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“The three of you delve deeper into the forest. There, you find the dragon that the villagers claimed have been terrorizing them. What do you decide to do next?”
Navia raised her hand. “Can I use persuasion?”
Clorinde looked exasperated—this was only, of course, the fifteenth time Navia had used that talent—but as the game master, she rolled the dice. Thank the archons. “You try to talk to the dragon, but he is angry and unwilling to listen. What do you do next?”
Furina cleared her throat. “I shall use my skills as a bard and talk to the dragon through song!”
She rolled the dice, landing a perfect twenty. Furina began her song, an enchanting melody inviting the dragon to discover the wonders of humanity for himself.
Standing to the side, Clorinde couldn't help but think this wasn’t the first time Furina had sung this song. The verses were too polished, so much so that she doubted even Furina’s improvisation skills could create this on the spot.
Was this how Furina persuaded Neuvillette to come to Fontaine?
Though Clorinde now knew he was the hydro dragon reborn—a secret that she was touched to be trusted with—Neuvillette was still tight-lipped about his first years in Fontaine. Furina too, for that matter. Those early years were something historians often debated about.
Furina finished her song, expression wistful. A moment of silence descended—Clorinde and Navia both letting the dreamy melody drift in the air.
“The dragon is swayed by your song, his previous anger subsiding.” Clorinde continued the story. “He then explains that the villagers-”
The script was interrupted by coughing—Furina was bent over, gasping for air as she shielded her face from view. Clorinde immediately went to rub her back in soothing circles.
“Furina, are you alright?”
“Must be the approaching winter.” Furina responded, waving away their concerns. “I shall make haste to wear more layers in the coming weeks.”
—
Despite the persona she crafted in the past centuries leading many to believe their archon was incompetent, Furina was not dumb . She knew what plagued her ever since she started coughing up flower petals. She had read too many light novels to not immediately know. Hanahaki Disease. A lovely name for the flowers that clouded one’s lungs until they couldn’t breathe anymore.
Leave it up to her to contract a fictional disease.
Unlike many light novel protagonists, however, she was not ignorant to her feelings. It could only ever be Neuvillette with his gentle and understanding nature, one that he hid behind a veil of impartiality. Yet she knew the real Neuvillette, the one outside his role of Chief Justice.
She supposed the appearance of hanahaki confirmed the fact that Neuvillette did not love her back.
Furina had wondered why now? It wasn’t as if her feelings for Neuvillette were nonexistent during their rule together. No, she had always loved him ever since the day she saw him play with the melusine, patiently planting flowers with them. Was it the fifth or sixth decade that she fell for him? Furina could not recall anymore.
Perhaps Focalors’ curse prevented the flowers from manifesting. Or perhaps Neuvillette did return her love when she was the archon. But now did not because she was only human. For why would a dragon sovereign ever fall for a human?
The itch in her throat intensified as she coughed out more petals. Romaritime flowers. The color of Neuvillette’s eyes.
—
Furina didn’t panic. No, rather it was with a kind of resignedness that she went about her routines, accepting her slow death. It was with this same detachment that she trudged to rehearsals. With The Little Oceanid receiving great praise around the nation, Aurelie’s troupe had gained the recognition they deserved.
“Furina! We were just about to start without you!” Delphy exclaimed when she saw her enter the studio.
Furina smiled back at her friend. “Just got caught up in some chores. Sorry I’m late! I believe we were going to practice act one, right? Everyone, in positions!”
It was one of her favorite plays—one that she performed many times in her time as archon. A tragic love story torn apart by society, only to reunite in death.
Delphy and Lauwick took their places as Violetta and Alfredo, a courtesan and noble who yearned for a genuine companionship. The stage was set for the scene of the party and as Alfredo confessed his love for Violetta, the two burst out into duet, one loving and one half-mocking.
Let us raise the chalice of love.
—
“Navia!” Furina opened her door to see the blonde on the other side. “How are you doing?”
“I should be asking you that.” Navia responded. “You keep declining Clorinde and I when we invite you out! Who would have thought you would refuse free cake?”
Furina laughed sheepishly. Pretend everything is okay. “Oh you know,” She waved her hands. “Creative juices were running, I need to finish this script before it disappears from my mind.”
It wasn’t a total lie. She had been working on a script, one about a pair of star crossed lovers who resided in the heavens above.
—
Two weeks in.
Furina thought she was hiding her ailment quite well. Sure, it was uncomfortable swallowing back in the petals, but she had been through worse. Physical pain was nothing compared to mental anguish.
Then, she saw the newspapers when she went out for a quick grocery run. Even as she knew The Daily Fontaine was prone to gossip and tabloid journalism, she could not help herself as she saw Neuvillette’s name.
Iudex Neuvillette has been cutting short trials and calling for recesses more frequently, even postponing several trials. Speculations have abounded as to the reason for his absences. Perhaps Monsieur Neuvillette is simply under the weather? However, some of the more scandalous speculations have…
—
“Neuvillette!” Furina barged into his office. Later, she would realize that this was rude. She was only an ordinary citizen now and should not be barging into the Iudex’s office unprompted. But her old habits were too ingrained, Neuvillette simply being her most trusted confidant rather than the Iudex.
“Furina? You’re here? ”
“This tabloid has been spouting the most ridiculous nonsense about you.”
Neuvillette did not seem to mind her interruption. If she paid more attention, she would see the ghost of a smile outline his lips. “The public will always speculate about figures such as ourselves. You know that well, Furina.”
“Are you sick?” Furina got straight to the point, the only reasonable conclusion for him to skip trials and not the scandalous suggestions that The Daily Fontaine wrote.
“It will not affect my duties if that is what you’re wondering.”
“You!” Furina crossed her arms. “I was not asking about your work… I was asking about you . Don’t even think about lying. You are a terrible liar.”
Neuvillette sighed. “Yes. Yes, I am sick … in a sense.”
Oh… she should have visited him sooner. She couldn’t bear the thought of him in pain, all the while still soldiering through leading the nation. Furina should not have resigned so quickly… perhaps she could have hired more staff to distribute her administrative duties to. She should have made sure that there were procedures in place so that Neuvillette didn’t have to run all the branches of Fontaine’s government.
Fontaine should be glad he is a just ruler though.
Furina browsed his bookshelves, pausing to pull out some papers. “Here, Fontaine Code Section 1013. Write my name here and sign below. And take a break, please .”
In the case where the head of government is indisposed due to sickness or other circumstances, they can appoint a temporary head in their absence.
She did not want to take back her duties as archon, but she knew that Neuvillette would not rest otherwise, having no one to watch over Fontaine. It was a section of the constitution where it was never applicable in their five centuries of rule, but Furina knew he knew the exact lines she was talking about. One couldn’t be the archon nor Iudex without having their codices memorized.
“Furina… you deserve to rest. I can’t–”
Neuvillette suddenly bent over, a hacking cough overtaking his words, staining the carpet with bloodied lakelight lilies. Furina froze before going to Neuvillette’s side, hands on his back as she pushed back his hair. She rubbed gentle circles on his back, hoping that it soothed his pain even a little. Furina wondered how long this had been going on.
“Neuvi… breathe . I will call for Sigewinne to come to the Palais.”
Neuvillette breathed in slowly before sitting upright and turning to her. Flowers covered the floor which might have been beautiful if not for their wilted petals flecked with blood. “Apologies you had to witness that, Furina. Oh, and no need to call for Sigewinne. She was here earlier.”
“Neuvillette, you can’t be serious. I care for you. Don’t ever feel like you have to apologize for an illness of all things. How long has this… hanahaki… been going on?”
“You know of the disease?”
“I read many light novels. Of course I know about it.” If she didn’t think Neuvillette returned her feelings before, this was the final nail in the coffin—Neuvillette would not also have hanahaki if he returned her feelings.
“So who is it that won the esteemed Iudex’s heart?” Furina teased, even as her own heart was shattering piece by piece. “Is it Miss Navia?”
She had heard from the traveler how Neuvillette saved the president of the Spina di Rosula from the primordial waters. Navia was strong, kind, and with her fearless attitude barging into the court to make sure true justice was delivered, Furina could see all too well why Neuvillette would be attracted to her.
She was everything that Furina was not.
“While I highly respect Miss Navia, I do not have romantic feelings for her. I do believe that she and Miss Clorinde have a bit of a dance going in between them though.”
Before Furina could throw out another speculation, Neuvillette spoke again, “Your next play, La Traviata ? How is your troupe faring? I remember you performed it several times in the past centuries. You always played the role of Violetta spectacularly.”
Furina knew it was a blatant attempt to change the subject, appealing to her love for theater. But she couldn’t help feeling touched. That was the kind of person Neuvillette was, always attentive to the things she mentioned to him. His eyes shone with clear interest in her play and Furina drowned in the depths of his eyes.
An itch in her throat rose. No, no, no. She swallowed, trying to prevent the petals from surfacing. She could not let Neuvillette be concerned over her.
“Furina?” His voice was gentle. Furina looked around the office, anywhere but him. On his shelf, there is a miniature dragon figurine, light blue with long antennae flowing behind. It was a gift she had bought him in one of their many years together. She had given it to him as a joke, saying that maybe his dragon form was as tiny as the figurine. Why does he still have it?
Unable to hold it back in, Furina bent over and threw up, romaritime petals scattering to the floor. Neuvillette rushed her to a couch, arms encircling her as the nausea subsided.
In the ensuing silence, neither knew what to say though torrents of thoughts flooded them both.
“And who is it that won the renowned Furina de Fontaine’s favor?” Neuvillette asked, a reversal of Furina’s earlier teasing. Whoever Furina held romantic feelings for was a fool for not loving her. He could not imagine anyone not being captivated by her charm and beauty, her every movement a blessing.
“Ahahahaha… my dear Neuvillette! What a silly question.” Furina ignored the inquiry with a non-answer. “Oh, look at the time! I have to meet up with my troupe to practice.”
“ Furina .” His tone made her pause, but she couldn’t bring herself to turn back and face him.
Later, she realized Neuvillette had never answered her question. He had said it was not Navia, but he had not said who it was. She once thought they confided everything to each other; five centuries left few excuses between them. But could she really blame him when she skirted around his question the same way?
It’s you, Neuvillette, Furina wanted to say. Five centuries of mingling with Fontaine’s aristocracy and meetings with the common folk and her heart had never fluttered the way it did with Neuvillette. She was no stranger to citizens professing their admiration and love for her. What a tragedy that the only one she wanted to hear those words of love from was one who would never say them.
—
Clorinde visited Furina’s apartment one day, bringing several bags of tea. “For your throat. Tea will help with the coughing.”
Furina thanked Clorinde as guilt consumed her. Here she was, again, making everyone around her worry.
She went to brew a cup of tea before noticing that they were all floral blends. She hid the bags in the deepest corner of her cabinets.
—
Five weeks in.
A knock on the door.
She did not move, opting to stay on the couch. The pain in her throat was getting severe and she could not risk throwing up again. It was bad enough that Neuvillette knew. She did not want Clorinde or Navia to find out as well.
“Furina, I know you’re there.” Of course, it’s Neuvillette.
She could never ignore Neuvillette so she rose from the couch, even if the itch in her throat got more persistent. “Neuvi, welcome to my humble abode!” She smiled, pretending that her back was not being stabbed by a thousand needles. She doesn’t even know why she bothered to hide it. Neuvillette already knew . Old habits never died, she guessed.
“Furina,” Neuvillette looked her in the eye as they both settled on the couch. “You have to tell them your feelings… You are my oldest companion and I cannot stand it for you to be in pain.” Or die. He left that part unsaid, still grasping with the concept of Furina’s mortality.
“I can’t. It’s not fair to put that burden on someone.” Furina said. “Besides, I know for a fact they don’t return my feelings.” The last sentence is said humorlessly.
“Then get the surgery.” Neuvillette pressed. “I am a dragon… there is a chance that I can live with the hanahaki. Inconvenient sure, but it may not be fatal. But you are mortal. I cannot bear it if you leave Teyvat, Furina. Not right after you found a new lease on life.”
“That is not an option either.” Furina does not elaborate.
“Furina,” It is almost with anger—he would never be angry with her— that he continued. “You are dying.”
The word snapped something inside of Furina. She pushed down the flowers that threatened to spill and turned to Neuvillette. “And what about you Neuvillette? Why doesn’t the honest and straightforward Iudex confess his feelings? Are you so content to live a life wracked with pain instead of getting a simple surgery?”
It’s different, he wanted to say. But faced with her righteous fury, weren’t they both in the same boat? Both too loving and self-sacrificing to give up their love.
A violent cough overtook the both of them, collapsing to the floor as a spray of flowers littered Furina’s apartment floor. Both wracked in pain, neither could move to comfort the other. At long last, the coughing subsided. The romaritime flowers mixed with lakelight lilies to form a grotesque bouquet.
The two cleaned the mess in silence, the rug still speckled with blood even after their best efforts. As Neuvillette rose, he croaked, “Please, Furina. Think about it.”
Furina watched listlessly as he walked to her door and some part of her broke. “Wait.”
He stopped.
“Stay with me. Please, for tonight.”
Neuvillette’s expression softened, his hand dropping from the doorknob. He hesitated, as if debating whether that would be a good idea. Because of course, he loved someone else and not her. Then, by some miracle, he stays and that night, they lie side by side on her bed.
Perhaps Furina was tempting fate by having the object of her unrequited affections next to her… surely, this would make her hanahaki worse. But for once, she would accept her fate if it meant having one last moment of peace with him.
The two fell asleep, comforted by the warmth of companionship.
—
The flowers were crowding her lungs, sure and slowly. It was getting harder and harder to breathe. She had long stopped attending her rehearsals, citing a mild illness. She pushed away Clorinde and Navia whenever they visited her, saying she was busy. The least she could do is not inconvenience anyone with her death.
Archons, she should have made a bucket list and tried to complete everything before she inevitably passes. She, at least, mustered up the strength to write a final will and a letter to her oldest and dearest companion.
—
My dearest, Neuvillette:
If you’re reading this letter, then I’m long gone from Teyvat. I am sorry that I was a coward, unable to say in person what I will write in this letter. Words were always supposed to be my strong suit and yet, I find myself struggling to find the right combination to tell you everything.
If one were to describe our respective personalities, they might assume that I’m the sun while you’re the moon. Certainly, the persona I donned as the hydro archon did nothing to dissuade that fact, always being in the spotlight. While to the masses, you were more reserved. But they did not know that you were actually the sun who shone so brightly that you lit up the moon. Every day when I thought all was hopeless, I turned to you, my stalwart supporter as certain as the sun would rise in the morning. You were my sun.
Now, perhaps you were wondering what the point of this letter was. Perhaps it is unfair to you, but I hope you will have it in you to forgive me for my selfishness. The truth is for centuries, I have loved you. I don’t know when it began—perhaps my affections began when you so gently offered the melusines a home in Fontaine. Perhaps it was the way that you still cared for me and saw under my mask of Focalors, that I was not the arrogant, superficial goddess I pretended to be.
Please don’t mourn me for too long and don’t heed the contents of this letter much. I know there is someone else who holds your heart and I know that person must be pure of heart and noble for you would love no other. I wish for sunny skies and that the person you love will finally return your feelings. It would be unfair if the Hydro Dragon was left alone without someone by his side. Thank you for the past five centuries. Farewell, Neuvillette.
Love,
Furina
—
Nine weeks in.
Neuvillette barged into Furina’s apartment unceremoniously. Did he always have keys to her apartment?
They both stare at each other, a pile of romaritime flowers in front of Furina. Before, the petals would only be speckled with blood. Now, entire flowers were encased in blood, staining the carpet a deep crimson.
As the Iudex, Neuvillette was usually calm, resistant to the wave of emotions often exhibited by the defendants. He let go of those restraints now.
“Furina, you are being selfish. ” Neuvillette spoke, in the heat of anger, seeing her cough, seeing the flowers on the ground, seeing her blood. “Think of all the people who will miss you when you’re gone. Clorinde, Navia, your theater troupe. I will miss you, Furina. Is it really worth it to not get the surgery?”
Immediately though, he wanted to take it back, noticing the hurt blooming across her face. That was not how he wanted to greet her. She was the most selfless person Neuvillette knew. He was the one who was selfish, wanting Furina to stay by his side.
“Selfish? Really, Neuvillette.” Furina laughed hysterically. Perhaps it was the fact that she was on death’s doors that everything came spilling out. “I have suffered alone for five centuries to save Fontaine. Every time I thought about confiding in anyone, I could not bring myself to risk it. One mistake and the nation could be flooded. You don’t know how many times I was on the verge of spilling everything to you, Neuvi. I wanted to so badly.
But I could not be selfish. Like how I cannot be selfish now because I cannot confess to you on yet another matter. Because you so clearly harbor feelings for someone else. And I would die before I gave up my love for you or forced you into loving someone you don’t!”
Furina’s eyes widened as she realized what she said. She did not mean to say that last part. “I… Neuvi, I…” She stuttered. “I didn’t mean…” She buried her face into her hands, tears inadvertently falling. Archons, she messed everything up.
It was silent, baring the light hiss of the tea that was brewing in the kitchen. Furina could not decipher Neuvillette’s emotions through her tears. Was it pity on his face?
“I’m sorry, Furina.” Neuvillette gently took her hands, wiping off her tears. This was the part where he rejected her, right? “We are both idiots.”
At that, Furina let out a wet laugh. Neuvillette, always so prim and proper, being so crass.
“I am so sorry. If I had realized sooner… I suppose we were both blindsighted by our hanahaki.” He tilted her head upwards with his fingertips so they were eye to eye. “The person I love is you, Furina. It has always been you.”
Furina’s tears slowed, a hopeful feeling erupting as she looked at Neuvillette’s purple eyes. They were so beautiful, shining with all his unsaid emotions until now. “Really?”
“A special you. A unique you. ” He repeated the words she sent him those four centuries ago inviting him to Fontaine. “It has always been you, even if all my instincts were telling me to despise you, to take back my authority. I could never have done it myself.”
Furina sniffled a bit at his words. “It has always been you too, Neuvillette.”
“May I?” Neuvillette glanced at her lips.
Furina responded by surging up, meeting her lips with his. Her hands wrapped around his waist and his cusped her cheeks. They both tasted like the flowers they coughed up earlier and teeth clacked in inexperience. It was imperfect and perfect all at the same time, but the two of them wouldn’t have it any other way.
Later that night, both of them laid in Furina’s bed, neither of them willing to leave the others’ side yet. Neuvillette wrapped her arms around Furina as she snuggled into his chest. Their fingers intertwined, his hand rubbing small circles on the back of her hand.
“We are both idiots, Neuvi. How did we lead a nation?”