Work Text:
Asking anyone, is dating a killer dangerous? Depending on the person, there were multiple responses.
Yes, they killed someone, they could kill you at any time
Depends on why they killed someone
If you love them, sure, but don’t drag anyone into the messy drama after
From your best friend, they gave the response, “You need to stop being attracted to red flags. And no, do not date any killers. You are only gonna get yourself killed.” And did you ignore them? Yes, yes you did. Twice in fact. Dating the Devil’s butcher and an assassin. How wrong could your best friend be?
Very wrong, apparently.
ཐི♡ཋྀ
Example 1:
It was you and Misaki up in your apartment, both of you had that giddy, stupidly in love smile. Your foreheads were touched with that sweet laughter from Misaki. Sure, it was weird that just about an hour ago, she killed someone. But smaller details, huh?
“I can’t believe that I’m holding you, that you are in my arms right now. God, I'm sooo gonna annoy you for a long, long time. Well, until I have to go back, but I will definitely get a visa and-”
You interrupted her with a kiss on her lips. “Let’s leave the planning for later, for now, I just want to savor this moment with you.”
“Right, right. I am so gonna cuddle you for so long, you won’t escape from me,” She holded a smile that screamed havoc.
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Example 2:
It was pouring outside, and you were in your living room, typing away on your laptop. You were sipping away from your drink, when you heard your door unlock and the door open. Hearing it close and a slop sound. You look over at the door to see a drenched Ronin. To you, he looked like a wet cat to you.
You snickered out, with a reaction of a glare from him. “Not gonna help me, Darlin’?”
“Nope, it seems you got it, Ronin.” You looked back to your laptop. Getting back into your thought process to only feel a cold, wet arm around your neck, moving you back. You screeched as you felt your back get wetter by the moment. Nor longer warm, you shrieked with Ronin chuckling now. “Wanne help out now?”
“Yes, yes. God, you are co-ld. Please, mercy.” You yelled out. He was cold like a corpse to you. He was laughing at your pain as he stayed close to you, getting your clothes even more wet.
“Nah, since you wanna be mean, I’ll let you suffer, since you want me to suffer.” You were scrambling to get away from him and his coldness, but it was Ronin. He was stronger than you, so leaving little to no possibility to get out on your own.
“Alright, alright, I’ll help! Ple-ease! You are cold!” You screamed out, and finally taking your answer, he lets you go. You felt your now somewhat drenched shirt, you wanted to change. You glared up at him. “Asshole.”
“Oh, so you wanna still wanna suffer then?” He looked down with mischief.
“No, nope. I’m good.” You got up from the couch, pulling the back off your shirt further away from your back. “Now, go take a shower, and warm up. Geez, it felt like you were a corpse.” He leans with a smile. “No. Go take a shower. I’m sure I still have some of your pjs somewhere.”
As you were about to start walking off, Ronin pulled you into a kiss. “Truth or dare after I shower?”
You sighed, as you looked up at him. “Fine. Only if we can cuddle later.”
“Such a demanding Darlin’.”
‧₊˚ ⋅ 𓐐𓎩 ‧₊˚ ⋅
Example 3:
For some reason, all three of you decided to have dinner at your place. So after a whole grocery adventure, leading to Misaki wanting to grab instant noodles or candy, or Ronin wanting to grab food not even related to the dinner, the three of you agreed. To say the least, you were the only one on task. Thankfully.
As the bags were sent down onto the counter, you guys agreed to have breakfast for dinner. Waffles, eggs, bacon, hash browns, toast, juice, and some fruit. It was your request from the magic hat of choosing, or at least an online wheel you guys made a month ago since all of you couldn’t decide.
“So, who wants what job?” You offered as you started pulling things out of the bags.
“I’ll take cutting things, you both know I’m good with that.” Ronin said he sat on one of the island chairs, leaning on his elbow on the counter. Misaki was jumping in excitement at that thought, you knew he was good by the pictures from the server.
Sighing out, “Fine, just don’t cut yourself.” You grabbed one of your knives and handed it to him. “So you got cutting fruit and a job I’m giving you is also making the waffles. Then Misaki?”
“Oo, oo, oo. I can make the batter! And toast the bread!” She was pulling out the flour, sugar, baking soda, and the loaf of bread.
“Then that leaves me to make the bacon and eggs. I’m sure nothing will go wrong.”
You just had to jinx it, did you?
All three of you got flour all over yourselves. Misaki threw flour at Ronin for something you didn’t really hear since you were paying attention to the eggs. And they were having a flour fight, and Ronin, being himself, invited you to the fight. By throwing flour at you.
By the time the breakfast was done, you three were covered in flour and waffle batter(Ronin did that one as well).
“You look darling as a ghost. Both of you do.” Ronin was the least amount covered, which ticked you off. He was the first to throw things at you specifically. How is this taller bastard less covered than you and Misaki?
You looked at Misaki as she looked back at you, both of you had that glint. Misaki opened her arms a little, and you nod. As Ronin turned away, the both of you hugged the male, making him cover into a mess as well.
“Didn’t want you to miss out, Ronin.” You sweetly said to him. He looked down at both of you.
“Come on, Ronin, get as messy as us.” Then pause. “Wait… that sounded way too wrong.” You see their faces explode into red. Laughing at their embarrassment, you felt Ronin put a hand on your hand as well as Misaki’s head.
“As messy as I like it, I wanna change, plus, it’s my turn to pick the movie we are watching.” You loosen your grip to look at him, almost like you were in danger.
“No…” You softly said, feeling the dread come in. Misaki, who also understood what he was gonna mention.
“Yes, since both of you made me watch Heathers, and kept comparing me to JD. I’m so gonna make you watch it.” He said, his voice was deeply like venom.
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The movie? Was kinda meh in your opinion, but only because you grossed out by some of the overly bloody murder scenes. And you had both killers pointing out the misinformation of the movie.
Example 4:
All three of you were in bed, Misaki was in the middle, Ronin was on the left, and you were on the right. The window was close to you, shining light over the three of you. You woke up after a harsh dream, so you were just watching the three sleep.
As much as you try to make fun of Ronin, saying he snored, was a lie. He was quiet, and the moment he fell asleep, he acted like he’s dead. Barely moving except for his breathing. Misaki was holding you like their own personal teddy bear. She moves slightly but not too harshly. You move some of her hair away from their face.
The smile on your face was soft and light. It was a truly happy, quiet moment between the three. Ronin and Misaki are quite loud when hyper, but who can say? You also indulge into their acts of tomfoolery. You savored this moment until you felt a hand on your cheek.
“What’s rattling in that head of yours?” Ronin was awake. His voice sounded deeper and quiet. Mostly not to wake the person in between them.
“Just a bad dream. Nothing to worry about.” You felt his thumb move on your cheek. Soothing your nerves, he just raitated calmness and love into his touch. “Promise.”
“If there was nothing to worry about, you would still be asleep than awake in the witchen hours.” He grunted out. You felt his dark eyes on you.
“Just a dumb nightmare, I’ll be fine, now why are you up?” You finally look at him in his eyes.
“Dunno, just woke up. Might be because you are awake.”
“Ahh.” You felt his hand move up to play with your hair.
“Why are we awake? It’s like so fuckin’ early.” Misaki grunted out into your arms. They shifted into your arms, like they were trying to get further into you.
“Well, Darlin’ woke up from a grotesque dream, not spilling their lips. A shame.”
“Rrreeaadderrr… Come on.” She looks up at you. “We are here to support you, we are your partners, after all.”
“I know, I know. Just this dream is a bit different. Let me have a moment with it.” The dream was both of them trying to kill you, you knew it was a small chance to have that actually happen. But… You didn’t want them to know. To know that you somewhat still fear them.
“Well, whatever it is, must be dumb. Now please, it is really too early to be awake, and I want to see what carnival fair is in person.” That’s right, it must have slipped your mind. You and Ronin wanted to show a fair to Misaki. You just wanted to be cliche into the ferris wheel.
You kissed her forehead. “Alright, alright.” You see them fall asleep, leaving both you and Ronin away. You look up at him in the nightly light from your window. You felt his hand leave your head and see it pull both you and Misaki closer to him.
“You got both killers near you. If there’s a danger, you know I would bash them, and Misaki would kill it with their rifle. Now go back to bed, I don’t want to see a peeved Reader, because you didn’t get enough sleep tomorrow.” He kissed your forehead, and laid his arm around you and Misaki.
You had sweet dreams after that.
Example 5:
Sometimes, you forget you literally date killers. After all the sweet moments, it puts red tinted glasses on your nose.
It’s past midnight, and both Misaki and Ronin decided to go out in the alleyways. The carnival fair was great, you and Ronin got Misaki a gift, and she won prizes at the shooting games. Which you kept saying being an assassin is cheating. Minor points aside. Ronin is in the mood to kill someone, Misaki is for the thrill, meanwhile, you just want to go home. But, you didn’t want to be left out, and just alone, afterall, it is a date.
You were sitting on the boxes in Ronin’s alley, watching him and Misaki talk. You look back on memories you had with the two of them, they’re sweet to you in their own ways. You look at your hands, wondering how far this is gonna go. And hopefully, a very long time.
CRACK
You look over to see Ronin split someone head open. You could see the poor soul’s head open. But you can also see who it was, it was some hotshot ceo. Apparently from the rumors you get from your journalism job, you heard that he was an asshole, flirted with any woman near him, and cheated constantly on his girlfriend. His girlfriend was also abused by him, stealing her money for his company. Well, luckily for her, he’s dead.
Misaki startled you by sitting next to you, and she snickered at you jumping. You shoved their shoulders as Ronin started talking.
“So what message should be sent this time? Pentagram?”
Jumping in her seat, “Oo, oo, oo! What about something romantic, finish the night strong!”
Ronin looks up with a grin, humming from contemplation. “Reader, what do you think?”
You thought for a moment. “What about his aorta?”
Ronin stared at you for a moment before walking over and holding a knife to you. “How about you carve it for me, Darlin’?”
Right.. That promise you made when you were flirting with him before. You cringed at the thought, but sighed. A promise is a promise. You took the knife and walked over with him. Misaki was watching you.
You slowly do the process, luckily Ronin has told you how to do it when you were writing your novel. If you make a mistake Ronin would just either let you fail or just correct you. If you weren’t literally carving out someone’s heart, it would be another sweet blissful date.
After a quite messy and bloody moment, you had the asshole’s heart in your hand. You hand it into Ronin with both hands.
“It’s not my own heart, but… an offering ‘till then.” You said with a smile, it was sweet and loving, his grin was plastered on his face. Misaki was near Ronin, looking at it.
“I can’t believe you collect these, Ronin. Instead of the tooth fairy, you could be a body collector. ‘Gotta make my own makeshift body’. Frankenstein kinnie.” Which made you snort, not expecting that.
“You mean the doctor who made him, hot stuff. We might have to watch it if you didn’t know.” Ronin said.
“When it’s your turn, Ronin. I have next pick.” You said starting to walk to your place once again. Of course to change and cuddle. After all, it was the last night Misaki would be here. They have to go back to Japan again.