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A Thousand Years

Summary:

"What the-" He mummered he must be hallucinating— but right as he was about to try again Eddie sprinted past him— through him, and kneeled down to a patient— buck assumed. But it still didn't explain the fact that Eddie when through him

"No, no, no, no" Eddie kept muttering, "hey Ed-" Buck was shocked. The man before him, was laying in a pool of blood, like he was swimming in it. His neck kept releasing blood, drowning that person staining the white tiles, but it isn't just any person, when he looked at the man laying.

It was him. Sprawled in his own blood, eyes half open.

 

Or

Buck dies and his ghost haunt Eddie Diaz.

Notes:

HALLOOO I Am Back dw guys I just got lightly hit by a car but I'm fine, It beats getting almost kidnapped and then poisoned by inhaling to much paint.. The getting hit by a car is more embarrassing than it sounds like lol..

anyways have fun reading this I guess?

 

Title from the song
Thousand Years by: Christina Perri

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

When a human dies, sometimes when it's unexpected and they have something unfinished, their will is enough to turn them into a ghost or a spirit however you like it. A ghost will wander forever in the land of living until they find their sole purpose— so that they could finally move on. Sometimes they don't know why they are there, or the only thing that is keeping them tethered is their loved ones 

 

Few ghost can only watch and hope for their loved ones to do the mission for them. But other ghost— those who are persistent and has a burning passion, could interact with things and communicate— at best they could talk to the people they loved and cherished the most. 

 


 

Evan Buckley was one of them, Buck has always been in the wrong place at a wrong time. Or maybe at the right place at the wrong time. This time it was a bank robbery, Buck is only there to deposit savings he and Eddie have been preparing for Christopher's Christmas presents and another separate savings to buy Eddie a real wedding ring. It has only been a week since he proposed to Eddie and while Eddie was fine with the candy pop ring Buck had given– he thinks it's sweet and all that– but Buck still wants him to have a very special ring when a bunch of armed robbers– two robbers barged into the bank, guns raised as they screamed for everyone to be silent. 

 

The robbers slowly approached every person in the bank, grabbing their phones so no one would be able to call for help. Soon, one of them approached him. With a serious gaze, the robber raised his hand and opened his palm. He hesitated, thinking twice about handing over his phone, but the robber pressed a gun to his head, leaving him with no choice but to comply.

 

"Now that we're on the same page, here's what's going to happen," the taller robber announced, loud enough to be heard amid the sobs. "Line up in that corner — and under no circumstances will any of you do something I don't like, or I will start shooting." His eyes swept the room, daring anyone to challenge him.

 

Buck's eyes followed one of the robbers as he scanned the room, predatory and deliberate, until his gaze landed on a young girl. Without hesitation, the robber snatched her up. Her mother immediately fought back, clinging to her daughter with everything she had — screaming, begging — until the robber silenced her with a brutal pistol-whip to the head. The woman crumpled, crying out as she hit the floor.

 

That was all Buck needed to see.

 

Buck, being Buck, stepped into the danger without a second thought — welcoming it with open arms. He crossed the room and dropped to his knees beside the wounded mother, who was still screaming and clutching her stomach. From the look of her, he assumed she was pregnant. He pressed his hand gently to the wound on her head, trying to steady her.

      

“Ma’am are you okay?” Buck questioned the Woman, checking her head that already is forming angry red bruises from where the boot of the gun hit her.

 

The woman didn't answer his question, only focused on getting to her daughter while she desperately tried to escape Buck’s hold so she could run to her daughter. 

 

“Ma’am you need to calm down” He said, struggling to hold her in place. But the woman wouldn't listen “Ma'am if you keep disobeying the robbers they might actually shoot your daughter and you” He stated again, and this time the woman actually calmed down and stopped resisting.

 

Buck breathed a sigh of relief and watched as the robber faced outside in a part of the bank where the curtains isn't drawn shut– a gun resting uncomfortably in the little girl's temple as an attempt to intimidate the LAPD outside who quickly arrived after one of the tellers had pressed the silent alarm in the midst of panic and purely muscle memory. 

 

The girl's face was wet with tears and her mother was crying on his shoulder now. The screams of demand of the robber who was holding the little girl echoed in the rooms but the crying and plead of the people inside overthrew the robber’s voice. “One more step and the blood of this girl will be at your hands” The robber speaks up, digging the gun deep in her head as she screams. 

 

He looked between the mother and the kid who was thrashing at the robber's grasp. He thinks of Christopher– He thinks of the mother who would be devastated when one of her kids will die at this encounter– and Buck is a first responder, designed to save lives of the innocent, to serve and protect that's the oath he took– so he did what's the logical thing to do. Step in. 

 

“Hey you don't need to do that, she's just a kid” He said raising his arms wide to show he’s no threat.

 

But as he stood, the other robber must've startled and immediately pointed the gun at him— fingers brushed upon the trigger.

 

and a bang resonated in the room, filling in the cries as he fell down hard on the floor, people screamed. 

 

He stares on a ceiling for a while, wondering what just happened, but he acts quickly, standing and scanning the room for injuries. He looked outside, barely able to see anything, and saw a figure desperately running towards the crime scene, someone he knows too well. 

 

Eddie

 

Eddie who is trying to jump over the barricade, being held by the team while he shouts something incoherent. His ears are still ringing from that warning shot. 



Going back to observing, he shouted Is anyone hurt? to the   frightened crowd– their ears covered as they tried to burrow their faces in their legs. The screams and cries filtered the silence. But No one answered his question— he assumed they were panicking  so he decided to try again. 

 

"Is anyone hurt?" But before he finished asking, the robber flinched before he fell down hard, blood immediately pooled at his head— the girl fell down hard with the robber– running immediately to her mother who then hugged her tight. He was about to approach the girl– when he saw his colleague come in first, the other robber— the one who shot first was kneeling on the floor, the gun had been discarded and his hand was raised above as a sign of defeat. 

 

Great, the snipers have gotten a clear shot and all is fine now.

 

Buck releases a breath he didn't know he was holding 

 

"Alright clear the room" A familiar voice appeared, Eddie. 

 

But before he sprinted and hugged his best friend, Eddie ran past him and Buck was quite confused. Why would Eddie ignore him? 

 

After a while, Eddie stopped dead in his tracks.

 

"I know I got myself into another near death situation Eddie but this time I'm fine— Truly" He explains in hopes for Eddie to stop ignoring him but Eddie is lost within his thoughts and appears to be staring far from where he was standing, was there someone injured? But why would Eddie be shocked? 

 

"No" Eddie whispered “I was hoping I was wrong when I heard the shot” 

 

"Hey Eddie" Buck said as he waved his hand back and forth to Eddie's eyes. Eddie still stares far beyond and looks like he was about to tear up "I'm here you know stop with the prank now”

 

"Okay, I'm tired with your playing, I said I'm-" As he was about to grab Eddie's shoulder but suddenly his hand went past Eddie's “-here”

 

"What the-" He mummered he must be hallucinating— but right as he was about to try again Eddie sprinted past him— through him, and kneeled down to a patient— buck assumed. But it still didn't explain the fact that Eddie when through him

 

"No, no, no, no" Eddie kept muttering, "hey Ed-" Buck was shocked. The man before him, was laying in a pool of blood, like he was swimming in it. His neck kept releasing blood, drowning that person staining the white tiles, but it isn't just any person, when he looked at the man laying. 

 

It was him. Sprawled in his own blood, eyes half open. 

 

"No hey, Eddie Im here" Buck desperately waved at Eddie, touching him— to no avail, his screams— his touch all went through Eddie. "EDDIE that is not me, do you hear me?!" Buck said, but he just watched as Eddie applied pressure to his neck the moment he found the entry and screamed for Hen and Chimney.

 

Chim and Hen came rushing in the room, Hen had her hands to her mouth, needless the site and shocked by what they saw they still remained professional. 

 

“Chim, check his breathing, I'll check his pulse, Eddie keep pressure a little bit higher don't push too deep” ” Hen ordered as she directed Eddie's hand a little bit higher from where he was holding pressure. “there”

 

his chest isn't rising and falling "Hen, I can't feel him breathing" Chim said as he laid a Sethetoscope in Buck's lungs confirming what all of them had been fearing.

 

"I can't feel a pulse here either," Hen said as she pressed two of her fingers on Buck's wrist. 

 

Eddie shouted "Chim, switch!" Chim reacted quickly ready to replace Eddie's hand with his, as Eddie removed the pressure off Buck's neck. Chim immediately stepped in— not wanting to waste precious time. 

 

Eddie interviewed his fingers and pressed hard in Buck's Chest. Once, twice, thrice. "don't do this to us Buck" 

 

Eddie kept pressing the compressions slightly, jolting Buck’s neck but Chim kept constant pressure, blood still going in rivelets in the gaps between his fingers. Eddie kept the compression steady, an audible crack of Buck’s ribs can be heard but that didn't stop Eddie. 

 

Buck also placed his hand on his chest, waiting to feel anything. Regardless he felt nothing. As he watched helplessly— as Eddie kept trying so hard to bring him back even if he’s exhausted and sweat formed at the corner of his face he didn't stop him– he couldn't help but fall onto his knees and wept. 

 

Buck didn't know that ghosts can cry— let alone be true. And yet... 

 

Buck Watch as Chim let go of the pressure, blood no longer flows like waterfalls– Eddie being focused on compression didn't notice until he stepped in and pushed his hand away. "No" Buck heard Eddie scream. He saw as chimney looked at his watch and 

 

"DOA at scene, 7:13 am" the tremble from Hen’s voice.

 

He heard Eddie scream so painfully, and loud enough to strain his voice as it echoed on the empty bank. As he hit the tiled floor each time- he grabbed Buck's head and cradled it close to his chest— not minding about blood. As Eddie cries, no one tries to pry him away from his corpse. 

 

I mean, who could. It's Buck and Eddie. 

 

Eddie stared at him— at his body— through his eyes one last time, as he reached his bloody fingers and closed it. Eddie slowly brushed his fingers from his bloody curls, something traditional at their household. He cupped his cheeks and blood from his hands smeared at Buck's face. Even though he was basically bathed with his own blood, somehow it looked like he was just sleeping. 

 

Buck watched as his co-workers mourned him, Chim crying, Hen freezing up— staring over at him and Eddie, and Bobby— whom he treated as a father stood there, shocked, barely believing the sight in front of him. 

 

It took a while for Bobby to reach his radio and muttered words he never imagined he'd speak

 

“Captain Nash to dispatch, we have a 10-7” voice weaving as his hands tremble professionalism was absent.

 

“Dispatch Maddie Han speaking, condolences to your firehouse captain, I will put the firehouse on offline” her voice tried to be professional and steady but that doesn't mask the fear creeping in her voice 

 

“the firefighter is identified to be fireman Buckley, DOA at the scene” Bobby let go of the radio as Maddie replied with two quick words mandatory to them. But that doesn't mean there is no pain in her voice

 

“Copy that, Captain Nash”

 

As Buck walked towards his Family, a bright light shone behind him. A figure– a silhouette to be exact stepped out, hands reaching forward waiting for him to reach back. 

 

at a slight moment– Buck glances back to his family and at the light ready to take him.

 

No, he said, Buck can't come. He has to make sure they're okay. So Buck turned his back completely from the blinding light and stepped further away, and just as quickly it appeared, the same goes when it went away. 

 

He stared at his dead body, they were moving him— carefully, afraid a slight jolt might hurt him. They treat his body like he was still in there, alive and breathing. There's no rush— there's no need to. They swiftly placed him on the gurney, a white sheet slowly draped over him— feet first, until it reached his head covering him entirely. 

 

It doesn't look like him, it looks like anyone else— but he knows well that he is the one under those sheets– one that immediately turns red as the blood smeared from whatever is left on his body transferred on the white sheets. He watched as the gurney carefully rolled outside the bank, the flashing lights of red and blue illuminated— even if the sun is as bright. Firefighters and Cops lined up in a perfect stance, raising their hands at their forehead as the gurney rolled down towards the open ambulance doors. 

 

His family climbed with him— it doesn't matter if it's cramped inside— what matters is that they are with him. especially Bobby and Eddie. Eddie who still has his hands intertwined with his— Bobby who has his callused hands in his head, carefully digging through the curls that's peeking out of the sheet that covers him. 

 

He climbed inside with them. Sitting at the edge of the gurney where his feet hang seems uncomfortable for him, he keeps his head above, afraid to look at the way his soul passes through his mortal body.  

 

The ride to the hospital— was silent, Eddie still grasping his hand, his thumb rubbing circles on the back of his hand– while crying, Buck surely knows that Eddie is dehydrated by the amount of tears dropping in the sheets that covered his body. 

 

The ambulance didn't speed up, the lights weren't on, they carefully swept the traffic. Shortly after— the ambulance stopped, doors began to open and a bunch of nurses and a doctor— and just like his fellow first responders they all lined up, and saluted. The 118 slowly pushed the gurney inside the hospital, doctors waiting to claim his body. He watched far away as his family stopped at the glass doors. Chimney Repeating the time of death to the doctor. 

 

“our jobs stops at these glass doors”

 

They watch as the doctor claims his body and whisks it away from where they couldn't see anymore. Eddie tried to follow but was immediately stopped by Hen and Bobby, Hen slowly shaking her head

 

As they all fall down on their knees hugging each other tightly.

 

Buck has his head down

 

.... 

 

Shortly after, his sister— Maddie arrived, her eyes sunken red with tears, behind him was Josh, if anyone is guessing, Josh drove Maddie to the hospital.

 

“Did they already take him?” Maddie’s voice trembled as she curled his brows and tears once again flowed at her face.  

 

Bobby didn't answer, he just simply lowered his head— his gaze. 

 

Maddie broke down crying

 

Buck approached slowly, carefully stroking Maddie’s cheek in an attempt to wipe off her tears, Buck never liked Maddie sad and crying, and even though he has no more body and can't be felt, he raised his arms and embraced Maddie.

 

After quite a long time of waiting, sitting at the hard and plastic hospital chairs, a morgue technician slowly came out of the heavy doors, notifying them that Buck’s body is ready for final goodbyes. 

 

The 118 and he entered the morgue, he saw the way the embalmer took care of his body, cleaning the blood of him, stitching the gaping hole in his neck. Placing a chapstick to hide his pale— tinged lips. Then, he draped a fresh white sheet up to his neck, showing only his face. The embalmer in front of him, sighed— removed his gloves and mask,nodded at the team behind him and stepped out of the room– giving them privacy. 

 

Shortly after, footsteps can be heard echoing at the rooms he looked behind and he saw his family. Slowly approaching his body that's been cleaned of his blood. 

 

"My baby brother," Maddie said cupping his pale cheeks. 

 

Eddie laid his hands on Maddie's shoulder offering comfort, as Maddie burrowed her face onto Eddie's chest— wetting his clothes at the process. Eddie stares at Buck. 

 

Eddie held his curls, then his birthmark “you're so cold” Eddie said as he reached for his neck carefully removing his saint Christopher's medallion and slowly placed it at his neck. Buck reached his Panthom hands at the medallion forming a fond smile.

 

His family took their time to fuss over him, calling him pet names and even Hen sang him a lullaby. 

 

Evan Buckley watches as the scene unfolds, unable to do anything.

 

—---  

As the 118 slowly stepped out of the room, there was a nurse waiting for them right outside, there at her hands, a zip lock bag was on her hands, as she smiled softly at them she raised her hands and stretched it towers over them.

 

He saw Eddie be the one who stepped out to hold his belongings. In a Medium-sized zip lock his wallet, phones, clothes are neatly placed. Eddie held tightly on the things in his hand. As if it was the only thing Evan Buckley left in this world. 

 

He saw Eddie walk away from the hospital doors. He saw Bobby drive him off to their house using the ambulance, sure technically not allowed but they've been quite rebellious ever since. He saw Eddie walk in those doors, kneeled at Christopher who is eagerly waiting for both of his dad to come home today. Christopher sat on the porch of their house admiring the view, the chirp of the birds and the gust of winds, unaware of the tragedy that struck upon them.

 

Christopher looked at his dad and his face quickly lit up with a wide smile, the one that kept melting Buck's heart. “Dad” Christopher screamed. Waiving his hand.

 

He saw as Eddie slowly walked towards Chris and gently placed his hands onto Christopher's shoulder.

 

"Chris" Eddie started, voice hoarse from the screaming and crying

 

That moment, Christopher's smile died instantly, replaced with worry he asked "Dad, what happened, why are you crying?" Vhristopher tilted his head as he slowly reached his little hands to wipe off his father's tears. 

 

"Buck— uh, Buck went to the bank, and— and there was an Accident" Eddie stuttered. 

 

"But he's okay right?" The  young man asked.

 

Eddie couldn't answer, for the third time this day— he broke down this time in front of his son. Buck watched as Chris raised his hands again and patted his father's back, offering comfort. Then, Hugging him tightly. 

 

"You're gonna be okay, dad" As Eddie hugged back and wept an ocean worth of tears at the porch of their house.

 

Buck couldn't do anything— he wanted so badly to hug them tight, telling them that it's okay. That he— them, they're gonna be okay.

 

But he couldn't, he looked at his phantom hands, the light going through and the grass from where he was standing was visible at the palm of his hands. 

---

It was Eddie who arranged his funeral, making sure that he was treasured— Eddie chose the brightest photo of Buck.  The flowers are bright roses, not just white. There were some carnations laid together with the roses but nothing beats the overwhelming amounts of Forget-me-nots Eddie brought that's decorating the whole coffin. Buck brushed his hands at the flowers— but as always it went through. He stared again at his body inside the coffin, skin still pale but not as pale, guessing the amount of make-up placed. He was wearing his uniform, the flag was draped at his casket and the neatly folded gear lies at its end. The helmet— 118, sat neatly at top. 

 

The funeral was held at the firehouse, even if Buck didn't die on duty— he died as a hero and that's more than enough. People came by at the firehouse, both he knew as a friend, and those strangers who claimed was saved by him during his daring rescues. 

 

May, Harry, Micheal, Linda, Josh, even Cameroon are all there. It makes his heart flutter and he can't help but smile. A bunch of people crowded at his casket. He overheard that those are the people he saved during the Tsunami. The day he barely remembered. They left flowers at his grave. 

 

Buck stood at the very back as everyone sat— waiting for the eulogy of the Chief, and then his family. The chief delivered a beautiful speech, telling how resilient Buck is regardless of the situation they're in. The way he constantly disobeys orders and that it's no surprise when he does. Soon, Bobby was next. 

 

Bobby stood proudly, "Buck— he was one of my best men, even though he is stubborn as hell, he'll do anything to serve and protect the civilians of Los Angeles. He was selfless— often thinking others first before himself. No man could replace Buck here—" Bobby said, voice strong, as he kept eye contact between the audience and the casket that lies behind him. "—We, we will miss his laughter, his cooking, his Joke.." Bobby wiped the tears that's starting to form at the corner of his eyes. "He was our Buck," Bobby finished. 

 

Then, Eddie came next. He stood there coldly— eyes. They were cold and glassy, like marbles left in the rain. His eyes are dull. Eddie Diaz cried out until there was nothing left to give. "Buck" He started. "Buck is my best friend— one of the best, he was there for Christopher and I when we needed him the most, but I wasn't there— when he needed me the most. Before all of this he actually proposed to me, so I guess that makes him my fiance. We both were so dumb,we didn't notice, and now all is too late." 

 

Buck wanted to say— no, he didn't want Eddie to be there because then— they'd be burying two firefighters. Two of Christopher's fathers. 

 

"Buck stood up, and acted as my son's other parent. Buck was my partner at work, we work best. We got each other's back. But not without hating each other first, which is pretty ironic. But right now.. " Eddie inhales deeply, looking back at the casket and leaving a faint fond smile "Right now I didn't do any of it. And I ask myself, what am I supposed to do now that he's gone. That I will never be able to give him the love he's been giving us. I don't know what I should do now." He gulped "But, I do know one thing— I'd never stop on loving him, that's— that's what I will do"

 

And maybe, that's what Buck will do too. 

 

Hen was next, She spoke up on how he thought buck as his careless little brother. And the bonds they made not just as coworkers but as a family.

 

Chimney Said his Good byes next, telling a story on how he mistaken buck as a frat boy but proved himself wrong. And that he treats him as a brother long before Maddie. And that he was thankful for all the years and for trusting him with Maddie.

 

Maddie said her goodbyes next, on how he loved him as her own, and he's been the reason why he fought Doug and ran away, and that she will never regret that he came to their life. “Go say Hi to Daniel for me my little Brother” Maddie Finished. 

---

Evan Buckley watched as the Casket was carried outside, the 118 carrying him— still as gently as they were. The truck in front of them was waiting. Flags drawn on a half-mist,  and each corner are decorated with flowers.

 

As the casket was carefully placed at the rig, Chimney passed the turnout and helmet to Eddie— who gently hooked it and fixed the name— Buckley showed the most sickening way one could imagine. 

 

The 118 stood straight, at Bobby's count they all saluted, as Eddie rang the bell once, twice, thrice. 

 

"Firefighter Evan Buckley, your duty is done, you may now rest in peace, Thank you for your service"

 

He saw as the flag draped over his red casket was folded up, carried carefully as they marched towards Maddie, her hand reaching for the flag. She placed the flag on her chest and closed her eyes as her head bowed down to the flag. 

 

Evan Buckley watched as his casket was lowered into the ground, a cascade of forget-me-nots following after it. 

 

He didn't remember asking for it but still.

 

Soon it was time for the flowers to rain at his grave before the ground separates him from his family.

 

He saw Maddie kiss hers before letting it fall.

Athena gently rubbed her husband’s back as they released their flowers together.

 

Chim and Hen followed.

 

And finally, Eddie.

Eddie threw his flower last — because he knew Buck would always… always go home to him..

 

Eddie was right.

 

----

Buck followed Eddie until he went home— exhausted. Christopher was dropped off at Hen because— they said Eddie needed a break. Which in fact he does. 

 

Buck approached Eddie placing his hands at his shoulders, Eddie didn't flinch, Eddie banged his hand on the table and stood up, passing right through at Buck. Eddie went straight to his room, and Buck heard the door lock. Now— he's not a power abuser, but to him locked doors are basically useless as well— he can pass through objects. 

 

As he passed through he saw Eddie folded in on himself, sitting on the floor with his knees clutched tight, his face hidden in the hollow between them— like the world had just caved in. He slowly approached it but before he could— Eddie instinctively grabbed the nearest vase and threw it at the wall, the vase going through his astral body. "Eddie!" Buck shouted as if he could hear him. 

 

"You left us" Eddie screamed as he trash his bed, Pillows are thrown everywhere "you left ME" Eddie emphasised as he threw the bedsheets. "Im mad you, my self, at everything" He kicked the desk, breaking the foot and sending it to the ground" 

 

"Eddie you have to stop please" Buck begged. As he approached Eddie and hugged him tight. He doesn't want Eddie hurting himself, blaming himself.

 

His body went through Eddie's. He looked back and hugged him tighter this time, As if it would make any difference– he went through Eddie again who is now sitting on the floor curled to himself– legs covering His face a                                                                                                                                                       s he sobbed uncontrollably 

 

he put whatever strength is left finally Eddie stopped. And Buck was shocked at himself. What just happened?

 

"Wha-" Eddie said— confused. Buck embraced Eddie even more tighter resting his head at Eddie's shoulders "Eddie" Buck slowly speaks up

 

"No- I'm hallucinating, whatever is this leave me alone.”  Eddie fought through his ghostly grip and looked behind him. Eddie's breathing is loud and uneven, his eyes wide open and his brows furrowed. 

 

Eddie slowly stepped back, his back hitting the wall behind him that had been littered with punch holes.

 

"Eddie, I'm real" Buck stated, He never realized that if he desired to do so, he could show up to and interact with the living world or be seen by Eddie to be exact.

 

"God, I'm losing my mind" Eddie breathes in uneven breaths. 

 

"I wish I could say, breathe with me— but you know.” He tries to lighten up the mood, Avoiding the elephant in the room “Breathe Eddie"  Buck said in calm motion, although he was still flabbergasted that Eddie is seeing him right now... 

 

"I don't know how you could see me— no one can until— well, now" He explained. 

 

"You— you've been here?" Eddie slowly approaches and tries to cup Buck's cheeks but to no avail— his hand passed through Buck's. 

 

He tries to touch Buck again but it didn't work hugging him but his arms passed through 

 

"Since the beginning" He smiled, leaving a smile and kissing Eddie's forehead— although not in contact, Eddie felt Buck— unlike any other ghosts, Buck is warm. 

 

"I didn't tell you, how much I-" Buck shushed Eddie, placing his index finger at, his mouth "I know, I heard everything" 

 

"Let's get this room fixed up" Cheered Buck placing his hand to his chin as he paced the room scanning for the damage Eddie had done.

 

“I'm the guy that likes fixing things” A voice echoed in Eddie's ear, much of a whisper.

 

swiftly and quickly Eddie had managed to temporarily fix the room, it isn't perfect but would do just fine. The bed formerly trashed is now neat and clean ready to be laid down.

 

Buck approached Eddie and put his ghostly face close enough for Eddie to slightly pull his head back beside him "Bed, now" 

 

Eddie looked at him and blinked slowly  "what if I wake up and you're gone?"

 

"I won't, I promise, I'll be here when you wake up," Buck said as he placed a gentle kiss on Eddie's forehead. 

 

Eddie laid down, a space being obviously left for Buck to sit on Eddie gives up to the darkness and falls into slumber. As Buck watches Eddie sleep which he argues Eddie needed after the toll of events that just happened.  

 

Buck sat to the bed next to Eddie and watched as the man peacefully slept. He buried his hands back and forth on Eddie's soft hair. He gently lowered his head and placed a kiss on his forehead again before leaving the room, passing through the walls.

 

And soon, he is outside Eddie's house. He wandered at the dead of the night he kept on walking and walking without a destination on his mind. Then, he found himself in front of Bobby Nash's and Athena’s house. 

 

He casually walks inside— no one's gonna see him anyways, there– he found Bobby Nash staring at a framed picture. It was the Party from where they held his recertification party after a long recovery after being crushed by a firetruck, Him and Eddie were hugging each other tight smiles painted their whole faces. Bobby grabbed the frame and gently wiped off the dust that collected overtime then, Bobby placed the frame back on its place and smiled. He remembered May taking the photo. Although the events later on soon turned into a disaster when he pulled a pulmonary embolism regardless, It was a great night and they did have fun. 

 

Bobby walked towards the sofa and slowly sat down. "Im sorry so kid" Bobby said between as his hands went to his face, Bobby let his head rest on the wall.

 

Buck wants to comfort Bobby by any means, so even if he has no proof that this will work the same way it did to Eddie he still tried.

 

He sat on Bobby's right side, gently laid his hand on his shoulder and released a unique kind of warmth. But his presence was unnoticed– it didn't work. 

 

He sighs. But he still stayed wanting to confirm that Bobby would be fine.

 

Then, Athena arrived, his hand holding a hot coffee "Honey-" She said as she slowly approached Bobby, sitting on Bobby's left and putting the coffee on the table "Don't push yourself too much, he wouldn't like it" Athena said– her hand stroking Bobby's back.

 

"That's true pops," Buck said worryingly. 

 

"If we had tried enough on the scene, we could've actually brought him back, It's all my fault I let one of my kids died again”

 

"No" Both Buck and Athena said in unison

 

“Honey” comforted Athena as he gently raised her other hand to his husband's cheek to guide him to her eye.

 

.

 

"There was nothing you can do," Athena said, placing a kiss at her husband's lips. 

 

"Then why does it feels like it"

 

"Because you love that boy, you'd do anything for Buck. So why don't you fix yourself up, because if Buck were here right now, he'd be scolding you" Athena and Bobby both shared a laugh. 

 

"I love you Bobby, Athena," Buck said, embracing both of them, but neither Bobby nor Athena flinched. 

 

"Everything your wife is saying is true, I don't want you sulking over my death, Bobby" Buck stood up and walked away. Looking back again, both Athena and Bobby are curled around each other.

 

Buck released a fond smile, his face softening. He continued on walking satisfied that Bobby and Athena had each other to support through these hard times. 

 

..

 

Next, he went to Chim and Maddie's. He saw Chimney hug Maddie tightly, as she embraced the folded flag. "I miss him already," Maddie said. 

 

"Me too" replied Chim

 

Buck feels guilty leaving his family behind, he hates that he died. 

 

"I lost another brother," Chim started, "I should've done more at the scene, should've tried harder. 

 

"Chim" Maddie looked up at chimney– their eyes meeting.  

 

"I'm sorry Maddie" Chimney said in sobs.  

 

Watching his family mourn him feels like thousands of knives stabbing him deep within his skin, being twisted left and right. 

 

---

After Buck left Maddie's house, he kept on walking, taking a glance at the beach, at the place where he almost lost his leg, at the scene where the well collapsed and he thought he lost Eddie, at the street where he first tasted the blood of his best friend, at the scene where he died first, but came back shortly after. 

 

The places with both good and bad memories etched in Buck’s mind. He visited each place that's significant to his growth. Taking memories as he reminisces about the good and bad ones. Regardless of the memory, if it's traumatizing it makes Buck whole, it makes him– Buck.

 

He didn't notice the sun coming up. He returned to their home. 

---

Eddie opened his eyes, Buck was there to greet him "Good morning" Buck said smiling. His face is an inch closer to Eddie’s.

 

"I'd like to cook for you but" he gestures 

 

"Damn, I thought I was hallucinating yesterday, guess not." Eddie said his face was unimpressed. 

 

"Huh?!" Buck replied in offense. Moving away from Eddie. 

 

"Kidding, Buck," Eddie laughed. As he stood up and fixed his bed. While Buck watched at the back.

 

---

 

Even if he is a ghost, and only Eddie can see him, he is still treated as if he's a living being. Eddie kept preparing three plates which Christopher surprisingly doesn't question.  Eddie kept the other side of the Bed empty even though Buck can't fall asleep.

 

Eddie plays his favorite music 

 

Eddie kept his clothes at the closet 

 

Eddie kept his shampoo bottles and phone charged 

 

The 118 doesn't say anything when it comes to the firehouse, Eddie kept his lockers clean and the side of the truck empty for him to sit. Even if he often gets side eyes for everything– they know nothing.

 

they don't know that He is still there.  

 

Sitting at the chairs

 

listening at the music

 

laying in bed 

 

looking at his Phone 

 

Going to the firehouse and sitting beside Eddie 

 

For months it had become their tradition and no one could stop them.

 

But the month of December has come and Buck is still here, he has accomplished her business of spending more time with his family. There were times where he visits Bobby and Athena to go check on them if thier doing okay.  He goes to Maddie and Chim every Fridays his altar often having his favorite chilli paste he smiles as his panthom. hand brushed through the jars.

 

He knows their doing well and that satisfies him enough but the light that once showed at the scene of his death has yet to take him again. 

 

- - 

 

The Christmas decorations are up. The tree is all lit, and a few gifts are placed underneath. The tables and chairs are draped in Christmas-patterned cloths, red and green filling the room with warmth. Eddie can be seen fixing the lights, focused but quiet.

 

“Hey, can I, uhh… ask something?” Buck said, watching Eddie pick up a box of decorations.

 

“Sure,” Eddie replied, waving absently at him.

 

“Why am I still here?” Buck asked. His tone is low, staring Eddie dead at his eyes.

 

“I don’t know, Buck. Ask yourself—why haven’t you moved on?” Eddie said sarcastically, avoiding his eyes.

 

“I know you know,” Buck said, voice rising, “because my soul is literally tethered to you. Why, Eddie? Why couldn’t you let me move on—or maybe the right question is, why haven’t you?” The lights in the room flickered as his voice echoed.

 

“Because you died, Buck!” Eddie shouted back, pointing a trembling finger at Buck’s chest. Damn, He thought they were over with the anger phase but guess not.

 

“Because you left me when I had so many things I still wanted to tell you.” Eddie added, his hand going through his hair as he paced the room uncontrollably 

 

“You can tell me now,” Buck said softly. His hand hovered in the air, as if reaching for Eddie’s. “Can we dance—one last time? Even if we can’t touch?”

 

Eddie stopped pacing and nodded faintly and lifted his hand, holding it in the air as though Buck were really there. Buck smiled and placed his other hand on Eddie’s shoulder. The melody playing softly from the radio filled the silence.

 

Heart beats fast

Colors and promises

How to be brave?

How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?

But watching you stand alone

All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

I have died every day waiting for you

Darling, don't be afraid

I have loved you for a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more

 

They danced slowly, left and right as they swayed. Both danced— not minding the walls— or soils or time that had kept them apart. "Tell me everything" Buck said slowly as Eddie rested his head on his shoulder. The Phantom body he has brought Eddie warmth "I love you so much, I was so mad that you left me but in the end it was because I’m afraid to live without you. When I saw you lying at those cold tiles at the bank, I froze. Refusing to believe the sight before me. Wishing it was all just a nightmare. But it was that moment I also realized, I should've told you I should've made you feel you're loved sooner. Because tomorrow is promised to no one. "

 

"I know Eddie,I know I was loved by you all this time. The moment you came into my life, I already know,” Buck said calmly, voice is soathing and caring. 

 

"Close your eyes Mi amor." Buck said, raising his hands to cup Eddie's cheek to wipe his tears. Buck’s hand went through the teardrop on the corner of Eddie's eye so using his other hand, he guided Eddie's hand to his own face.

 

"I don't want you gone" Eddie said, his hand also raised to cup Buck’s cheek. 

 

He looked up at Eddie's hand going over his "I'm already gone Eddie, but there—" Buck looked at Eddie who was avoiding his gaze– pointed at his chest "— there I know I won't be" Buck smiled at Eddie, one last time.. 

 

Eddie closes his eyes, the warmth that envelopes his body slowly disintegrated, leaving only the cold wind. As he opened his eyes, there was nothing in front of him. 

 

"Buck?" 

 

Notes:

I hope you liked the story I spent my last life for this /j

please do leave a kudos as it would motivate me more so that I can make them suffer more also, Have you guys seen the promo for 9x13 thats-

insane.

This fic was NOT beta read by anyone. It was beta read by me which is..... Not helpful at all.
So mistakes are mine.

anywaysssss thank you for reading this, lmk what you think.