Work Text:
Rookie chat (+Jack) (+Liam<3)
04 March 2025, 2:47
Gabi
I want to fuck the old man
1 message deleted
Isack
Gabi wtf
Gabi
You’re awake?? Why are you lurking around in the chat at 3 am????
Isack
Why did you decide to throw this at me at 3am? Wtf is wrong with you
Gabi
God I wish I knew the answer
Kimi
Which old man?
Gabi
You’re awake too????
Kimi
Yeah man I’m studying
So, which old man?
Gabi
You’re too young for this
Kimi
Mate you wrote it in the chat
Either I’m old enough or you’re a serious pervert
Which I suspect you are anyways
Isack
He’s got a point
Gabi
Nico
Why?
Kimi
Oh good
Because Fernando would have been a bit weird
Gabi
Eww no obviously not Fernando!
Isack
I disagree
At least Fernando is hot
Nico is… not it
Gabi
You have bad taste
Isack
You’re a pervert
Gabi
Your mom’s a pervert
Ollie
Guys, it’s 3 am, what are you doing?
Kimi
Gabi wants to fuck Nico
Gabi
Kimi!
Ollie
Oh yeah, makes sense
Isack
“makes sense” bro you’re cooked
Kimi
I mean it does make sense
They’re all over each other
Like all the time
Ollie
Exactly
Gabi
That’s it
I’m going to kill myself
Isack
Noooo Gabi
We’ll miss you so much
Jack
Please don’t kill yourself Gabi
Ollie
Jack! How you doing mate?
Jack
Yeah, well, I’m okay, as far as it goes
I’m not the one up at 3 am
Kimi
Oh that’s right
Forgot you’re on the other side of the world right now
Jack
Anyways, back to Gabi
Gabi
No, not back to me
What about you
Did you and Franco fuck yet?
Kimi
Wait, since when is that a thing?
Jack
No and it’s not, he just wants to distract you
Gabi
No it’s totally a thing
Franco flirts with him but he won’t admit it
Kimi
Damn
That would be like if Lewis would be flirting with me no?
Ollie
No, Kimi, that is not remotely the same
Isack
If Lewis is ever starting to flirt at you I will call the police
Gabi
Wow thanks guys
Isack
No no, I’m not judging you
But Kimi turned eighteen like yesterday
Kimi
I turned eighteen almost a year ago???
Isack
Baby
And if Gabi is the one doing the flirting it’s not as weird
It’s only weird if he gets with you because you’re twenty
Gabi
But I feel so weird about it
Like, what can I offer him that someone his age couldn’t
Isack
Italian brainrot
Ollie
Your unique personality
Kimi
Stamina
Ollie
KIMI
Kimi
What? Don’t tell me you’re suddenly not a fan of mine
Isack
Stop being gay with each other in the chat
Jack
Since when is Kimi like this?
Gabi
I think being sexually active got to his brain
He’s double the pervert I am
Kimi
I’m not trying to fuck my older teammate
Isack
Oh no you totally were
Ollie
Kimi we were teammates
Kimi
Oh yeah
How time flies
Gabi
I hate all of you
Jack
Question is, Gabi, what do you want us to do? Support? An intervention? Give you tips on how to seduce him? Put you in a tower?
Kimi
Oooh let’s do the last one
Gabi
Tf I’m not Rapunzel
Isack
Yeah, Jack, give him tips on how to seduce him. If you can do it with the fuckboy, it surely must work on the old man
Jack
I don’t do anything, that’s the funniest part. I breathe and he folds immediately
It’s pathetic, I love it
Don’t tell him that though
Kimi
Awww
I hope you get together
Jack
Anyways, back to Gabi
Gabi
Honestly I don’t even know. Seducing sounds fun, but I don’t want to get my heart broken
Can’t you just perform a lobotomy on me???
Jack
Don’t think that’s legal
Isack
I’ll do it!!
Gabi
No not you
Isack
Putain
Gabi
Let’s just leave it right now. I’m happy with the moral support
Jack
Just say if you need something, we’re here for you
Ollie
Jack, the voice of reason
Gabi
Thanks Jack
Jack
No problem mate
Kimi
What’s so sexy about Nico anyways?
Ollie
Did you realise this because he fell on you during the Lego race?
Gabi
Sort of
But I don’t want him to fall on me
I want him to fall IN me
Jack
Jesus Christ
Kimi
I want Ollie to fall in me too
Isack
Kimi shut up I don’t want this in my brain
Kimi
Ooooh us having sex ooooh scary
Ollie
Kimi
Kimi
Sorry Ollie <3
Gabi
I am going to jump into the harbour and drown myself
Jack
Gabi no
01 June 2025, 17:44
Isack
Happy Pride month to all of you beautiful bitches
But especially to Gabi because wtf was that
Kimi
It looked so tender
I really thought they might kiss
@Ollie I need you to grab me like this too
And Happy Pride month!
Ollie
I’m taking notes
Happy Pride month
Isack
But seriously Gabi I am so concerned for your well-being
Like if that was me in your situation I would want a lobotomy too
Liam
Is this about the Old-man-fucker thing???
Happy Pride
Isack
Yes
Didn’t you see? They held each other after the race. Nico whistled at him during an interview
Something about his arms
They’re not even that big
Liam
Yours are better
Isack
<3
Kimi
Who’s gay in the chat now??
Gabi
Don’t even remind me I’m dying right now whyyyy
I am too gay for this shit
How do people live like this???
Isack
@Jack how do you live like this
Jack
Idk, ask Franco how he lives like this
Isack
Oof
Kimi
Why don’t you just go out with him once? Give him a chance?
Jack
You okay Gabi?
Isack
Lmao he’s changing subject AGAIN lolololol
Liam
Loser
Gabi
I mean I’m fine
Theoretically speaking
Practically I’m freaking out
I’m not crazy, right? He’s definitely flirting back at me?
Kimi
I think so too!
Isack
Yeah
Jack
I mean, I see it, but maybe that’s just how he is? It’s not like you’re not flirting (which, criminal, by the way)
Gabi
I’m sorry I can’t help myself when he’s just there and all that!
Liam
@Isack this is way worse than you said it was
Isack
Still trying to grasp the full situation
07 June 2025, 19:12
Ollie
Just when we thought it couldn’t get worse it did
Gabi you have to get a grip it’s embarrassing
Kimi
Gabi I decided I changed my mind
Nico is a little bit hot
I understand and fully support your mission
Ollie
????
You know what I won’t even ask
Isack
Why would you rate these outfits so high?
Gabi
Cause he looks good
Sue me
And thank you, Kimi, I’m glad someone gets it
Isack
I think I will sue you. I will get you in a mental hospital
Gabi
Because you’re what, the fashion police?
Liam
You’re not in a place to judge other people’s fashion, Isack
Isack
And you are?
Liam
I’m not, that’s the whole point
Jack
Guys, sorry for the interruption, but I’m about to do something
When we started this chat and Isack begged us to let Liam in we decided to let him get the free card, right?
Ollie
Right
Jack
I would like to apply for one as well
Isack
Omg
Gabi
Is it for Franco???
Jack
Free card yes/no
Isack
Yes
Kimi
Yes
Ollie
Yes
Gabi
Please!
Liam
Sure
Jack
None of you say a fucking word about this
Jack added Franco to the chat
Franco
Hey guys!
Kimi
Hi Franco!
Isack
Eyyy new member
Franco
I was told there was a situation?
Gabi
Jack I will kill you
Jack
I didn’t tell him shit, he looked at my phone in the wrong moment
Franco
Sorry if I was being nosy
Gabi next time you have to be more specific
You can’t just say an outfit looks good
It sounds too casual
Tell him why it looks good
The colour of the shirt compliments his skin tone
Or his ass looks nice in the jeans
Jack
I can’t believe I did this
Isack
By “this” you mean Franco, right?
Jack
Ha, he wishes
Franco
Ouch
Don’t worry Gabi, I’m not trying to embarrass you, I’m just trying to be your ally
And you don’t have to feel bad for liking him. You clearly have some chemistry going on!
Isack
The master has spoken
Ollie
Not such a master if he can’t even get Jack to fuck him
Kimi
OOOH BURN
Franco
Ouch?!
Jack
“not even Jack” what does that mean???
Gabi
Thank you Franco, I appreciate it
I’m not sure I really want to do something about this though
Isack
Gabi you’re in way too deep to chicken out now
Ollie
Don’t be a pussy now
Gabi
I hate you
Franco
I’m still hurt
13 June 2025, 11:33
Gabi
Guys!
Emergency!!!
1 forwarded message:
Nico
Hey, just wanted to ask If you want to grab lunch together? Since we’re doing media afterwards anyways :)
I’m freaking out what do I do???
Isack
SAY YES OBVIOUSLY HOLY FUCK ARE YOU KIDDING?
Kimi
Gabi has a date!
Gabi
I’m so nervous what if it’s weird?
Isack
Then don’t make it weird
Kimi
Just be yourself!
Liam
Just be normal
Isack
Or be weird but in a cute way
Works for me
Liam
It does not
Isack
Liar
My anger issues and lip syncing skills have captivated you
Kimi
I thought it was the arms
Liam
That too
Ollie
@Gabi that’s such a stupid question you say yes!
Gabi
Okay
“Yeah, sure, I would love to. Anything specific in mind?”
Does that sound good?
Isack
Sounds good. Very normal
Liam
Yeah that’s fine
Kimi
Add a winky face for flirt factor
Ollie
Don’t add a winky face, might as well say “you want to eat me?”
Gabi
But I do want him to eat me :(
Liam
Ew
Kimi
In a sexy way or cannibalistic way?
Gabi
…
Both
Ollie
Why are all of you so weird?
Gabi
Okay he texted back
Looks like I have a lunch date!
Kimi
Yay!
Good luck!
Isack
Yeah good luck
And tell us everything afterwards, okay? I want to know exactly how it went
Ollie
Yes please!
13 June 2025, 13:02
Gabi
That was such a bad idea
Kimi
Why? Was it bad
Gabi
No
It was great
That’s the problem
I want him to want me so bad
I’m turned on and mad about it
Isack
“I’m turned on and mad about it” is so relatable though
2025 driver’s group chat (only professional matters!)
Kimi Antonelli
Gabi maybe you should rethink if the old man is worth all the trouble. I mean he’s hot but not that hot
Isack Hadjar
KIMI WRONG CHAT
2 messages deleted
Kimi Antonelli
Sorry for that, please ignore it :)
Rookie chat (+Jack) (+Liam<3) (+Franco)
Gabi
Kimi I will kill you
And this time I mean it
Isack
Kimi you fucked up
Kimi
Maybe nobody saw it??
Gabi
I WOULD HOPE SO
One of these days I will die of stress
You can tell him at my funeral
Isack
One last question though?
Does it turn you on when he calls you Gabriella?
Gabi
YES
Isack
Ha! I knew it!
Gabi
I’m done at this point
14 June 2025, 10:47
Gabi
I just had the most awkward conversation with Lance about Kimi’s message from yesterday
Apparently he saw it and he wanted to make sure it’s not about Fernando
Franco
Not you trying to steal his man
Gabi
He then proceeded to say “I’m not so much worried about this, but Nando is, because of your professional relationship”
I’m cooked
Properly
Ollie
So people know?
Franco
Oh yeah
Pierre asked me about this
Lance saw it and he told Fernando and Esteban, and Esteban told Pierre, and Pierre will probably tell Charles and/or Yuki and so it goes round
Gabi
The lobotomy is not enough
I need an execution
Preferably for Kimi and then myself
Kimi
I already said I’m sorry what am I supposed to do???
Gabi
I don’t know, tell them it was a joke!
Franco
There are a lot of old men in the world, Gabi, Nico will not find out
And you can always deny it
Ollie
Yeah just gaslight him
Also don’t kill my boyfriend please
Kimi
George asked me what I wrote in the chat and I panicked
I just said it was private
Gabi
Well it WAS private
I will never tell you anything ever again
19 June 2025, 23:02
Ollie
“I believe we were made to be together” GABI PLEASE GET A GRIP I BEG YOU
Isack
This is ridiculous
Gabi
I think he knows something
I’m scared
Jack
Wouldn’t surprise me because what the actual fuck, Gabi?
Liam
He just deadass said “we’re soulmates” for the whole world to see
Isack
You think we were not made to be together???
Liam
Oh no we definitely were
But I wouldn’t say that during a PR video
Isack
Fair enough
Kimi
There needs to be a separate category for rookie of the year
Like normal and gay
Jack
We’re all gay somehow
Ollie
Back when I first realized I’m gay I freaked out but then I thought “it’s statistically impossible I’m the only one, so I’ll be fine” and then I ended up with a bunch of gay guys
Isack
More gays than in the gay club
Kimi
I honestly regret saying that Gabi would be the least gay
Because right now we could start having sex on the podium and it would still be less gay than whatever he’s doing
Gabi
First of all, fuck you
Second of all, I don’t know why I said that
Ollie
It’s not gay panic it’s gay bliss
Liam
Lol
29 June 2025, 17:32
Kimi
Congratulations Gabi!
On the points and on getting Nico in a towel
Isack
He was seriously in a towel only?
Ollie
I don’t think he had anything on under that towel
Liam
Honestly, I respect the balls on that man
I would die from embarrassment
Gabi
Hdjdbdjilowqao
Don’t even try to talk to me right now
I was praying for that towel to fall so hard
Isack
I was praying for that towel to fall so hard
There I fixed your sentence
Kimi
Lmao
The way he first flinched away was way funnier
Like we all know how down bad you are, why are you pretending?
Gabi
I WAS TRYING
Jack
If this wasn’t on camera I wouldn’t believe it
Ollie
Same
Liam
Can I just ask why we came to the conclusion that Nico had no interest at all?
Gabi
What?
Kimi
Huh?
Ollie
Wdym?
Liam
Well, we’re talking about a guy who said he’d suck someone’s balls on live
Twice
With a guy who later became his teammate
Who flirts with Gabi all the time
I swear if you pull out that joke “would you suck my balls too?” he’ll laugh and say “sure”
And I’m beginning to think he’d actually do it
Just saying, he’s clearly comfortable with making sex jokes and flirting with guys
And he could just be comfortable
But then again, why shouldn’t he actually be queer and potentially interested in Gabi?
I mean, Gabi’s not not attractive
So instead of assuming “he could never like me!”, I would just find it interesting what you have to actually back that statement up
Jack
Wow
Isack
Calling Gabi not not attractive was uncalled for
But I actually agree with the rest
Ollie
I do see what you mean
Gabi
No
Fuck you
Don’t get my hopes up
I will die of heart break
Jack
What about the age gap though?
Liam
What about it? Gabi is an adult, he didn’t turn 18 yesterday
Lance and Fernando pull it off too, they seem pretty happy to me. I don’t think it’s impossible
As long as you’re aware of the problems that might come up
Communication is key, as with everything else
Trust your gut
Gabi
Yeah but Lance and Fernando are deranged
You never had to sit with them through a car ride
I swear to god they are the worst
Isack
Said the one who keeps flirting with his older teammate like he’s not absolutely deranged
Gabi
Bitch
Isack
Bitch yourself
04 June 2025, 23:43
Kimi
Hear me out
Nico in a towel doing a lap dance on Gabi
Isack
KIMI
Ollie
Kimi…
Liam
We have qualifying tomorrow and that’s what’s keeping you up?
Is that what you’re thinking about on a regular basis or…?
Kimi
Pretty much
Do you see the vision though???
Jack
Oh my god
Franco
How did I not know that Kimi is like this? He looks so innocent
Ollie
Looks can be deceiving
And they are in his case
Kimi
??? Stop pretending I’m the devil or something
It just popped up in my head
With Gabi all red and flustered
Gabi
@Ollie Are you SURE you want to keep him?
Ollie
Yes
As stupid as he is I find it quite endearing
Plus, it’s entertaining. The day I’m bored is the day Kimi isn’t there
Kimi
Awww
I love you baby!
Ollie
I love you too
Kimi
Can somebody answer my question now?
Isack
No wonder you agree Nico is hot if that’s what you’re thinking all day
Kimi
Not all day! Just sometimes
Franco
Why are we all up thinking about this now
My life is a nightmare
Jack
Okay person who is still sitting in my seat
Franco
Except for Jack, Jack is the light of my life <3
Liam
Ew
Isack
You tell them babe
Gabi
Ew
Jack
Shut up all of you
Ollie
As terrifying as it is, I see the vision
Gabi would die right then and there
Kimi
Yeah probably
It’s part of the vision
Gabi
Well I hate the vision
Isack
Your autocorrect put “hate” instead of “love”
Gabi
And you are the worst of all of them somehow
French bastard
Isack
Hey!
06 July 2025, 10:23
Gabi
I am upset for no reason whatsoever
Ollie
Why??
Gabi
Because Magnussen is here
He was invited
By Nico
I’m jealous
Kimi
Lol
Gabi
Don’t lol me!
It’s so stupid to be upset about this
But I am
Isack
Poor poor Gabi
Gabi
Fuck you guys
Kimi
No, Gabi, we’re not making fun of you!
I get it, I get jealous too. It always feels stupid
Gabi
It’s just that they have history together
I feel like a jealous girlfriend
I actually might have feelings for Nico
Real feelings
Isack
Oh god it’s even worse than we thought
Gabi
Ha ha
I will now stop sulking
Kimi
Just remember to come to him first after the race
Be the first face he sees when he steps out of the car
Gabi
Oh believe me I will!
06 July 2025, 18:11
Isack
Are Nico and Gabi going to fuck nasty today? Answer: yes/probably/yes again/how is that a question?
Liam
But honestly, how is that a question?
Kimi
They deserve it
Podium sex is amazing
Isack
Yeah keep rubbing it in you Mercedes-driving fuck
Ollie
You’re just jealous
Isack
Yeah, obviously??? I mean, good for you and all, I still love and support you, but ???
Liam
Calm your ass down
At that rate you’ll sit in the RedBull quicker than you can even say “promotion”
Isack
Is it a promotion though?
I don’t want to drive at RedBull!
Ollie
But in all honesty so much respect for Nico and Sauber
I need to watch the race in retrospective because that was amazing
Liam
I agree. You think a congratulations text is too much or not personal enough?
Franco
I think it’s fine. You’re not close to him after all, but why not write a message? It was pretty cool
Kimi
@Gabi You very distracted at the moment?
Ollie
Omg did you guys see when Gabi sprinted to Nico as soon as he parked his car?
Isack
Did you guys see the video Sauber posted where Gabi literally kisses Nico???
Kimi
WHAT?
Isack
On the cheek! But still
Franco
Everybody loved Nico on the podium
Liam
Fr
The underdog got what he deserved after all
06 July 2025, 23:02
Gabi
GUYS
I THINK IT’S HAPPENING
NICO IS WITH ME
IN MY HOTEL ROOM
HE JUST WENT TO THE BATHROOM BUT HOLY FUCK
Kimi
I thought you were going to party more after a podium
Gabi
WE WERE BUT THEN HE SAID HE WANTED TO CELEBRATE WITH ME PERSONALLY
Isack
OH MY GOD IT’S HAPPENING
STAY CALM
YOU HAVE CONDOMS?
Gabi
YES
wait that’s not what I’m supposed to think about
ISACK
Isack
Oh you definitely should think about using protection
Gabi
THAT IS NOT WHAT’S HAPPENING
I’LL CATCH YOU LATER
Kimi
This is absolutely what’s happening, no?
Ollie
Yeah
Franco
Yeah
Liam
Oh, definitely
07 June 2025, 10:16
Isack
@Gabi I’M DYING PLEASE just drop the tea!
I need to know what happened yesterday!!!
Kimi
Same! I’m so curious
Liam
I am ashamed to admit even I am
Ollie
@Gabi please tell us
Gabi
Well we went back to the hotel
And we talked for quite a long time
Let’s say we got a lot closer ;)
Isack
Oh my god
Kimi
Did you kiss!?
Isack
Did you fuck!?
Kimi
Was he good?
Gabi
I don’t kiss and tell :)
Isack
WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS
Kimi
Did he eat you?
Gabi
Maybe?
Liam
In the sexy or cannibalistic way?
Kimi
Or both, how you wanted?
Gabi
Oh, did he want that?
Liam
Guys
Kimi
I mean, it’s what you said
Gabi
Uh hu. Interesting.
Liam
@Gabi Nico it’s very impolite to snoop around in other people’s phones, even if you did spend the night with them
And answer for them in a group chat, even if that chat is very unserious
Isack
NICO???
Gabi
Ooof caught me there
Sorry guys
How did you figure it out so quickly?
Liam
Gabi never uses emojis of any kind
He just sends stupid stickers
Plus I’m not sure he knows the phrase kiss and tell
He’s not that eloquent in English
And who else should be on his phone right now
Congratulations on the podium btw
Isack
God you’re so smart babe
Gabi
Thank you Liam :)
My apologies for intruding, but when I saw that you were pestering him about us I couldn’t resist.
He’s in the shower right now.
Isack
WE’RE pestering HIM?
HE’S THE ONE WHO STARTED IT
Gabi
But I am curious
Was I the old man Kimi wrote in the group chat about?
That Gabi should rethink if the troubles are worth it because he’s hot but not that hot?
Isack
Oh yeah he really fucked that up
Kimi
I did
Gabi
Okay! I was almost convinced it couldn’t be true
Good to know :)
Kimi
Wait was this just a one time thing though or are you guys a thing now?
Gabi
We agreed to start dating and see where it goes from here ;)
Liam
I told you guys it’s not that far fetched!
Kimi
YES!
Ollie
That’s amazing! I wish you all the best!
Gabi
Thanks!
Isack
Nico I swear if you fuck it up I will drown you in the sea
It’s ridiculous how much he likes you
I mean even though we mainly talked about how horny he is for you
But he actually likes you
Kimi
Yeah
You treat him right or this will become the murder chat
Gabi doesn’t deserve anything less than princess treatment
Gabi
Alright, I get it!
Wouldn’t dare to treat him any less like a princess anyways ;)
Isack
Then we’re good!
Kimi
Did you fuck though?
Ollie
KIMI!
Kimi
What???