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The silence following his big reveal is a lot, but for the first time in a while it doesn’t feel stifling to breath. The air just moves, in and out, without struggle. Sunny had forgotten how easy it was to just exist.
Sunny took in the little details of the room, the cold tiles on his bare feet, the faint smell of sanitiser, the sound of basil’s gentle breathing.
Everything was going to be okay.
In hindsight maybe Sunny should have expected the slap to his face, but if he had he certainly wouldn’t have expect it to hurt that much.
“You’re a liar!!! Admit it Sunny, you’re just lying for attention or something.”
Sunny has admitted enough he feels.
“Don’t go silent again. Answer me Sunny.”
“Aubrey”, Hero reaches out a hand to her shoulder, “It’s ok.”
“Don’t tell me that Hero, it’s not ok! How can it ever be ok? He can’t lie to us like this.”
“I don’t think he’s lying Aubrey…” Heros’ voice sounds shaky.
Sunny doesn’t look up, but he can hear Aubrey’s breath hard and heavy next to him. He can’t bring himself to look her in the eyes yet. One day he will, but it will take more than a day to fix his avoidance issues completely. He prepares himself to be hit again, but he isn’t surprised when she backs off and runs.
The hospital is so quiet he can hear her footsteps echo away for quite some time.
Hero sighs, “I should probably go after her. I don’t think she should be alone right now.” He steps towards the door and stops. “Thank you for telling us Sunny. It must have been hard after so long to keep this secret in. I can’t imagine what the two of you have been through hiding this.”
Hero seems to hesitate at the door. As if there is something else unsaid.
“I’m, I’m glad to know that it really wasn’t my fault.”
And Hero leaves too. Leaving just Sunny, Basil, and Kel.
“Sunny, this has been the best week of my life in 4 years. What you did to her, to Mari, it’s horrible. But… it was an accident. You said it was an accident, and I believe you. I know you never hurt her like that on purpose…” Although Kel says this, he doesn’t look Sunny in the eye.
“I wish I had known,” He whispers over Basil, as if he could hear him. “If I’d known I, I don’t know what I’d have done. Maybe I would have pushed you all to hang out more. Maybe I wouldn’t have left Basil alone, let you isolate yourself. Maybe…” His voice fades out.
There is a long silence, Sunny had spent the last 4 years dreading every moment of silence. Silence was just more time to remember what he’d done, to punish himself. He’d spent so long avoiding these moments so that nothing broke inside him that it felt weird how calm his brain was now.
“You were right for not telling us.” Kel looks up at Sunny, catching him straight in the eye. His mouth widens in a big smile, a typical Kel smile, but the context here is grim as a tear drops down his cheek. “We were children. Me, Hero, Aubrey, we were just kids. If you’d told us, we would have cracked instantly and then you two would be in jail for an accident.”
Basil is pale and seems somehow even smaller in this hospital bed. Sunny wishes he’d asked Hero first if he was going to be ok, maybe he should have had one last conversation with them all together before everything changed. Kel is still here, but for how long?
“Sunny, I forgive you.”
Which is all it takes for Sunny to cry too.