Chapter Text
Vox was in a shitty mood, stabbing his pancakes as if they were the face of a certain radio demon. Which was especially unfortunate considering Velvette had actually made them to cheer him up and forget this bastard for a change while having late breakfast with his two best buddies and the silent sharks in the tank around them.
“Vox, darling, if you continue to frown like that your pixels might get stuck and I’m not the one who wants to deal with your antics when we have to change the screen. Again.”
She loudly snapped her fingers to catch the attention of the only other person in the room, “Val, stop glaring at your phone and say something, too! Your flat faced prince gets on my nerves!”
The pimp just absent mindedly waved one hand in her direction, continued to type energetically with another and lighted a cigarette with the remaining ones, “Oh let him be. It’s just a phase.”
“Just a phase? You serious?” She accusingly pointed at him with her phone, “We already had two musicals broadcasted all over Pride this week alone and you can’t tell me those blackouts are good for business!”
That made him lift his head, looking thoughtful, before licking his lips suggestively, “True. While sometimes it can be interesting to leave some parts to your imagination, my art usually works best the other way around.” He took a puff from his cig and breathed out a cloud of red smoke towards his flat screened partner in crime, “Vox, babe, please stop following your kinks with Alastor in public and do them privately at home, yes?”
A disheartening breaking noise told Velvette, that this time around not only the pancake, but the plate below it had suffered from her buddy’s temper. Vox tried to shoo away the persistent red smoke surrounding him.
“Oh, come on you two, stop ganging up on me!” his voice turned slightly mechanical, “I’ve gotta make a statement!” before he jumped up from his seat and spread his arms in his typical showman style, “The blackouts can be seen as a power move! There are not many demons around who could do that! Besides… We’re in fucking hell!”
Calm again he sat back down and showed them a soundless collection of movie clips from ‘hells greatest fuckups’ on his screen, multiple videos playing at once next to each other. He waited a couple of seconds to let his examples sink in before he pointed at them, “People are used to this shit. Nobody has a right to complain!”
“It is not a power move, when the fucking radio continues to laugh even while everything else is dark. That’s just creepy, even for our standards!” Velvette turned her phone in his direction, “Vox VS Alastor is trending!” She frowned slightly, “Get rid of that smug grin at once! It’s not in a good way, believe me and I am the expert here. Polls are popping up left and right and people are betting real money on how long it will take for Alastor to add your lovely vocals into his Overlord collection. They don’t even bet about the if, they only bet about the when!”
Vox simply rolled his eyes at that, even though his left eye started to shift into its more threatening hypnotic version, “Mindless fools. Everybody saw how cowardly he ran away from Adam. Because I broadcasted the whole damn thing! Helping the masses along to see the fucking truth!”
Velvette simply shook her head at that, leaned back and started scrolling through the newest comments on her Sinstagram account, “Oh please, not again! You used that argument in your first song this Monday and he won that one by stating that he at least did fight, while we were hiding back home.”
“Tch… It was not our place to fight. Let the enemies wear each other down, before jumping in and crushing them all in one single well aimed strike!”, a big toothy smile spread over his screen, “Still a pretty good show, though.”
“Better then sex.” Valentino smirked while quoting the other V.
Vox decided not to fall for his friends teasing, “Alastor aside, the whole thing turned out great for us. I convinced the masses that that bitch Carmine lied to us all along. She knew from the start how to kill the angels, only entrusting Alastor and the princess with these secrets instead of her other fellow overlords! Now she is forced to work with us and improve Angelic Security if she does not want to lose face as hells biggest arms dealer.”
Velvette shuddered slightly, “That reminds me how you decided to haggle with the cannibals to get them to sell you some halfdead angel and their weapons just in case negotiations with Carmine would go sideways.”
His screen went black a second longer than it should have been, before a confident face reappeared on it, “It was worth the sacrifice in the long run”, tapping his artificial head knowingly, “Carmine is not the only one who has some big brains working for her. Maybe not specialized in high quality weaponry, yet, but good enough for basically all worthwhile technology currently on the market. Because, ladies and gentleman,” this time he pointed at both of them, “Vees for the victory! “
His smile grew wider and turned into laughter seconds later.
Apparently, all Vox had needed to cheer up was another little reminder that he was actually awesome and powerful, no matter what fucking Alastor claimed!
☻☺☻
He still had troubles believing he was not an absolute failure as a father!
That little clash with Adam had been the sugar on the cake. Nothing better than pruning the hateful Ex of your wife! He graciously ignored that tiny little itch in his heart that felt like he lost part of his past, considering he had known the guy since the creation of mankind and that nowadays Lilith might be his wife in name only.
Regretful as it was that the Hotel kind of got destroyed along the way he was not particularly sad about it. Because in the aftermath he had been able to show off the talents he developed all these years back when he first designed Lu Lu World.
And the best part: Now It did no longer scream Radio Demon all over the place! Conveniently enough the time Alastor had needed to gather himself was the time they needed to finish off most of the building!
Sadly, there was another issue he had only realized after the hotel was completed.
His official reason to be there was gone.
He watched his magic-tastical back flipping rubber duck spit fire once more.
No applause.
There was no one there to be amazed of his invention.
He was back home, being ’busy’.
Because that was what he had told her year after year… The king of hell was supposed to be busy. Right?
Unfortunately, his rubber duck inspiration had left him completely now that he had experienced how good it felt to be appreciated by your own daughter. To actually be there for her…
He would probably never admit it to anyone but he had all the time in the world!
Pretty much everyone Charlie cared about nowadays lived at her new awesome hotel and he couldn’t bring himself to ask her if he might join the club.
Instead of uselessly waiting in his man cave until she called again or her second pet-goat got sacrificed to alarm him that she was in danger.
Meaning he would be there too late, again.
With a big sigh he let his head crash against the empty worktable, wholeheartedly sulking.
Until the moment a familiar ring tone started to fill the silence.
This time he picked up right away, internally proud of his growth, “Hey Charlie!” and, having learned his lesson, he didn’t even wait for her answer before adding, “how is the Hazbin Hotel doing? The place you live now, because I do remember! Did it burn down? Do you need help from the big boss of hell himself renovating, because the deer trashed the place?”
His response was silence, long enough to question if she might have hung up. After a couple of seconds, that felt like an eternity he sheepishly added, “Sweetie? You still there?”
“Oh, sorry! Hi. Dad.” His heart took a happy jump in his chest when he finally heard her voice, “Yes I’m still there I just wanted to ask you if… maybe…”
“Maybe?” He was at the edge of his seat.
“Maybe you’d like to join us on movie night today? I know it’s relatively spontaneous and you’re quite busy…”
“Oh, I’m not! Busy I mean… I mean, I was busy up until… now… But now I have some time to spare! What’s a Movie Night?”
“Right… You think TV scrambles the brain… You don’t have to…”
“Oh yes I do! I mean… Could you please explain it to me, please?”
“It is a form of entertainment we occasionally do at the hotel. The whole gang coming together, relaxing and watching educational movies about redemption while trying to avoid Angel to slip in his work.”
“Sounds great when do we start?”
“At night.”
“Right.”
“7.30.”
“I’ll be there on the minute!”
☻☺☻
Being back at the top of his game he could look forward to his meeting with hells most popular arms dealer to start developing ’Angelic Security 2.0’ which involved not only protecting from but actually getting rid of any unwanted heavenly intruders.
For appearance’s sake he had invited her into one of the pride rings fanciest restaurants, the ’Craven Raven’ to talk business. Even more influential demons from the lower rings were frequent visitors of the place, led by some of the greatest former human chefs. Sketchy ingredients or slightly too aggressive protection of their secret recipes had ended many of them down here instead of upstairs.
Thanks to the customers gossip the Craven Raven was also one of the rare occasions where Vox at least gained a glance of what happened in high society outside of the sinners’ prison that was de facto the pride ring.
He had even seen Asmodeus and his little imp in person. Thrilled he had watched, as the sin of Lust and Val had clashed with their surprisingly different worldviews. Unfortunately, the meeting had been cut short by Val being thrown out of the restaurant permanently with a house ban.
Even for somebody as influential as Vox it was difficult to get a reservation if he did not book months in advance, especially since the staff still associated him with the temper of his fellow V and did not trust him.
How come this week had been filled with situations where he had to haggle with people he did not want to haggle with?
If he was honest to himself for a second it might be that he felt threatened by the strange attitude with which Alastor had returned after his defeat. It concerned him, considering his experience with Alastor way back when things still were… And the second was over!
Vox received Carmine’s message two hours before their appointment, reading it aloud twice, because his brain didn’t want to accept it:
“Sorry, something came up. We will have to postpone to next week. Fuck!” He crushed his phone in his hand, it’s remains crumbling harmlessly to the ground, “who or what could be so important that that bitch dares to add even more fuel to the flames?! Didn’t she say she wanted to avoid a war? If she continues like that it’s not the angels who will fall first!"
☻☺☻
No, he did not teleport over an hour too early and then just quietly lurked around the entrance gathering his bravery to ring the bell! That would be totally absurd.
Lucifer smiled politely, not as if he had been caught red-handed, when a grumpy cat opened the door and just raised an eyebrow at him, refraining from mentioning that there were still 43 minutes until the agreed upon time or the widely known teleportation skills of the king of hell.
Mumbling something along the lines of “Not gonna touch this can of worms”, Husk just signaled the fallen angel to follow him in, “Want some booze?”
“No, thank you I will just sit and wait over there admiring this impressive long overdue new interior design of your hotel!” pointing to one of the comfy looking couches in the classic golden and red snake and apple design he had magicked into existence not even a week ago.
Husk just shrugged and, back behind his sparkling new bar, took a mighty sip out of the bottle in his hand, “Your loss.”
☻☺☻
“Dad! So good to see you! How have you been?!”
Not a second after she had entered the room Charlie caught him in a strong hug and after the first initial shell shock, he patted her back with a proud smile, “Hey there, Sweetie.” Before switching into a much more eager state raising his cane, “Buzzling with energy for this movie night! With you there seems to be everybody here, except… Huh…” He thoughtfully glanced over the by now familiar faces next to his daughter, which he even had bothered to learn the names of: Husk, Angel Dust, Vaggie, Cherrie Bomb, Niffty, even Razzle and KeeKee, who promptly jumped upon his shoulder and let him tickle her below the chin.
Vaggie was so kind to break the silence, “Alastor hates our TV. We actually made a deal not to ever again force him to interact with it. When we told him this morning, he decided to find other means of entertainment for the evening.”
“Is that so? Ah, who needs that prick! Do we have any snacks?”
“I made cookies!” With a wide smile Niffty presented her work and was caught last second by Angel before falling over.
“Ok, so what are we watching?”
Charlie proudly waved a dusty DVD around, “The princess and the Frog! It is a movie made by humans, which some way or another found its way down here to us in hell. I was hoping I might be able to convince Alastor with the Jazz parts, but he remained stubborn. Besides that, it’s a lovely story about a guy turning into a frog and finding his way to become a better person. That and the villain sounds just like Husk and has some cool singing parts, before he gets dragged to the other side.”
“Spoilers, hon,” Angel chirped in, seemingly entertained by her enthusiasm, trying to throw an arm over the bartenders’ shoulder, who dodged with the experience earned over months living with the spider, “now that we all know what`s gonna happen, let’s watch one of mine instead!”
Husk rolled his eyes, “Big Nope on that one.”
Meanwhile Charlie was just a sparkling ray of sunshine and happily smiled at all of them, “Oh I just know this will be great!”
☻☺☻
“So, what has you all riled up, Alastor? And why did you insist to meet here of all places?” Carmilla Carmine let her gaze wander suspiciously over the park in the middle of Cannibal Town.
The radio demon glanced over the rim of his cup towards the two overlords sitting opposite to him, “I have thought about what you have told us and decided that you dancing to the tune of the Vees is to be avoided and not in my best interest. Not in yours, either. Hence this impromptu emergency meeting.”
Next to him Rosie munched one of her finger snacks. She had left the plate in the middle of the table, next to the porcelain teapot, but was currently the only one helping herself to them, “While I cannot and will not condemn my people to take his offer, I have to admit even I did not feel comfortable with the CEO of VoxTech stretching his reach over to my town. We usually tend to be a bit more”, she smirked, “old fashioned.”
Alastors grin meanwhile never left, while he mockingly touched his own heart, “And that, my dear, is why I love it here.”
Zestial quietly observed and Carmilla rubbed her temple, “I will not deny that I do think these inane youngsters act out of turn. Nonetheless in the public eye they might be right. I withheld critical information from our citizens that could have very well changed our status quo against the angels.”
“Oh, deer. If it helps, I think it was a great decision on your part to entrust your secrets to us. There is no need for you to feel overly threatened by the likes of my old pal Vox and you should not meet him with such a premise in mind.”
“Thus, you dragged me away from my meeting with him? Not feeling threatened yourself he might strike a deal with me, that could turn out to be problematic for you in the future?”
“He simply seems to have forgotten who is really in charge. And please do not dare to misinterpret what we are going to do next. I am just stepping down to the level of an annoying roach for a second, which has become too loud to ignore with its childish displays to present it with the truth.” He snapped his fingers, “Rosie, be a darling!”
Carmilla just glared into the camera, Zestials face did not change at all and Rosie gave off her air of elegance, when the cannibal took a selfie of the four of them, even though Alastor only showed up in his typical fuzzy antitechnology glory on the final picture. Grinning viciously Rosie started typing.
Curiously Zestial leaned over the table, “What may be the hashtag? Oh”, he smiled, “a classy one.”
Carmilla did not seem to be amused, “You know I tried to avoid a war?”
“But if we are forced to have one, do you want to be the one in control or would you rather have its reins in the hands of the Vees?”
“Only over my dead body.”
Alastors smile grew wider, “Splendid,” followed by the words no Overlord ever wanted to hear, especially not from the radio demon, “then let’s make a deal, before Rosie sends our message on its merry way.”
☻☺☻
They were currently at the part where the voodoo man tried to convince his friends of the other side to make another deal with him to send their shadows out to hunt down a frog and the girl he had just casually dragged down with him into frog hell.
The mood was perfect. It had been a while since Lucifer had felt simply relaxed, without any looming danger on the horizon, and as part of a group.
Probably before Lilith decided to leave. He banished such dark thoughts before they could take root.
Vaggie and Charlie snuggling with each other was simply too precious, he was so happy for his girl.
Meanwhile next to them on the second couch Angel complained about the ‘childfriendlyness’ of it all. Which did not discourage him from occasionally acting jump scared trying to find safety in the arms of Husk, much to the annoyance of the cat-man and the amusement of Cherri Bomb, the last couch occupant who occasionally leaned to the side to give the bartender some space to avoid Angels arms.
Niffty was sitting on the red carpet in front of them all just staring on the screen, her pupil turning small and maybe slightly creepy?
And, last but not least, being the smart guy that he was Lucifer had chosen the solo arm chair. A curled-up Razzle on his lap and a yawning Keekee on his shoulder. Both seemingly just living in the moment.
The deal was struck and the living shadows started their journey into the Bayou looking for their victim until…
The dark color tunes of the swamp had an abrupt switch to vibrant blue and the ‘666News’:
“We interrupt whatever unimportant shit you were doing just now for an emergency broadcast!” The news announcer was different from the usual ones, having a flat screen TV for a face and a vicious smile while leaning threatening over the table, “That being: Fuck you, Alastor! Nobody cares about your stupid”, the TV-demon made air quotes with his fingers, while his voice suddenly sounded brassy, “hashtag drinking tea with my besties shit! C.C. your taste in men sucks dogshit and consider my gracious offer null and void! You could have had it all but you decided to side with that old-timey prick!”
While the demon continued rambling about why he hated Alastor and why everybody who voluntarily associated with him was a moron Lucifer turned to the rest of the team, slightly puzzled, “Is this normal?”
Angel gave him an apologetic smile, “Pretty much. We’re in hell, boss. Did you really expect we could finish our cute little movie without any interruptions?”
Husk sighed, “Their quarrel has become much more annoying since Adam nearly crushed Alastor, though. Before that it was only a one-time thing, where all of Pride had to listen to them insulting each other for over two minutes straight.”
Charlie remained oddly silent during their commentary.
The nearby radio turned on without any of them lifting a finger and an all too familiar voice echoed through the room in reply to the TV’s insults, proclaiming Vox not having any good taste at all and questioning how he could ever come up with the naïve idea a smart and witty overlord such as Carmilla Carmine could actually be intimidated by his funny little antics.
Lucifer did not pay much attention to their blabbering.
“And now they are singing. Of course they do”, Angel sighed, accepting his fate.
Meanwhile Cherri Bomb didn’t really seem fazed. Apparently, there had not been enough explosions in the Disney movie for her taste so two Overlords forcing everyone in Pentagram City to listen to their squabble was great entertainment, “Wait for the best part, boss man!”
“The best part?”
Suddenly it turned dark all around them. Even down in the entire city, as a quick glance out of the window told him.
Only the radio did not shut off. Instead, it broadcasted terrified screams full of anguish, that made even him shudder slightly. Luckily, they only lasted for a couple of seconds before giving space for Alastors wholeheartedly evil laughter.
The moment the radio went silent, he could hear a soft, “I just wanted all of us to have one fun night watching a movie together. You earned it for all your hard work in the last week. No Killing, no evil schemes, just friends. Or at least what’s left of them.”
The little quiver in her voice broke his heart, while Charlie carefully untangled herself from Vaggie and stood up giving all of them a brave little smile, on the edge of tears, while hugging herself, “I will go and get some candles.”
“Oh no you won’t!”
Immediately he was at her side and, after a brief second of hesitation, unsure how to proceed, he took her into a big hug, “You do not have to.”
All it took was a snap of his fingers for some ethereal lights to start floating around them, giving off a calming golden glow.
To his horror now he could actually hear quiet sobs against his shoulder, “Sir Pentious and Dazzle are gone and you guys deserve so much more than this. Why can’t we even lean back for one single evening? Why does hell always have to be this hellish?”
Apparently, this evening had meant a lot to her, she had wanted it to be perfect but it had just not been meant to be.
Some sinners simply could not stop reminding him why they deserved to burn in hell! Why he had turned his back on them for all those years, unlike his daughter who insisted in believing that there was still some good left, even in the biggest scumbag.
He decided to turn a blind eye to Alastor, for now. Charlie seemed to believe in him and Lucifer could not deny the deer demon had been useful on some occasions.
Conveniently enough there was a second, much more prominent miscreant, deserving of his unfiltered wrath!
Lucifer didn’t even notice the concerned looks around him.
He turned full wings and red eyes and announced with the decisiveness of hells true demonic head honcho, “I will make the flat screened bastard suffer, who dared to make my little girl cry and ruin our movie night!”