Work Text:
“I can’t believe I’m doing this-”
“We, are doing this.” Dazai corrected shuffling around the area of the office he was in.
Kunikida was hovering over Dazai, arms crossed across his chest in a defensive position. Foraging Birth Certificates was not how he wanted, or how he had planned for his day off to go.
He especially didn’t know how to feel about Dazai knowing how to make such a document , even more that Fukuzawa had allowed Dazai as well as Ranpo to do such a thing.. It was against the law. Something they stood to uphold.
Kunikida and Dazai were sitting in the main office. Hovering over a printer that Ranpo had brought in that morning. Yosano had taken Atsushi with to her dorm so he wouldn’t be left at the office alone for the night.
She still had an extra room in her dorm from when she had housed Kenji temporarily when he had started working at the Agency a few summers ago. He had been learning to adjust to city life, and who else could teach him but a city girl.
“I still don’t see why we couldn’t just go to the government’s office-“
“Because this boy will be taken back to whatever hell he had been, and he is evidence that we need.” Ranpo budded into Kunikida’s complaints. Staring almost into Kunikida’s soul.
“They will take him back then sooner or later if- no when, they figure out he has an ability, he could be killed, transported, or held by the government. This is the only logical way to keep our only clue for a bigger picture. He is important… I just know it.” Ranpo explained as Kunikida shifted behind Dazai, looking almost guilty.
“Ahhh yes, it’s perfect!” Dazai held up a paper to Ranpo, hand on his hip held with a cocky grin on his face.
Ranpo and Kunikida looked at the paper, it looked legitimate, scarily so to Kunikida at least. Though Ranpo just saw the imperfections of the forged certificate. Why they hadn’t used Kunikida’s notebook to produce such a document was a mystery to him. There couldn’t be any imperfection if they had done it that way, same with less time.
“The corners coloring is just slightly off-“ Ranpo went to speak, pointing to the top right corner of the document.
“If it’s a problem, fix it yourself, yeah?” Dazai's eyes darkened, holding a challenged threat. Though he did look to the spot Ranpo corrected with a small scowl.
“Yeah, no thanks.” Ranpo sighed and flopped his hand back down onto his lap and kicked his feet in annoyance. Even with his own desk chair, he chooses to just sit himself on the surface of the work space instead.
“Then you can just say, ‘Wow! Great job Dazai!’’” Dazai said with extreme sarcasm and extra enthusiasm than needed.
“It’s good enough.” Ranpo huffed shoving chocolate into his mouth as he spoke. That was as close to a compliment Dazai or anyone at the office other than Poe, a guest funny enough, could receive.
Kunikida couldn’t help but take the certificate and look at it in awe, he didn’t know what Ranpo had found wrong with such a paper, it looked like the real thing. Though Ranpo is never wrong, at the moment of inspecting the document even Kunikida questions it.
“This is amazing work Osamu.” Kunikida noted flipping the paper over and rubbing his thumb at it. Everything was perfect to the blonde, down to even the paper which itself even felt legitimate.
“It was nothing special!” Dazai grinned and smacked his husband's shoulder to try to cover up how his face had heated up at something that felt so stupid to feel embarrassed about. Considering how Dazai had stayed up all night and had even come to the office early, it had been a bigger struggle than he had wanted to let on.
“Right, let’s show this to the president.” Ranpo spoke, putting a candy in his mouth, pulling out an actual serious expression.
________
When Yosano had returned with Atsushi, she looked exhaustively drained and mildly frustrated. The kid wasn’t even looking as happy and curious as yesterday evening, his eyes puffy like he had just got done crying only minutes ago. Atsushi looked much more nervous and scared coming into the office today. He was clinging to Yosano while also trying to keep his distance from her at the exact same time.
“Hey Atsushi!” Dazai waved at the kid who darted over quickly to his side. That was interesting behavior. Especially since they knew Yosano would never hurt a kid. Kunikida looked at the tired women.
She walked over and took Kunikida’s shoulder, leading him over to the door where they had come from. “I believe it’s too early for him to live with you guys.” Yosano stated to the blonde right off the bat. No explanation, just straight to the point. Typical Yosano.
“Are you telling me he should live in the Agency building? He deserves an actual home after the hell he’s been through!”
“I understand your perspective Kunikida, but I really don’t believe he can handle it!” Yosano almost yelled in Kunikida's face. They hadn’t been talking long and it was already turning into a heated argument. Yosano was definitely tired if she was letting this become an argument.
“Well I won’t let him live in a flipping office building! Especially since not everyone has a schedule that can accommodate watching him every night!” Kunikida shot back at her, pulling out his book ‘Ideal’ and waving it like the word of God.
Leaving a kid in a giant building alone and with objects that could hurt him was not something he was keen or going to let happen.
“Why won’t you listen to me? Doppo, he is not mentally ready to be in a house! He panicked as soon as I got home last night, and he hid under my damned table crying in fear! Tell me that’s a kid who could handle living in a house! All I had was a dorm and he was terrified!” Yosano put her hands on her hips, her paternal instincts kicking in.
Yosano had no idea what had set the kid off. She had just opened the door to her dorm room, made a small comment about him making himself at home for the night, then he had just suddenly freaked out and hid under her table by her front door.
She had to drag the poor kid out this morning just to get to work! The kid hadn’t taken food from her that night or that morning, just curled up and cried. He had said words, the kid a mumbled word while he had been bawling his eyes out, though Yosano hadn’t been able to understand any of them.
“I’m sorry Yosano, but I can’t just leave him here-“ Kunikida held his book against his chest. Clearly leaving him wasn’t what you do in this situation. It’s clearly written in ‘Ideal’ to not leave a kid without a home or care from an adult.
It was written in ideal for a reason, he couldn’t just ditch it!
Yosano took a breath and grabbed Kunikida by his shoulders, her grip on him almost bruising. “I need you to think about the kid. Not about whatever you have written in your ideal.”
“I can’t do that and you damn well know that! Mind you my Ideal is made to help kids like him!” Kunikida squawked at the women’s statement. Don’t listen to his ideals? She was crazy! He had already changed his ideal for his husband, something that had taken a lot of consideration and research and help from Dazai and Fukuzawa, which he wasn’t planning to do again. He had his Ideals for a reason.
“Now, it's not too hard to solve a problem like this,” A taller woman had spoken with a soft grin. Pointing to her board with a wooden ruler with a light slam. She was a stricter teacher, one that many students never liked, but not one had ever failed her class. Which Kunikida had found so interesting. Miss is what everyone called her. Mostly because everyone was trying to be disrespectful, but she never seemed to care.
Why were the rules so important to her? He never understood why people followed rules like they could crush them if they weren’t followed to a T. Though he had a fascination with her in a way that could only be described as admiration.
She had her whole person neat and tidy. Never a stain or winkle on her clothes, No hair out of the bun she always had slicked up. Miss’s class was always put together and seemed to be arranged in a particular way.
“The square root of 15 x^2 y^9 is easy to solve if you look at it closely and follow the steps.” Kunikida followed her through the math carefully, noting the steps and rules for solving the equation.
Despite this being High School math, he was still only in 7th grade. The other students just seemed bored, just following with their eyes. They never seemed interested in taking notes.
Kunikida had always loved math, more than any subject. Extra credit? Done. A Test or quiz? Passed with an A. Always. Why? Because he loved math. He didn’t entirely care if it was important or required to learn. He just cared about what was fun. Like a normal kid.
“Staff and Students, we are going into a lockdown-” The school's speaker had crackled loudly, ringing as it suddenly shut off mid sentence. The speaker had always been a little scratchy and off to Kunikida. Though the teacher was up immediately ushering us into a corner, her expression was serious. Odd for a drill.
It was unlikely that this was a real lockdown. Shootings just didn’t happen here. It was only once a year that they would do lockdown drills. The school never needed to prioritize them. Kunikida’s teacher had been a teacher from America, coming here for who knows what reason.
She herself covered all the windows, blocked both the windows and the door to the classroom and flicked off the light. Leaving them in almost complete darkness/
“Miss, I think you're taking this a bit too seriously for a drill.” Kunikida had chuckled, elbowing one of his friends who started giggling loudly.
“I need all of you to be quiet now.” She spoke quietly but she had that tone. The tone that meant business. It got most of the whispering kids to hush almost immediately. Why was she so serious?
They had sat in the class for what had seemed like days. The teacher had passed out scissors and other sharp or blunt objects, hushing the kids who were asking her questions about what they were meant to do with such objects.
Suddenly they heard it. Gunshots rang through the hall outside. Then suddenly the door to their room was being banged and there was yelling. “Let me in please!” A girl had yelled out to the door. Kunikida made a stand to let the girl in.
He knew that girl after all. It was his best friend. Though the teacher pulled him back, shaking her head and pointing for him to sit down. “But I know who she is!” Kunikida whispered-yelled in haste to get his teacher to understand.
“No, I don't care if she's your mom, or your girlfriend, we will not be letting her in. Now sit down now.” She spoke, physically making Kunikida sit down. The banging just got harsher until it had just stopped…
It wasn’t long after until the police had shown up. Even then Miss didn’t open the door to them. She had them slide their badges under the door and told them she needed the principal's confirmation.
That ended up with them in the room longer. When the older women deemed it safe to unblock the doors and took a peak, once everything was confirmed. When It really was the police and principle. She opened the door completely and hushed the students again as they got rowdy in relief and a bit of concern.
The class were led out into the hall. Only a few classes were leaving the building. The building was quiet, too quiet. They turned down all the toward the cafeteria.
Bodies.
Children
Teachers…
Kunikida’s friends.
Blood. So much blood was covering the floors like dark splattered paint. Lunch hadn’t happened. Why were there bodies here in this hallway?
“Why… wasn’t everyone supposed to have been in the classrooms?”
Kunikida had looked to his teacher who was gently pushing the stragglers of the class who were trying to look at the gruesome sight or get to their friend's body.
“They didn’t follow the rules for the lockdown. Not like the rules will always protect you, but it definitely keeps you safer than not. Most of the time.”
“Are you saying they tried to run…”
“I am saying that, yes. They were unlucky that they had run into the person. We can’t track anyone in the building. So we shouldn’t run. Even if we think we can. The rules were put in place to keep us safe.”
Once they got outside, the sirens had finally registered in his ears. Loud, bright, and too much. Too much after everything that had just happened. Miss had led them to the far field of the school to police and other emergency vehicles and workers who were tending to a few injured.
This sorrow, this death, everything, is what happens if you don't follow the rules.
Kunikida knew this now. Rules. He needed rules. Or he would die just like they did. Just because they wouldn't follow rules. Which means, if he made rules for life, he wouldn’t have to worry….
Ideals.
He needed everything to be perfect. He needed Ideals.