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Steve is beautiful, Eddie always thought so. That is a private thought for later though, not right now when he is right in front of him, asking to be let into his trailer. Eddie murmurs his assent and walks away from the front door into his living room. Steve follows him. He doesn’t know why Steve is here, on Thanksgiving of all days, but he has a feeling he needs to sit down. Steve stays standing up.
He’s standing there, looking nervous and absolutely like he has something important to say. “What’s going on, Stevie?”
“That- see that’s why…” he says, exasperated. “I like girls, okay?”
“No one’s arguing that-”
“But I like you!” Steve exclaims and by the ruddiness that rises on his cheeks, he didn’t mean to blurt that. “Shit, I- uh… shit.”
Okay, so maybe having Steve hover above him isn’t ideal. Eddie stands. “And… what do you mean by that?” Eddie’s throat clicks on the last word.
Steve has hidden his face in his hands and when Eddie speaks, he uncovers one of his eyes. He removes his hands completely and takes a step forward, almost into Eddie’s space.
“Man, I like you- like I wanna kiss you and shit.” His voice drops lower and softer as he speaks and his cheeks end up somehow redder. All Eddie can think is he’s never seen Steve look like this.
“You wanna kiss me?” Eddie questions. Then murmurs, “That’s weird.”
Apparently Steve hears all of that. “Oh, God, it’s weird? I didn’t-”
“No, Stevie, it’s just no one’s wanted to kiss me before,” Eddie hurries to correct the thought.
“Oh.” And then Steve’s eyelashes are fluttering like he is thinking. “Can I?”
“Can you?” Eddie is unsure.
“Can I kiss you?” Steve clarifies. He steps forward again and he is definitely in kissing distance now.
Eddie panics. “No.”
Steve’s shoulders slump and his hands are blocking his face again. “Shit.”
Eddie doesn’t know if he wants Steve to kiss him or not but he knows that there’s no way he’d be good at it. He figures his first kiss would suck and he doesn’t want to do that to Steve.
“I’m sorry, man. I didn’t mean to be all in your face with this,” Steve explains, a hand to his chest, the other in his hair. “I just realized- I miss you.”
Steve had followed Robin on her journey to college in Chicago and the dynamic duo had been out of Hawkins since July. They’d come back for the Holiday even though Steve still wasn’t on the best terms with his parents. Maybe this is why he wanted to come back…
“I miss you, too,” Eddie decides to be honest. It seems like Steve is being. And he does. He misses him and Robin fiercely. They have weekend calls where they chat for hours but it’s not the same. Seeing Steve even in the flesh has butterflies swarming his insides.
Steve looks distraught at Eddie’s admission. “But just as friends?”
“I- I dunno,” Eddie shrugs. He’s a bit overwhelmed. Seeing Steve after all this time and him admitting to feelings… it’s all crazy to him. Eddie sits back down.
Steve crouches in front of him. He finds his gaze and his deep brown eyes are so earnest. “Eddie, can I please just kiss you?”
Eddie caves to those eyes. He nods his head.
Steve surges into his space and his lips meet his own. It’s gentle, the way Steve presses against him. He moves his lips and after the shock of it wears off after just a few seconds, Eddie is moving his lips back. Sparks shoot up his spine and into the base of his skull. Those butterflies from earlier are dive bombing and threatening to make him nauseous. His head is still swimming when Steve pulls back.
“Wow,” he whispers, his breath on Eddie’s face. Here Steve is, kneeling in between Eddie’s knees, his hands in his hair and he’s the one saying ‘wow’. Eddie doesn’t know how to follow that up. Eddie swallows hard.
“I need you to leave,” Eddie croaks.
Steve jerks back as if his words stung him. “Wha- after that ? You want me to leave.”
Eddie is reeling. He’s so confused. “Yes.”
Steve huffs as he stands up awkwardly, his limbs not obeying him. He practically stomps away from Eddie but pauses at the front door and turns back to him with a pleading look on his face. Whatever he sees on Eddie’s face hardens his features. He opens the door, walks through it and slams it behind him. Eddie flinches with the noise.
He groans and buries his face in his palms. He pulls his finger down with a slight pressure, tugging on his eyes. He’s sure he looks a fright. That kiss with Steve… he gets warm just thinking of it.
“ I need you to leave ,” he mocks his earlier words and pulls on his face again. What the fuck is wrong with him. He was just so… startled? Unnerved? Scared? Scared. He is a fucking coward. Steve Harrington, the extraordinary man that he is, admits to having feelings for him and he runs the other direction, running straight into a wall.
Does Eddie even feel the same way? He isn’t ready to face that right now.
Eddie is laying on his bed, eyes glazing over when his bedroom window slams open. Robin stuffs herself through the opening with grunts and curses. She huffs as she stands up straight and points an accusatory finger at Eddie, who is now sitting up on his elbows.
“Aren’t you gay?” She says, slightly out of breath and angry. She looks really angry.
“Yes?” Eddie states it like a question, his confusion coming through his voice.
Robin throws her arms up in the air in a movement of exasperation. “Then what the hell is your problem?”
“My problem?” He’s still confused. He seems to be slow on the uptake with these sudden conversations. He doesn’t like that.
“With Steve!” She huffs again and plops down on his bed next to him. “Dude, why don’t you like him back?”
Eddie sits up fully. “Robin… I’m not-”
“Not what?”
“Not good enough for him.”
“Oh sack up!”
Eddie scoffs and shrugs his shoulders. “I’m not! I don’t have any experience-”
“He doesn’t care about that.”
“But he’s- and I’m…”
“Yeah?” She waits impatiently for an answer and barrels on when she doesn’t get one. “He chose you, even when he was confused. He came to you, heart on his sleeve and you slapped him in the face!”
“I didn’t-”
“Didn’t you? You told him to leave!” She punches him in the shoulder and he pouts, rubbing the area with a sour expression.
“I needed to think!”
“And have you?”
“I- he’s all I’ve thought about for the past three hours,” Eddie admits quietly. He purses his lips and then scratches his head with his whole hand.
“Then?” A big smile overcomes Buckley’s face. She is smarter than him, a whip of instinct.
“I’ll talk to him.” The thought has butterflies the size of birds flapping angrily in his stomach. He really is going to be sick.
Robin’s smile widens, if that is possible. She jumps up from the bed and heads back to the window, struggling out of it the same way she did getting in.
“I have a door,” he halfheartedly comments. Eddie lays back down on his bed and decides he’s still a coward. He’s not ready to talk to Steve no matter what he said to Robin.
Eddie can’t sleep. He’s restless. Well, his mind is. Steve is… Steve is wonderful. He’s a brave guy, loyal to his bones, and good hearted. He’s always putting others before himself, especially the kids. He’s quirky and funny and so damn hot.
Then he thinks about the kiss they shared. It was perfect. It was everything Eddie ever thought a kiss should be. It was electric. It made his skin crawl and his body shudder in all the right ways.
Eddie groans and kicks his feet in the air, jostling his mattress and making the bed springs squeak. “Fuck!” He curses aloud.
Eddie shakes his head; he’s still not brave enough, no matter how confident he now is about his own feelings. He likes Steve back. So much. Probably too much.
Should he? No, going down that road will only have Buckley climbing in his window again. He has to tell Steve. And well, it's now 1:30 in the morning, he can't tell him now . He pulls his covers over his face and attempts sleep.
It’s ten in the morning by the time he wakes. He knows because he eyes the blinking red light of his alarm clock with disdain. And then he’s bolting up straight because he has to see Steve now. He groans and flops backwards in bed. Shit. He has to see Steve now . He might be leaving back for Chicago soon. Eddie doesn’t know when he planned on returning.
Eddie quickly dresses and calls his disheveled self good enough in his bathroom mirror after brushing his teeth. Steve has seen him at worse.
Eddie isn’t surprised to find the Harrington residence lacking in vehicles, except for Steve’s beamer, but he is saddened by it. Did his parents even come home for Thanksgiving?
Eddie gets out of his van and his palms are damp. He’s sweating like it’s the middle of July instead of midwest November. He reminds himself that this is Steve and that he likes him and he already knows Steve likes him back.
Steve answers the door and the surprise on his face is endearing for the five seconds it’s there. It turns sour, then stone cold, his jaw clenching and his eyes icing over.
“I was dumb,” Eddie starts with. Because, yeah, he acted pretty dumb yesterday.
This melts some of the ice in Steve’s eyes.
“I was wrong,” Eddie tacks on, gesturing with his hands to really emphasize his point. “I let you down.” And there he is, Steve . His Steve.
Eddie can see his kind soul shining through those beautiful caramel colored eyes. He tilts his head back, nodding at Eddie, a small smirk playing on his lips.
“Can we bring yesterday back around?” Eddie pleads because despite the ease in which Steve is now looking at him, he still hasn’t said a word.
“Cause I know how I feel about you now.”
“And how’s that?” Steve asks, a teasing note to his voice.
“Man, nobody gets me like you do. There is nothing to compare you to. Can I have another chance at this?” Eddie starts out strong but tapers off quietly.
“Don’t let our last kiss be our last…” he murmurs softly, fully staring at Steve’s lips.
“Come here,” Steve extends his hand and pulls Eddie into his body. His other hand comes up to cup his cheek and then he’s kissing him.
This time kissing Steve sweeps through Eddie like a deep winter chill. It aches in his bones. It leaves him breathless and he’s pretty sure his heart drops to his stomach. Butterflies, gone; they all flapped themselves to death.
Eddie kisses back with all his fervor, his fingers finding their way into Steve’s locks. Eddie wants to sob tears of joy. He loves this man. He fucking loves him.
“I like you so much,” Eddie says instead, for now.
“Move to Chicago,” Steve breathes on his lips after several moments of blissful lip locking. Eddie is taken aback by the request but only for a second. His heart is back, leaping in glee, of the prospect of being with Steve.
“Yes, fuck, yes,” Eddie breathes back, a laugh bubbling up his throat.
Then they are kissing again, even more earnestly. Eddie is in literal heaven. He never wants to stop kissing Steve. He doesn’t think he will.