Chapter Text
1
“And then I found out that both of them are moving out with her!” N’s voice was excited as his tail wagged back and forth, “Something something ‘we found a sick as heckin’ biscuits apartment to chill in!’”
“...That actually sounds like a really good idea to be honest,” Uzi hummed as they walked back to her family’s apartment, “Since you guys aren’t really…y’know…eating us anymore. Least that I’ve seen…we could totally retake the city. Maybe.”
“Yeah! It’d be better than staying cooped up in here anyways!” N agreed, “Apparently they found this absolutely massive apartment that kinda needs fixing up…”
“Are you trying to get me to move in with Lizzy ?” Uzi asked, raising an eyelight.
“Not just her! It’s Lizzy, V, Thad and me!” N beamed, “We could all be dapper buddies again!”
“Sometimes I wonder if your optimism setting is too high,” Uzi teased, socking him in the shoulder. “Do I need to turn it down?”
“Pfff silly! We don’t have those!” he chuckled, “Besides, it’s not like we’re going to be in one big room…there’s plenty of empty rooms to go in.”
“And V’s ok with all of this?”
“I mean..we’re a squad so…” he shrugged, “Squads gotta stick together! And besides…I think she’s gonna be too busy with Thad and Lizzy.” he leaned down, stage whispering to her, “I think V’s doing a courting ritual for them both ,”
“Ok, Lizzy I get. Considering those two got like, weirdly close,” Uzi blinked, “But Thad ? When have they interacted other than the day she tried to kill him when you three broke into the bunker.”
“When you let us in,”
“Details,” Uzi huffed, “Spill.”
“Weeeeell~” N gave a toothy grin, “Remember when we caught them coming out of the cabin that night you kinda went skitter bat feral?”
“Yeaaaah?”
“Apparently they’ve been kinda super secretly dating behind everyone’s backs,” his grin widened, “And they both liked Lizzy so…it kinda went from there!”
“And you know this how ?”
“Easy! I pestered V until she broke down and told me off for pestering her,” his tail wagged as he drew himself up with all the smugness in the universe.
“Look at you being all rebellious and sneaky!” Uzi praised, “Proud of you!”
“I’m proud of me too!” he beamed, “Hey! We have a movie night planned for tonight, yeah?”
“Yeah, absolutely, dude,”
“Oooo, so. I found a new anime that I think you’d like! Something wi-”
“Pause.” Uzi stated, holding up a hand.
N seemed to freeze mid word and Uzi shook her head, wiping her hand down her screen as sunset violet eyes looked sadly up at him.
“You wouldn’t have said that…N wouldn’t have said that,” her voice trembled as she waved her hand through him and he disappeared in a sputter of blue hologram light, “N would have said something about a dog movie… dammit Doorman…can’t even get that right.”
She grumbled as she took out her headphones, the pink cat eared things picked from the bones of a place she didn’t want to remember. Nor remembering the one who gave them to her. With a huff, she hit play and music started up.
The shadows around her writhed in time with the nightcore beat as she walked down the lonely hall.
She slammed the door to the apartment shut with a backhanded flick of her wrist, a golden glyph burning over the portal before fading away. Uzi threw her backpack onto the coffee table…not caring enough to roll her eyes as it fell off and to the floor. She flopped onto the couch, pulling up her phone and scrolling through the pictures of memories frozen in time.
A crackling sound caught her attention, making her cast an eyelight up as a purple flash of fabric caught her eye.
“Mind if I sit, kiddo?”
“Chair’s open,” Uzi muttered.
“I was hoping my girl’d let me sit on the couch with her,” her mother rolled her eyelights as she crossed her arms.
“You’re a hologram, you’re not real, you don’t need to sit. Buzz off,” Uzi huffed.
“Would that really make you happy?” Nori asked, sitting on the arm of the couch, gently brushing a hand through Uzi’s hair, smoothing it away from her screen, “Yeah…I’m just a fabrication of your processor but…” She gently put her hands on her daughter’s cheeks and made her head tilt up to face her, “That just means your subconscious says it needed your Mama.”
“I don’t... I’m god, remember?” Uzi grumbled as she sat up, glaring with duochrome eyes at the hologram. “I don’t…I don’t need anyone . Specially not memories of people who’re dead and gone.”
“Aw kiddo…” Nori sighed as she shifted down to sit next to her, “You really are lonely aren’t you…?”
“I’m not!” Uzi snarled, shoving her away, “I’m not lonely! I’m perfectly fine on my own!”
“...Then why haven’t you dismissed me?” Nori questioned, “And…” she reached up, brushing her thumbs against her daughter’s screen, “Why do I see tears, Uzi?”
“That’s not!” she sputtered, swiping at her tears as a tremor wracked her hands, “I don’t…bite me!”
“Come here,” Nori sighed, pulling her daughter to her, rubbing the girl’s back as she offered no resistance to the hug that her mother gave her. Uzi’s hands bunched into her mother’s dress, sniffling and soft hiccupping cries bubbling from her voicebox as she was rocked gently by the memory of her mother, “Oh kiddo …it’s ok…you’re ok…”
“...No I’m not…” Uzi’s voice was small, barely heard, “Everything’s ruined…I ruined everything…”
“You saved the universe, kiddo…”
“For who ?” Uzi spat, “Humanity? If there’s anything left of the stupid fleshbags cast to the stars. And they’d never set foot in this frozen hellhole. Drones? What drones!? I’m the only one left…here…a-and who in their right mind would ever come…here…”
She sniffed again, huddling closer to her mother…if she closed her eyes she could pretend she could smell her mother’s perfume still.
“I hurt…more people than I saved,” she shuddered, voice bitter as the damning tears kept falling. “And I’m still…alone…”
She didn’t hear anything more from the hologram. Likely because her own psyche didn’t know how to answer that. But…she continued to get soft little strokes and rocks from her ‘mother’. Lord knows she needed someone to hug her and tell her it was going to be ok at least.
“Poke.”
Something nudged her screen, making her groan and swat at whatever was trying to wake her up.
“Stop bothering her, you know better,” came her father’s voice along side the sound of something fleshy being impacted with casing.
“Ow. Annoyed glare. Poke. Poke. Poke. Incessant poking.”
Uzi grabbed a pillow and whipped it at the source of the poking and audio gratingly loud voice. “Frick off!” she snarled as she grabbed the second pillow and punched it into shape before trying to go back to sleep.
“Bite.”
Pain shot through Uzi’s arm and with a howl she shot up, seizing the long, thin cord of her tail. She shook the reptilian, golden eyed thing repeatedly as a snarl marred her face.
“You freak ! Just let me get some sleep !” she hissed, “What the hell do you want!?”
“Uzi…language,” her father scolded.
“Bite me, Dad!” she hissed, glaring at him before returning her attention back to her captive tail, “Well!?”
“Gag. You c-could…rel-l-lea-ease us.” came the heavily synthetic, monotone voice from the tail as the beady little eyes glared at her, “Y-Youuuu have been as-asleep for 64 hours an-and 45 minutes. Twenty th-three seconds. Y-you are l-lazy.”
“I’m not lazy!” Uzi snapped as she shook her tail again, “You’re just dumb. And stupid. It’s called rest ok!? I spent a lot of energy.”
“Energy is at 99% due to reactor core.” the little thing stated, “You are not expending energy. You are accumulating too much material.”
“No I’m not!”
“Sys://admin: DarkxWolf17 lying=True. Former Sys://admin: CYN lying=False.” came the reply, “Guilt: Active. Host Uzi is exhibiting behaviours synonymous with ‘Depression’. Hypothesis: Host Uzi feels guilty for ki-”
“ SHUT UP!” Uzi roared, the lights flickered, dust raining down as an earthquake tremor shook the bunker.
“K-K-Kiddo.” her father’s voice sputtered, crackling. Uzi’s vision snowed with static, her fangs gritting as a crackling, crunching, skittering sound filled the air. Her hoodie seemed to shift, her back seeming to bulge under the fabric.
A sunset violet glyph burned on her screen as she let out a bellowing shriek, tendrils bursting from her back, whipping wildly as wings unfurled…
And a hand put itself on her shoulder, drawing her into a hug.
Her anger and frustration vanished as she smelled the scent of cinnamon, felt the soft tickle of fur on her screen as snow-fluff curls brushed against her beanie.
“Easy…” N’s voice murmured, “It’s ok…breathe with me, ok?”
Embarrassingly enough she let out a choked cry, grabbing his coat and burying her head in the dark fabric that smelled of oil and cinnamon and vanilla. Her body shook and trembled as more sobs broke past her voicebox. Her wings and the tendrils withdrew back into her casing, she felt his tail wrap around hers tightly as his wings enfolded her with silver sharpness.
She hated every second of it.
Hated the tears that spilled down her screen.
Hated the fact she was acting like a freakin’ sap breaking down in his arms.
Hated the fact that it wasn’t even really him .
“I’m here, Universe,” his voice was gentle, “It’s ok. No one else is going to see you cry. You can do that…”
“Except you’re not here…” she thought bitterly as he rubbed her back, nuzzling into her beanie, “I’m just…pretending…you’re not real. None of this is real. You’re not here…I’m alone…”
“Hey…why don’t we watch a movie together?” he asked, tilting her face up to look at him as he gently brushed at her tears, “There’s a really cute dog movie I found while I was scavenging with V! I think the title was ‘ Bolt ’. I think the dog has super powers! Which is really cool! I think it’d be fun to watch…whaddya say? I can get the batteries and 85 Octane~!”
Uzi sniffed again as her shoulders sagged. “Yeah…yeah dude…we can do that.”
“Perform Action: Cope.” came the scold as her tail came up between them.
“Shut up or I’m duct-taping your mouth shut again.”
“Give me my b-bow like I asked and I-I will be pla-a-acated for a little bit.” the retort was staticky as N gave the tail a little bop on the head.
“Ugh, fine ,” Uzi rolled her eyes, “Just…chill for a second and let me find one…”
Maybe at least…just for tonight…she could forget.
Maybe her mind would at least let her get some solace in his arms.
Even if he wasn’t…even if none of this…was real.
Just for tonight…just for tonight she could pretend.
Art by Audiarts
