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It was just the fourth day of their mission and Sasuke was already dreading it. He was worn out and he'd lost count of how many migraines he'd had since the mission began, and it didn't help that neither of them had gotten any sleep the past two days.
Sasuke thought he could stretch out another day, and maybe they could return to Konoha earlier, but Naruto began complaining and Sasuke couldn't bear the thought of having a migraine with Naruto whining in his ears at the same time. So, they decided to spend a few nights at a ryokan to rest.
He had just finished bathing, and was drying his hair when he'd heard a sound.
"Oh."
Sasuke wandered inside. "What?"
"There's only one futon," he added, "and it's not big. Like at all." Naruto rubbed the back of his neck. "Do you think we can ask for a different—"
"This is the only room that was available." Sasuke mumbled, eye slightly twitching.
"One of us is going to get the floor," Naruto said, glaring daggers at Sasuke.
Sasuke stared at him.
Naruto groaned, throwing his head back. "Fine, but you get the floor tomorrow!" He stumbled over towards the bed, grabbing a pillow and throwing it on the hard tatami mat.
"Whatever," Sasuke replied, folding the towel in his hands and putting it away.
Naruto grabbed the extra blanket, and threw it next to his pillow. He let out a long, sleepy sigh and began to massage his shoulders. "Man, I'm so tired."
Sasuke's gaze fell onto Naruto's—just for a moment, then it averted back to his futon.
"You can sleep here tonight."
Naruto blinked.
"Seems like you need it more." He explained.
Naruto raised his brows, then let out a laugh. "Oh, really?" He grinned at Sasuke, and then—he leaned in. "Is your heart finally softening up for me?" He teased, but his eyes held Sasuke's for just a second longer.
"I was being nice." Sasuke retorted.
"Yeah, but I'm fine. Plus, if I do end up wanting it… maybe I'll just slip in bed with you," he laughed, and fell back, resting his head on the pillow. "Thanks, anyway."
Sasuke narrowed his eyes but said nothing—instead, he reached for the lamp on the nightstand and pressed the switch.
The moonlight split across the floor, falling right onto Naruto's face with a hue of blue.
Sasuke laid awake, silently watching him despite the on-growing exhaustion because it was just something so obscure—something so incredibly enchanting about Naruto that he couldn't truly grasp.
He wondered whether it was his eyes—the simple doe shape of them—or was it the complex shades of his iris. Sasuke didn't know, but he couldn't say that he wasn't affected by them because he was. Obsessively so.
He wondered if it was the way Naruto talked—or behaved. If it was his witty way of talking, or if it was how quickly he can go from goofing around, to all seriousness. And how good he looked while doing it.
Sasuke knew of his feelings long before he ever dared to acknowledge them because somewhere in that dark place of his heart, he knew Naruto could never really belong to him. He couldn't really belong to anyone.
So, he turned his back towards the sight and hoped to get at least some amount of sleep.
Just when he was about to doze off, a blood curling scream erupted—not just anyone—it was Naruto's voice.
He quickly grabbed his kunai, ready to destroy whatever that dared to hurt his friend, but when he turned around, he almost threw up.
The metallic smell of blood hit him before anything else, it took over the air like a disease wanting to engulf whatever it could.
The room was dark, the moonlight was no longer there—instead, the moon was red—just like it was on the night of the massacre, and he moved before he could think twice.
He frantically searched for Naruto, trying to activate his sharingan which wasn't working.
His skin felt it before his eyes could see. He had slipped and fell on his hands and knees.
Then, he saw it. The pool of blood he was sitting in—and Naruto's body—Naruto's body was butchered. His limbs were detached. His eyes were gauged out of his eye sockets—oh, those beautiful blues.
Sasuke felt it then, the chakra that ran through Naruto was replaced by… nothing.
His lifeline was gone. He had no pulse.
Sasuke didn't even remember screaming.
"Sasuke!" Naruto's voice came out husky. "Thank god you're awake—"
Sasuke grabbed his arm with brute force.
Naruto winced, "Fuck!" he cursed. "Hey, hey, hey! It's okay." Naruto grabbed Sasuke's face with both of his hands. "Look—no—over here, Sasuke. Look at me."
A pause.
Then, Sasuke's gaze flickered to Naruto's.
"Yeah. Good. You're okay. You're all fine. That was just–"
Naruto was here.
Still calm.
Still alive.
Then, what the hell had that been?
"–a nightmare. It wasn't real—and there's definitely no blood."
Naruto's voice was like a melody to his ears. Low and rough.
His touch burned, but Sasuke couldn't seem to loosen his grasp—not when he almost lost Naruto again.
"Naruto—" Sasuke grabbed Naruto's hand that rested on his cheek with both of his hands, bringing it down to his heart.
"I know it was a bad dream, but I'm not going anywhere, okay?" Naruto reassured, rubbing circles on Sasuke's back with his other hand. "Come on, lay back down." He lowered Sasuke onto the futon, but Sasuke wouldn't let go of his hand.
And Naruto couldn't find it in himself to leave.
Mostly because Sasuke was still shaking.
Still holding onto Naruto like he was worth something.
"I'll get you some water," he said, pushing himself off the floor.
Sasuke didn't let go.
Naruto stared at him in defeat, and then he slumped back down.
A few moments passed.
Sasuke's chest rose and fell in time with even breaths. His eyes were closed, and he looked almost peaceful—like the fright from earlier had never been there—but it had been there because Sasuke was still wrapped around Naruto's arm, and it was obvious that he had no means of letting go.
In defeat, Naruto sighed and tapped Sasuke's arm. His eyes fluttered open, and stared back at him in a daze.
"Move over," he said, voice laced with drowsiness.
Slowly, Sasuke shifted until he was up against a wall.
Without another word, Naruto grabbed his own pillow and put it next to Sasuke's. He lowered himself until he was on his back and slipped underneath the covers, and it was only then that Sasuke had let go of his arm.
"Happy now?" Naruto asked as he threw an arm around Sasuke's torso.
"Shut up," he said, settling in-between Naruto's arms.
Naruto snorted. "At least you're back to your usual self, huh?"
A beat.
Then, almost too quietly:
"I thought I lost you."
Naruto glanced down at him.
Sasuke met his gaze, utterly exhausted yet he continued, "That time when I told you the nightmares had stopped—do you remember?"
"Yeah."
"It was true," he added. "The nightmares about my family had stopped—but then they changed, and instead of seeing my parents die over and over again—I was seeing you."
Naruto's lips pursed into a thin line, and he nodded. "They're just nightmares. They're not real. I wouldn't die so easily, and you should know that." He chuckled, pulling Sasuke close.
A breathy laugh escaped Sasuke's lips.
And just for a moment, he let himself be held by the only man he'd ever wanted. Even though, deep down, he knew that they couldn't be together—not in the way he wanted, at least.
But maybe he would be okay if Naruto held him like this everyday. So, he shifted until his head was against Naruto's chest.
And both of Naruto’s arms were wrapped around Sasuke’s torso—one of his hands rested on the back of Sasuke's head, while the other rested on his hip, low and possessive.
Sasuke tried his best to keep himself from going feral. He really tried.
Naruto just pulled him as close as he could before going, "You know what I just realized?"
"What?"
"I've never really cuddled anybody before. I mean like except you." He admitted casually.
An exhausted sigh escaped Sasuke's lips. "That was one time."
"Yeah, but you were being such an ass about it."
"You turned it into a big deal."
"Because it was a big deal!"
"It was an accident!"
"Liar. I saw the way you were ogling me," Naruto said, rolling his eyes.
"Pft." Sasuke let out a scoff. "I've never ogled you. What are you talking about?"
Naruto let out a bright laugh, fully expecting Sasuke to be playing with him.
Silence.
He paused, and then he sat up. "Wait, you're not kidding."
Sasuke had to hold himself from whining at the loss of touch. "No shit."
"But, you do it frequently." Naruto explained, rubbing the back of his neck. "I swear you're always giving me these looks whenever we're together—I mean, even Sakura was looking at you crazy!"
Sasuke sat up slowly, cheeks burning. "Sakura just looks like that."
"What the hell does that mean?"
"That she's always giving me judgmental looks."
"Uh. Yeah because you're always up to the craziest things?" Naruto questioned, tilting his head. "Wait. Hold on. Back to the topic—do you seriously not know?"
Sasuke hesitated, just for a brief moment before shaking his head.
Immediately, Naruto paused — grin spreading wide on his face. "Dude. I can tell by your face that you know what I mean."
"I don't know what you're talking about—"
Naruto laughed, loud and bright. "Man, you've got to be kidding me."
Sasuke deadpanned, the tips of his ears turning red. "Whatever."
"Not only were you lying—you were terrible at it." He leaned back, still chuckling. "But, why?"
Sasuke met his eyes. "Why, what?"
"Why do you do that? I mean, why do you stare at me like that?" Naruto asked straightening up, genuinely curious.
Sasuke's eye twitched.
He thought of making up some lame excuse, but then he saw how Naruto was waiting for an answer.
And he remembered how good Naruto had been to him.
So, he decided to tell the truth—not because he wanted to—but because Naruto deserved it.
"Because I like looking at you."
The smile on Naruto's face froze. "Oh?"
"I like being near you because you understand me." Sasuke explained further. "I like looking at you because you deserve to be looked at. You deserve to be noticed, and you deserve to be appreciated, but — more than anything, you deserve to be loved."
Naruto's mouth opened.
Then, finally:
"And I love you," he said. Sasuke's eyes moved to Naruto's mouth. "I will always love you—more than anyone else ever could. I've always understood you and noticed you, and I don't know if I can ever stop." He finished.
Naruto stared at him, almost like he was in a trance.
Then, he flustered. Extensively.
"I–Wow. Uh—"
Oh.
A small smirk appeared on Sasuke.
It was Sasuke's turn to lean back and watch.
"You what?" Sasuke asked, head tilting slightly.
He looked utterly hopeless. "What—huh?"
Sasuke stared at him.
"Oh! I mean, that's… nice?" He laughed nervously, scrambling to sit up straight.
Then, just slightly, he began rocking back and forth.
"I'm definitely—uh—not opposed to that. Like at all." He ran a hand through his hair.
He opened his mouth, and closed it after nothing came out.
Then, he repeated that gesture for about three more times before Sasuke couldn't bear to watch anymore.
Sasuke lied back down, his head hitting the pillow softly. "I'm going back to sleep. Wake me up once you've figured out how to speak." He pulled the covers over his head and turned away.
Naruto blinked.
"What! No, you can't do that!" He crawled into the bed, trying to shake Sasuke awake but the man did not budge. "Sasuke!"
Sasuke pulled the blanket down so only his eyes were visible, and he peeked out. "You don't even know what you're saying."
"Uh—yeah, I do! I'm saying that I feel the same way about you, and I think we should probably kiss now," he said, hovering over the other.
And there it was.
Sasuke pulled the covers over his head once again, and smirked. "I'm not kissing you right now."
"What? Why not? That's like the universal rule!" Naruto whined.
"Says who?"
Naruto paused, then tilted his head. "The universe?"
"What."
"Even Jiraiya said it was—"
"Don't finish that sentence."
He sighed and crawled under the blanket. "Okay, tomorrow then." Naruto mumbled.
But under the covers, Sasuke shifted just a little closer, and moved his leg in-between Naruto's. He leaned in and placed his lips right above Naruto's. It was quick and dry, but the that was more than enough for now, that's what he thought, at least—because when Naruto lifted his chin up, his lips parted and his hand was buried in the head of blonde hair.
They kissed again.
And again.
And once more before Sasuke finally had lost the steady rhythm of his breath.