Chapter Text
The after show adrenaline felt even more intense than usual, Rumi thought as she watched the world fly by the window of their car. They'd finally slipped out of the venue a few minutes ago, finally heading home to have a break before the next Idol Awards, and Rumi felt like she was vibrating with leftover energy.
Mira and Zoey were on either side of her, both alpha's protectively pressed against her. They got like that after the intensity of their shows. Zoey was curled into her side, playing with her fingers as she rambled about the last documentary she watched while Mira was looking out the window with one hand resting gently against the back of Rumi's neck, her thumb brushing back and forth in an anchoring motion that she knew was more for Mira to know she was there and okay.
Everything felt charged, their touch sending sparks through her limbs. Touch had always been craved but kept at a distance, Celine's lessons burned into her mind. Now, though? Now that she'd learned some things?
Now that she'd gone off her suppressants?
Rumi was starting to crave it all the time.
She was taking it slow, though, since she still hadn't explained things to the alpha's beside her. The break they would now be on was when she planned to tell them, having slowly stopped her suppressants over the entirety of the tour so any side effects would hit at just the right time for this break.
Ever since she'd started lowering the doses, every fleeting touch, every hand held, every time their shoulders brushed, Rumi felt like her knees might buckle. It felt like too much and not enough all at once, every time. As if her body craved it, was finally getting something she'd been missing, but she didn't know how to process it.
Hopefully it would get better after she talked to them.
Hopefully they didn't hate her when she did.
Rumi blinked that thought away, focusing back in on the way their warmth felt. It wouldn't be good to panic in the car. Mira seemed to sense something was off anyway, tilting her head to give Rumi a slightly concerned look.
Instead of saying anything, Rumi just leaned her head against Mira's shoulder, closing her eyes when the hand on her neck started to rub more firmly. The purr that slipped from her then was more omega than beta but with the sounds of Zoey's happy rambling and the low hum of the radio, it didn't seem like Mira noticed.
"Can we watch it tonight?" Rumi realized Zoey had lowered her voice, probably thinking she'd fallen asleep. Mira didn't correct the thought, instead just angling her body to cradle Rumi more comfortably against her side. The move made Zoey cuddle even closer as well and that purr deepened, sounding more like the beta-like one she'd learned to perfect over the years.
"Yeah, we can. Sounds like the perfect thing to relax on the couch to." She had no idea what they were talking about, having missed the last bit of Zoey's ramble.
"Is she okay?"
"Mh, I think so. She didn't say anything before she got comfortable."
"Her hands are still trembling and she's kinda warm. You don't think she got sick on tour, do you?"
"She's been acting fine so I think it's just the after show buzz. I'm honestly surprised she's resting right now."
Zoey giggled at that, the sound bringing a smile to Rumi's lips against her will. That got her a gasp and then Zoey was shaking her gently, nuzzling up against her shoulder.
"Ruuumi, I see you!" Slowly, she let her eyes blink open, giving Zoey a playful wink. "Sneaky! I thought you fell asleep."
"No, not sleeping. Post-show brain fog is hitting me pretty hard though." Mira hummed softly at that, moving her hand down to rub along her arm. The touch through her jacket wasn't as electric and a part of Rumi wanted to whimper at the loss of sensation. "I'll be fine when we get home. I think I might just take a really long shower before crashing."
"No couch time?" The puppy eyes Zoey sent her were lethal but Rumi stopped them by shorting out her brain with a forehead kiss. Both alpha's scents spiked for a moment and to be sure Mira didn't feel left out, Rumi tilted her head to kiss the side of her jaw as well.
"Not tonight. But I-" She hesitated but then both alpha's rumbled softly at her, encouraging. "Tomorrow, uhm, I want to talk about something important. So maybe couch tomorrow after that?"
"That depends." There was a groan in Mira's voice that had Rumi's brow furrowing. "Is it a work something to talk about that's going to shorten our break?"
"Oh." Rumi chuckled and then kissed Mira's jaw again. "No, no, I promise, nothing will shorten the break. It's a personal talk. About me."
Mira and Zoey locked gazes around her, the moment doing nothing to ease Rumi's sudden nerves, but then they rumbled a little louder, both nuzzling at her to scent her. It soothed her mind, the whole world pinpointing down to just them.
"Of course! You can tell us anything, Rumi. Anytime you want."
"You don't want to talk about it tonight?"
"No, I want to rest tonight, I need a little time to organize my thoughts." Then she shifted, eyes widening a bit as she realized how it all sounded. "It's nothing bad! Or, I don't think so, not anymore at least. It's just big and important and I just—"
"Rumi, babe, breathe." Mira calling her that made her stop short, feeling a pleased shiver race down her spine. "It's okay, we get it, we can wait until tomorrow. I just wanted to be sure you didn't think we were too tired to listen."
Something unclenched in Rumi's chest. Pressed between them, wrapped up in the way they wanted to support her through anything, she felt like maybe it would all turn out alright.
By the time they made it home and Rumi retreated to her shower, she thought she might truly be losing it.
The energy still buzzed in her limbs but she was so tired, so sluggish now, she had no idea what to do with it. It was like a part of her was pulling one direction while the rest of her had no idea which way was up.
The hot water helped, soothing all of the tension from her muscles as steam filled the room around her. Her showers always had to be one extreme or the other depending on how much she'd had to suppress that day. Whenever she was struggling, freezing showers helped to center her mind and kept her on track. Boiling hot like this, however, tended to make her relax, so much that it was dangerous.
Her patterns flashed, the different colors new to her. They'd stopped spreading after she found that journal, after that trip to Celine's home, though she could feel them wanting to expand. Her guardian hadn't been there but Rumi had hoped to catch her before the tour started. Normally, they only saw her for business and no matter what she'd do, Rumi just wanted Celine's approval, her love, so she'd hoped to catch her just once before the tour.
Some small part of her held onto the hope that Celine might smile at her, might rumble and say how proud she was, how close they were to making the Honmoon gold. She knew realistically it wouldn't happen, she'd realized years ago when Celine stopped interacting beyond training and idol business, now seeing the girls as Rumi's pack and not herself, that her guardian would never truly see her. Celine could never accept giant pieces of Rumi, always forcing her to change and shift to be who she wanted her to be instead.
Still, she'd tried, and that day in her search for something of Celine's to take with her that she wouldn't miss, for some semblance of comfort from home, Rumi had found a little box tucked away. She'd nearly ignored it, not wanting to breach her guardian's privacy, but then she'd noticed her name on the box.
It was dusty, as if it were normally hidden and just happened to be visible enough to her this time by chance. The writing on it wasn't something she recognized, not Celine's neat cold script and not her own looping signature.
With a shaking hand, she'd taken the box before she could question it and had run home.
There she found a journal, pictures she'd never seen before, and pressed flowers that were the same color as her hair. She'd choked on a sob when she recognized her mother in the pictures, thankful that she'd been home alone for once so the sound didn't worry her alphas. In those pictures, she saw her mother so happy, very pregnant with her, and standing with someone she figured must be her other parent. Celine had never mentioned a gender or presentation, always just hissing That Demon anytime Rumi asked.
There were only four photos but they were enough for Rumi to see the love there, even if they had to keep it hidden.
The flowers had little papers wrapped around them, to keep them safe, and on one of them she could see For Rumi written in that same script. It had ached, to see the delicate love they'd held for her, the precious gifts that they tried to leave.
Then the journal broke her entire world open.
Her mother left pages and pages about her heritage, truths about hunters she'd discovered on her own through a deeper connection to the Honmoon. That was something she'd passed onto Rumi, something Rumi had felt long ago, before the suppressants and the hiding.
The connection had been steadily growing stronger the more she stopped doing that.
She'd written about the things they'd be taught that were wrong, information about demons that Rumi had never heard, and what she'd learned about the golden Honmoon. It had left Rumi's head spinning but by the time she finished reading the journal, after she'd looked at what her mother had found from the evidence she'd pressed between the pages, something like grief had blossomed in her chest only to quickly turn to rage.
Celine had to have known. Maybe she didn't read the journal, maybe she hadn't listened to her mother if she'd tried to explain, maybe she really didn't know anything, but Celine knew about the box. She knew these were things Rumi was supposed to know from the start.
Yet it had all been kept hidden. Rumi had been taught lessons that hurt her, that were turning the Honmoon into something that wouldn't ever truly function, and she had wanted to rip something apart at the knowledge.
Instead, she'd started to distance herself from Celine, needing to detach and take time to work through her feelings. That was also when she started to lower her doses of suppressants, to start to wean off of them.
Her mother never wanted her to hide, had wished for her to be proud and happy and full of all the good in the world, and Rumi never wanted to present as anything other than herself to please the guardian who tried to take all of that from her. Deep down, she knew Celine loved her in her own way but Rumi didn't know if that could be enough anymore.
They'd have to talk eventually but she wanted to be open with her girls first, needed to get all of her truths out, needed to just be Rumi with them, because she didn't think she could face Celine alone.
With a deep breath, Rumi shook herself free of her thoughts. The tension had left her but the energy still sat there, like something waiting in the back of her mind. While the shower had helped, she didn't think anything else really would, and the exhaustion that was starting to sink in even more was pushing her towards her bed.
She went through her routine as quickly as she could, cursing the length of her hair as she worked on drying it as best she could so it wouldn't soak her pillows. Normally, she'd wash it and take her time in drying and caring for it, but that night, every action felt like it took extreme effort.
The mirror was fogged and when she swiped her hand across it, Rumi was surprised to see her ears had sharpened. It was one of the physical changes she'd show if she didn't force all of her demonic heritage down, one that Celine had forcefully monitored by insisting on her braiding her hair at all times.
Now they were pointed, a little longer than before and they twitched up and down slightly alongside the emotions that rushed through her at the sight of them.
The glow caught her eyes next. Her patterns were moving, crawling in a way they hadn't done since she'd started to work on her feelings of shame. They curled further, shifting and flickering until they started to cover all of her. It was startling, knowing they'd be visible before Rumi could even talk to her girls, but a part of her felt a little excited at the change.
Another part of her wanted to scream.
It was such a confusing conflict of emotion. The part of her that had been accepting herself, that had been feeling so free and open even while she was still hiding these past few months, was exhilarated. This was a part of her, a big part that she was getting used to accepting and even loving after reading her mother's journal. The other part, the one raised by Celine, that had her claws sunk into her mind for much longer, wanted to recoil, to cry and break the mirror so she wouldn't have to see what she'd become.
Her patterns flashed through multiple colors. The iridescent shade they'd been at recently slipping into the dark purple she'd been used to for so many years, and then fluttering back. Pink and orange, blue and green, all of them flashed, showing the maelstrom of her mind.
"Please, please, nothing else yet." Rumi gripped the edge of the sink, body bending as a deep ache thrummed from different spots. "Please, I'm working on it, I'm trying, but I need to talk to them first. I need to explain before they can see."
The Honmoon hummed around her, shifting and pressing close. It understood, it heard her, it felt for her, and she could understand the way it warmed against her. Something changed, the vibrations beneath skin easing and the ache soothed until it felt less present, more like a fading bruise. Whatever the Honmoon had done, it stalled the way her demonic blood pulsed, it soothed whatever was happening to her for at least a short time.
It wouldn't be too long, she could tell. Her limbs felt heavy, mind fuzzy, but she did feel a little better, less like any and all attributes she'd been hiding for years would suddenly be very apparent.
"Thank you." The strands of the Honmoon flickered around her, slipping through her fingers in a way that felt almost affectionate. It hummed around her again, colors rippling through the room. "I'll tell them tomorrow, I promise, I just need to rest first. If I try to tell them now, I don't think I'll get everything out."
The color stopped, freezing for just a breath before they picked up the pace, this time tinged in soft pink. It felt like the Honmoon was celebrating, like it knew more than she had said, and Rumi just laughed, tears prickling at the corners of her eyes.
Was this the deeper connection she'd been locked out from? Was this the true way the Honmoon could reach her? Had it always loved them so much, had it always been able to communicate and feel and hope that they'd love as well?
As the rippling calmed, the Honmoon rose around her, feeling almost like it was nuzzling against her. It felt like encouragement, it felt like a friend conspiring with her to be sure she really did what she'd promised. Rumi leaned her cheek down, pressing into the fluttering pinks and blues that slipped across her shoulder. A purr thundered from her chest before she could stop it, the moment feeling warm and soft and almost like her mother were there, almost like it were her there holding her while being so excited for her.
"Do you think she'd be proud of me?" It felt like a silly thing to ask the Honmoon but she couldn't stop herself. "I mean, I'm going to tell them everything. That I'm half demon, that I'm an omega, and that... that our connection is a soulmate bond, not just a hunter bond. I think, I hope, they'll love me too but I'm.. a little scared, I guess."
If a barrier made of soul fragments and colorful light could look at her in a deadpan disbelief, Rumi believed this is exactly what it would be like. Laughter slipped out before she could contain it, filling the room almost as much as the colors around them did.
"Okay, okay, my mates will love me, probably always have. It's just hard to believe, I suppose, after so many years of repressing... everything." Rumi hated that it felt so easy to speak to the Honmoon and yet felt so impossible to do with anyone else. Even with her conviction about spilling the truth soon, the anxiety and nerves and fears that plagued Rumi were all trying to get her to keep hiding, to just bury everything back down. "It feels more like something I can do now since I've had time to adjust to the idea, but it's like I can still see every way it can go bad. Kind of hard to be excited about telling my mates that we're soulmates when I can only think about them abandoning me for lying and being a demon."
A low, almost mournful sound echoed in her ears at that. The Honmoon trembled purple for a moment and then resettled, doing that little nuzzling motion against her once more. It ached for her, it wept for the years the connection had been so weak, and Rumi understood that it never would have let her believe any of the horrible things she'd been taught if they had been able to communicate earlier.
Something in her cracked and rebuilt at the realization, some of the steel that never left her spine melting under the prospect of having always been loved, always been seen, just not by who she'd hoped.
Suddenly her ears, her patterns, all of the other changes, felt something like a blessing as the Honmoon wrapped warmly around her. The protector of the world loved her, adored her as she was. Pressed this close, she could feel the excitement thrumming through it at her new acceptance, could feel the way it looked forward to seeing her blossom, to seeing what all would change now that Rumi didn't feel like she had to hide.
"Did you help dry my hair?" Rumi chuckled as she realized no water was dripping from her still, though her hair was still damp. Another ripple, so similar to her own purr, was the only answer. Then the Honmoon stilled, calmed, having helped as much as it could for the evening.
With it retreating, Rumi was reminded of the exhaustion in her limbs.
Slowly, she made her way back to her bed, frowning at how wrong it felt the moment she laid down. When squirming and shifting didn't help, Rumi tugged and resituated her blankets and pillows until she was surrounded, curling up into a ball in the middle of the mess. It still wasn't perfect but it was enough to let her fall asleep.
"Do you think Rumi's okay?" Mira tilted her head at Zoey's question, looking down at the other alpha where she lay across her lap. "She's never warned us about wanting to talk about personal stuff before."
That was true. Rumi either kept everything close to the chest or blurted out what she needed to say after it built up inside her for too long. It was nice to hear that she wanted to open up, but Mira had to admit she was also a little nervous about what it could be about.
Truthfully, Mira had noticed some changes in their leader over the past few months. Ever since the start of the tour, she'd been more vibrant, laughing more openly, and to her delight, more physically affectionate. They'd all always been very touchy, but Rumi was always the first to pull away, the first to get shy or skittish.
Lately, though, she'd been cuddling up whenever they sat close together and she'd always hold any hand that ended up in her range.
"I don't think it'll be anything bad. I mean, she said it herself and she's been.. happier lately." Mira smiled when Zoey hummed, obviously pleased with that fact too. "Did you notice her taking less of that stuff Celine always keeps her on? And she didn't reach out to Celine at all during the tour. It probably has something to do with that."
"Oh, yeah, maybe." So Zoey didn't notice. Mira rumbled softly, running a soothing hand through her hair. Zoey whined, turning her head to hide it against Mira's stomach. "I should have noticed, I always hate it when she gets so sad after Celine's calls."
"You were enjoying the happy Rumi time, it's fine to not have realized about Celine. I think we both spend as little time as possible thinking about our delightful mentor now anyway." Mira had to hold in a growl at the thought of her. Celine had been so important to her for a short time. She'd been the one to take her away from her family, had introduced her to Zoey and Rumi, had trained her. Now though, after really seeing how Celine treated Rumi so coldly and how she'd unceremoniously kicked them out to move to the penthouse without any warning, it just rubbed Mira the wrong way.
Then it had only gotten worse when just days after kicking them out, Celine had called and she'd never get the sound of Rumi crying at being removed from Celine's pack out of her head. They may have been a pack now, may have become hers the moment they met, but Celine was always meant to remain her familial pack. Hell, even her shitty family that she only spoke to when absolutely necessary hadn't removed her from their pack. Yet Celine had cut ties with Rumi.
It had taken weeks for Rumi to stop randomly crying or rubbing a spot over her heart, like it had been physically painful to have Celine removed.
Zoey still held respect for her since she'd been their mentor and while Rumi hurt, Mira knew she still loved Celine. She'd never stop them from interacting, would never try to restrict either of them from spending time with Celine, but every time Rumi cried after a short clipped call or Zoey deflated when Celine refused to speak about anything other than their goal of the golden Honmoon, well, it just made it much easier for Mira to count her as another failed parental figure.
A part of her could understand. Celine had lost her pack, the other two hunters of her generation dead and any other family members she'd had were long gone as well. Her being cold or short with them, being closed off, made a certain amount of sense. She was an alpha without a pack and while she always believed Rumi would remain as her only familial pack, it would never be the same as her chosen pack. Mira had noticed the way Celine would nearly overflow with grief as she watched Rumi train at times, always sure to change her expression when Rumi would look her way for some feedback.
Just because Mira could understand her to a point didn't mean she had to like her.
"Her scents been changing." Zoey grabbed her attention back, resituating to look up at her. "Nothing major, really, but it's been fuller, less sterile. She'd always smelled a little like a hospital because of the stuff Celine gave her but now, she smells like flowers."
"Yeah." The medicine Celine had watched Rumi take like a hawk had been explained as necessary for Rumi's health, that she had a pheromone disorder that could become problematic if she didn't take suppressant medication. Mira hadn't ever questioned it past that as Rumi had looked incredibly uncomfortable as it was discussed and the one time she'd mentioned her lack of scent, she'd looked close to tears. So they'd helped her figure out perfumes she liked so they could all scent each other with Rumi giving off more than what she had. "I think she's been lowering the dose for a while now. Maybe Celine was wrong about her diagnosis or something?"
"Maybe." With a drawn out groan, Zoey rubbed her hands over her face. "I thought speculating would help me figure out a possibility but it's just making me more impatient!"
Mira chuckled, the ire that had been building at the thought of Celine dying down at the sight of Zoey kicking her feet against the couch in frustration.
"Come on, we can go watch something in my bed instead. That way if we fall asleep we won't wake up feeling like death."
"Will you brush my hair for me?"
"Duh."
There was a sliver of early morning light streaming in through the cracks of Rumi's curtains when she woke next. Her entire body was trembling, shivering from a cold she couldn't understand. There were pillows and blankets and plushies surrounding her, at some point in the night she'd wiggled into a hoodie and two more blankets were covering her entirely.
Yet she trembled, sweaty even as she felt like ice was wrapped around her. Did she have a fever? What was—
Rumi shot upright, eyes wide as she looked back at the tail that thrashed in agitation behind her. That was new. Her ears twitched when it thumped against the mattress and then she realized they'd moved, now perched more atop her head. Reaching a hand up, she felt them, soft and furred and very much the shape of a tiger's ears. The tail was purple like her hair, the patterns swirling along it iridescent and shining, with a soft heart shaped arrow tip at the end.
Oh. She knew what this was. Celine had badgered her about never letting these parts of herself show so often, she'd honestly believed they'd never show up, even off the suppressants.
Demon's had more physical differences in traits and since she was half human, hers would only show when she called them or in times of intense emotion or—
"Fuck." She was going into heat. The fact that her human ears had sharpened meant those were the default, not the cat ears, which meant these were hallmarks of her heat. Her tail flicked lazily, as if pleased she'd realized, and then, with her mind more awake, the instincts smacked her in the face.
Rumi was freezing because her nest was incomplete, it was wrong, and her mates were missing. A whine slipped through clenched teeth as she slid from the bed, tail curling around her leg as if it could provide some sort of self soothing.
The open space of the apartment was silent, empty, but Rumi spotted some blankets on the couch. One of Mira's hoodies lay across the back of it and she knew the green pillow would smell like Zoey.
Quietly, she rushed forward to grab it all and then fled back to her room.
With the scent of her pack, her mates, finally in her space with her, some of the cold seeped out of Rumi's bones.
She rolled the blankets, making a contained area on her bed as she tucked the ones smelling of her mates with the blankets she already had. Her pillows were tucked in next, the one from Zoey set next to her own. Rumi changed out of her own hoodie to wear Mira's instead, pulling the hood up and tucking her nose into the material to breathe her in.
It still wasn't right. Too big for being alone but any smaller felt worse. Though the new things helped, it didn't feel like enough and her nest didn't feel fully safe, it didn't feel built right. There were open spots, places where it dented down instead of sitting correctly around her. Her pack scents were there but not enough, not saturating the space enough, and her eyes burned as she shivered, curling into a ball.
Even with another blanket around her and the hoodie, she was still so cold, and now she felt a strange little shame bubble up in her gut.
For years she'd been forced to act like a beta but even then, she wasn't allowed to nest. Beta's would occasionally build nests, they were slightly different to omega nests but they still made them, in open spaces for pack bonding. Celine never let her learn how to make them, never let her listen to her instincts, never let her figure out what being an omega meant.
When her first heat hit, Celine put her on the suppressants before it had even truly started and she'd just been on them ever since. She knew that it was a natural cycle, that it only became about mating if one actually had mates connected through mating bites, but her body didn't understand entirely what her instincts were calling out for. It was like being on the suppressants so long, and Celine forcing her to act like a beta even when she was a small child, nothing felt like it was clicking correctly in her mind.
She wanted her mates, but couldn't get them yet as they needed to talk. Her nest needed to be fixed, but she had to wait before she could get more for it. The rumbling in her stomach told her she was starving, her body starting to burn calories even faster than normal, but all of her muscles felt locked in place.
With a low whine, Rumi just curled up miserably beneath the blanket, keeping her face pressed into Zoey's pillow. Maybe if she just drowned her senses in the scent of her mates, everything else would stop.
The Honmoon had never called to them before, not like this. Normally if a demon ripped through or one that had been hiding attacked someone, purple or red ripples would splay around then, a warning system that led them to the problem.
This time, though, Mira woke up to the Honmoon fluttering around the room, shifting between its calm blues and a pink hue she'd never really seen before. It didn't scream to her of a demon, of a breach, but instead, it felt like a whisper for help, like the gentle nudge to get up to do what it asked.
"Zoey, wake up." They'd fallen asleep not long after they'd gotten comfortable but a glance at her phone told her it was already early morning. "Something's wrong."
"Hm?" Zoey's eyes fluttered softly for a moment before she shot up, now looking wildly around the room. "Whoa."
"I don't know what it means but it's not the usual warning." Mira slipped out of bed, her fingers tracing over the lines of the Honmoon. It seemed to calm now that they were awake, tugging at her to bring her to the door to her room.
She tried to focus, as if she could hear what it wanted from her. Was there a tear but no demons? Was it something happening in the penthouse? Was it—
"Is it Rumi?" The question sparked a sudden flash of panic in Mira as Zoey scrambled to get up as well. "She's not in here with us, is it trying to lead us to her?"
That was all the idea Mira needed to charge out of her room, forgoing any of the hesitance she'd had. The moment she stepped out, Mira was hit with Rumi's scent. Lily of the valley and jasmine, fresh rain on roses, the floral swirl was much more potent, containing more depth to it than Mira had ever smelled before. She stumbled, having to breathe through her mouth to try to focus as Zoey gasped when she stepped out beside her.
"It smells like... Why does it smell like Rumi's in heat?"
"I-I don't know." Mira blinked, trying to figure out what could be happening when it hit her. "The thing she said she needed to talk about. She's been taking less of the stuff Celine told her to... Zoey, what if she's been... suppressing everything?"
"Mira, we've known her for eight years, that's.. really not healthy." Yes, there were ways to transition presentations but those needed to be monitored by doctors and, usually, only took three or four years for even the most difficult transitions to have the body shift to producing the hormones and pheromones of the wanted presentation. For Rumi to have smelled and acted like a beta for years but now to smell like an omega? It pointed to a dangerous regimen of suppressants that should only be taken if one wants to obfuscate their scent in public. Those weren't meant to be taken in such a constant, consistent way.
"Yeah, which makes sense for why it smells like heat so suddenly. It should be a build up but this." Pre-heat usually meant a week of shifting pheromones, scent intensifying until the four days of heat actually hit. For Rumi to have skipped pre-heat entirely? That wasn't good.
"Okay! Well we have to help her!" Zoey clapped her hands and then got to work. "I'll grab some water bottles and food! She's going to be hungry. You go grab some blankets and pillows from our beds, maybe some hoodies too? I'm sure Rumi needs to make a nest."
"Right, yeah." With something to do, Mira felt more centered, felt like she could think. Rumi was an omega, okay, fine. It stung a bit that it had been kept secret but with how Celine was with Rumi, it wasn't entirely a surprise. Plus, it really did seem like something she meant to confess herself that day anyway.
She wrapped pillows and hoodies up into two blankets and then slung the whole package over her shoulder. With their scents around her, it made it a little easier to push through Rumi's heat scent. The fact that she could feel warmth in her gut, the stirring of a protective possessive beast within her, was a little alarming.
Heat shouldn't spark that in her, they hadn't mated, they didn't exchange bites. Rumi's heat should just mean they'll need to be present even more than usual, they'd need to touch and cuddle and take care of her while she stayed in her nest for a few days. Yet, Mira felt her teeth grind as she breathed in her scent, itching to bite and mark and—
Fuck.
"You ready?" Zoey's face was flush, sweat gathering on her brow like she'd been fighting with something, and Mira wondered if she felt the same way.
With a nod, she led the way to Rumi's door, knocking quietly to try to not startle her. Muffled whines and sobs carried through it leaving Mira tense, the need to break the damn thing down to curl protectively around Rumi making her clench her jaw.
"Rumi?" There was a tremble in Zoey's voice and they caught the gasp from inside the room when Rumi heard her. "Honey, we want to help you, can we come in?"
"I gotta... talk to you first." Little whimpers came between the words, each one ripping Mira's heart to pieces. "I-I have to explain."
"Rumi, baby, we can smell you're in heat." Mira didn't bother hiding it. There was a panicked little groan but before Rumi could scramble to talk, Mira tried to soothe her. "It's okay, we're not mad, we just want to help."
The silence that followed was painful. Zoey kept shifting anxiously on her feet as she balanced what looked like half their snack drawer in her arms. There wasn't much Mira could do either, flexing her hand around the blanket clutched in it while the other held frozen over Rumi's doorknob.
"I, uhm, there's something else too. Two things." Rumi sounded so small, almost like she was afraid of their reactions. It made her ache, to know any part of Rumi got nervous to speak to them or was fearful of them. They were meant to protect her, to keep her safe. "If you come in, can you stay by the door until I finish talking?"
"Whatever you want."
"Whatever you need."
They'd spoken at the same time, almost rushing to reassure her. It seemed to work as a slightly strained laugh broke through, even if it hiccupped into another tiny sob a moment later. Rumi's tiny okay was all Mira needed to finally open the door.
Her scent was even worse inside. Cloying and heady. The room was warm but she could see Rumi shivering under her covers. She'd hidden herself under blankets, her face only barely visible over the edge of her nest. The whole bed was a mess and while it was definitely a nest, Mira felt something in her ache as she realized it was very obviously the first one Rumi had ever built.
They'd tried before to get her to nest, to build communal ones on the couch, but she'd always shyed away, though she'd never turned down curling up with them. Mira had just figured she didn't care for them, or that she hadn't been raised with communal ones as they'd never had nests while training with Celine.
Now all of that just felt like a punch to the gut.
"We brought you things." Zoey spoke softly, quietly, as if worried she'd spook Rumi. "Is it okay if we set things down by the bed and then back up again?" Rumi's hazy eyes filled with more tears at the question and Zoey sputtered. "It's okay if not! We can wait until you talk! I just want you to be comfortable, Rumi."
"Are you not gonna stay?" Mira frowned at the question, at the despondent little whine in Rumi's voice, before it clicked.
"We aren't leaving, Rumi, I promise. Zoey just meant so you could reach it if you need anything before you tell us what you need to."
"Oh! Rumi! I didn't mean we'd drop off and go!" Zoey shifted on her feet again, obviously itching to run over so she could hug Rumi. "We'll stay as long as you want us to."
Her eyes flickered between them as she relaxed. The Honmoon rippled again, pink and blue as it gently moved to wrap around Rumi. Mira had never seen it do that before but Rumi seemed to take extreme comfort in it, her eyes fluttering closed as a light purr filled the room. It reminded her of the sound she'd made in the car the night before.
While Mira had noticed it was different, she hadn't really thought much of it, didn't think it would be for this kind of reason, especially not when it had deepened into what she'd always sounded like not long after.
Now, though, Rumi sounded and smelled like pure omega.
"I just need to say it." There was a tremor in Rumi's voice but she looked determined after the Honmoon's touch. "Since you might leave after anyway."
"Rumi—"
"No, it's just.. please, just listen and then decide, okay?"
Mira met Zoey's eyes and then, at the same time, they sat on the floor. They didn't want to overwhelm Rumi by getting closer to give her things but they also didn't want her to really think they'd leave, so they chose the next best option.
Sit on the floor with the things they brought on their laps so there wouldn't be any running.
Rumi blinked at them and Mira could see the moment it registered in her mind just what they'd done. Her eyes warmed and she sat up, still keeping herself entirely hidden but she looked a little steadier, a little less terrified.
"I need to say all of this really fast and all at once so I don't stop myself from saying it, okay?" Mira nodded slowly, catching Zoey doing the same with much more enthusiasm out of the corner of her eye."Okay. So to start, you obviously know now I'm an omega. Celine put me on suppressants and blockers after my first heat. I never questioned her, or tried to go against her, I just... I wanted to believe she was doing what was best for me, what was right and safest and she'd spent my whole life treating me like I was a beta anyway, so..."
Rumi shrugged, like it was fine, like she hadn't just said something that made Mira want to throttle Celine. Since her first heat? None of Rumi's pheromones or instincts would have regulated, it was no wonder this hit her without any warning.
"I found out some things a while ago, stuff I'll let you.." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "It's a journal my mother left me. I'll let you guys read it later, to help explain some stuff. Anyway, since I found it, I've been working on accepting myself and I started weaning off the suppressants. I stopped them entirely about a week ago and I thought they'd be out of my system when the break started, but I didn't expect it to be at the exact start."
Rumi let out a little nervous laugh and Mira noticed the blanket shifting strangely around her head. It was wrapped tight, and she could see the hood of a sweatshirt pulled up around her face, but it shifted like something beneath it all moved.
"I don't really know how to say the rest of this so I'm just going to say it all at once." There was a pause as Rumi took in a deep breath, closing her eyes like she couldn't bear to see how they'd react. The thought of it made Mira's heart hurt. "My mom was a hunter, you know that, but my dad, he was, well, he was a demon. I'm half demon, born that way. Celine made me hide it, she kept saying the golden Honmoon would fix me, like the patterns were a disease, but I know better now. My mom left me information, notes, in the journal, and it wouldn't have fixed me, it would have killed me, or at the very least, banished me to the demon realm."
Mira froze at that. At first rage bubbled up. Rumi had hidden, she'd lied, she was a demon, that felt more impactful than her hiding being an omega. Yet, it fizzled when she heard the rest. The goal they'd been aiming for, the one Rumi had been fighting to achieve, had been poison from the start.
Zoey was crying next to her, trembling with her eyes focused on Rumi, like she thought if she looked away, Rumi would disappear. Like she'd really be dead.
"I thought.. I really believed I had to keep it a secret. Celine had me convinced you'd hate me, that she taught you too well to accept I was a demon, and that if you found out, you'd leave." Rumi hiccupped then, nearly choking on a sob just at the idea of it. "I wouldn't be able to- I can't live without you two. If you leave, you'd take my heart with you. The Honmoon tied us together as Hunters but we're more than that." She swallowed hard, watching as Rumi centered herself. Mira could see the lingering fear, like Rumi thought this might be what pushed them over some kind of imagined ledge. "We're soulmates, true mates, whatever term you want to use. You haven't felt it or scented it because of all the suppressants, but I knew from the start. I thought we couldn't be together until I was fixed, until I wasn't some kind of mistake so you could love me for me, but I'm... I can't change who I am, what I am, and so I just need you to know. If you want to stay, if you want me still, then I'm yours, your mate, your omega, everything."
With that last word, all energy seemed to be zapped away from Rumi, She collapsed back onto the bed, curling into the blankets still wrapped around her. The trembling was worse now, Rumi shivering like she already expected rejection, like she anticipated it all going horribly.
If anything, that just made all of Mira's anger about the secrets and lies turn to be directed entirely at Celine.
She'd wanted to be mates with Rumi for so long, Zoey too. They'd talked about it so many times, had wondered how to breach the subject of it, and had figured that they'd wait just a little longer to see if Rumi would respond to their advances during the break.
Now she knew they could have been mates already.
Then, Rumi being half demon didn't really bother her. Rumi was Rumi, and yes they were hunters but they never sought out demons, they only killed those that sparked the Honmoon, that were actively hurting people. Why would they ever hurt Rumi? Why would they ever hate Rumi? She was so good, so wonderful and kind. She was everything.
Mira looked over at Zoey, nudging her when the girl still hadn't looked away from Rumi. She blinked before looking at Mira with the most devastated gaze she'd ever seen.
"Rumi?" Zoey sniffled, waiting until the omega looked over. Her eyes were red rimmed and hazy, but Mira thought she looked cautiously hopeful since they hadn't fled immediately. "Can we come to your nest now?"
"You still want to?" Rumi's voice was so small now, so nervous, Mira's heart felt like it was tearing apart in her chest.
"Of course we do, princess." The pet name slipped out before she could stop it but Mira was glad she used it when Rumi flushed pink, pressing her face into a pillow to hide a smile. "Rumi, can you listen to us now?"
There was a pause but then Rumi nodded, scooting a little closer to the edge of her nest to give them her undivided attention. She still looked fearful, like she was waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it felt like the hope, the optimistic want, was starting to win out.
"I don't care that you're half demon, Rumi. Or, well, more accurately, I do care, but only because it's a part of you and I love you." Rumi blinked at her with those wide, wet hopeful eyes and Mira felt something inside of her melt. "I'm upset about the secrets and lies, they went on for so long, but I can't really blame you when you'd been taught all your life that those parts of you were wrong."
"You're not a mistake, Rumi." Zoey crawled closer, somehow dragging all the food with her in a smooth motion. She stopped at the side of the bed, pressing her cheek to the mattress to look up directly at Rumi. "You're Rumi, our Rumi, and we love you, so much. I love you so much I feel like I'm always gonna explode with it, just like I'm always overflowing with love for Mira, too." She turned to grin at Mira, provoking an eyeroll.
Still, Mira got up to go to the bed as well, though she sat on the edge of the mattress instead of the floor still. Rumi froze at them being so close but when Mira handed over the bundle she had of scent coated items, Rumi took it with a deep purr.
She waited for her to look at her again before she held out a hand, humming happily when Rumi wiggled free enough to lace their fingers together.
"I want to learn more. Your heritage, the Honmoon, what things Celine taught us are true and what things are false. I want to know everything. No more lies, no more secrets, not when it comes to important things, okay?"
"It's a good promise!" Zoey pulled herself up onto the bed too, taking Rumi's other hand when it was offered. "We already tell each other most things but some more open honesty isn't a bad thing. Especially since we're mates." She said it so easily that Rumi's head whipped to look at her, tears slipping silently down her cheeks.
The realization that Rumi hadn't realized they'd meant they loved her in that way, that they wanted that, left a dull ache throughout Mira's entire body.
"Rumi, listen to me." Mira wanted to melt into a puddle when Rumi looked at her, head slightly tilted to bare her neck in a pose so submissive that protective instinct inside of her roared to life. "We love you, we want to be mates, we want to be everything with you. Human or demon or both. Beta or omega, or even if you want to be an alpha. Nothing would ever stop the way we want you."
"She's right." The rumble that came from Zoey's chest was soothing, gentle, and Rum's eyes fluttered closed at the sound. "I'm sad you hid from us for so long and I'm upset that you had to go through everything alone up till now, but you never have to be alone again. We're pack, Rumi, we're soulmates, and I don't ever want to know what life is like without you two in it."
Mira watched as their words settled over Rumi like a blanket, how even through the fever of her heat, Rumi looked more clearheaded and free than she ever had before. Pride swelled in her chest at the peaceful expression on her face as she sat back up and squirmed enough to make space in the nest on either side of her.
"Will you, uhm, come in here with me, please?"
The question didn't get a verbal answer as Zoey hauled herself up. She set the food and water onto Rumi's side table before she carefully crawled into the nest. Mira had moved to Rumi's left, helping her to unwrap the bundle of things she'd brought in, so Zoey settled at her right, still rumbling softly as it seemed to relax her.
So much information had been thrown their way, in quick succession, and she knew they'd need to talk it through more thoroughly, but Zoey didn't care about any of that.
Rumi was her mate, Mira was her mate, and Zoey didn't think she'd ever feel happier. Well, okay, she'd feel even happier when they exchanged bites but she didn't know when Rumi would be comfortable doing so.
For now, she just wanted to take care of her heat stricken omega and be comfy cozy with both her mates. Her girlfriends?
"We're girlfriends now, right?" The question came blurting out from her mouth the moment the question entered her mind. Rumi looked at her with a shocked expression, blinking rapidly, while Mira just chuckled as she nodded.
"Girlfriends, mates, same thing." Mira shrugged, looking pleased with herself when Rumi flushed shyly, hiding even more in the things wrapped around her. That was when Zoey realized she still could barely see Rumi, even parts of her face hidden in the hood and blanket combination.
"Okay, two more questions. Rumi, you want that, right?" She grinned when the omega looked at her like she was crazy to ask. Still, she waited, needing the verbal confirmation from both girls. Rumi seemed to realize this so she nodded, a tiny soft smile on her face.
"Yes, I do."
"Good! Mates! Girlfriends!" Zoey grinned, giggling when Rumi's purring got louder and Mira answered it with a rumble of her own on instinct. "Then, Rumi, honey, can we unwrap you a bit? You're not shivering as bad and I'd like to see you better, if that's okay."
"Oh, uhm." Rumi hesitated, that nervous look returning as she fidgeted. "I look a little... different. Is that okay?"
"Of course." Zoey picked Rumi's hand up, bringing it to her lips to kiss across her knuckles. "We love you, Rumi, no matter what."
"What's different?" Mira's question came after she kissed Rumi's other hand, effectively leaving their omega a blushing mess. It was cute, how quickly she got so flustered.
"I just, I'll show you. Demons have more physical changes with their presentation so sometimes I have... well..." Rumi hesitated a moment and then tugged the blanket back, shaking her head when the hood fell.
Ears. Kitty ears. Rumi had little tiger ears instead of her usual human ones. They twitched in a way that displaced the hair around them and when Rumi wiggled more out of the blankets, a tail squirmed free, whipping in an almost agitated circle before it settled between them.
Zoey was so distracted she almost missed her patterns. They covered her entirely, in a way Zoey had no idea how they'd missed them before. They seemed to be moving, covering even more before her eyes, and they shimmered, iridescent and beautiful. The colors in them shifted between pink and blue, reminding her of how the Honmoon had looked that morning when it woke them up.
When she followed them back up Rumi's arms to her face, she noticed them crawling up her neck and across her face now. It took a moment before they finally settled, no longer curling and changing, but instead just glowing softly in the dim light of Rumi's room.
"You're so fucking cute!" Zoey didn't swear often so when the word escaped her so eagerly, Rumi looked startled, her tail curling. She didn't know what to do with herself, hands hovering over Rumi's arm. "Can I touch? Do they hurt?"
"No, they don't hurt. Not anymore."
"They used to?"
"When I was hiding them, it was like I was always suppressing a part of myself. They used to just be on my arms but they kept slowly spreading. Since I was trying to stop it, they ached when they moved." Zoey ached hearing that. She gently trailed her fingertips across one of the lines on Rumi's forearm. The colors shimmered under her touch, the soft glow growing a little brighter. "All those headaches I used to get were a part of it too. When my ears are normal, they like to be pointed and these ears want to come out sometimes, with big emotions and stuff, so whenever I got a headache..."
"You were forcing your ears to stay how they were before?" Oh, Zoey hurt even more at that when Rumi nodded. Mira seemed to agree with her, a deep stuttered growl coming from her. She was obviously trying to keep it under control but with every little detail that came out, Zoey could see Mira's rage towards Celine growing.
Rumi seemed to sense it as her tail shifted, wrapping around Mira's waist. Her growls immediately melted back into rumbles, looking absolutely pleased to be anchored to Rumi. For her part, their omega looked shocked that she'd even done that, though Mira's reaction made her patterns flutter a pretty pink.
"Okay, Rumi, I have one more very important question." Rumi's ears perked forward, flicking towards Zoey before her eyes followed and her head tilted curiously. She was so cute, so adorable, Zoey may actually explode. "Have you eaten yet?"
The answer came from the growl her stomach made at the reminder of food. Mira raised a brow at that while Zoey just grabbed what she'd brought from the table.
"Hydration time first! You look like you were sweating and crying and you always need water during a heat." Zoey opened one of the big bottles and then handed it over, watching as Rumi downed half of it in one go. When she handed it back, Zoey leaned up to kiss her cheek, right on one of her patterns. Rumi froze and then leaned closer to her, asking for more. "Eat first, Rumi. I brought some honey butter chips and shrimp chips, and those little jerky snacks you like. Some other things too."
"I'll make actual food a little later." Mira huffed at the selection, though she seemed pleased when Rumi started eating the chips Zoey handed to her. "For now, I think we should just get comfortable and rest."
Zoey was going to ask about resting when they'd just woken up when she noticed the way Rumi wobbled. The omega looked wrecked, like she hadn't slept well and then all of the emotions of the morning hit her all at once.
Everything suddenly felt so warm.
The cold that had been sticking to her all morning had evaporated the moment they crawled into bed with her. Rumi's tail felt right when it curled around Mira, she felt good as Zoey slowly kept feeding her little snacks.
The room finally smelled of them all, of pack and home and mates.
"Rumi? Can I help you get the rest of these things situated into your nest?" Mira's question was gentle, quiet, like she didn't want to do anything to upset her. Rumi didn't understand why it would have been a problem but being asked, the way she checked in, made her feel even warmer.
"Yes, please." The answer made Mira brighten like Rumi had just handed her the stars.
They moved slowly. Mira helped her solidify the walls with the blankets, showing her how to tuck and weave the articles of clothing in to keep it sturdy and smelling of them. Then they organized the pillows and plushies, making everything surround the three of them in a cozy safe zone.
Through it all, Zoey kept feeding her little bits until she'd finished off a bag of chips, three jerky snacks, and two choco pies. She made sure Rumi finished the water bottle she'd started drinking, as well, before she nodded approvingly at the nest.
Something about them helping her, about their pride and approval and love, left Rumi feeling boneless as she slumped down between them with an off kilter purr.
"Whoa, you okay, Rumi?" Zoey hovered over her, worry creasing her brow.
"Tired." She barely mumbled the word, tugging on them both. They moved together, holding Rumi like she were something precious as they lay down beside her, making sure she was tucked under the blankets.
Rumi kept her tail wrapped around Mira, pleased when the alpha pressed right up against her back and slipped her arms around her. She kept things angled so she didn't push against the base of her tail, tangling their legs together to keep her steady. Zoey slipped into her arms when Rumi reached out for her, snuggling in close and tilting her head to let Rumi nuzzle right into the scent gland on her neck.
"There we go." Mira's voice was followed by a kiss, pressed right to her ear. It tickled, sending a heat through her that made her shiver. A pleased chuckle made her tremble even more but then Mira just moved to kiss her cheek, soothingly rubbing circles against her stomach. "Sleep, Rumi, we'll be right here when you wake up."
"Promise?" Her own voice was muffled against Zoey's skin, making the alpha giggle and squirm for a moment.
Another kiss pressed to her head, then another, the bodies on both sides of her tightening their hold. So protective, so warm, Rumi felt herself falling asleep almost immediately, purring happily when they answered at the same time.
"We promise, Rumi."
"We'll always be here for you."