SafeWordMandrake
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DO NOT POST ON WATTPAD I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION!
Another eighth year fic where they get kinda drunk and shit happens.
This is really just a fantasy that I've been thinking about for a while and is a long exposition about Draco eating Hermione out in front of everyone.First fic ever so comments welcome but please be nice! Open ending so might add on.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,825
- Chapters:
- 5/?
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 401
- Kudos:
- 3,232
- Bookmarks:
- 817
- Hits:
- 195,851
Bookmarked by SafeWordMandrake
29 Aug 2025
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“In my humble opinion there’s only three things that men should be and that is bloody, slutty, and pathetic.” And, on a good day, Draco Malfoy can be all three.
When war heroine Hermione Granger and Azkaban-tattooed war criminal Draco Malfoy are forced to wed as part of Shacklebolt’s controversial Reconciliation Act, they openly fight the match and each other—their public brawls breathlessly reported by the press.
Secretly, a deeply traumatized Draco delights in Hermione’s attention and pines for a real marriage with her—even as her forced proximity to the Black family magic irritates the cursed scar Bellatrix left on her arm, reminding her why she can never truly trust or forgive him. Then Hermione discovers that Draco’s blood will soothe the scar . . . and Draco is willing to trade his blood for her body.
(With post-war blood purity politics, black market potioneers, Pansy Parkinson’s career advice, the Malfoys blackmailing Hermione’s Wizengamot opposition, BDE Neville Longbottom hunting Death Eaters, a slutty Theo Nott serving as Draco’s right-hand man, and Crookshanks loose in Malfoy Manor.)
Series
- Part 1 of THE BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC SERIES
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 195,969
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Comments:
- 7,535
- Kudos:
- 32,092
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- 12,702
- Hits:
- 1,966,025
Bookmarked by SafeWordMandrake
28 Aug 2025
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After three years of dating, Ron admits he cheated on Hermione for two of those years with Daphne Greengrass--and Harry knew all about it. Reeling from the betrayal by her friends and family, Hermione must rebuild her life and discover new bonds with an unlikely group including Theo Nott, Blaise Zabini, and Pansy Parkinson.
What happens when Draco Malfoy, her first and deepest love, suddenly reappears in Hermione's life and she finds that her feelings have only grown deeper with time?
OR: Hermione and Draco secretly dated at Hogwarts, he left after his trial, and now he's returned to win her back.
Series
- Part 1 of The AVO Chronicles
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 288,120
- Chapters:
- 32/32
- Collections:
- 31
- Comments:
- 2,823
- Kudos:
- 24,436
- Bookmarks:
- 10,237
- Hits:
- 1,769,613
Bookmarked by SafeWordMandrake
28 Aug 2025
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The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy by speechwriter
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
18 Jun 2021
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The night that Harry and Dumbledore return from the cave, the Death Eaters are delayed from reaching the top of the Astronomy Tower for one more minute. Draco Malfoy lowers his wand.
A Deathly Hallows rewrite in which Draco accepts Dumbledore's offer to fake his death and go into hiding with the Order of the Phoenix.
Series
- Part 1 of The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 289,780
- Chapters:
- 33/33
- Collections:
- 90
- Comments:
- 5,615
- Kudos:
- 26,414
- Bookmarks:
- 12,712
- Hits:
- 1,878,843
Bookmarked by SafeWordMandrake
28 Aug 2025
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Hermione Granger comes to Hogwarts to teach a much needed Biology curriculum to the students. Draco Malfoy, the Potions teacher, doesn't approve of the sex ed. A bet ensues. Who will come out victorious? Rated M for lemons and adult themes. **WINNER: BEST FLUFF/HUMOR 2017 Dramione Awards**
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 137,474
- Chapters:
- 31/32
- Comments:
- 377
- Kudos:
- 3,599
- Bookmarks:
- 1,705
- Hits:
- 208,504
Bookmarked by SafeWordMandrake
28 Aug 2025