Cuntymin77
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or: Namjoon's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Kim Namjoon is a simple man.
Well, that's not entirely true. But his wants are few, and humble at that.
He wants to make music with his friends. He wants to ride his bike along the riverside. He wants to achieve a state of inner peace so complete that even this doesn't break him.
But most of all, at this precise moment in time, he wants to take his foot and shove it directly into Jeon Jeongguk's mouth.
Inspired by the recent GQ interview, Jimin cannot keep his hands to himself, Jungkook plots a murder, and Namjoon really just wants to hire an Etsy witch to fix his problems for him.
Bookmarked by Cuntymin77
04 Aug 2026
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At almost thirty-one, Park Jimin has achieved the ultimate millennial dream: a thoroughly mediocre corporate existence that demands absolutely nothing of his soul. He has his ergonomic chair, his perfectly timed commute to avoid elevator small talk, and a flawless system of mutual procrastination with his work-bestie, Hoseok. His life is boring, ordinary, and exactly the way he likes it.
Then their boss hires Jeon Jungkook.
--------Jungkook was standing up, leaning his forearms over the low fabric partition that separated their desks. He was smiling brightly, pointing a finger directly at Jimin's monitor.
"I saw the little 'Jimin is typing' bubbles popping up on Slack for like two minutes, so I figured you were taking a break from your presentation," Jungkook said, completely oblivious to the murderous intent radiating from Jimin's soul. "Since you're answering now, I can just walk you through my notes! It's super fast, I promise."
Jimin slowly slid his headphones down to his neck. His sanctuary was breached. His code was under attack. Synchronous, unprompted communication was happening.
His boring, ordinary life was officially over.
Series
- Part 1 of The Anxiety Spreadsheets
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 71,854
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Comments:
- 421
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- 1,240
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- 505
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Bookmarked by Cuntymin77
02 Aug 2026
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"If you wanna, if you wanna, I'll do the thing for you," is mumbled in between steps of kimchi jjigae preparation. It's another thing to purposefully listen to things that he's heard millions of times before and could dance to in his sleep. Yet, he found himself pulling up "Please" from their ARIRANG album a few years ago with specific feelings in mind. The song is about pure yearning, a promise to stay by one's side through the tough times as well as the boring ones forevermore.
Jeongguk smiles to himself. These lines hold more meaning to him than usual.
Or, the pleasantly normal daily life of Jeon Jeongguk.
Bookmarked by Cuntymin77
02 Aug 2026
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“You. Suck,” Jimin spits at Jungkook.
“Okay, now that’s definitely unfair.” Jungkook steps forward, reaching out to Jimin, hands at either side of his waist.
“Don’t—don’t—”
“Push me away if you don’t want it.”
Jimin doesn’t push him away. He just pounds at Jungkook’s chest with his fist once and repeats meekly, “you suck.”
Arms snake warmly around Jimin’s body and Jungkook’s nose jams into Jimin’s cheek, where he stays for a long minute, swaying their bodies back and forth together.
“I’m so sorry, hyung,” he whispers against Jimin’s skin. “I totally forgot about our boba date.”
OR
Five different days throughout Jimin and Jungkook’s relationship where they apologize to each other after a fight, strengthening their connection with each sweet resolution.
Series
- Part 3 of Loving You
Bookmarked by Cuntymin77
01 Aug 2026
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Jeongguk has never been a fan of the holidays, but all that is about to change when he finally gives in after years of nagging and takes his brother, Seokjin, up on his offer to spend the season at Princess Lodge and Resort, a charming luxury getaway nestled at the base of a scenic mountain range. He arrives with no plans to take part in the seasonal lineup of activities, but all of that is about to change thanks to one shy, pretty omega with a silver bell laugh and a mysterious past who claims to have never gotten the chance to celebrate Christmas…
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 73,169
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 259
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- 1,002
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- 376
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- 21,109
Bookmarked by Cuntymin77
28 Jul 2026