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The tide of graduates sweeps Chay along toward the waiting crowd of families and friends. Porsche is out there somewhere, and Kim, but first there are all of his classmates to hug, and Ohm’s parents, and his favorite professors to thank for their help in getting him here today.
He finally spots Kim standing near a tree, wearing sunglasses and a lightweight jacket to ward off the sun. If he’s attempting to be incognito, he isn’t succeeding, judging by the cluster of girls whispering and taking pictures nearby.
Chay hangs back in case they want to ask for autographs. After all, that’s how he and Kim first met. He’s not going to selfishly deny other fans the opportunity to meet their idol.
Kim’s already talking with someone. Chay thinks it’s one of his old friends from university or a fan asking for a photo, until he recognizes Porsche. He doesn’t know how they found each other, but he feels a warm bubble of happiness, seeing the two people he loves most having a conversation together.
Then he realizes that Kim is smiling. It’s not one of his celebrity Wik-smiles, either. It’s wide and genuine, one of the rare glimpses of happiness that Chay sometimes thinks he’s the only person to see. Kim doesn’t smile at strangers like that. He doesn’t stand that close to someone he doesn’t know, completely relaxed.
Porsche twists around, scanning the crowd, and his face lights up when he sees Chay. He throws his arms open wide for a congratulatory hug. The Wik fans have had their chance now, so Chay jumps at his brother and gets swung around in a circle.
“Hia!” Chay can’t resist his curiosity. He’d really thought he’d have to make introductions. “You’ve already met Kim?”
“Kim?” Porsche echoes. He glances back at Kim. “You two…?”
Chay opens his mouth to reply, glancing over at Kim, and comes up short.
Kim has gone utterly blank. There’s no sign of emotion behind his eyes, not even a hint of what he’s feeling. He hasn’t looked at Chay like that since they got back together. Chay feels wrong-footed and confused seeing it now.
“My boyfriend,” Chay explains slowly. He keeps an eye on Kim for clues to what’s going on here.
Kim doesn’t react. He holds himself stiff and closed off, and that feels wrong, too. Kim has been so touch-starved for most of his life, he nearly always reaches out for Chay when they’re together. He isn’t doing so now, and his body language warns Chay off from trying to touch him.
“Your boyfriend,” Porsche repeats. His expression is cycling through recognition, understanding, horror, and guilt. Chay knows what that look means. Porsche is a lot easier to read than Kim.
Somewhere along the line, his brother has slept with his boyfriend.
Only…Porsche has only had one real boyfriend before, as far as Chay knows. He’d been cagey about it for weeks before Chay had finally gotten it out of him. He’d been nervous about telling Chay at first, but the relationship had lasted through the end of university. It had been serious, at least by Porsche’s standards.
Chay thinks back to what Porsche had said about his boyfriend back then. An egotist, he remembers Porsche saying, head thrown back with laughter. An artist. A primadonna.
“You’re Diva,” Chay realizes.
He can’t quite wrap his head around it. He heard so many stories about Diva from Porsche that he has a vivid portrait in his head. He’d been Porsche’s partner-in-crime, a rebellious mischief-maker as stubborn and strong-willed as Porsche, dedicated to hard work and passionate about his art.
Chay had known that Diva was a nickname Porsche had given him, but Porsche had always said it with such teasing affection that Chay had never thought to ask for his real name. All that had mattered to Chay was the way he’d made Porsche smile.
“Chay,” Porsche starts guiltily.
“Hia, can we talk for a minute?” Chay interrupts, and drags Porsche away to the other side of the tree. Hopefully the Wik fans will seize their moment and keep Kim distracted so he doesn’t bolt. Chay can always track him down later - he knows where all of Kim’s guitars are, and Kim would have to resurface for them eventually - but he’d rather they talk about this now.
As soon as he’s finished with Porsche.
“You told me you were dating someone named Wik,” Porsche says. “You’re dating Kim?”
“Wik is Kim,” Chay says impatiently. “He’s the one you dated in university?”
Things are starting to fall into place. Not Kim as Porsche’s ex-boyfriend, which is honestly still hard to process, but Porsche as Kim’s.
When they’d first gotten together, Kim had flowered under Chay's care like he was relearning tenderness. Chay hadn't wondered, before now, who'd taught him how to be loved in the first place.
Chay kind of wants to thank Porsche for laying that foundation. He’d still had to pry Kim open like a clamshell, but he suspects it was easier than it could have been because of Porsche.
“Chay, listen,” Porsche says. “We were just catching up. It’s been over for a long time now. There’s nothing between us anymore.”
Chay knows that. He does. He’d know if Kim was still carrying a torch for someone else, and Porsche is more content with his new boyfriend than Chay has ever seen him. Even so, he feels a little bit like he’s stealing his brother’s happiness.
“You loved him,” Chay says. “You were really serious about him.”
“Yeah, but we were in different places then. It wasn’t going anywhere. He was focused on his career, and I wanted to see you get into university. We mutually agreed to end it when we graduated.”
Chay remembers Porsche saying as much back then, too. He’d been sad, but not heartbroken. Bruised, maybe, and careful with his heart for a while afterward. It had hurt enough that they’d made a clean break, and hadn’t kept in touch.
“Anyway, it turns out I’m kind of a power bottom,” Porsche confesses. “And Kim really likes…”
“I know what Kim likes, Hia,” Chay interrupts loudly.
Porsche takes Chay’s shoulders in his hands and squeezes. “The important thing is, we’ve both moved on. Kim is your future, just like Kinn is mine.”
“I know. I’m going to marry him,” Chay says, but his brain has hooked onto that last bit and is sending up warning flares. “Wait. Kinn?”
“I was going to introduce you today,” Porsche explains. “He said he’d meet us at the restaurant later.”
There’s a yawning pit of fresh alarm growing in Chay’s mind. “He’s P’Kim’s older brother.” Chay shifts his weight restlessly, his whole body buzzing and alert. “P’Kim invited him to meet us for lunch because he’s going to propose.”
“No,” Porsche denies immediately, although he looks worried enough that he probably believes it. “He can’t be. You’re dating Kinn’s nong? Kim is Kinn’s nong?”
Porsche looks as though he’s finally going through the same computing error as Chay, where Kim is one side of an equation and neither of them can get the other side to balance right.
“Hang on,” Porsche says suddenly. “You’re not the one proposing?”
“P’Kim’s been working up to it for months,” Chay tells him. “I didn’t want to steal his thunder.”
“Shit, today?” Porsche lights up again, a grin blooming across his face. “We need to get Tankhun out of the house.”
“P’Kim has been trying,” Chay groans. He feels ridiculously grateful that Porsche can understand how much emotional labor has gone into this endeavor. “He won’t tell him why outright because he wants to keep it a secret.”
“He thinks you don’t know?” Porsche guesses shrewdly.
“He’s been so obvious. I don’t know why he thinks he’s sneaky. I found the ring ages ago. Can you get both of his brothers to come to lunch, Hia? He really wants them there.”
“Leave it to me,” Porsche says confidently. He pulls Chay in to kiss his forehead. “Are we good?”
“We’re good,” Chay promises. He leaves Porsche making phone calls and sets off to track down his boyfriend.
Kim, thankfully, is exactly where Chay left him. He’s taken off his sunglasses and is staring at his phone.
“Hey.” Chay eases himself toward Kim’s personal space carefully so he doesn’t spook. Chay is experiencing a lot of feelings right now, so he vents some of them in a giddy, disbelieving laugh. “You’re not going to believe this. My brother and yours are dating, too.”
Kim pockets his phone. He still looks detached and unapproachable, but sometimes it takes a while for Chay to lure him back out once he’s retreated behind his defensive walls.
“I know,” Kim says. “Kinn just texted me to say his boyfriend would be joining us for lunch.”
“It’s crazy, right?” Chay covers his mouth to stifle another laugh, then forces himself to be serious. Kim looks like he could use some reassurance.
He’s still holding himself apart, but when Chay reaches for his hand, Kim lets him take it. Chay feels relief swamp the last of his nerves. They’re going to be okay. This is weird, but it’s not insurmountable.
“About you and my brother…”
“It doesn't matter,” Kim says smoothly. “We're moving to Taiwan.”
Chay laughs nervously. He really hopes that's a joke. “We don’t have to go anywhere. I trust you, and I trust Hia. You don't have to worry about either of us being the jealous type.”
“I'm not,” Kim says. “But you haven’t met Kinn.”