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Roonil Wazlib and The Three Cults
2,935,764 views • May 12th, 2015 👍 134k 👎 5.6k
The Seer
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Transcript:
Hello, again, my dear viewers. Once again, it is me, Sybill Trelawney, the great investigative journalist, here to uncover the truth.
I’ll start my story where it began: months ago. While on Twitter, I saw the internet explode over something called the Cultys. The entire concept of it sounded beyond my grasp. Seriously, an award show for cults? The idea is preposterous! Nonetheless, I watched it, and admittedly, I found it amusing and entertaining. However, the entire time, one key thing kept bothering me: Roonil Wazlib. Looking at him caused a persistent feeling of deja vu. I have never seen him before in my life - of that, I was sure, but somehow, something about him felt so familiar. This launched a personal investigation that has engulfed my life for the past several months.
I didn’t know where to start. Available information about the Cultys was lacking. All I knew was the basic things: It's an award show for cults, Roonil Wazlib -which is obviously a fake name- is the host, this is its 5th year as it started in 2010, and it has been very popular this year. I couldn't find any other information that could help me pinpoint more about Roonil Wazlib. Or so I thought.
That's when I noticed, the Cultys's creast looks suspiciously like the logo of Hogwarts University, where I graduated from.
This must mean that the Cultys is somehow affiliated with Hogwarts University. But how?
After looking through the schools website, I managed to find a database of dissertations and thesis statements that previous students have written to graduate. Luckily, as a former student, I was able to access it. So, I filtered it, looking just through the ones from 2010 and for majors most likely to write something cult related. One of them in particular caught my attention. It was about cults. Not only did it specifically mention the Cultys, the author even went as far to say that he designed the Cultys as a way to gain more information about cults through further interaction with them and their leaders.
So naturally, I dug up more information about the author. Simply looking at a picture of him revealed without a doubt that it was none other than Roonil Wazlib, the host.
However, that's not the end of the story. Yes, I may have managed to find the reason the Cultys was started in the first place, as well as Roonil Wazlib's true identity -which, out of a genuine respect for his privacy, I will not be sharing-, however, I still haven't came across the true reason I was even investigating it in the first place. I do not know what about Roonil Wazlib brought up memories that were out of my reach. Additionally, I haven't figured out why the awards show continued to happen year after year when it was only for a thesis. Granted, that is a matter that I'm significantly less interested in. Partly because I suspect the reason for the Cultys continued existence is the same reason as all dull things in life: money. Anyway, back to the matter at hand and what is actually interesting.
Researching Roonil Wazlib turned out to actually be quite boring. All the information I gathered painted the picture of an average young man recently out of college. A mostly clean criminal record, roommates -which are expected of someone his age-, no major health problems. You get the gist. The only thing of note was his involvement in the Cultys. Which is, frankly surprising, because to dream up something so ridiculous and insane for a thesis and then to stick with it for years afterwards, does not fit with the picture being painted. Granted, basic information and PII does not show the soul or true nature of an individual. I was sure that there must be something more to him, something bizarre and extraordinary. However, other than outright stalking, there would be no way for me to identify or get information on his personality, or whatever that bizzare something is.
So naturally, I turned my attention to researching his family members instead.
Immediate family members were obviously the ones I started with. He had no siblings, but his parents were still alive, and were also the ones to have raised him, so I started with them first. I was very grateful for this, as it turns out that the parents were in fact the key as to why Roonil looked so familiar in the first place. I recognized his father -whom Roonil is practically a mirror image of, sans the eyes which he got from his mother- and his mother. And while they may be older now than when I saw them, I still immediately recognized them and realized where I knew them from: another investigation I did about two decades ago.
At the time I was investigating the -at the time- recent changes in Dumbledore's cult. The cult had rebranded and the culture of the cult changed immensely within a short couple of years. The focus on Dumbledore waned, which was evident by the change of name from Dumbledore's Army to The Order of the Phoenix. Of course, that's not to say that the hero worship of Dumbledore vanished, or even lessened; it just became more convert, now the subtext to every interaction, rather than the interaction itself. If anything, I would argue that it instilled the idolization of Dumbledore into his cult's eyes even stronger, managing to wiggle its way into every thought and decision.
Regardless, Roonil's parents were part of the cult, but leaving at the time of my investigation. My interviews with them were a valuable source of information at the time as they were more open to sharing info than those still in the cult. This is also why I was able to recognize Roonil and his parent's. I interviewed them; they even brought baby Roonil to these interviews because they were clingy and refused to let him out of their sight. And yes, we had multiple interviews. I honestly believe that they viewed our interviews as free therapy. I didn't really mind, though, as that just meant they were giving me more free information.
Considering the line up of the change in focus of the ideology of the cult and Roonil's parents leaving the cult, you might assume that they left because of the change, that they did not like nor appreciate the new culture.
That, is in fact, wrong. They were ecstatic about the changes. These changes were brought on by Dumbledore announcing a "prophecy" that a Chosen One was about to be born, a child that would be able to defeat Lord Voldemort once and for all. Now, Lord Voldemort was supposed to be the personification of all bad and evil -much like the devil to Christians- which is a reasonable figure to have considering the cult's ideology emphasizing "staying on the light path", "not going dark", "finding light in the darkest of times", and other philosophical bullshit that sounds straight from a horoscope. Roonil's parents found this very exciting, as they believed that this Chosen One would help all of them achieve "accordance with the light path" and expansion of the cult, no matter if the "prophecy" meant that the "Chosen one" was going to physically fight and prevail over the "evil" Lord Voldemort, or if it was a more metaphorical sense of defeat, as in to be able to resist the Lord Voldemort and guide others onto the "light path" as well. Either way, Roonil's parents, along with the rest of the cult were eager to accept the "prophesied messiah figure".
One day, Dumbledore insisted that he watch one year old Roonil Wazlib -without his parents- for a couple of hours. Complacent as ever, the couple did as they were bid without question. When they came back, Dumbledore informed them that he did some rituals on Roonil and it concluded that Roonil was the Chosen One, the mysterious Messiah figure. The child also had something new that he was not in possession of before the time with Dumbledore: a scar on his forehead, in the shape of a lightning bolt. Dumbledore claimed that this was a result of the rituals and proof of Roonil's status as the Chosen One, rather than it just being a case of Dumbledore carving into a one year old child's forehead.
Roonil's parents were overjoyed at this. They thought that this was one of the best things that could have happened to them, and they told me as such. They genuinely believed with their whole heart that the scar was proof that Roonil was the Chosen One. When I asked if they noticed any bloody knives in their house (because that's where Dumbledore did it: in their own house, and they weren't allowed to even be in their home, much less in the room where it happened, while the "ritual" was being preformed), they maintained that it was used for the ritual -confirming, without their notice, that there was a bloody knife left by Dumbledore-, which obviously wasn't just an episode of carving shapes into a baby.
So, if (briefly) being kicked out of their own home, having rituals preformed on their one year old baby without their consent or knowledge, harm being brought to their baby, and Roonil being forced into a Messiah figure to the cult wasn't enough to make them leave, then what would be? Well, apparently part of being the Chosen One includes not being able to be raised by your own parents. Dumbledore not only said that Roonil had to be raised by his maternal aunt, but that they would not be allowed to visit their child, or even for Roonil to know that his parents were alive till after he defeated Lord Voldemort. Instead he was to be told that his parents had been murdered by Lord Voldemort, as a way to motivate Roonil to defeat him. Despite the fact that one of the cult's teachings was to not give into vengeance, and instead give people a second chance. Cause apparently this teaching only applies when Dumbledore wants it to apply.
This, was the one thing that Roonil's parents could not stand. So, they left. They confided in me that they still believed in most of the cult's doctrine (read: everything except that Dumbledore is a wise, all knowing figure. They lost all faith in him after he tried to take Roonil away from them), and wholeheartedly thought Roonil was the Chosen One destined to save us all by defeating Lord Voldemort. They just disagreed that Roonil being raised by his aunt and gaslighted to believe that his parents were murdered, when they were still alive, was the best course of action to prepare him for "his fate". They planned to teach him the spirit of the cult's ideology, but removing the parts about Lord Voldemort, Dumbledore, and Roonil being the Chosen One. These exclusions were made because because they thought that these three pieces of information would end up leading him back to The Order of the Phoenix. Part of there reluctance was because they thought it would be dangerous for Roonil to return to the cult because if Dumbledore's idea of preparation included turning his whole life into a lie, who knows what else it could include. The other part was because the couple had became very very clingy to him after they were threatened to have their precious child taken away from them. They brought Roonil to .Every. Single. Interview. He even started calling me Lawney! His presence wasn't even in a "Okay, Roonil, Mummy and Daddy can't find you a baby sitter, so you should quietly play on the floor while Mummy and Daddy talk to Lawney." No! His parents would insist that he sit on their lap, and play there. They were always trying to touch him. I heard that after the Dumbledore incident, they even started moving him back to sleeping in their room -they originally moved him to his own room to sleep at 6 months old, they only went back because they were traumatized! Well, they did say that Roonil was also having nightmares. I asked Roonil about his nightmares, and he would mumble something about a beard, a knife, pain, his forehead, and Mummy and Daddy not being there, so perhaps it was for all 3 of them that they returned to the same room despite there being space for Roonil to have his own room.
For the child's sake, I really hope that the parents lost some of that clinginess.
I am pretty confident that Roonil doesn't know anything about Dumbledore or his Chosen One status, as his parents seemed very reluctant to tell him, even when asked about informing him in the future when Roonil was older. Granted, they may have changed their minds years later, but considering how Roonil acts around Dumbledore, and that he is even able to be in within a mile of Dumbledore without vomiting, I feel confident that he doesn't know. In fact, he may even be finding it out from this very video. However, does Dumbledore or The Order of the Phoenix recognize Roonil? Truthfully, I do not know. On the one hand, I am inclined to believe yes, because the lightning bolt scar is very distinctive, and Roonil share's his likeness so much with his father. But, it also doesn't seem that Dumbledore or his cult is acting on any recognition, which would indicate that the recognition is not there in the first place. However, that could also just mean that they believe Roonil is on track to defeating Lord Voldemort without their interference and they would like to keep it that way. Overall, the results are inconclusive. But, just in case, I am keeping this investigation report strictly to YouTube, rather than printing it like usual (however a transcript will be put in the description for those that prefer to read). Most of the cult is of the older generations, so I believe that they will not be able to find this video, and therefore not gain any information on him that they did not already know, which should keep Roonil safe from them. Or rather, in no more danger from The Order of the Pheonix than he was before.
But, The Order of the Phoenix isn't the only cult to have a reason to be interested in Roonil. As some of you might have noticed, Lord Voldemort, the one Roonil was "prophesied" to be able to defeat, is actually the god that the Death Eaters -led by Tom- worship. This is part of the reason why there is so much conflict between The Order of the Pheonix and The Death Eaters in the first place: because The Order of the Phoenix demonizes the one that The Death Eaters worship -as if he needs any more help being demonized, after all, I think just his appearance does that.
Now, I do not know whether the Death Eaters would even give this "prophecy" any credibility, or if they simply believe it was dreamed up by Dumbledore to give his Cult faith and to scare the Death Eaters. Or, if they believe the prophecy, they might not believe that it is Roonil Wazlib that has the ability to defeat Lord Voldemort. Instead, they might believe that Roonil was a fake created by Dumbledore as a diversion tactic so they would go after him rather than the real Chosen One. It is possible that they are considering it, as Tom Riddle does seem quite interested in Roonil, and we would have no idea if Tom was dating Roonil simply as a means to assess his threat level and his possible weaknesses that could stop him from defeating their Lord. Alternatively, this relationship could be more of a partnership: perhaps the Death Eats (specifically Tom) has offered Roonil protection from The Order of the Phoenix as long as Roonil does not try to defeat Lord Voldemort.Of course, this is assuming that the Death Eaters even know about the prophecy, which is not a forgone conclusion.
Since we are on the topic of Tom courting Roonil, I believe it is appropriate to talk about how it could be considered a fulfillment of the prophecy, if it were to be real and true. Since Tom is the leader of The Death Eaters, if Roonil were to influence him -either accidentally, or on purpose- in a way that would divorce his beliefs from Lord Voldemort's teachings to an extent, than the cult's values could shift in a way that would lessen Lord Voldemort's influence and control over the people of this world, which could be considered as defeating him in spirit. Alternatively, some people suggest that in Tom's videos with Lord Voldemort, that Lord Voldemort is actually Tom. If this is true, than it could be fraud -but could mean that he is the "Lord Voldemort" the prophecy is referring to- or that Tom is the physical representation/reincarnation of Lord Voldemort in this world. Either way, the prophecy could be fulfilled by Roonil defeating him with "the power of love" that Dumbledore likes to preach about in his cult doctrine.
Now, if you think that having two cults -The Order of the Phoenix and The Death Eaters (I'm only including ones that have a personal interest in him, and not ones related to him through an award show, because that would make the number much higher, but also less meaningful)- revolving around Roonil is more than enough, than I would agree with you. But sadly, it seems that there is possibly another cult that has their sights set on Roonil. And that, would be The Cultys.
At first, I was hesitant to believe that the Cultys was a cult in the first place, especially when paired with the fact that half the internet believed that Roonil was the cult leader -a belief popularized by the fake journalist, Rita Skeeter, who puts more importance on views, a big story, and popularity than she does on facts or the truth-, while the other half is convinced that he is the victim of the cult and needs to be saved. However, I decided to look into it nonetheless.
The first one seemed even more absurd the more I looked into it. We've all seen how awkward Roonil looks on stage. While he is funny and relatable, I do not see him as having the charisma to form a cult, much less lead one unless other people practically threw him in that position, which would be a situation that I would consider leaning more towards being a victim forced into this. And even if he did surprise me, and did have the charisma and capabilities of being a cult leader, I suspect that he would not want to, considering how his facial expression and tweets lean more into the feeling that he doesn't want to be where he is or doing what he is doing. He seems more like he would prefer for the whole show to just flop so he can be free.
But, the more that I looked into it, the more likely it seemed that not only was the Cultys a cult, but that Roonil was one of their biggest victims: their puppet.
There are typical things that all #FreeRoonil advocates use as support for their claims mostly amount what I said earlier: Roonil's aura screaming "I don't want to be here! Free Me!". Ironically, though, it's actually something that is commonly used by the "Roonil is the cult leader" argument that lead me to the most evidence of Roonil being the victim: the #FreeRoonil merch. Something was odd about the timing of the merch: Roonil was absent from Twitter for days. For the last several months, Roonil has done at least one, if not multiple tweets a day to drive engagement, so the sudden disappearance along with the just as sudden reappearance doesn't add up. Additionally, when doing merch about him, you would think, if anything, that Roonil would actually be more active to increase profits, rather than the opposite. Additionally, Tom Riddle kept drawing attention to Roonil's absence and kept referring to the #FreeRoonil movement. While it could be just a bid to draw the attention, as more attention to the Cultys increases the attention and therefore profit and followers of the Death Eaters. However, Tom seemed to have genuine concern for Roonil's absence in a way I do not believe could be faked. This means that Roonil has neither contacted him, nor gave him a previous reason strong enough to believe that his absolute absence would be expected.
Now, you may just say "Oh, well that's because he was too busy signing all of those photos". Which first off, you would still think that he would at least send a tweet about how he's signing all of this merch, to both draw awareness, and to explain his absence. But the second, and more pressing argument to that, is the signature itself.
The signature is very similar across all the photos -but not identical, meaning that it wasn't just digitally added and printed on- which indicates that it was all signed by the same person. But that doesn't necessarily mean that it's Roonil. In fact, I checked it against Roonil's actual signature ,you know, the one for his real, legal name. In the Roon. Wazlib signature, the spaces in the a's and o's are very small, practically non-existent. In Roonil's real signature, the a and the o have a much bigger space in the middle. That was not Roonil's writing. Roonil was not the one to sign those picture. Someone else did; someone else used his identity.
So, why didn't they have Roonil do the signatures? Well, either he refused to, or what I consider more likely: he tried to run away. Like parents, like son, after all. Only, he failed. The cult got him back a couple days later, but it wasn't quick enough to use him for the creation of the merch.
Additionally, during this time period, Roon Wazlib was signed up for a free trial of Netflix. This was likely to cement his fake identity as being "real". However, considering Roonil's absence, it is doubtful that it would be him signing himself up. For starters, if he was running away, then I'm sure he would have much bigger things on his mind than Netflix. Even if he was, I would doubt he would use the name Roonil. If you were running away from a cult, you wouldn't want to use the name that the cult associates with you anywhere else because that could make it easier for them to find you. If he did sign himsrlf up for Netflix free trial while on the run, he would most likely use either his real name, or even another fake name that the Cultys does noy associate him with. And even if he wasn't running away, I still see no reason why he would use the name Roonil Waslib rather than his real name. Regardless, it must of been someone else that signed up Roon Wazlib for a Netflix free trial.
However, a Netflix free trial requires you to put in a credit or debit card number so you don't just keep getting multiple free trials and watching Netflix that way without ever paying.
The credit card used for the Netflix free trial was Roonil's.
It was unlikely Roonil, so who did it? Who do you let know your credit card information? Pretty much just your spouse (sometimes not even them) and possibly your kids if they're old and mature enough. Roonil doesn't have kids. He does have his boyfriend, Tom Riddle, but since they don't live together, nor share finances, I doubt they have shared credit card information. And even if Tom did have Roonil's credit card information, what would be his reason to use Roonil's card to get a free trial of Netflix under Roonil's name? Probably not for his own use: Roonil would either find out and cancel it if Tom didn't get prior permission, and at that point there would be no reason to not put it under his own name, or Roonil's real name. So as a way to cement Roonil as a real identity? What would he gain from that? Attention or more publicity? Doubtful; every one with a lick of common sense has probably already guess that Roonil Wazlib is a fake name. Besides, he seemed genuinely concerned with Roonil's brief disappearance, so he wouldn't be worrying about Netflix of all things. Even if the concern was just staged (I don't think it was, but even if it was) then that would just be even less reason to set up the Netflix account free trial as it would be conflicting with the current narrative Tom was promoting: that Roonil was missing and in danger from the Cutlys.
So who actually would have a reason to open up a Netflix account free trial under Roonil's name, while Roonil was missing? The Cultys cult. They were already leaning into the #FreeRoonil thing for merchandising, popularity, and money. They were even willing to commit minor identity theft to forge his signature and sell it (although, I guess they couldn't be criminally charged for that because Roonil Wazlib isn't his real identity). This could actually be something that the Cultys could use to draw more attention (and therefore money) to themselves.
So that means, the Cultys cult must have Roonil's credit card information.
They're using him as a cash cow.
Additionally, I managed to even get ahold of more of his banking information (through connections I have as the Daily Prophet's best investigative journalist), and it has showed that he has not got any extra money from the merchandise using his face, despite that they got 10,000 American dollars from it in just the first couple of days, and profits have only grown since then. However, when checking the bank accounts of some of the other members of the Cultys, some of them have got large chunks of money in times that coincide enough to make it clear it was from the sell of merchandise. The largest chunk was in the bank account of a member who's handwriting (on their signature) matches up suspiciously well with the handwriting in the Roon Wazlib signatures on those autographs they sold.
Speaking of finances, another reason I'm so sure that Roonil is not the cult leader (besides the fact that he would have gotten more money for the merchandise the Cultys sold that had his face on it), is because he loves in a small flat with flatmates. If he was a cult leader, surely he would either live by himself or with his boyfriend of multiple years.
Oh wait. His roommates are all part of the Cultys cult. Oh, well, Roonil did originally start the Cultys for his thesis -even if it quickly got out of his control and started victimizing him instead-, he's probably just living with them because they're friends. Or because they're his jailers and making sure that he doesn't run away, try to tell anyone the truth about the cult, or do anything else that could ruin their reputation and therefore drain them of money.
Overall, I'm sure that the Cultys has turned into a cult, and that Roonil is a victim of the cult who is being held hostage as a cash cow. And as time goes on, we'll probably just get more information to prove it.
Roonil's parents may have left their cult to keep him out of one, but no matter how hard they tried, it seems that Roonil was destined to be engulfed by cults. On one side he has The Order of the Phoenix, on the other, he has The Death Eaters, and the Cultys is surrounding him on all sides. I've tried to unfog his future as much as I could, but with 3 cults around him, obsessing over him, and a prophecy that some of them may believe is true, it's too fuzzy to tell, too many variables, and too many deciding factors that include non-logical people. I suppose we'll just have to wait and see and wish Roonil the best. #FreeRoonil
This is Sybill Trelawny of the Daily Prophet, signing off.
