.
Jeongin fishes out a box from his bag and hands it over to Felix.
Inside is a bunch of sleek, polished jewellery. Felix typically chooses to keep his fingers and wrists bare as it’s more comfortable gaming that way, but this time is as good as any to change that. A bracelet, a ring or two.
“Nice,” Jeongin nods. “Let me add a bit of hairspray, hold on.”
Once Jeongin gives Felix’s final look his stamp of approval, Jeongin snaps a few pictures and sends them over to Jisung.
sungies [10:08:43]: GODDAMN LOOK AT YOU
sungies [10:09:05]: if this doesn’t end up a case of love at first sight then i'm losing faith in love
Me [10:09:16]: kfjhgksd he’s seen my face many times before dude
sungies [10:09:29]: love at three hundred and twentieth sight then shut up u know what i mean
sungies [10:09:41]: anyway see y’all there!! i may be fashionably late but it’ll be worth it 😘
Felix managed to get free tickets for his friends, although some are unfortunately unable to attend. He will, however, happily admit that Minho not being there is a blessing in disguise.
A part of him wants to stay home where it’s safe and familiar, but Jeongin’s grip around his wrist is iron-clad, and he is helpless to follow when that grip guides him out of the room. Seungmin’s already waiting for them by the door – it’s his first TwitchCon, despite having been Felix’s housemate for years. He says he’s going for the karaoke machines, but Felix knows he’s going because he’s eager to see how things play out between him and Hyunjin.
“Looking good,” Seungmin says, head tilted as he scans Felix from head to toe. “Who knows, maybe he’ll ask to draw you like one of his French girls.”
Felix sighs. “It’s only ten in the morning, how are you already coming up with shit like this?”
“It’s a talent, what can I say?”
It isn’t Felix’s first rodeo as a panellist at TwitchCon, but it is the first time he’s been invited to participate in such important discussions. The organisers did a great job putting together the list of panellists, and Felix is more than happy to share the stage with fellow content creators of colour and LGBTQ+ gamers.
The panel takes up a good part of the afternoon, covering topics ranging from creating a safer and more inclusive community to their own experiences overcoming hurdles. Felix feels a little worn out by the time the panel wraps, but it’s a tiredness well-earned.
He’d love to find a nice, quiet corner somewhere to relax for a while before his meet-and-greet session begins, but he doesn’t have the time. Hell, he barely has the time to drain a bottle of water before he has to rush off to the other side of the hall.
But he makes it with minutes to spare, and he makes a mental note to thank Jeongin for the hairspray. There’s already a long line formed in front of his booth, a sight that never fails to amaze Felix no matter how often he’s done this.
“So,” a familiar voice says, and Felix turns around to see Jisung leaning against a booth like he belongs there. “Have you seen him yet?”
“First of all, what on earth are you doing here? How are you here?”
“I used my fame to get here, of course. I may not be a streamer, but I am a popular YouTuber. Remember how I said I wanted a front row seat? Well, I’m getting it.”
Felix stares at him. Jisung grins.
“I saw him, you know. Your handsome artist-dancer hybrid. Saw him at his merch booth like twenty minutes ago. I’m guessing you haven’t had the time to check social media yet, but that’s a good thing, because I cannot wait to see the look on your face when you finally lay eyes on him.”
Oh. Felix’s day has been so hectic that he’d completely forgotten he was supposed to meet Hyunjin today. Hyunjin had dropped him a text yesterday saying that he’ll find Felix at some point, but he didn’t offer up any other details apart from that.
“You saw him?”
The grin that spreads across Jisung’s face speaks volumes.
“Mhm. He really is cute.” Jisung lifts his chin in the direction of the crowd and Felix whirs around, heart in his throat. But he doesn’t see Hyunjin, of course, and he doesn’t get the chance to really look before Jisung is adding, “Game face on, sweetie, meet-and-greet is starting.”