Chapter Text
Childe is aware that he’s running out of time. Bloodied glaze lilies sit in his trashcan, discarded just as he was by the man he apparently is in love with enough that flowers are growing in his lungs. He grabs a handkerchief and wipes the blood off his mouth, smearing crimson along what was perfectly white and pristine, before tossing it back on his desk.
He remembers the first few days that he coughed up a handful of glaze lily petals, heading to Bubu Pharmacy in the dead of night. They hadn’t been bloody, not yet.
It’s the Hanahaki Curse, Doctor Baizhu told him. Originating in Inazuma, it causes the afflicted to choke on flowers borne of unrequited love.
He was given three options.
Confession to the person the curse is for, which immediately cures the disease, while rejection causes the disease to progress much faster. Which, Childe would rather die than talk to Zhongli, Morax, Rex Lapis, whatever the hell he wants to call himself, much less confess to him that he’s dying out of lovesickness for him. Besides, “Zhongli-sensei” made it quite clear how he feels about him.
The second option, he actually considered for a few minutes, as it’s simple surgery to remove the flowers. However, he would lose every memory that has the old lizard in it, meaning he would lose about two years worth of memories. He’d be worthless to the Tsaritsa, and so he’s also decided he won’t be taking the surgery.
The final option is simple, and the one he has chosen, in the end. Death.
There’s a knock at Childe’s office door while he finishes tidying up a mound of paperwork. He glances up. He’s got a killer headache from being cooped up inside doing paper work for most of today, and his throat hurts from coughing up petals off and on. Glancing around his desk for any stray remnants of petals he’d been coughing up, he tosses a few in the trash.
“Yes?” He calls, thankful his voice isn’t raspy from coughing like it is at times.
The door opens and Ekaterina enters with a letter in her hands. He smiles at his second-in-command at the bank, one of the only people who is aware of his illness. Today, it seems that she brings something of great importance, as there’s not a trace of levity on her face.
“This has arrived for you from Zapolyarny Palace, Lord Tartaglia.” She says, extending the letter towards him.
At the name of the palace the Tsaritsa herself reigns from he schools his face back into neutrality to take the letter.
“Thank you. You are dismissed.” Childe says, quick to open the letter that’s marked with the seal of the Tsaritsa while the brunette leaves the room.
It’s less of a letter, and more of a brief directive. In fact, only two sentences stare up at him.
Leave for Fontaine as soon as possible.
More information will be given once there.
It’s short and vague enough to confuse anyone who could have gotten their hands on the letter who was not intended to. But perfect for Childe to know his immediate course of action.
He rises from his chair, popping his back with a groan before he stretches, letting his arms raise over his head. Glancing out the window, he watches the golden light in the sky of the sunset for just a moment. It brings to mind the same shade of gold in a certain funeral consultant’s eyes - and then he chokes on a cough.
To be accurate, he chokes on a glaze lily petal that decides to punish him for thinking of Zhongli. He coughs for a long few seconds, getting close to half a minute, before spitting the bloodied petal into the trashcan beside his desk.
“Fuck.” He rasps in between heaving for air.
Yup, there went his voice.
Childe wants to scream and stab things. But he chooses instead to take as deep of breaths as his body will allow him. He’s been dealing with this for four months, ever since he came back from cleaning up the mess Signora left behind in Inazuma.
It’s getting worse, and he has no choice but to let it. If he took the surgery, he’d lose every memory that had that cursed lizard in it, which is about every memory for his entire stay in Liyue. He’d be essentially an amnesiac, missing a solid two years of memories, with only a few that escape.
He chuckles bitterly at that. Zhongli really stuck to his side for the whole time up until the great reveal. And then he was out of his life, just like that.
Childe can’t help but wonder if this Hanahaki Curse is part of Zhongli’s grand plan. Not only did he play Childe for the fool, but to add insult to injury, Childe was stupid enough to fall in love with him prior to the reveal. He was the idiot who dared to hope that there was a chance this affection, this love, went both ways. And now he’s paying the price.
Sighing through his nose, Childe pushes the less than helpful thoughts to the side to focus on the present. He’s got to return to his temporary residence and pack what few things he deems worth bringing on this long trip. Ekaterina will be left in charge of the bank now that he’s being removed from this post, so he’ll let her know. Then, all he really has to do is start for Fontaine. It’ll be a fun cross-country trek for him, as going by ship isn’t exactly feasible.
Glancing out at the fading sunset, he nods. He’ll start that way tonight.
A brief idea of finding something strong enough to kill him while on this long trip strikes him, before he shakes his head. No. If he’s going to die, it’ll have to be in Fontaine, to something or someone reasonably strong enough to kill him, but also where he can be found. He doesn’t want the Tsaritsa to think he deserted, and take out her wrath on his little siblings.
Childe heads for the door of his office and steps out. He quickly descends the stairs to the main foyer of the bank, which is already closed for the night. Ekaterina is finishing up some paperwork when Childe approaches her desk. She glances up, and salutes, and Childe smiles at her.
Then his smile falls, replaced with a serious expression.
“I’m being relieved of this post, so running the bank will fall in your capable hands, like it was before I arrived here.”
The brown-haired woman nods, though she sighs and looks about ten years older. She knows that this is goodbye, probably for good. She’s the only one aside from Baizhu and Qiqi (though the zombie doesn’t count since she forgets every time she sees him) who knows of his curse, and of the fact that there’s nothing he can do about it. In the past four months, she’s run to the pharmacy to get his medicine countless times when his coughing fits got too bad. He owes her a lot.
“We’re going to miss you.” Ekaterina speaks after a moment, and it comes out quiet and a bit watery.
Childe gives her a lopsided grin, though it doesn’t reach his eyes. He hopes none of the other Harbingers are assigned to this station, though he doubts they would be anyways. Other than for the sake of commerce, Liyue Harbor has nothing Snezhnaya needs that he can think of. Though, not that his thoughts mean much.
“It was nice knowing you. Don’t run yourself into the ground doing all that paperwork. Get someone to help you, you hear?”
Ekaterina salutes him one last time, and he turns to head for the doors of the bank. He pauses at the door.
“I’ll be leaving for Fontaine tonight, so please tell Doctor Baizhu tomorrow that I will no longer need his services.”
Then, he pushes open the doors. Once outside in the warm, humid night air, he nods to Nadia who’s standing at her guard post beside the door, and then he starts the quick jaunt to his house. He arrives in less than a couple minutes, and unlocks the front door.
Slipping inside, he locks the door behind him before making a beeline for the lightweight travel backpack he’d brought with him from Snezhnaya. Doing a quick look-through the house, he gathers his extra uniforms, drawings and letters sent to him by his younger siblings, and other things he deems important enough to bring.
His hands hesitate over the beautifully engraved black and golden box that holds the pair of dragon and phoenix chopsticks Zhongli had purchased for him. It’s one of the only things that the dragon gifted him using his own money, and they clearly were not cheap. For whatever reason he’s found himself unable to throw them away. No matter how much part of him wants to snap them in half and throw them away, he’s been unable to bring himself to do so.
He huffs out a sigh and then tucks the box away in his bag. He’s a sentimental fool who still cares far too much for someone who couldn’t care less about him. But that’s only for him to know. Besides, he’s already dying because of those feelings anyways, it’s not like it could get much worse than that.
Grabbing a few travel essentials, he sticks them in his bag, and then straightens up. Time to go.
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Zhongli had hoped that giving Childe some breathing room after everything that went down would help. Childe was angry that he hid his true identity, which was understandable. He’d give him time to cool off before he explained himself to his mate. He would explain that it was because of a contract created before Childe was even born, and Childe would eventually understand.
What Zhongli didn’t expect was that Childe would simply blip out of his life.
When Childe left to Inazuma, Zhongli still hadn’t gotten the chance to talk with the other, and he hated it. But he patiently waited for Childe to return, ready to talk things over. He wasn’t expecting him to look so pale and sickly when he returned from the land of eternity. It threw the ex-Archon off enough that he missed the window of opportunity to talk with Childe immediately, and Childe returned to the bank.
But that was fine, because Childe would be around. Zhongli could find him still, and clear everything up.
Only, he wasn’t. The few times Zhongli saw Childe out in the city, he was gone just as fast as he saw him. And then he was either at the bank constantly, not accepting visits, or he was never at the bank, and the employees wouldn’t tell him more than that.
But today, Zhongli has decided. Today is the day, and he will not be turned away this time. If he has to use elemental sight to track down Childe, he will.
The warm morning sunshine streams down on him from above as he climbs the stairs red wooden stairs until he reaches the bank’s front door. He can tell the door guard, Vlad, is staring at him, but he stays quiet, allowing Zhongli to pass unimpeded. Inside the bank, the former Archon heads for the front desk. Ekaterina, who is always there, looks up, and frowns at him. She sighs deeply, sounding tired.
“Mr. Zhongli.” Her voice comes out monotone.
He inclines his head towards her, a small frown also coming onto his face.
“Miss Ekaterina. I would like to make an appointment with Childe. It’s quite important.”
She shakes her head.
“I’m afraid that’s quite impossible sir. He left last night.”
Zhongli tenses at that, before sighing as well. He turns his gaze away, glancing around his vicinity while subtly triggering his elemental sight. His signatures are quite faint. He hasn’t been here for several hours then.
“I see. Well, I would like an appointment once he returns.”
Ekaterina stares at him for a long moment as he continues to study their surroundings.
“He has been removed from his post here, Mr. Zhongli. He most likely will not be returning.”
Zhongli snaps his head back to look at her, and she stares back impassively, her expression unreadable beneath her mask.
“Not returning?” He questions, his voice coming out tight.
She nods, and turns her attention away, back towards a mound a paperwork sitting on her desk.
“That’s what I said. Now, if you will excuse me, I have a lot of paperwork to attend to.”
Desperation wells up inside of Zhongli. He can’t lose Childe, not like this!
“Where has he been moved to?” He pleads, and Ekaterina looks back up at him in mild surprise.
She presses her lips into a thin line, clearly annoyed.
“Mr. Zhongli. That is classified information. I cannot help you. Now, unless you have some business with the bank, I would appreciate if you would see yourself out.” Her voice is severe.
Zhongli has to tamp down the dragon within that wants to start a fight and demand to know where his mate is. He nods after a few seconds, though it’s a bit jerky, and turns to leave the bank. He walks, almost in a daze, out of the bank, and wanders down the stairs. He only comes back to his senses when he finds himself on the street in front of Childe’s old temporary housing. Fatui guards have been stationed in front of the building, presumably to protect against vandalism now that the incredibly powerful Harbinger is elsewhere.
He spots the distinct hydro-abyss traces left behind by Childe, heading down the path from the house, and realizes he has been walking around with his elemental vision activated. Then he realizes: the traces are faint, but still visible.
He still has a chance to find Childe.
Zhongli turns and races back to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor to tell the Director that he’s going to take time off.
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Childe drops his bag in the hotel room he will be staying in during his time in Fontaine. He’s already been briefed on his mission: cause a distraction big enough to allow Arlecchino to complete her mission without getting the Fatui kicked out of Fontaine. What her mission is, he was not informed.
He’s allowed to do as he wishes essentially, but it’s a bit of a painful reminder that he’s only here to play the fool once again. At least he was told ahead of time this mission.
He’s still itching to fight though. Maybe slaughtering a couple of hilichurl camps would make him feel better.
Not like he hasn’t gotten to fight plenty in the couple of weeks it took him to reach Fontaine. However, today, he’s itching to take out some of the frustrations of being the distraction yet again. And the hilichurl population is a legal way for him to take out some anger.
Heading for the door to his hotel room, Childe walks down the hallways and takes the stairs to the ground floor, forgoing the lift completely. He heads out into the Court of Fontaine, which is a giant maze of buildings and giant, imposing stone brick walls.
As he heads for the lift on the top floor of the city, he reviews the monsters he’s read about that dwell in Fontaine. He’s trying to decide what he’ll give the honor of killing him to, once his Hanahaki reaches the danger zone. Once he starts coughing up whole flowers, then his death will follow pretty soon behind.
He presses the button to call down the lift, still deep in his mind.
So, rather than die choking on flowers, he’s read up on monsters that roam Fontaine on his journey. And there’s a surprising number of them. There’s a hydro eidolon that is rumored to be unkillable, though it looks like a typical member of its species. And there are plenty of underwater creatures that are extremely strong and have caused the deaths of plenty of divers. Not to forget the giant crab that lives in an air pocket cave only reachable by diving deep underwater.
The lift arrives, and he steps onto it without hesitation, a frown etched on his face.
But the problem with all of those options, is that he has to hope that his body can be found before it gets eaten by the wildlife. Which might not be feasible. He needs his body to be identifiable, but also not show that Hanahaki curse in his lungs.
Hmm, perhaps the Champion Duelists would be the better option then.
Childe huffs out a sigh as he rides the lift to the top level of the city, and then walks to the edge of the city. He vaults off, using his wind glider to catch him as he glides in the direction of a hilichurl camp he can visibly see from his location.
Whatever. Time for some bloodshed.
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Zhongli steps off the aquabus that has arrived at the Court of Fontaine. He hasn’t left Liyue in so long. And now, he followed the trail of his mate across Teyvat to Fontaine. Childe traveled fast, and Zhongli never caught up to him despite following his trail intently.
He exhales deeply. At least Focalors isn’t here to greet him. He’d rather not deal with her if he can help it. By no means does he fear her. She’s just a headache, is all.
Triggering his elemental sight, he’s greeted by many markings. Childe’s hydro-abyss traces are stronger than they’ve been this entire trip, but they’re all tangled up, with no clear path for him to take. Well, it seems Childe is staying here for now, if the many traces are any good clue. He allows his elemental sight to dissipate.
Time to do this the old fashioned way.
Zhongli takes the lift into the city itself, and wanders around the maze-like streets. After fifteen minutes, he still doesn’t spot the familiar ginger hair of his mate, and he frowns. Maybe Childe is outside the city?
He turns down a street, and his eyes zero in on the red mask resting on the side of the Harbinger’s orange hair as he strolls down the street, his feet leading him in the same direction Zhongli is standing. Zhongli steps forward, his heart soaring at the sight of his beloved. Childe, however, freezes as they make eye contact, before twirling around and booking it back the opposite direction.
“Childe, wait!” He calls, but it’s too late, as Childe has already vacated the area at a disheartening speed.
Well, that certainly proves his fears that Childe has been avoiding him. Zhongli pushes down his frustrations. He hurt Childe deeper than he realized, it seems, if Childe would rather flee than fight him. It leaves a bad taste in his mouth.
Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Zhongli follows in the direction Childe had run.
He’s got to fix things. He cannot lose Childe.
His steps slow to an uncertain pace as a thought hits him.
If Childe is going to flee every time he sees him approach, how can he get close enough to talk? Is he going to have to try and find Childe somewhere he can’t just run from?
That seems wrong, but Zhongli can’t place why exactly the idea makes him so uneasy. Maybe it’s because it’s a tactic he used to hunt down enemies during the Archon War, and Childe is anything but an enemy. Childe is his everything. Even Director Hu had mentioned how much he was acting like a “lost puppy without Childe”. As much as he didn’t appreciate that comparison, he also cannot deny that life without Childe has been...empty.
Zhongli stops walking as rain starts to fall from the sky that was sunny just moments ago. He vaguely recalls the story of the hydro dragon of Fontaine, and the fact that his tears cause the rain to fall from the sky here. Heaving a sigh, he looks up, feeling the rain soaking him thoroughly.
“Childe, I’m sorry.” He murmurs.