Work Text:
BAZ
“I think I’m going to retire to my room, if that’s alright.”
“Are you alright, dear?”
“Not really, no. I’m not feeling very well, but maybe going to bed early will help.”
“Rest well, Baz. If you need anything just let me know, okay?”
“Of course. Have a nice night, Mother.”
I walk to my room and get in bed after changing into my pyjamas. I do feel bad for missing out on my family’s New Year’s Eve celebration, but I really am not feeling well. It’s not physical, though, more like terrible nostalgia. Nostalgia for my little room at Watford, and nostalgia for Simon.
I almost invited him to Hampshire, in a moment of weakness, but I stopped myself at the last second. Surely he’s at the Wellbelove’s right now, spending some quality time with his golden girlfriend and their perfect little family, which he wouldn’t be doing if he’d come with me.
I get up and retrieve a shirt of Simon’s that, if asked, I took by accident. I did not. Take it by accident, that is. I saw it lying on the floor, on my side of the room, and hid it in my bag in a moment of impulse.
As I curl back in bed, clutching his shirt, I close my eyes and imagine he’s here with me. Oh how I hope that was true.
SIMON
I don’t usually have trouble falling asleep, but today I can’t seem to keep my eyes closed for more than five minutes. I get this weird feeling in my stomach, kinda like nerves, but worse, because I don’t know what’s the reason behind it.
This is the first New Year’s Eve I'm spending completely alone; I was always surrounded by people, whether it be at the care home, or with Penny’s family, or with Agatha’s.
Penny’s extended family was coming over to theirs for the new year, and Aggie and her parents were travelling to Spain. I felt like I’d be imposing if I went with either of them, so I decided to just stay here for the Christmas Holidays. The Mage doesn’t know, either, he was away somewhere when I wanted to see him. I don’t think he would’ve cared anyways.
It has been quite lonely, to say the least. I mean, I’ve had the entire school for one week now, and there’s still another week of holidays, so. The good thing is that I’ve been able to access the kitchens, or else I would’ve starved to death.
I look over to Baz’s bed. It looks wrong, without him there. It looks cold and empty and wrong. I go over and lie in his bed instead.
I know I’m not the best when it comes to feelings and words and stuff, but If there’s something I’m sure about is that I fancy Baz. I wasn’t that surprised when I figured it out. Somehow it just made sense. I fancied Baz. I told Penny and Agatha and they were both very nice about it, which I was thankful for.
I inhale deeply. The bed smells like Baz (duh), and it brings me a warm kinda feeling. Comfortable. Safe.
I bet he’s having loads of fun with his posh family and their posh celebrations.I do hope he’s enjoying himself.
BAZ
Mordelia came in a few minutes ago, probably to ask me to go see the fireworks with them, but I pretended to be asleep. I did not have the heart to reject her.
I am still far from falling asleep, though, head full of Simon Snow.
I hear my family starting to count down, ten seconds away from midnight.
SIMON
As midnight strikes, I can hear fireworks going off in the distance.
I close my eyes and whisper to his pillow, “Happy new year, Baz.”
BAZ
“Happy new year, Simon.”