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It’s guilt that keeps Leo up after his birthday.
He knows it’s late, even more so in Korea, where the majority of his fanbase is. However, he also knows that he’d regret not thanking as many people as he could, especially when he had been hard at work the entire day
He chastises himself for feeling tired now. Was it not a good problem to have thousands of messages waiting for you as soon as you turned on your phone? It sure hadn’t been this many from the years before.
Before he loses all his energy, he goes through his social media methodically, replying to greetings he had missed since morning, mostly from friends outside work and colleagues he had had over the years. He takes in the news they send him about fans doing all sorts of activities to celebrate his day, and it warms his heart to see them thank him when he feels the most thankful.
Reading birthday greetings heightens his gratitude, his mouth cracking into the tiniest of grins like he was worried someone was watching his facial expressions. Everyone he’s been around can tell he hasn’t had the best of days after Los Angeles, so the little pockets of strength mean more to him now.
He loses himself in his notifications, obsessively scrolling through each tag to see what he can find. It probably isn’t the healthiest thing to do when he’s supposed to be up at the ass crack of dawn, but he gives it as a problem for future Leo to handle.
Soon enough, when he’s snuggled into the sheets, still idly scrolling through his phone, his KakaoTalk pings with a new message. His brows furrow in thought at one of the maknaes still being up way past their bedtime, but he quickly erases it when he sees Sangwon’s contact name on the screen.
Go to sleep, Sangwon.
He types in the chat before reading the message, concerned about the idol getting even less rest than him. He only registers the text as a whole bunch of gibberish with a screengrab of his pants after he presses send.
What ?? After you revealed Sanghyeon’s gift on live???
Manager-nim’s not happy about it btw
He’s not typing anymore, but his status never changes to offline, which means Leo had to answer if he didn’t want to suffer him sulking in the morning.
He can’t be mad. It was my birthday.
And I’ll deal with him tomorrow.
Sangwon sends him an annoyed emoji, and he sighs at the screen. Great, he was going to have to deal with the man sulking at him during their flight—and on a day before comeback, too.
He debates the consequences of leaving the app and pretending to have fallen asleep before he gets a reply. He doesn't reach a conclusion when he receives another reply.
I’m outside your room.
Oh. Well, there was no escaping it. Might as well resolve a tiff now than to let it fester.
His legs bring him to the door, his hand opening it tentatively, expecting a sassy Sangwon to be waiting for him outside. He doesn’t anticipate his best friend to be smiling, bleary eyes sparkling and his arms out wide to present Leo with an egg tart.
“I-I don’t understand,” he says dumbly, a hand scratching the back of his neck at the display. Hadn’t they all agreed to go their separate ways after their award show?
Sangwon huffs, a lighthearted noise, making his way inside the room with the egg tart under great care. Leo follows after him, too embarrassed to kick him out despite the hour.
“Happy birthday, Leo-hyung!”
He says it noisily, much too loud for a silent hotel room.
“My birthday ended over an hour ago, Sangwonnie.”
There’s no real bite in his tone, his sternness overcome by delight that Sangwon came to see him before their flight back home. He had seen him completely wiped out after their performances, and Leo would be lying if he said he didn’t miss spending more time with one of his oldest friends in a day they’ve spent together for years.
The younger idol holds back a laugh, “Not with me, it hasn’t.”
“I didn’t think you’d come here after the schedules,” he rambles truthfully, “and you’ve been stressed, especially since we came back to Seoul… You could’ve been asleep by now.”
“Maybe,” Sangwon doesn’t lose his smile, even when the fatigue becomes more apparent in his face, “but I didn’t want anyone else to be the last one you see on your birthday.”
If facial expressions could have subtitles, Leo’s sure his would be a giant question mark.
“Eat your egg tart, Leo.”
Sangwon places the still-pristine pastry near the edge of his lips, looking over Leo until he opens his mouth to receive the gift. He giggles with delight when the idol bites into it, and he doesn’t lower his arms until the tart is half gone.
“I’m full, and I already brushed my teeth,” Leo complains as he chews through the pastry. “You should have the rest of it.”
“You’re such a kid,” Sangwon remarks, but eats the remainder anyway. He folds the tart's tin container and narrowly misses Leo’s waste bin when he tries to dispose of it. “Did you like it, though?”
“Come on, you know I’d love it. You know everything about me.”
The younger idol tilts his head and moves closer to Leo’s personal space, so much so that their knees touch. He uses the sleeve of his long shirt to delicately wipe the crumbs off the edge of Leo’s mouth, letting his palm linger on his cheek.
“You think so, hyung?”
“What are you talking about? You’ve known me the longest, and we spend almost every day together. If there was anything more than a ‘best friend’, you’d have that, too, you know.”
“Like your family, then?”
Leo doesn’t exactly know what he’s getting at. Sangwon’s his dongsaeng for sure, or maybe a ‘bro’ like most of the friends his age are. But the idea of actually thinking of Sangwon as his brother was absurd, especially when his thumb swipes in between the seam of his lips.
“It's whatever you want, baby.”
Sangwon belly-laughs, dropping his hand to Leo’s shoulder to keep himself from falling. “Definitely not your family,” he exhales, grin fully intact once again.
Leo faces the ground, heat climbing up his neck. “Yeah, maybe not that.”
“I don’t get why you’re so embarrassed on your birthday of all days. You just flashed your fanbase on live.”
There was no way he could look up now, his senses telling him that Sangwon was staring right at him.
“N-no, I didn’t. I was showing them Sanghyeonie’s gift.”
He hears the idol chuckle at that, his knees bending the slightest, so Leo’s forced to look into his eyes. “And did that need a lengthy introduction? Or you pulling down your sweats?”
“I guess not…”
“You wound me, hyung. For a minute there, I was seeing random people talk about you like a meal. And then you didn’t reply to my text—didn’t you want me to see?”
“No. Yes. I mean,” he gains more uncertainty with every word, yet he wants to convey that he was being sincere in his explanation, “…That was different, Sangwon. It wasn’t even the real thing.”
The dancer slinks down lower, his knees bending at an angle until he's completely plopped down, eyes staring up at Leo as he kneels.
“And what would the real thing be?”
It's a sight to behold — which meant Leo was entirely fucked.
His best friend tugs on the tie of his sleep shorts, then pulls the fabric down abruptly. The impact is so sudden that he feels the cotton graze through his soft length, making him shiver uncontrollably.
“No boxers on?” Sangwon asks, even though he knows this was his usual state when he went to bed.
The younger idol isn’t this daring most of the time, much like Leo was. They had stopped their trysts from escalating most times, mainly because doing anything more than make out was acknowledging something they had successfully evaded naming.
“You’re not drunk, are you?”
Sangwon breathes out an annoyed sigh, the huff of air unfortunately caressing his rapidly hardening dick.
“Not unless you want me to be.”
“Then why…?”
“Is it so wrong for me to want to please you on your birthday? I want to make you feel so good, hyungie, and you look like you’d rather be anywhere else.”
Instead of anger marring his features, his friend’s expression is filled with sadness, lips quivering like he might tear up at any given moment.
Did Leo really make him that upset? Then why did it send more of his blood rushing south?
Shit. Leo’s stuck between a rock and a hard place. Quite literally.
“Sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you,” he pats Sangwon’s head from where he stands, not knowing if it’s enough to placate the man. “I’m just really shocked, is all… Of course, you can, uhm. Whatever you wanna do.”
The man’s face lights up brightly, so Leo must’ve said the right thing. Sangwon lets his hands coil on the back of the elder's thighs, holding them steady before licking an experimental stripe on the underside of his cock.
“Jesus Christ, holy shit!”
“What?” Sangwon asks, pink tongue dragging down to the seam of his balls.
“A heads-up would have been nice,” he pants, willing himself not to go full-mast embarrassingly quick.
“You said I could do whatever I wanted,” the younger idol replies cheekily. He’d be annoyed if he didn’t find this more petulant side of Sangwon disgustingly sexy.
“That mouth of yours is going to get you in big tro—oh fuck.”
Again, without pretense, Sangwon takes as much as he can in his mouth. If he weren’t hard before, he was certainly chubbing up as his best friend struggled to keep his dick from slipping out. The man’s idle hands come as reinforcements, twisting at the base of his length that could no longer fit.
He bobs his head up and down, the tip hitting the back of his throat without Leo even thrusting himself in yet. And Leo hasn’t had too many blowjobs as of late, so this was already one of the best ones he’s gotten in his life.
Maybe a bit better if Sangwon actually choked on his cock.
“Sangwonnie,” he pats him softly on the cheek to get his attention, to no avail. The idol was simply too locked in on his task, the rhythm he’d established too precious to break when he, himself, was lost in pleasure.
“Baby, listen to me.”
Leo weans him off with a sharp tug to his hair, drawing a moan deep from Sangwon’s throat. He finally stops bobbing, eyes lidded in pleasure and mouth firmly planted on his cock.
“Can I thrust into your mouth, baby? Would you let hyung fuck your throat?”
Whatever fear Leo had about his ideas being rejected flies out the window with Sangwon’s eager nods. He croaks out a warbled string of ‘yes’ and ‘please’ until Leo taps the edge of his lips with the tip of his cock.
“Slap my thighs if it’s too much, okay? We don’t have to continue if it’s uncomfy for you.”
“I know, hyungie,” Sangwon manages, voice hoarse from exertion. They were genuinely so fucked if he lost his voice the day after, so he hopes to make this as quick as possible.
Honestly, not a hard task when Sangwon’s blissed-out face already makes him want to cum.
He enters inch by inch, checking the idol’s expression for any signs of discomfort. When he doesn’t find any, he slowly rocks his hips back and forth, easing himself in with the little patience he has left.
“That’s it, you’re doing so well for me.”
The praise seems to work wonders for Sangwon. He puffs up his cheeks wider and takes him in gulps, almost going all the way in one particular thrust.
“I’m going to go faster now, baby. You can take it, right?”
Sangwon hums, the vibration making him groan aloud.
“Yeah, exactly that. You feel fucking amazing, baby.”
He holds onto the back of Sangwon’s head securely, his hips driving into the man’s mouth completely and letting his nose press onto his skin. Leo makes him stay there for a couple of seconds before pulling out midway and slamming again at a relentless pace.
With every moan that Sangwon was barely concealing and the dexterity of his hands in playing with his neglected balls, Leo gets more fuel to fuck him to his heart’s content. Soon enough, he stutters in his movements, overwhelmed by his group member's sheer determination to bring him to release.
“Sangwonnie, I’m about to come. Ah, can I come on your face?”
Sangwon nods eagerly, bobbing his head in time with Leo’s thrusts with a new burst of energy. The molten heat building inside his belly spreads to his entire body, and he has to pull himself away when he feels his orgasm approaching.
“Fuck, so beautiful…” he mumbles as he jerks himself off on Sangwon’s expectant face. His cum splatters on the man’s cheeks, on the bridge of his nose, and on his cupid’s bow, painting one of the prettiest pictures he’s ever seen.
“You were incredible,” he marvels, gently wiping the evidence of his orgasm from the man’s face. He feels absolutely satisfied, his limbs loose and his mind ready to sleep like the dead.
“Did I do a good j-job, hyung?”
Sangwon’s still catching his breath in the aftermath, yet the softness in his demeanor was back in full force.
“The best, baby. It’s like you were made for me.”
“Good,” he beams dopily. “That’s really good, hyungie.”
“Can I make it up to you, then?” He asks, carefully guiding the man by his armpits to his feet. If he was anything like Leo, he probably wanted his own release, too.
“What do you want to do?”
“Let me help you, Sangwon-ah.” His eyes dart at the obvious tent in the man’s sleep shorts.
Sangwon’s face turns pink when he looks down at himself. “Yeah, but I probably won’t take long now.”
“That’s okay. May I?”
He slinks his hand under Sangwon’s shorts, tugging at his hard dick like he would for himself. He notes the particular pressures Sangwon seemed to like, or a specific flick of his wrist that makes the younger man whimper. Finding more courage leads his other hand to the hem of Sangwon’s shirt, his hand extending upwards to circle one of his nipples, flicking his thumb on the nub.
He’s too caught up with his informal research to tell just when the man is about to come, only finding out when he feels warm wetness on his fingertips when he grazes the head of his cock.
“Are you close, baby?”
“Mmmhmm, feels really good,” Sangwon moans, laying his forehead on Leo’s shoulder as he takes and takes what Leo gives him. He’s perfectly responsive like this, and it only makes Leo want to do a better job at getting him off. He speeds up his strokes in time with him squeezing Sangwon's perky tits, using all the tricks he's learned from tonight to maximize the man's pleasure.
“Gonna come, Leo-hyung…” he gasps suddenly against the elder’s collarbone, body tensing and shuddering as spurts of cum land on Leo's fist.
Their close proximity lets Leo hear every sound that comes out of Sangwon’s mouth when he orgasms, and he feels pride knowing it was he who caused those sounds. When he finally comes down from his high, Sangwon nudges Leo to look him in the eye, a determined furrow on his brows.
“Kiss. Here.”
He signals to his lips, the exaggerated pucker being a funny sight when his face was damp with sweat and cum. Leo would snicker, too, if Sangwon didn’t look like he was seconds away from begging for it.
“Whose birthday is it, really?”
Sangwon grumbles, but lets Leo cup his puffed-up cheeks and plant a searing kiss on his lips.
“Oh, shut up-mph!”
Leo likes to think he takes his time in these situations, always easing Sangwon up before he devours him whole. But he also thinks he deserves a pass on his birthday, and Sangwon’s pliant enough to open his mouth even further, allowing Leo to slip his tongue inside without any resistance.
He feels like he shotgunned three cans of energy drinks with how buzzed his body feels. Maybe it was pathetic how his skin was overheating from a mere kiss after he had already gotten head, but Sangwon’s gasps and whines as he roams his hands all over his body give him little reason to care.
The younger idol groans when Leo gropes his ass through his boxers, accidentally biting his lower lip too hard.
“Crap, sorry, hyungie,” Sangwon pants, genuinely apologetic.
Leo licks his lip, pleasantly surprised it doesn’t taste like copper despite the sting. “No harm done, I think.”
He wastes no time latching his lips back to Sangwon’s, taking as much as he can before he has to get through the annoying predicament of sending him back to his room now that he had gotten his gift.
“Hyung, Leo-hyung…” Sangwon taps on his chest lightly, prompting him to unlatch their lips. Leo regards him fondly, not wanting to rush him when he struggled to get his words out.
“You know I love you the most, right?”
Leo’s breath falters then, the high from the man’s kisses crashing without warning.
Having Sangwon love someone, or at the very least, look up to them, already feels like getting a prize. The genuine sparkle in his eyes when he talks about someone he loves is something his peers work hard to achieve, and while Leo is fortunate to be included in the list of Sangwon’s loved ones — to be loved the most is the equivalent of winning the lottery.
Perhaps he’s wished for it for years, even before Sangwon had decided to upend his life to debut with him, and way before he knew he liked kissing Sangwon like it was second nature.
Yet, actually being chosen was never expected.
“I don’t…I don’t understand. There are so many other people…”
Sangwon smiles wanly, fingers finding Leo’s to lace them together.
“And yet, I wouldn’t do this just for anyone—even if it were their birthday.”
Leo lets their foreheads touch, if only to avoid Sangwon’s eyes, which he’s sure are full of sincerity.
“Let me remind you that I came back for you, and every day since then, you’ve never given me a reason to give this up. You’ve never let me go.”
He allows himself to melt into him, unable to deny his words this time. Sangwon deserves to be on stage; Leo has believed in this since the day they met.
“I’d never. Not for anything.”
"I know."
Leo exhales at Sangwon’s stubbornness, ultimately touched that he’d gone so far to convince him. “I’ll keep making sure that you don’t regret it, then.”
The man smacks him on the arm, “Not happening.”
“Ouch!” He half-shouts, more to diffuse the somber mood he put them in. It was his birthday, for crying out loud, not a funeral.
“I’ll smack you again if you keep saying that,” Sangwon chuckles, his adorable bunny teeth showing. “You’ll just have to believe that I love you like this, hyung.”
“Okay,” he bites his lip to stifle a laugh, “Okay, baby. I love you the most, too.”
Sangwon’s grin widens, and he throws himself in front of the man, letting himself be carried in his arms.
“I knew it.”
“Don’t get too cocky now,” Leo smiles, tightening his grip so the man doesn’t fall and hurt himself.
“Nope, you said it. And I got to surprise you on your birthday, so my win is doubled.”
He can’t hold his laughter anymore, needing to settle Sangwon on the desk so he can be as boisterous as he wanted. “Yeah, thanks for sucking my dick.”
The younger man scrunches his nose in disgust. “You make it sound yucky.”
“I promise, it was anything but that. I meant it when I said it was amazing.”
“If it was so amazing, does that mean you won’t make me go back to my room this time?”
Leo sighs exasperatedly, ruffling Sangwon’s hair placatingly. He had gone beyond his limits on their schedules today, and the sagged shoulders and knee bruises that had yet to heal became more prominent the longer he stayed in the leader's room.
“You still have to. You have to be at your best, Sangwonnie.”
If he had his way, they would have been lying in bed since earlier. Sangwon would fall asleep pressed next to him, just like he did a week ago, and they wouldn't need to worry about staff barging into their rooms in a couple of hours. But they were at a pivotal moment, and he’s not about to make things harder for their team.
He’s still trying to prove himself to Sangwon, even when his best friend told him he didn’t need to feel burdened. He can’t help it.
“After the comeback, let me make it up to you. Let’s do something, just us.”
"I'll look forward to it, then."
Some sparkle returns to the man's eyes, his legs swinging excitedly atop the desk. Leo wonders if Sangwon is nice enough to the birthday boy that he lets himself be kissed senseless before he leaves.