Chapter Text
Billy jumped from the three point line and managed to throw the ball over Gary’s hands which were blocking him. It fell right into the hoop and through the basket. Paul clapped a hand over Billy’s shoulder, “Nice shot”.
They had made it to the end of the season and Billy was at his top skill level. Hawkins was going to state. He did not want to brag but he definitely felt that he had something to do with that accomplishment.
The coach blew his whistle, signaling the end of practice. “We’ve got one week until we go to state. So, you assholes better practice on your own time every day you’re not practicing in here. I will not accept failure. So you better pull your heads out of your asses and prepare to win! You haven’t won anything yet.”
A few of the guys rolled their eyes. No, they only won all of the games up until that point. So yeah nothing.
“Alright, good work. Hit the showers. And Hargrove, my office.”
Everyone glanced over at Billy as they walked in the direction of the locker rooms. What the hell does he want, Billy thought. Nonetheless, he followed the coach into his office.
They entered the office and Coach motioned for Billy to take a seat in the chair across from his desk. They both sat down. “How are you doing?”
Billy looked over at him confused, “I’m alright?”
Coach brought his hands together, “Alright, let’s get straight to it. I faxed over the list of names who are going to be playing in the state game. The school administration needed it to make transportation and hotel accommodations. And. . . it has come to my attention that you must be accompanied by a Caregiver on the trip.”
Billy's mouth hung wide open, “What?”
“Just as a precaution, for if anything were to happen-”
“But nothing’s going to happen!”
“Billy. By law, you’re required to bring a Caregiver. End of discussion.”
Billy threw his head back and slouched in the chair, “I don’t even have a Caregiver.”
“You can request a temporary Caregiver through the state, or maybe ask a Caregiver that you know. And worst scenario, Mrs Jensen has offered to come along on the trip. So, you have options.”
Billy covered his face with his hands and groaned loudly; he knew he did not have a choice. And he sure as hell didn’t want Mrs Jensen tagging along and worrying about him the whole goddamn time, ruining the game. “I’ll figure it out.”
Coach gave him a sharp nod. “You’ve got a week to figure it out. Now get your ass out of here.” Billy acted annoyed when he left the office but he appreciated the fact the Coach did not treat him any differently after the news about his classification came out.
. . .
And that was how Billy ended up at the front step of the Harrington house. He almost turned around and walked right back to his car, but eventually he knocked on the door. He stuck his hands into his pockets, it was nearly winter. Half a minute later, Steve opened the front door. He smiled confused, “Hey. What are you doing here?”
“Uh. . .”
Steve noticed how cold it was outside and motioned for Billy to follow him back inside the house. “So what are you doing here?” Billy followed Steve into the kitchen and sat down at a barstool.
“Uhh, so the state final is next week,” Steve nodded, he remembered playing in it when he was in high school, “And uhhh, obviously it's in Indy so we have to drive down there and stay in a hotel.” Billy was fidgeting and looking down at his lap while he spoke, it confused Steve.
“And uhh, in order to go, I uhh, I need a Caregiver to come with me.” Billy shyly stared at his lap.
Steve immediately smiled, he beamed actually, “Yes of course. I told you, anytime you need a Caregiver I’ll be there.” Billy slowly looked up at Steve and smiled a little when he noticed the smile that stretched all the way across Steve’s face. He let out a breath.
Steve leaned his elbows on the countertop, “I’m excited. It’ll be fun.”
Steve stood up and took a step towards the fridge, “Do you want a beer?”
Once Billy got over the initial shock of Steve offering him alcohol, he nodded his head. Steve pulled two beers out of the fridge and popped the caps off of both of them. He slid one across the counter to Billy.
Billy took a moment to glance around the room. It was very large and very fancy, but also very cold. It was not welcoming. “So what do you do in this giant house by yourself all day?”
“I uh I normally just stay in my bedroom. I don’t really care to be down here.”
Billy could understand why. He could easily see it becoming eerie at night. Steve took a sip of his beer and shivered. He wrapped an arm around himself, “Hey, do you uh, do you want to go upstairs?”
Billy silently followed Steve, beer in hand, all the way up the stairs to his bedroom. Steve shut the door behind them, closing them off from the rest of the big lonely house, while Billy looked around the room. For the most part it was plain; ordinary. Nothing about it said ‘Steve Harrington’. It could easily have passed as a guest room. It was big though. He had a freaking couch in his bedroom.
Steve took a seat on his bed. His king sized bed . Billy couldn’t even imagine having such luxury. On the same hand he also couldn’t imagine growing up completely alone. Max was his goddamn lifeline, and before she came into his life he at least had a mother who loved him. Steve didn’t have anybody.
Billy sat down on the couch.
“Have you been doing okay?”
Billy looked up to see Steve looking at him.
“Umm, yeah. I uh, I dropped a few days ago, so I feel pretty good right now. . . And I started going to the Little care room at school, so I think that’s helping a little bit.” Billy purposely did not mention his moments of weakness hiding in the bathroom sucking his thumb. For whatever reason a part of him thought Steve would be disappointed in him and the thought of that made his stomach hurt.
“That’s great! I haven’t been doing much lately. I mean just playing taxi driver for my kids and going to work. But that’s everyday. And I work with this girl, Robin, and she’s just awesome. She’s so smart and funny and she’s ya know my age which is a plus. It brings the ‘friends my age’ count to two, which is better than one so. . .”
Billy nodded his head. He and Steve still weren’t exactly friends, regardless of what Steve thought. They didn’t hang out often. They were more acquaintances than anything. So, the conversation still felt somewhat awkward and he did not know what to say to keep it going. Steve did not seem to have any problem though.
“Speaking of which, I’m glad you stopped by. It is nice to hang out with older friends since ya know my kids are all thirteen and fourteen years old. I miss being able to just sit back and have a beer and talk.”
Steve smiled at him genuinely, but Billy still felt a little out of place sitting on that couch in Steve Harrington's bedroom.
. . .
Before long, the big day had approached.
The bus was leaving immediately after the school day ended. The coach had already warned all of them that at exactly 3:15pm the bus would be pulling out of the parking lot, no exceptions. None of them actually believed him of course, there was no way the bus would leave without the full team. Nonetheless, Billy told Steve he needed to be waiting in the parking lot at 3:00pm.
Steve sat in his car in front of Hawkins high school from 2:30-3:00pm. There was no way in hell he was going to mess it up for Billy. And at 3:02pm, he saw Billy walking towards him with something close to a smile on his face so he got out of the car. Steve flung his backpack over his shoulder, and locked his car.
“Hey,” he said as Billy got closer, “Are you ready?”
Billy nodded, his own bag in hand, “Yeah, let’s go.”
And together they walked towards the large yellow bus on the other side of the parking lot. The coach greeted them at the door with a clipboard in hand to mark off Billy’s name, “Harrington,” he said surprised, “It’s good to see you. How are you doing?”
“I’m good, I’m good.” The coach clapped him on the shoulder, “I’m glad to hear it.”
When they climbed onto the bus, the utter shock and disbelief was written all over everyones face. Because what the hell was King Steve doing on the bus? He graduated two years ago. Their heads all followed him until he awkwardly plopped down on a seat with Billy at the back of the bus. He threw their bags onto the empty seat to their right.
“Yo, Harrington!”
Steve looked up to see David Gallan climbing onto the bus. He was on the team while Steve was still in high school. Sure, he was nice, but they were teammates at best.
Steve forced a smile, “Hey, man.”
David sat down in the seat in front of them, “Damn, what are you doing here? It's been a while.”
Steve glanced next to him at Billy, who was watching them unimpressed, “Oh, uh, I’m hanging out with Billy.”
David looked between the two and smiled genuinely, obviously picking up on what that implied, “Bitchin’ dude.”
Steve smiled back. As nice as David was, Steve was ready to be done with the conversation. David was always kind of an airhead.
As promised, at exactly 3:15pm the bus pulled out of the parking lot and hit the road. The travel time was approximately two hours and Steve was not looking forward to the sore back he was sure he would have the next day.
Steve passed the time by listening in on the stupid conversations the guys were having around him. Billy was quiet, which he expected after Max told him that Billy napped after school every day. She also made sure to mention that he turned into a crabby zombie when he didn’t take one.
Around forty five minutes into the drive Billy started dozing off and jerking himself back awake. Steve watched as he continued to fade more and more, as the exhaustion took over his body. His internal clock said it was nap time, like it was every other normal day, and he could not ignore the demand.
By 4:15pm, one hour into the drive, Billy was completely asleep, mouth wide open, head resting on Steve's shoulder. Steve did not mind. He tried not to move too much so he would not wake Billy up. A few of the guys noticed, but said nothing. It was not in a judgemental way, more of a glance over and oh Billy’s asleep , then back to their conversation.
David turned around to face them again. Oh, this should be good.
He looked at Billy, then back to Steve. “He looks mad tired.”
Steve did not even have to look, “Yeah, he is.”
“Is he sick or something? Because we’re gonna get our asses handed to us if he can’t play.”
Steve chuckled, “No, no, he’s not sick.”
David glanced over at Billy warily, so Steve added quietly, “I think he normally naps after school, so. . .”
David nodded in understanding. It was so easy to forget that Billy was a Little when he was all muscle and ‘fight to the death’ at school when it came to virtually anything. There was not a single thing about him from an outside perspective that said Little. It made sense that people forgot.
Billy remained asleep for almost the entirety of the drive. With a little less than half an hour left, Steve started to get antsy. Billy’s head was still resting on Steve’s shoulder so he could not move much, and his back had started to ache from sitting on the hard seat.
Steve was fully zoned out, thinking about everything he had done earlier in the week when a voice behind him said, “Uhhh, Harrington?”
Steve turned his head as much as he could without waking Billy. Jimmy, who was sitting in the seat behind them, was awkwardly looking at him. Hesitantly he said, “Uhh did Hargr- I think- uhhhh”
Steve followed Jimmy’s eyes down to the floor. The floor that was wet .
“Oh, shit.”
Steve turned back around to look at Billy, and yes, his jeans were fucking soaked . Sadly he whispered to himself, “Oh, Billy.”
The first thing Steve did was check his watch. They only had about fifteen minutes left before they got to the hotel. So Steve had two options. Option one: wake Billy up and try to calm the inevitable meltdown that was sure to happen. Or option two: let him sleep and remain blissfully unaware until they got to the hotel and were able to get off the bus and away from people.
Steve chose the former.
But of fucking course the coach took the opportunity to loudly yell, “We’ll be arriving in a little over ten minutes. And when we get there stay in the lobby so you can get your room keys.”
For Steve, it was like watching a disaster strike in slow motion. Billy woke up, lifted his head off of Steve’s shoulder, sat up straight, tensed up, looked down, and then broke.
His head shot towards Steve with panic written all over his face. He looked utterly terrified. It was a look that said Billy had no idea what to do and that he was screaming for Steve to do something, anything to make it go away. Billy’s eyes were shiny. Steve was immediately there to pick up the pieces, “Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay. We’re almost there and we can get cleaned up. It’s not a big deal.”
Billy continued to stare at Steve with a terrified expression. Steve wasn’t even sure that Billy was still breathing; he was completely mortified. Billy leaned forward and pressed his forehead to the seat in front of them, shielding his face from Steve and everyone else on the bus.
Steve tried again, “Billy, look at me. It’s okay. I’m here. I’m gonna help you get cleaned up. Nobody is going to know.”
But then of course David had to go and open his big fucking mouth. Loudly he said, “Ugh, what the hell is that smell?”
Someone else yelled, “Shower every once in a while, why don’t ya.” Steve didn’t recognize the voice, but everyone laughed.
But David wouldn’t fucking leave it alone, “No, it smells like- like piss. Like someone fucking pissed on the flo-“ The words died on his tongue as he turned around to see Billy hiding and Steve with a warning look on his face. “Oh.”
Billy wanted to jump out the window and get hit by a car. He wanted to be dead. He felt Steve’s hand running up and down his back comfortingly, but it did nothing to subside the mortification. His face remained firetruck red and his eyes remained watery.
Billy did not hear anyone talk after that and he could only assume Steve gave them the look that said more than any words ever could, the way he always did when he was protecting someone.
Then after the longest ten minutes of his goddamn life, the bus finally pulled into the hotel parking lot.
Billy refused to move. He was not getting off the bus until everyone else was gone. Steve remained by his side the entire time and continued to rub circles on his back as everyone got off of the bus, while Billy continued to freak the fuck out. Billy only lifted his head up once it was silent. With a quick scan to make sure everyone was actually gone, Billy shoved his way past Steve to get out of the seat and get the fuck away.
Steve called after him, then quickly grabbed both of their backpacks and chased after him.
“Billy, wait!”
Billy ignored him and jogged into the hotel lobby. He quickly ran past his teammates and down the hall where he spotted the sign that said ‘Restrooms’. Steve was right behind him, chasing after him while calling his name. The bathroom finally came into view, and Billy managed to run inside and close and lock the door before Steve had the opportunity to follow him inside.
Steve stood outside the bathroom door helplessly. “Come on, Billy. Let me in please.” Steve dropped their backpacks to the floor and gently knocked on the door.
“I’m here to help you, but you have to let me.”
Steve sighed sadly, “I’m here, Billy. Just open the door.”
Steve leaned his body against the wall, defeated.
A few moments later, Steve jumped when he heard the lock click open. Then the door slowly opened. Steve gently pushed his way inside before Billy could change his mind and close the door again. And there stood Billy; eyes red and wet with tears. His arms were wrapped around himself and he looked so small.
“Oh, buddy.” Steve grabbed their backpacks and pulled them into the small bathroom, then closed and locked the door behind him, providing Billy with privacy from the rest of the world.
Billy held his arms out pitifully and all but melted into Steve’s arms when he pulled Billy against his chest. The sobs returned and Billy’s entire body shook. Steve ran his hand over Billy’s hair, “Shhhhh, it’s okay. I’ve got you. I’m not going anywhere.” Billy cried from deep down in his soul. The embarrassment, and anger washed over him and filled him with a feeling of anxiety and fear.
A part of him never wanted to see his teammates again. He did not want to have to confront what he did. The rational side of his brain knew they would not laugh at him, but the fear spoke louder. Billy cried until he could not cry anymore.
After a few minutes of helping Billy calm down, Steve gently pulled away from the hug, and wiped the tears off of Billy’s face. Billy whined desperately at the loss of contact, then his face tinted pink in embarrassment. Steve once again shushed him, “Do you want to go to our room and get cleaned up?”
And that was when reality seemed to slap Billy across the face. Because there was no way in hell he was going to walk to their room with wet pants.
Billy must have looked terrified because Steve was right back to pulling him into his arms. “I’m gonna help you, I promise. We can stay here. I just thought you might like to take an actual shower. But I’m not going to make you do anything you don’t want to do, I promise.” Billy closed his eyes and rested his chin on Steve’s shoulder. He exhaled.
As promised, Steve helped Billy get cleaned up in the small bathroom. With a combination of soap and damp paper towels, they made it work. Billy did not put up a fight when Steve wiped down his legs, saying he did not want him to get a rash. Billy allowed himself to be cared for in ways that he had not before. And a newfound sense of trust was established between them.
Billy only drew the line when Steve held out a clean pair of underwear, telling Billy to step in. Yeah, too fucking far. Steve of course apologized, then simply handed Billy a pair of sweatpants, and busied himself with zipping up Billy’s backpack.
Then, Steve announced he was going to get their room key from the coach, and even after being cleaned up and in dry clothes, Billy refused to join him. So, Billy waited in the bathroom while Steve went and got their room key, then together they walked up to their room.
The hotel was gross, to put it bluntly. When Steve finally got the door to their room open, he grimaced. It was somehow worse than the hallway. There was a musty odor that lingered in the air as well as moldy water spots on the ceiling. It appeared as if it had not been renovated anytime in the last fifty years and was just overall disgusting. They stepped inside the room and by the look on Billy’s face, he thought the exact same thing. Steve wasn’t surprised given the fact that the school funded the trip, but even when he went to state in high school the hotel was at least decent . He stared down at the crusty carpet of what could barely be considered a motel.
Billy set his backpack down on the floor, “Well, this is a fucking shithole.”
Steve could not help but laugh. “Hey, it’s only for two nights. And we got our own room.”
Billy gave the room a once over, “Yeah, lucky us.”
The rest of the team was put four to a room, each having two queen beds. So, even though Billy and Steve were put in a single room and still had to share a bed, Steve considered it the better end of the deal.
Their relaxation time was short lived, because not even half an hour later, someone was pounding on their door yelling something about getting dinner.
Normally, Billy would not be caught dead wearing sweatpants in public, but Steve had his jeans soaking in the bathtub, acting as a makeshift washing machine, and he did not bring any other pants; so he did not have much of a choice. He left the room with a scowl on his face.
They met the team in the hotel lobby where the coach was also waiting for them, then together they all walked across the street to a small diner. Once they got inside, everyone sat together across four tables. Steve plopped down on a chair next to Billy. Thankfully they were somewhat secluded from the rest of the team.
Apparently the school was also paying for all of their food the entirety of the trip; Steve figured that was probably why their hotel was such a dump. A few minutes later, a waitress walked over and gave everyone a menu, then said she would be back with some waters.
Steve picked up a menu. You’ve got to be kidding me. Apparently the diner was attempting to appear fancier than it actually was, because the entire fucking menu was written in cursive. And there was not a picture in sight.
After a few minutes, Steve lightly elbowed Billy, “Hey, uh what are you getting?”
Billy responded without even looking up from the menu, “I don’t know. Probably a burger.”
Steve hummed. He really wanted spaghetti, but there was no way he could ask if they had that without sounding like a fucking moron.
Billy added, “Although a sandwich sounds good too.”
Steve nodded, “I could go for a sandwich.”
“Oh, they’ve got tacos too.”
“Man tacos sound even better.”
Billy rolled his eyes, “Did you even look at the menu?”
A deer in headlights-like expression made its way onto Steve’s face. Billy watched him confused, then his face softened when he realized, “Steve. . .”
Steve looked away embarrassed. Billy did not have to ask Steve if he was unable to read cursive. He knew— Steve could hardly read print.
Steve was brought back when Billy softly asked, “What do you feel like eating?”
Steve still really wanted spaghetti, but even after Billy did not laugh at him for not being able to read the menu, he was still too embarrassed to ask.
But then Billy gently said, “I can read the menu over for you, so you can decide what you want.”
Steve froze. Nobody had ever offered to do that before. Not Nancy, not his parents, nobody. Steve swallowed his pride and hesitantly asked, “Do they have spaghetti?”
Billy glanced over the menu, “Umm. . .oh here it is, yeah. Do you want marinara or meat sauce?”
Billy asked him as if it were the most casual thing in the world. He did not look at him in pity like Nancy had, or call him hurtful names like his father had. He had simply answered Steve like they were equals. Steve’s eyes watered.
“Oh and it comes with a breadstick, or you can substitute it for a different side. They’ve got fries, broccoli, fruit, onion rings, and mashed potatoes.”
Billy looked up just in time to see Steve wipe his eyes. “What’s wrong?”
Billy looked at him all sad and confused and Steve could not help but smile. He shook his head, “Nothing. Just, thank you. Nobody has ever- thank you.”
Billy smiled at him sadly; he understood. He whispered, “You could have asked me. I don’t mind.” Truth be told, Billy thoroughly enjoyed helping Steve. It made him feel a little less guilty about Steve helping him so much. It was nice to feel needed sometimes.
Steve looked down and whispered back, “It’s embarrassing.”
“Dude, you literally wiped my ass earlier. I think we’re past the point of needing to feel embarrassed. At least when it’s just us.”
Steve chuckled. Billy reiterated, “If you need anything, just ask. I’m more than happy to help.”
Steve smiled, “Thanks, Billy.”
Their food ended up tasting fucking fantastic . Billy wasn’t surprised though; the small diner’s normally always had great food.
Billy ended up getting a chicken sandwich and fries. And he quickly ate every last bite. Steve did the same with his spaghetti, eating every last morsel that was possible without licking the plate clean.
About half an hour into dinner, Billy pushed his plate away and mumbled, “I’m going to the bathroom.” He was not sure why he felt like he needed to tell Steve where he was going all of the sudden. But, he waited for Steve to nod his head before he got up.
Steve was playing with the napkin in his hand when the coach called over, “Harrington.”
Steve looked up. Everyone had stopped talking and turned to look at him. “Is Hargrove alright?”
Steve quickly nodded, “Yeah he’s okay. I mean, he’s embarrassed, but we’ve got everything under control.”
The coach responded with a strong nod, apparently taking that as enough of an answer, and the rest of the team went back to their individual conversations. And that was the end of it. One question, one answer, and everyone moved on. Steve was thankful for that.
When Billy returned from the bathroom, Steve smiled at him as he walked up to the table and he smiled back.
. . .
When it came time to get ready for bed, Billy was automatically hesitant. Whatever the fuck that ‘moment’ they had at dinner was, it did not matter anymore. He was fucking embarrassed. Hiding away at the very bottom of his backpack were Mo and his blanky. Because as much as he didn’t want to have to bring them, he couldn’t risk not sleeping the night before the state final game.
Steve started pulling clothes out of his own backpack, “You can use the bathroom first.”
Billy nodded and just grabbed his entire backpack then entered the bathroom. He ran through his normal night routine. He brushed his teeth and put his pajamas on. He had to take a deep breath and remind himself that Steve already knew he would be wearing a diaper, and obviously did not care in the slightest bit, and that it was better than pissing himself again.
When he left the bathroom, he found Steve standing near the bed with a toothbrush in his hand. He gave Billy a small smile and walked past him into the bathroom, “I’ll be out in a minute.”
Billy slowly walked over to the bed and sat down. He pulled Mo and his blanky out of his backpack and quickly shoved them under the blankets. Forget pissing his pants, forget Steve wiping his ass, and forget his spiel on not needing to feel embarrassed around each other; Mo and his blanky were a whole other level of embarrassment. He grabbed his pacifier and closed it in his fist, then laid down. He was so tired.
A few minutes later, Steve walked out of the bathroom, threw his things into his backpack, then climbed into the bed with Billy. Steve pulled the blankets over his legs then turned to Billy. He looked around confused, “Did you not bring Mo?” A completely bewildered expression painted its way across Billy’s face, because he knew for a fact that he had not once told Steve about Mo. Steve must have noticed the look of complete confusion because he added, “Max and I talk.” While that explained why he knew about the stuffed dog, Billy could not help the way his eyes darted to the covers where Mo and his blanky were hiding, then back up to Steve’s face.
Steve looked at him knowingly, then slowly moved his arm to pull down the blanket. He made sure to give Billy enough time to stop him if he wanted to. Steve gently lifted up the blanket and revealed Mo and the blanky from where they were hiding. Billy looked away sheepishly, but Steve only smiled softly.
“Hey, you don’t have to hide this from me. . . Like you said earlier, there’s no need to be embarrassed around each other.”
Billy shyly smiled, “Okay.”
Steve turned the lamp off, and the soft glow of streetlights poured into the room through the blinds.
“Goodnight, Billy.”
“Goodnight.”
Billy put his pacifier in his mouth, rubbed his blanky against his nose, and closed his eyes