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“Sam?”
“Jesus! Cas! Get out!” Sam scrambled to cover himself but he was lying on top of the covers and they were tucked in too tightly to budge. He settled for grabbing his jeans from where he’d chucked them to the floor at the foot of the bed and pulling them up with as much speed and grace as someone recently caught jerking off can muster. He briefly searched for where he’d flung his shirt earlier, but a quick glance around the motel room yielded nothing and he chalked it up as a lost cause.
Castiel just cocked his head and stared in mildly confused interest. “My apologies, Sam. Do you…would you still like me to go?”
“What?” Sam ran a hand through his hair and fidgeted uncomfortably. “Oh, no, I--you just startled me. Uh, so what’s up?”
Castiel looked around, eyes squinted in a way that said he still didn’t understand what was going on. “You called me.”
“I did? Oh, god.”
“Yes!” Castiel perked up, “Just like that.” Castiel cleared his throat and changed his voice to sound more like Sam. “Oh, god, Castiel. Cas, god, yes.” He nodded and in his own voice again said, “Again and again. You sounded quite urgent; I came as quickly as I could.”
The blood had drained from Sam’s face, and he suddenly looked like he was going to faint. “Oh. That. Well…” He put his hands in his pockets and stared at the floor, the ceiling, the door, anywhere but Castiel’s face. “That wasn’t, I mean, I didn’t mean to call you, Cas, I’m sorry.”
Castiel took a step closer, peering at Sam with increased intensity. “But you did. Quite loudly, I might add.”
“I know. Jeez, I know that now, it’s just that wasn’t my intention.”
“Then what was your intention?”
“Dammit, Cas, are we really going to have this conversation now?”
“I don’t understand--what conversation?”
Sam sighed. “Guess we are. Okay. Well I need a drink, how about you?”
Castiel shrugged and Sam decided it was close enough to a ‘yes’ to treat it as such, so he fetched two glasses and a bottle of whiskey. He poured them a couple shots and downed his own before offering the other glass to Castiel.
“So, you probably noticed Dean isn’t here.”
“Yes. He’s approximately four miles from here. He’s quite intoxicated.”
Sam had to suppress a smile. “Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me. He said he was going to find a strip club, guess he found one. Sometimes we need to blow off some steam, you know?”
Castiel sniffed at the whiskey before draining the glass. “And that is what you were doing? Blowing off steam?”
“Uh, yeah, I guess so. Except, well, I don’t like to go to strip clubs. That’s Dean’s thing, not mine.”
“And your thing involves pleasuring yourself in the motel?”
Sam choked on the second glass of whiskey he’d poured himself and he had to cough over the sink for a minute before he could answer. “You certainly have a way of getting to the point, Cas.”
Castiel raised a curious eyebrow. “And you have a way of avoiding it. Why did you call me here, Sam, if you wanted to be alone?”
Sam laughed. “Oh, boy. Okay. I don’t see how I can make this any more blunt or awkward than that, so I’m just going to say it: I wasn’t calling you. Not on purpose, anyway. I was thinking about you. I wasn’t paying attention, and I guess I just got a little loud. You weren’t supposed to hear that. You definitely weren’t supposed to see that.”
“You were thinking about me as you pleasured yourself?”
Sam took another drink and looked at Castiel with slightly exasperated amusement. “You’re going to make me spell it out, aren’t you?”
Castiel looked at him expectantly.
“Yes. I was thinking about you as I was… yeah, but I never meant for you to find out. I’m sorry if that makes things awkward between us.” He stared at his feet and kicked at the linoleum self-consciously.
Sam heard a thunk as Castiel set his glass down on the table. The next thing he knew, Castiel was in front of him, mere inches away, staring into his eyes.
“Sam…Do you find me,” Castiel looked away, as if searching for the right word, “…agreeable?”
Sam laughed at the bizarreness of the situation. “You could say that. Yes, Cas, I find you agreeable.”
Castiel met Sam’s eyes again, his face an unreadable mask. Then suddenly he stood on tip-toe and brought their lips together in a chaste kiss.
Sam was so shocked he almost dropped the whiskey glass. “C-cas?” he stammered when they pulled apart.
“Is that not the customary response when two people find each other agreeable?”
“Yes. No. Wait, what? You find me agreeable?”
“Yes. I would have thought that was obvious.”
“Not to me it wasn’t.”
“Oh. Sorry. Sam, I find you agreeable.”
“Yeah, I got that. But, why? How?”
“Does it matter?”
Castiel looked half frustrated and Sam could only shake his head. “No, you’re right. This is just, wow, a lot to take in.”
“Would it help the process if I kissed you again?”
“Castiel…are you sure?”
Castiel rolled his eyes, something Sam was sure he’d picked up from either Dean or himself. Somehow seeing such a human expression on the angel’s usual stoic face put Sam a little more at ease. This wasn’t some sacrosanct supernatural being before him. Okay, it was, but this was also Cas. This was his friend. This was the man he’d slowly fallen in love with when he wasn’t looking, who both reaffirmed his faith and complicated it in ways he never could have imagined just a few short years ago. Looking into those blue eyes put butterflies in Sam’s stomach and he was suddenly shy.
“You overthink things, Sam. It’s simple.”
“Yeah?” Sam swallowed hard.
“Yes.” Castiel took a step closer to Sam so they were once again within kissing distance. “You called me. Here I am.” He took Sam’s hand in his and placed it on his cheek. “What were you thinking about when you were shouting my name?”
Sam could feel blood rush to his face at the memory. He pulled his hand from Castiel’s face and put his hands in his pockets, suddenly very aware of his still-present erection. “I was, ah, just imagining things.”
Castiel shrugged off his trenchcoat and loosened the tie around his neck, letting both slip to the floor. “What things?”
Sam took a deep breath. “You were, um, touching yourself. And me. We were naked.”
Castiel nodded, seeming to take it into consideration. He toed off his shoes and undid the clasp on his belt. “Was there a bed?”
Sam glanced at the motel’s bed and nodded.
Castiel followed his line of sight and walked over to the bed, stripping the rest of his clothing along the way. With one motion he slipped onto the bed and rolled over to face Sam.
Sam had to suppress the strong urge to pinch himself at the sight. Castiel was very naked and, apparently, very eager for this. There was just no way Sam wasn’t dreaming. He took a step closer to the bed and hesitated.
“Is this not adequate?” Castiel asked in a tone of voice one might use to inquire about the weather.
Sam shook his head. “No, I mean yes, it is, it’s just,” he adjusted the crotch of his pants with one hand, though it did little to ease the uncomfortable press of denim, “I’m seriously about to come in my pants like a teenager.”
“Then maybe you should remove them,” Castiel suggested.
“Right.” Sam quickly followed Castiel’s advice and climbed on the bed, leaving his jeans where they fell. Castiel reached out for Sam’s face and they kissed again, a little more confident and a little more needy than before.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” Sam growled when they pulled apart. Being this close to what he’d wanted for so long was making it hard for him to control himself. Castiel was flushed and open beneath him and Sam wanted nothing more than to ravage every inch, but he held back, still a little unsure.
Castiel rolled his eyes again and leaned forward to whisper in Sam’s ear: “I’d like to see you try.”
With that, they kissed again, all ounces of shyness gone. Castiel opened his mouth and Sam met his teeth with his tongue.
“You had lubrication.”
Sam stopped kissing Castiel’s neck long enough to ask, “What?”
“When you were pleasuring yourself,” Castiel reached between them and stroked himself demonstratively.
Sam watched, mesmerized, while his brain processed what Castiel had said. “Oh,” he opened the side drawer of the nightstand and brought out the tube of lube he’d tossed in there earlier, “here.”
Castiel took the lube and coated his fingers with it. “You said I touched myself, when you imagined me, but did I ever do this?” One at a time, he slipped his fingers inside himself, moaning aloud as he did so. Sam could feel anticipatory precome dripping between his legs.
“N-no,” he said, shakily, “Clearly didn’t know what I was missing.”
The corner of Castiel’s lips twitched in a smile the way they always did when he or Dean made a bad joke. He spread his legs even further and pushed his fingers deeper, twisting them this way and that. “Ready for you, Sam.”
He removed his fingers and reached for more lube, wrapping a hand around Sam’s length to slick him up. Sam gasped at the touch, and when Castiel helped him slip inside, Sam had to choke back a sob; it felt better than he’d even dared to imagine in his best fantasies.
Castiel linked his ankles around Sam’s neck and threw his head back against the pillows, urging Sam faster and deeper with little mewls and whimpers.
Sam could tell he wasn’t going to last long. He gritted his teeth in an attempt to hold on a little longer.
“Cas,” he gasped. Castiel got the picture. Castiel grabbed the sheets in his hands and Sam grabbed his shoulders to give himself better leverage. The new angle made Castiel’s noises more urgent and when he reached a hand between them he came over his hand and belly with a final cry. The sight pushed Sam over the edge and he groaned low in his throat as he pulled out and collapsed on the bed beside Castiel.
When he opened his eyes again Castiel was pulling a sheet over both of them, the mess from earlier conspicuously missing. Yet another perk, Sam decided, of sleeping with an angel.
“Thought angels didn’t need to sleep,” he said, wrapping his long limbs around Castiel and pulling him closer.
“Doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy watching you.”
“That’s kind of creepy, Cas.”
“So I’ve been told. I can leave if you like.”
“No,” Sam said, kissing Castiel’s cheek, “I’ll allow it, just this once. Just, warn me if Dean decides to come back.”
“I can do that, Sam.”
“And Cas?”
“Yes?”
“Dean doesn’t need to know about this, does he?”
Castiel’s mouth twitched again in an almost-smile. “I think in this instance, Dean would say what he doesn’t know, won’t hurt him.”
Sam laughed, “Yes, I think you’re right.”