Chapter Text
Buck jerked awake gasping for air with a silent scream echoing through his mind and his loft. The silence of the loft was a reminder of everything he had lost because of the lawsuit. As he was struggling to escape the dangerous web that his nightmares had weaved, he realises that it was something else that woke him up, and broke the silence that permeated his life.
The silence of the loft was broken by an incessant knocking. The days following the bombing, the embolism, and the tsunami showed a clear decline of communication with his firefam. But the lawsuit was the final nail that made the rift permanent which broke his family and him. So he knew that it was not his firefam who was at his loft in the morning. The persistent knocking confused him and he was scared to hope to see his firefam on the other side.
Buck grimaced with pain as he got out his tangled sheets and slowly made his way down the stairs with slow and haggard steps. He took a deep breath and opened the door only to stare with wide eyes at the person.
A woman with waist length black hair, almond shaped green eyes, in black jeans and a beige top was at the door with her hand raised to knock. She paused and looked at Buck with a genuine smile and said, " Hi, Evan!"
Buck snapped out of his shock but stepped aside to let her in. She walked inside and as the door closed, they stared at each other. "Mera, what are you doing here?" Buck's raspy voice sounded strange to him, and pulled a worried frown from the woman. That lost voice pushed the woman to pull him into a hug which he fell into as if it was the most natural thing to do. His arms went around her and he ducked his face into her shoulder and took a deep breath.
Buck was flabbergasted with her arrival but her presence brought a semblance of stability and peace which unravelled the tension in his body and mind. But he was also curious about her visit. Without letting her go, he pulled back a little to stare down at her. "Mera, is everything fine?" She merely tilted her head a little with a look of incredulity and said, "I come all the way from New York and you steal my line!" pointing her finger at his face.
Buck chuckles and waits patiently. She sighs.
"I had given you enough space but not anymore. And I am asking you now. Are you fine?"
The habitual I am fine was his first thought. But Buck hesitated with his words. He did not want to lie to the one person who has never taken his words as it is and has always been able to look beyond his facade. He also realised that he needed her more than ever. In a vulnerable yet clear tone, Buck's word revealed his pain. "Help?" And as he collapsed on her with heart wrenching sobs, she was there holding his shattered heart.
With her hands rubbing his back and holding his head, she was a soothing presence. Her misty eyes reflected her pain for Buck's tears but the simmering anger in her eyes promised an inferno for those who hurt Buck.
After a while, which felt like hours, Buck pulled back and looked at her with red rimmed eyes. The woman, Emerald Jade, caressed his cheek with a tenderness that Buck had not received for months. She slowly pulled out of the hug and led him to the couch. With Buck seated on the couch, she sat on the coffee table and held his hands. In a firm yet soft tone, she asked, "What happened?"
Buck started from the bombing, and ended with the lawsuit and the arbitration. "After the lawsuit, the department offered me a settlement of 5 million. I turned it down, of course. I wanted my job, not the money." Emerald knew that. She knew Buck has never been interested in money or luxury. He was a person who was driven by purpose.
"I was offered a job again and I went back to the 118. Bobby... Captain Nash was right." Emerald noticed the shift in his tone and gave a small squeeze to his hands. Buck looked at her with pain. "He told that I will regret coming back to the 118. I am regretting it now."
Emerald's eyes widened with the threat behind the words, and the simmering anger was at the verge of a massive explosion. Buck sensing the shift quickly held her hands "But I don't want to be beaten anymore. That's not me."
Emerald said, "That's definitely not you! Evan, you have never let anyone dictate your life or your choices. What did this firehouse do to you?"
Buck chuckled which was bitter and sharp. "I lost myself before moving to LA, and I tried to find myself here... I let others shape me." His last words were soft with pain.
Emerald and Buck breathed sharply as those words hit them hard. It was a past that shattered them and everything they had built together. But in that moment, as they gazed at each other with a love that had not extinguished despite the distance and time, the broken were beginning to heal. That beginning was the miracle for Buck, and the myriad changes that the 118 were about to experience; changes that were going to redefine their lives, and trigger a pandemonium.