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Bob walked through the dorm halls of the Watchtower like a zombie. It was seven in the morning and he had just been woken up by the telltale sound of the tower’s security system letting him know the team had returned from their latest mission. The closer he got to the common room, the louder the voices became, particularly Walker’s and Yelena’s, signaling that the mission must have gone poorly.
He lingered in the doorway like a shadow, deciding that now might not be the best time to mention how well he had cleaned up around here. The dishes and laundry were done, all of the takeout boxes had been taken to the trash chute and he even got bored enough to wash the massive windows of the common room. Whenever the team went away on long missions like this, he had to find a way to make himself useful. If he couldn’t be the Sentry, he could at least prove himself by giving them a nice place to come home to.
Bob got the sense that Yelena and Walker weren’t too focused on how clean the place was at the moment.
“You put the entire team in danger!” She shouted at him, getting directly into his face. Walker’s frustration radiated off of him like a space heater, and he pushed right back into her own space.
“I made an executive quick decision that saved your life, you’re welcome.”
“You’re not my leader, Walker. You don’t get to make executive decisions. We’re a team!”
John scoffed and rolled his eyes. “That guy on the roof was half a second away from throwing a grenade at our feet and I knew killing him would bring the roof down. In case you didn’t notice, I caught the damn thing before it landed on us. So before you go around questioning my loyalty or if I know what I’m doing, consider the fact that I’ve done this kind of thing before.”
Yelena rolled her eyes and shoulder checked him on the way to grab a drink and leave the room. “We get it, you were in the military! Doesn’t mean you didn’t almost get us killed.”
Bob’s gaze flickered over to Walker, and he noticed his fingers twitch around his gun holster. John turned in his direction and their eyes locked. Walker removed his beret and ran his fingers through his hair, shaking his head before pushing past Bob to walk back to his dorm, muttering something like “Jesus Christ” on the way out.
Bob slowly walked into the room, not enjoying the awkward silence from the rest of the team. Ava gave him a sympathetic look, almost saying ‘sorry about them’ telepathically. Bucky let out a deep sigh as he walked out of the room, rubbing his temples. The two left the room as well, leaving only Bob and Alexei, who offered him a kind smile and a pat on the shoulder. “They are still learning how to work together. It will take time, eh? Don’t stress.”
“I should be out there… helping. Not stuck in here washing the windows.” Bob muttered, his gaze fixed on the floor. For a moment, he swore he could see smoky black tendrils making their way up his arms. With a blink, they were gone. Alexei didn’t seem to notice, so Bob assumed it was a trick of the mind. He saw the Void everywhere. In the mirror, the reflection of the window, and in the dark space when he closed his eyes.
Alexei noticed his uneasiness and squeezed his shoulder. He looked over at the windows and smiled. “The windows look nice… they might not say it but they appreciate what you do. ‘Lena and Walker especially. To them… you are hero in your own way.”
Bob couldn’t help but mimic Alexei’s infectious smile. As the older man walked off, Bob couldn’t help but feel lonely again. The team had just gotten back from a four day mission, and he was eager to have human contact again, but now everyone had sequestered. He hated being alone, but he hated asking for company much more, so he returned to his dorm.
On the way, he passed John’s room. Bob stopped in his tracks when he heard grunts. His eyes widened and his cheeks flushed as he considered what he might’ve overheard. But another grunt later and he realized no, no… this was a pained groan.
It was generally a bad idea to follow any of the team after a tantrum, Walker especially. But after their conversation two weeks ago, Bob felt like maybe he could be more helpful than he initially thought. He swallowed hard and lightly tapped on the door. “Walker? Can I come in?”
“NO!” John’s voice came back on the other side, strained.
Bob knew he shouldn’t press boundaries, so he didn’t know what possessed him to creak open the door and peek through the crack. “Are you sure?”
John was sitting on the edge bed, the top half of the uniform removed and thrown across the room. A horrible wound was embedded in the right side of his chest, only a few inches from his heart. Bob watched as Walker removed the bullet with a toothpick and his bare fingers, and he audibly groaned, covering his mouth as he swallowed his upcoming vomit. Walker hissed and tossed the bullet onto the dresser, glaring up at Bob. “I told you not to come in.”
Bob swallowed and walked in slowly, closing the door behind him. “I should’ve listened. That’s disgusting.” Blood continued to trickle from Walker’s chest, and Bob took a deep breath, walking into the bathroom and grabbing a dirty rag from the floor. “You can’t get infections, can you?” he asked as he wet the rag and handed it to the soldier.
John chuckled darkly and took it from him, putting pressure on the wound. “I don’t think so.”
Bob sat across from him, frowning as he realized just how beat up John was. For a super soldier, he could take a real beating out on the field. Black ash and gunpowder from the explosions covered his face and beard, leaving an odd line around where the neck of his suit started. His hair was matted with blood and sweat, and his knuckles were cracked and bleeding. Bob’s gaze flickered to John’s bare chest, still covered in blood and a thick layer of sweat. When John caught him staring, he quickly looked across the room and tried to avoid confrontation. “Why didn’t you tell the others you were hurt?”
John scoffed and leaned back against the headboard. “Yelena was already pissed off, there’s no reason to make her more upset. Besides, it would’ve held back the mission.” He gave Bob a sarcastic smirk. “We can’t all be bulletproof.”
Bob frowned and gave Walker a biting glare. “I would help if I could.”
“Could’ve used your help today.” Walker spat. “Even as a bullet shield.”
Bob sighed deeply and stood up. “Y’know, I came in here to help you and if you’re just gonna make me feel like shit-”
Walker held his hand up. “Just… sit down. Jesus” he sighed, “I could use the company.”
It turned out Bob wasn’t good at being ‘company’. The two sat across from each other in that familiar awkward silence before John reached over to press a button on his old-school cd player. It must have been particularly old because ‘American Pie’ played quietly and pitched slightly lower than usual through the broken speaker. Bob smiled slightly and brought his knees to his chest. “I love this song.”
John looked over at the cd player and smiled. “Yeah me too. I… I danced to this at my wedding.”
Bob couldn’t help but chuckle. “It’s like an eight minute song, dude.”
Walker laughed and quickly groaned as more blood poured from the wound. Bob sighed and reached over with the rag to hold pressure to the wound. Walker’s hand quickly wrapped around Bob’s wrist as he gave him a stern look. Bob swallowed and kept his eyes locked with John’s. He hated eye contact… but every time he met eyes with John he couldn’t seem to break the connection. “You know it’s okay to ask for help sometimes. Doesn’t make you any less of a man… or a ‘super soldier’... or a hero.”
John’s grip around Bob’s wrist tightened, and he looked down at his wound with contempt. He liked to think he was an open minded guy, but letting another man tend to his wounds the same way Olivia used to seemed like too much. Still, he loosened his grip on Bob’s wrist, letting his fingers graze it slightly just in case it became overwhelming. Bob gave him a reassuring smile and gently cleaned the blood off of his chest before holding the rag to his bullet wound. His smile quickly faded, and he began to chew on his bottom lip as his mind raced. He looked up at John with what John could only describe as puppy-dog eyes. “This is like an inch or two away from your heart. You could’ve died.”
John frowned and shook his head. “Are you gonna lecture me for putting the team in danger too?”
Bob scoffed and shook his head. “No… I just think you should look out for yourself too. I mean I feel like I just got you guys and if any of you die…” he trailed off as he kept his gaze fixed on John’s wound.
He didn’t have to finish, John knew what he meant. Everyone on the team only had each other. He realized that with Lemar gone and Olivia and Dylan in another state… The person he was closest to was right in front of him taking care of his bullet wound. John felt a pang of guilt for trying to push Bob into the field. If he lost him to the Void, none of the other members of the team would care for him like this… and it would be his fault, just like Lemar.
John quickly shook that feeling off of his shoulders, especially because Bob seemed to sense it too. Bob gave him a fake smile as he pulled his hand back. “Just don’t die, ‘kay?”
John chuckled and nodded slowly. “‘Kay” he muttered.
Bob felt that familiar feeling in his stomach as he looked up to see how close he was to Walker’s face. His gaze flickered to John’s lips, and he pulled back quickly, standing up and shaking his head. They had moved into the Watchtower almost a month ago now, and since then his stomach turned every time he was alone with Walker. He wasn’t stupid, he’d had a boyfriend or two before and he knew that he fell hard like this. But this was different. Walker was his teammate, and worse? He had a wife and son waiting for him in the next state over. Bob wouldn’t make the mistake of assuming that he had a snowball’s chance in hell, and it was better to push it down.
Familiar black smoke clouded the outer edges of his vision, and he quickly backed up into the wall awkwardly. He gave Walker a smile and pointed towards the door. “I should go get something to eat… you should shower and wrap that up before it gets worse.”
“Bobby-”
Bob quickly left the room. He blinked his eyes quickly, attempting to remove the void from his vision as he walked through the hallway, letting ‘American Pie’ get quieter and quieter as he made his escape.