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It was a good thing nightmares came from the deepest, ugliest pits of hell, because if they’d come from a calm, serene place like how Olympus was supposed to be, Percy wasn’t sure if he’d be able to contain his anger. Nightmares needed to come from the deepest pits of hell since that’s what he often saw in his own, and the fear in them could only be created by being of pure, unfiltered evil, slipping it’s way through cracks in a weak foundation and wreaking havoc on the innocent dreamers of the above world.
To Percy, nightmares felt like cold, dead fingers wrapped around his throat pulling him towards the water. He’d feel excited, knowing that he was more powerful in the water, even more so than he usually was, until he’d take a deep breath, expecting to breathe, and instead feel burning inside his lungs. It would be like fire in his soul, and his eyes would snap open and he’d realise he was drowning. Percy had never been afraid to drown until he did, and he’d plead and beg and kick and scream.
And drown.
Percy shot up out of bed, cold sweat on his face. He looked around, expecting to see the walls of the Argo II that always made him feel claustrophobic. Instead, he was in his room, in the apartment he rented with his girlfriends. Annabeth was curled up, asleep next to him but Rachel wasn’t on the other side next to him. His ears snapped to listen to the soft clinks coming from the kitchen.
Percy slid out of bed carefully, so as to not wake Annabeth up, and padded softly towards the kitchen where he knew Rachel was. He felt each step he took added another weight to his shoulders and his hands were still shaking from his nightmare, and he knew his eyes were bloodshot and his hair was a mess.
But Rachel, perfect, beautiful Rachel, did not comment on his appearance. She smiled when she caught sight of him waiting in the doorway and beckoned him over. Percy quickly flitted to her side and brought his arms to wrap around her waist, burying his face in her neck.
“Did I wake you up, baby?” Rachel's voice was rough with sleep and something else and it made Percy shudder. Percy hummed.
“No.” He said, and in a quieter voice, “I had the nightmare again.” Rachel crooned at him.
“Aw, baby,” She turned to face him, the cup of water she’d gotten up to get long forgotten, and gave Percy a kiss on his cheek. “Was it the one where you jumped from the Argo?” Percy hated the fact that he had the same nightmares so often that the question of which one he’d had that night could even be asked. It made him feel sick to his stomach, and it made him feel ashamed. People better than him had been through worse he was sure, and they didn’t cry every night, complaining about nightmares.
“Percy,” Rachel chided. “Don’t feel embarrassed. “We all have nightmares sometimes.”
“Yeah, well, for me, it’s not always sometimes is it? It’s all the time. Every night a dream of cold hands dragging me to drown or jumping off the Argo II myself, thinking I’m a hero and failing every time. Failing everyone every time. You wouldn’t know what that’s like.”
“Percy.” Rachel’s voice was firm now. “I understand why you’re upset, I understand that, of course, you know I do. But you do not get to talk like that to me or anyone, ever. Do you understand?”
Percy felt bad now. Rachel had only been trying to help him and he’d snapped at her. He whined and stuffed his face back in Rachel’s side. Rachel let him, petting his hair softly and whispering reassurances gently to him.
“Sorry,” he mumbled. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. I just…I’m
tired
of feeling weak. I feel useless. Everyone else has gotten over the war, everyone else has been able to move on, why am I the only one who hasn’t?”
“You know you’re not.” Rachel scolded him. “You’re not alone in this.”
“It feels like I am sometimes.” He admitted. Percy couldn’t remember a time he’d said all these feelings out loud. “Like I’m all alone and no one understands me but me.”
“Do you want us to wake up Annabeth? I think she needs to be here if you want us to talk about this.”
“I don’t want to wake her up. She needs the sleep.”
“And you don’t?” Percy and Rachel turned to see Annabeth in the doorway with her arms crossed. “I woke up and neither of you were in bed. Do you know how worried I was? You’re lucky I heard your voices in the kitchen or I might have gone ballistic.”
Percy remembered the last time they had left Annabeth alone without informing her of their whereabouts. Apollo had called them both for what was supposed to be a quick quest. ‘Quick quest’ turned into half the day, and Percy’s ass still felt sore when he thought about the punishment that had awaited him.
Percy reluctantly let go of Rachel and shuffled towards Annabeth. She held her hand out before Percy could try to placate her with a hug, and maybe a promise. “Sit. Couch. Now.” Her tone left no room for arguments, so Percy instead made his way for the couch and braced himself for the conversation he knew would follow.
Annabeth and Rachel trailed in right after he did, sitting on either side of him on the couch. Rachel placed a comforting hand on his thigh and squeezed, giving him a small smile. Annabeth was more still and stone faced, crossing her legs and arms. The only evidence that she was not as upset as she made herself out to be was the fact that she was leaning heavily on the couch cushion.
“Percy. You need to tell us what’s wrong. You promised you would talk to us about them and now you’re shutting us out again.” Percy looked down at his feet, clenching and unclenching his fist to calm himself down. He felt Rachel squeeze his thigh again.
Annabeth moved to face him and brushed stray hair out the way of his face. “Baby, you know I don’t like to see you like this.” Annabeth leaned forward to kiss his neck. “You need to sleep and the only way you’re going to sleep is if you tell us what’s wrong.”
Percy drew in a shaky breath. “I’ve…I’ve been having nightmares. Again.” He stopped, feeling his heart and chest clench, and reached up to grab at his shirt.
“Sh, sh,” Rachel carefully removed the grip he had on his clothes to hold her hand. “It’s okay, keep going. You know we would never judge you.”
“It’s the one where we’re on the Argo. And the walls feel like they’re closing in, and the sheets get too tight, and the air leaves my lungs. And then I wake up but I can’t focus and I can’t find either of you, even though you promised I always would be able to-” Percy’s voice cracks at this.
“I think I had a panic attack.” Percy admits, which he hates to do. He feels it a sign of weakness to admit it out loud, even though all his friends, family, and even his demigod specialist therapist say it’s okay. That he’s not weak, that he’s strong for being able to say what scares him out loud.
“And I always look for water because it calms me down. But I can’t find a normal body of water because we’re on the Argo, so of course, there isn’t a lake or pool in sight. So I just…run off the edge and jump overboard with my head still pounding.”
“And then I can’t breath and it’s like I’m back in that stupid well where I couldn’t do anything and couldn’t even seen my own hand when I held it up, and the water wasn’t even water it was tar and it was filling my lungs and burning them, and-”
“Percy.” Annabeth interrupts. “It’s okay. I’m here. Rachel’s here.” Annabeth strokes his hair to calm him down and presses a kiss to the top of his head. “You’re okay, beautiful. You’re so brave, I promise.”
“And your nightmare was right about one thing. You will always be able to find us when you need us, no matter what.” Rachel soothed him, gently, tapping his thigh softly, letting him know she was there.
Percy took in a shaky breath, and then another, and then another. Once he’d calmed down enough, he wiped his tears off his face with his palm and leaned into Annabeth's side.
“All better?” she asked him. She had a suspicious smile on her face that only became more suspicious when she looked up at Rachel and gave her the same smile. Percy frowned, turning in Annabeth’s arms to Rachel also sporting an odd smile on her face.
Percy groaned. The expression could mean nothing good for him.
The next week, he found himself back in therapy. He ultimately decided, with support from his girlfriends, that going back to therapy would be good for him. Everyday, Annabeth and Rachel assured him that seeking help didn’t make him weak, and that they would never see him in such a way.
“Welcome back, Percy, it’s so good to see you again.” His therapist, Wilma, greeted him warmly considering the rocky start they’d had. Percy had been unreceptive to therapy, refusing to do anything but suffer in silence, until his friends dragged him out of his pity party for one and forced him to get some help.
“It’s good to see you too, but I wish they were in different circumstances.” Percy admitted. He felt bad that his eyes could not focus on any one thing in the room, looking at everything but Wilma’s face, but she had assured him previously to do what made him comfortable, and honestly, at the moment, he’d rather not have to look at anybody.
“I hear you’ve been having nightmares again.” Wilma started. “Would you like to talk about it?”
“No,” Percy said honestly. “But I kind of have to anyway. Can’t get better if you don’t know what’s wrong, can you?”
Wilma thought for a moment. “It’s true that I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong, but you also don’t have to talk about it during this session.” Wilma put her notepad facedown on the table behind her so Percy couldn’t see what she’d written, if she’d actually written anything at all.
“We could talk about your favourite movie right now, or what new music you’re listening to? I’ve heard that a few artists have released music recently.”
Percy smiled. “Thank you, Wilma, but I would honestly rather fix what’s wrong with me then talk about my favourite Ethel Cain song.” Wilma smiled at him sadly.
“You don’t need to be ‘fixed’ Percy, that makes you sound like you’re broken.” Wilma admonished him.
“Aren’t I?” Percy asked incredulously.
“Saying you’re ‘broken’ is akin to saying you’re a machine missing a part. As if you’re useless if you can’t perform to the standard you were created to be. The gods’ aren't’ sending you on quests anymore, you’re not expendable. You never were. And, for that matter, neither is anyone around you.”
“I won’t lie to you and say your health is perfect and so is your mental health and now you can go home. But I’m also not going to call you ‘broken’. Everyone has their own hills to climb and their own battles to conquer. This just happens to be yours.”
Percy sighed. “I feel like that just complicates things. Fighting more battles while telling me I don’t need to fight anymore battles.”
“Maybe I'm a complicated person.” Wilma grinned at him.. “Talk to me.”
And Percy does. He tells her about the dreams he’d been having, how vivid and realistic they’d been. He tells her about the sleepless nights and the nail biting habit he’d regressed back into. He told her about last night, when Annabeth and Rachel had had to calm him down as he’d been on the verge of a panic attack.
When he's done, he breathes deeply, and is embarrassed to hear the little waver in his voice.
“Sound’s to me as if your PTSD is making a return into your life.” Wilma remarks. “Have you spoken about your dreams beyond last night?” Percy shook his head no. “Well, even if you don’t want to talk about it to Annabeth and Rachel, at least talk to someone. Or call me.”
“How do I get rid of them?” Percy asked.
“It’s not a linear process, and there’s not one simple answer I can give you. But, I’ve heard therapy works.” Wilma smiled softly at him. “The long term kind, not the quick in and out meeting you’re fond of. But only if you’re willing.”
Percy sighed. “What one more person to talk to? Sign me up.”
Wilma smiled wider. “Perfect. A problem shared is a problem halved.”
As Percy was leaving, Wilma calmed after him, “And stay calm! You always seemed so stressed out. Whatever you do to disengage and chill, try that!”
Percy fought to keep the vicious blush off his face. If only she knew.
“How was it?” Rachel asked when Percy got home.
“More therapy with Wilma and she told me to destress more.” Percy replied, keeping his voice even to betray nothing.
“De-stress?” Annabeth called from the kitchen, sauntering up to Percy and giving him a kiss on his lips. She leaned in. “Does she even know the kind of things you do to de-stress?”
Percy sucked in a breath he was holding. “N-no,” Annabeth smirked.
“I didn’t think so.”
“Annabeth, don’t tease him.” Rachel warned. She walked up to where Annabeth practically had Percy pinned against the wall. “Do you want to destress with us?”
Percy nodded, not trusting his own voice. “Then it looks like dinner is in order. Quickly.”
During dinner, Percy shovelled his food faster into his mouth than he ever had previously. Annabeth had laughed at the sight. “Someone’s eager.”
As soon as Percy had cleared the table and washed his hands, he found his arms full of Rachel. Percy kissed her hard, savouring the taste of her strawberry banana chapstick and the steak they’d had for dinner.
Annabeth’s hand snaked from behind him to wrap around his waist, pulling him towards her. She shoved her hand down the front of Percy’s pants, undoing his belt and button by some magical force Percy knew not.
She moved her finger slowly over his clit, then sped her hand up, then slowed it back down. It was torture. When Annabeth finally found a steady pace, Percy realised that between the out of breath kissing that was going on and the hand in his pants quickly bringing him to an orgasm that he would not be able to support himself on his legs standing upright.
“Wait, please,” Percy panted pulling away from Rachel. “The bed, please?”
Annabeth sped her hand up in response, and Percy squeezed his legs shut, clamping hard around her hand. “Annabeth,” Percy whined.
“Honestly,” Rachel clucked her tongue. “I thought you were supposed to be the sensible one here. Fucking in the kitchen or dining room where we eat is unsanitary.”
“Percy seems to have fun when we do it that way.” Annabeth pointed out, but she guided Percy to their bed nonetheless. As soon as the door closed behind him, Annabeth had his pants and underwear almost pulled off. Wetness coated his thighs and Percy shivered at the sudden rush of cool air over his legs.
Rachel pushed Percy to the bed and resumed what she had started in the kitchen. Her lips attached to Percy’s, and her hand moved furiously over his clit. Annabeth was over Rachel, unclasping her bra and moved her hands to cup Rachel’s breasts.
Percy whined again and squirmed, not being able to touch and feeling overstimulated at being on the receiving end. Both of his girlfriends smirked down at him.
“Aw, poor baby. That’s not how we ask for things, now is it? Are you forgetting how to?”
“Rachel, please ,” Percy almost sobbed in relief when Rachel’s hand resumed its previous pace with no sign of slowing down or stopping. “Yes,” Percy hissed, eyes rolling to the back of his head. “ Yes, please.”
Just as Percy was about to finish, Rachel lifted her hand from his clit. Percy was about to protest, very loudly, when Annabeth appeared in his line of sight holding two strap-ons.
“Yes?” she asked, wanting his opinion on which one to use.
“The pink one,” Percy answered. It was probably Percy’s favourite dildo because the bumps along its side paired with its largeness made Percy cum faster than any of the other straps they owned.
“Rachel, prepare him for me,” Rachel gave Annabeth a salute.
“Ay captain!” Rachel slid off the bed to rummage in the side drawer for the bottle of lube they always kept on hand. She coated her fingers and slowly eased two of them in and Percy moaned, bucking his hips to meet her fingers.
“More, please,” Percy groaned, shivering at the cold lube that dripped on his thigh. Rachel tsked. Percy moaned again, feeling an orgasm approaching quickly.
“Rachel, please ,” Percy sobbed when Annabeth reached her fingers over and moved them over his clit in time with Rachel’s fingers thrusting up. Percy’s moans became more and more high pitched, and his hips were raised in the air.
“Please, I’m going to cum.” As soon as he said the words, Rachel and Annabeth retracted their hands. Percy screamed.
“Please, please touch me!” Percy pleaded. Annabeth cooed, and moved her hips forward, letting Percy feel the press of the strap. She pushed in slowly, stopping as soon as she was fully seated inside him.
“Is this okay?” Annabeth asked. Percy nodded, thighs shaking.
“Words baby,” Rachel reminded him.
“Yes, fuck yes, just,” Percy moaned as Annabeth rolled her hips. Annabeth grinned and began a slow thrust into Percy. The grooves on the sides massaged inside him gently, making him rock his hips back into Annabeth’s.
“Ah, fuck,” Rachel lifted Percy from the bed and slid behind him.
“Want me to get you off faster?” She asked, whispering into his ear. Percy nodded frantically, making both Annabeth and Rachel chuckle lightly.
Rachel leaned down and resumed masturbating Percy’s clit. She moved slowly, letting Percy’s orgasm build up naturally.
“Rachel, please don’t stop,” Percy whispered as he felt his orgasm approaching again. Annabeth snapped her hips up, forcing Percy to turn back towards her. “Annabeth, please go faster.”
“Your wish is my command,” Annabeth grinned, all teeth. She pounded into him, letting him turn into putty under her. Rachel began to speed up in increments, relishing in Percy’s breathy moans.
“I’m going to cum,” Percy gasped. “Please let me cum, please, don’t stop.”
“I’m not stopping this time, baby.” Rachel licked the shell of Percy’s ear. “You want to cum?”
“Yes, please,” Percy moaned, feeling his stomach knot and the familiar rise of heat enveloping his abdomen. Rachel looked at Annabeth.
“Well?” she asked her.
“I think he’s been good. Let him,”
“Yes, yes, I’ve been good,” Percy agreed. “Please,”
“Come for us baby,” Percy gasped as he came with a jolt, shivering, feeling his nipples harden. Annabeth fucked into him one last time before she stopped and pulled out slowly. Rachel patted his head gently, placing a soft kiss on the top of his head.
Annabeth got up from the bed and returned with a towel, patting Percy’s face dry. “Did you have fun princess?”
“Yeah, consider me officially de-stressed,” Percy sighed. “I’m so tired now,”
“Aw,” Rachel smiled. “I think that means we did a good job,” Annabeth rolled her eyes.
“Yeah, sure, ‘we’ did a good job,” Rachel opened her mouth to retort but Percy whined unhappily from between them.
“Please don’t fight, I want to sleep.” Annabeth and Rachel smiled and kissed him all over his face.
“Sleep baby,” Rachel cooed. “I love you,:”
Percy’s soft snores filled the room before Rachel could even finish.