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Atsushi had never been a light sleeper.
He couldn’t afford to be. He slept through countless chaotic nights at the orphanage: children crying from sickness, hunger, or loneliness, and adults reprimanding them for making noise after curfew. He'd learned to tune everything out and focus on his own thoughts, and sleep would become a temporary shield from the outside world.
The slam of his front door was enough to break through that barrier entirely.
Atsushi shot up, eyes bleary as his brain tried to process what was happening. He didn’t have the time to comprehend any of it. The wraith he couldn’t make out in the darkness of his apartment was darting for him, quickly. He didn’t even get the pleasure to consider moving as the blur that Atsushi slowly began to recognize as Akutagawa stood over him, using Rashomon to jerk him upright by his neck. He gasped as he was pulled out from his bed, now hanging over the bare floor as he clawed at the appendage around his throat.
“What the hell-“
“Seven days,” Akutagawa snarled.
His tone made whatever fight Atsushi had in him dissipate in an instant. He stopped his struggling, stopped his flailing, and focused instead on breathing through the quickly tightening restraint on his neck. Akutagawa wasn’t yelling in anger as he normally did when provoked; no, the quiet growl in the way that he spoke currently was more blistering than any shout that Atsushi had ever heard from him before. It made him briefly consider that this could be the time his rival chose to actually kill him.
“Seven days,” Akutagawa repeated. “I was stuck on a job for seven days with barely anything to feed on. Because of you and your idiotic promise.”
The grip around his throat tightened. Atsushi wanted to reply that Akutagawa never had to agree to the promise in the first place, but panic started to override his mind as his airway fully closed. He desperately clawed at the dark arm beneath him, but it did nothing as the vampire pulled him closer. Through stars, Atsushi met his eyes.
With their faces mere inches apart, Akutagawa bared his teeth. “What’s stopping me from draining you where you stand?”
A tense moment passed, followed by a second. Then a third. Atsushi lost his sense of time as the roar of his own blood pulsing in his skull filled his ears. Just as he was coming to terms with his death, Akutagawa dropped him with a scoff. He fell unceremoniously, his knees buckling as he hit the cool ground. Momentum led him directly into Akutagawa’s body.
Atsushi gasped around the newfound air that filled his lungs. He rested his head on Akutagawa’s hip as he regained his breath, his rival unmoving before him. To his credit, Akutagawa didn’t rush him; Atsushi was given a handful of minutes to regulate his breathing, to wake up whatever was left of his tired body. When he no longer felt like he was teetering on the edge of blacking out, Atsushi sat back on his haunches to look up at Akutagawa.
For the first time of the night, Atsushi got a good look at Akutagawa. His counterpart looked terrible. Gaunt. The dark circles around his eyes were deeper than normal, the thin ring of crimson around his big grey eyes dim. Truthfully, it was a miracle in itself that Akutagawa hadn’t lost his restraint yet.
“You’ve been starving for a week, but came here before feeding?” Atsushi questioned, swallowing hard.
He quickly learned that this was the wrong response. The words had barely left his mouth before Rashomon was back on him. One of its arms wrapped around Atsushi’s wrists tightly, effectively tying them behind his back; another grabbed his chin and forced him to look up. Akutagawa snarled.
“I’m here to make a compromise.”
Atsushi pushed a bit against the restraints. “And it couldn’t wait until morning?”
It was a genuine question, but one that probably should’ve stayed an inside thought. Rashomon tightened their grasp around him to the point of bruising, and Atsushi was unsure if he’d seen this much smoldering anger before - in Akutagawa or anyone else before him. Some twisted part of him wanted to see how much worse the vampire could get, how much further he could be pressed.
“I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t dire, Jinko,” Akutagawa answered.
What does this have to do with me, Atsushi thought. It sounded too harsh in his mind though, even if he was attempting to push buttons. He reeled the question back in, reworked it. “How can I help?”
At this, Akutagawa simply looked down at him for a moment before he huffed, shifting his gaze downward. Rashomon completely retreated back to him; Atsushi took the newfound freedom to rub at his wrists and check for bruising before his gaze fell back onto the vampire.
“Your regeneration,” Akutagawa explained, “It may be able to solve our… impasse. I wouldn’t need to kill, but I also wouldn’t need to starve myself any longer. In theory, you should be able to restore any blood loss fast enough to avoid death, correct?”
Atsushi’s eyes widened. The consideration hadn’t ever crossed his mind, which admittedly was foolish on both of their parts. The answer had been in front of them since the beginning, since they met, but only desperation made it show its face.
Belatedly noticing that Akutagawa had been waiting for an answer, Atsushi nodded. “I hadn’t thought about it I guess, but there’s a chance that could work.”
The vampire licked his lips, nostrils slightly flared. “Would you be willing to test it?”
“Of course.” The answer was out of Atsushi’s mouth before he could process that he’d said anything at all. There was no hesitation, no thought given to the question at hand. Atsushi himself wasn’t entirely sure why he had been so quick to agree: for the good of Akutagawa, to protect those who were potential future victims, for his own selfish desire to be needed. Regardless of the subconscious intention, he couldn’t say that he didn’t want to test the theory.
After staring at Atsushi for a moment, as if trying to decipher if he was serious or not, Akutagawa knelt down to reach his level. On his knees, he took a step closer, their knees knocking together; the movement sent a jolt through Atsushi’s core.
The tendrils of Rashomon creeped back up on Atsushi, slowly wrapping around his torso. It was different this time, though; the ringlets seemed to be trying to help hold Atsushi up rather than tie him down, as if it was preparing for the weretiger to be unable to stay upright on his own. Atsushi didn’t have the mental capacity to think about it, not when Akutagawa’s eyes raked over him so thoroughly. He flushed at the thought of being not just looked at, but seen.
“Jinko,” Akutagawa said softly, juxtaposing how wildly his eyes stared at the other. “Tell me now. If you don’t want to go through with this, we don’t have to. But you need to say it now.”
Atsushi swallowed. The only thing that ran through his mind was the thought of Akutagawa asking anyone else to help him, which settled poorly in his stomach. With the thought came a simmering ire, a jealousy he could not name, nor did he want to. He ignored it as he tilted his head to the side, exposing his throat to the vampire. “Take what you need.”
Akutagawa wasted no time. He pounced in an instant, taking an arm and snaking around Atsushi’s waist while his other hand reached around to cup the back of Atsushi’s head. Atsushi would’ve made a comment on the compromising position, had he been given a moment to speak. But just as quickly as Akutagawa pulled him close did his rival bite down, fangs piercing Atsushi’s delicate skin.
Atsushi hissed in pain, but didn’t flinch, didn’t move. He’d never given much thought to what a vampire’s bite felt like, but even then, he would have never pictured it as it was currently unfolding. The sting of fangs as they punctured his throat made sense, but he didn’t expect the high that slowly overcame him. Atsushi had never done any kind of drug, at least nothing that wasn’t prescribed to him from a doctor when he was ill, but he had to assume that this had to be close to what it felt like. He felt warm, he felt light; his thoughts were clouded by a thick fog, replacing the pain he was expecting with nothing but the heat of the body next to him.
Seconds, minutes, hours could have passed. Time was a foreign concept, and all Atsushi could focus on were the limbs holding him, the desperate slurping coming from right below his ear. All of it made Atsushi want to squirm: the contact, the sounds, the intimacy. Yet his limbs, heavy as lead, melted deeper into the shadowy embrace keeping him still.
Atsushi’s vision became spotty after an indeterminable amount of time had passed, not for the first time that night. A whimper left his mouth, Akutagawa’s name on his tongue as his hand slid to one of Rashomon’s arms. He squeezed gently.
Carefully, Akutagawa retracted his fangs, lapping at the wound with a fondness that Atsushi wasn’t in the right headspace to fully process. When the vampire sat back, he licked his lips, relief etched into his features. The atmosphere had completely shifted, leaving Atsushi much more relaxed than when he was woken up.
The peaceful moment was ripped from him as Akutagawa stood from his seated position, pulling his body away and beginning to step away from the scene left on the floor. Though Rashomon remained, Atsushi’s eyes flew open wide immediately at the loss of touch, an unexpected wave of panic washing over him as he was left alone in the dark of his apartment. He called out to Akutagawa, nothing more than a pathetic mewl as he tried to get up and follow after him. Rashomon held him firmly in place, though they seemingly tried to calm Atsushi as one of their arms moved to his side, nuzzling against him softly. It did little to comfort the fear that clung to the inside of his chest.
“Easy, easy,” Akutagawa called back, voice reassuring as he panned back into Atsushi’s field of vision. “Lay back down, Jinko. I’m right here.”
In his arms, the vampire held a blanket he had grabbed off of Atsushi’s bed as well as a bottle of water he’d found nearby. Akutagawa sat both down on the ground next to them before he shimmied out of his coat, kneeling back to the cool floor. First, he laid the coat over Atsushi, followed up by draping the blanket over him. Atsushi hadn’t realized he had been shivering until the covers were placed on him, the warmth appreciated as the comforting scent of Akutagawa surrounded him. It was earthy, akin to the scent of rain before it began to fall. Immediately it gave him the solace of home, and the panic pumping in his blood was cut by the overwhelming feeling of safety. Atsushi closed his eyes, reveling in the comfort.
“You did so well,” Akutagawa praised, atypical from his usual demeanor. “Will you sit up for a moment? Eating right away may make you sick, but you at least need water.”
Atsushi groaned, but allowed Rashomon to tilt his head up slightly. Akutagawa handed him the water, and Atsushi’s arm shook with effort as he took a few sips from the bottle. He passed it back without putting the cap back on, the small plastic piece dropping between them. Atsushi just laid back down, eyes drifting closed once more.
After closing the bottle and seemingly setting it to the side, Akutagawa’s hand found its way into Atsushi’s hair, idly fingering through the uneven locks. Though awkward and stiff, there was an underlying care in the gesture. The weretiger, damn his biology, began to purr softly. He was unsure what was going on with him mentally, why he was craving closeness that he would otherwise never push for so boldly, yet it still wasn’t enough. With the assistance of Rashomon, Atsushi rolled onto his side. He curled up against Akutagawa, shifting his position so he was resting his head in the vampire’s lap. Akutagawa didn’t seem to mind the stretch of silence, nor the change of position, his hand still tracing through Atsushi’s hair.
Atsushi laid there for a long time, shallow breaths rising and falling from his chest. Despite how exhausted the night left him, he still found himself unable to sleep, quietly resting and letting himself recover. At several points in the night Atsushi considered the idea of migrating to the bed, yet he couldn’t bring himself to move for fear of ruining the fragile moment that was being held.
It was only when the sun began to rise did Atsushi finally attempt to speak, voice scratchy and strained.
“What happened?” Atsushi asked, barely above a whisper.
Akutagawa’s hand finally stilled in Atsushi’s hair, a deep sigh leaving his lips. It took a moment for him to reply. “I’m not completely sure. Vampire bites generally release a small amount of sedation as well as other side effects, typically to keep prey from escaping. Because your blood kept regenerating, it’s possible the drug kept repetitively making its way through your system.”
Atsushi made a soft noise of acknowledgement. He pointedly didn’t ask about the state of mind he’d been thrown into after the feeding; if he uttered what happened out loud, it made it all the more real. He wasn’t sure he would ever recover from admitting the desperate need he’d had for Akutagawa’s presence in that moment. Talking that situation out would be a later issue, he decided.
“How often do you feed?” Atsushi asked. Akutagawa snorted above him.
“Now that I’ve actually eaten a full meal, probably once a week or so, but not as much in quantity as tonight,” Akutagawa explained, “I think I took too much last night, even for you, Jinko. I… apologize, if that was too much. I hope I didn’t scare you out of our agreement.”
Atsushi thought on it for a moment; if he really wanted to do this once a week for the foreseeable future, to tether himself to someone who previously was ready to kill him in an instant. It was a terrible idea, probably. Any one of his friends would advise against this vehemently, as would any stranger.
And yet, the thought of Akutagawa needing someone else this desperately made him nauseous. The fact that Akutagawa knew how to care for him after everything happened meant that he’d had this happen with past patrons. Atsushi silently pleaded that he’d be the last one.
“Atsushi?” Akutagawa prodded, clearly nervous at the silence following his previous statement. Atsushi would have made fun of Akutagawa using his actual name, but looking up at him made all comments leave his thoughts in an instant.
Atsushi had always believed that Akutagawa was nice to look at. Porcelain skin, beautiful eyes; his vampiric touches enhanced what Atsushi assumed were his natural features, and it left him absolutely stunning. In this light though, skin slightly more flushed and lively, eyes a vibrant crimson now that he wasn’t starving himself, Atsushi thought he’d never looked more beautiful.
“Not at all,” Atsushi answered after ogling for a moment longer, looking away when Akutagawa cast his gaze downward to look him in the eye. “Guess we’ll actually have to start working together if you can’t kill me anymore.”
Akutagawa gave him a soft, genuine smile, a rare sight for anyone. He looked back up, watching the sun inch further into the sky. “I suppose that wouldn’t be so bad.”