Umm_idfk
Fandoms
Recent works
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Doors by Umm_idfk
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types, Iron Lung (2026)
31 Aug 2026
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Summary
Simon is newly graduated on the government's dime, recovering mentally and physically from the Navy submarine accident that took his arm and scarred his face, and equal parts excited and nervous for his first year teaching. Somehow, after everything he's done, he gets to be the one kids ask questions and trust to give the right answer. The paycheck and sense of purpose more than make up for how alone he is.
Ryland Grace has two best friends who love and care for him, the job of his dreams, a boss he loves, and a suspiciously high paycheck for a middle school science teacher. So why is he still so lonely?
A tour of the building, matching scars, and a fragile comraderie, and suddenly their lives are far more intertwined than either is fully comfortable with.
Their friends and colleagues are almost as invested in their budding relationship as the nerdy middle schoolers are in shipping their favorite teachers.
These oblivious idiots might need a little push in the right direction
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On the Edge of the World by Umm_idfk
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types, Iron Lung (2026)
25 Aug 2026
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Ryland Grace is afraid of heights. Unfortunately, the summer job he agreed to in hopes of avoiding having to get a roommate is at the top of the highest point in the continental United States.
Luckily for him, his quiet, mysterious wilderness guide with sad eyes and scars that match Grace's own is more than competent. And hot. Did he mention how hot the man he'll be trapped with for the next five days is?
And there was only one tent.
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Human by Umm_idfk
Fandoms: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types, Project Hail Mary (2026), Iron Lung (2026)
17 Aug 2026
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Summary
Ryland Grace— savior of two planets— uses that title to get whatever he wants from the rock aliens that serve him. That familiar, human, tendency to abuse status and power is the only reason Simon knows that this is real— that Erid and Ryland aren't another trick, and Simon the Butcher gets to keep them.
Only, he's known Ryland for months now, and the short tempered, scarily intelligent, sad, *kind*, man he knows doesn't seem like the type to ask for anything at all
The rock that barely tolerates him has a surprise for both of them, and Simon still has more to learn about his housemate.
Or: Simon falls in love with Grace's flaws before his virtues
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God Sent by Umm_idfk
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types, Iron Lung (2026)
04 Aug 2026
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Summary
Ryland Grace is alone. Completely and utterly alone. He just commended his crewmates to the stars— the last people he will ever see are long, long dead, and he is alone. He's going to die alone. He doesn't want to die.
Simon is dying. He might already be dead. That stupid fucking eel might have killed him and brought him back just to fuck with him some more before killing him again. No one is coming to save him. He's going to die here— alone and forgotten. He just wants to live.
A pinhole God takes pity on this broken, desperate, hopeful man— sacrificed for the good of humanity in a sea of blood and dead stars. Digging through the folds of space and time, it finds another pinhole— another broken, desperate, and hopeful man sacrificed for the good of humanity. A star saver.
Yes, he will do, and they will live, and we will see the answer together.
A flash of light, unravelling, a flood of blood, and both of them are convinced they're hallucinating. But you can't touch a hallucination, and Simon still has that fucking eel in his head.
Or: slow burn PHM plot starting pre-rocky, this time with more trauma, learning to trust, and bloodymary!
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I'm an Astronaut, You're the Moon (I Circle You) by Umm_idfk
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types, Iron Lung (2026)
28 Jul 2026
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☆ It only took 18 chapters, but BloodyMary (title pending) finally has a title. I ♡ Noah Kahan ☆
On what was supposed to be a quick round trip back to Earth for good food and eventual end-of-life care, The Hail Mary manages to get sucked through a worm hole.
Ryland Grace wakes up from his coma alone, with no memory, and a ship that is very angry about being tossed around and not having stars to navigate with.
At least he remembers his name, this time. And there are real, alive people orbiting a weird exo planet!!! Too bad they're kind of evil.
Somehow Simon, waiting on the deal that will earn him his freedom, is even more confused than the crazy guy he's supposed to get information out of before he goes.
Grace just really, really wants to go home.
Or: The BloodyMary fic where I take the Iron Lung Horrors TM and make them deal with it together before they get that sweet PHM-style hope
Recent bookmarks
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Twisting Quasars by MidnightMinutes
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Iron Lung (2026)
02 Sep 2026
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Summary
Simon takes a deal from an Eldtrich entity to gain his freedom. The only caveat is that he has to keep a certain lonely scientist company until he is happy. What could go wrong?
Bookmarked by Umm_idfk
02 Sep 2026
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Recalculated by Yesthatsmynaturalcolour
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Iron Lung (2026)
04 Sep 2026
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Summary
Grace wakes up on the Hail Mary with no memories, and one dead crew mate.
The other is still alive, and while he doesn't remember him he's sure ready for him to wake up.
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AU where Simon is apart of the original launch crew.
Bookmarked by Umm_idfk
02 Sep 2026
Bookmarker's Tags:
Bookmarker's Notes
ch. 8. Insanely well-written Simon on the HM crew yearning & were together b4 launch
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share your address by mimi_kc_i
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Iron Lung (2026)
10 Aug 2026
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Summary
"I really thought things would get easier after the pods." Ryland crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back into the uncomfortable arm chair.
Behind Ava he could still see the table where the others were arguing.
Could still hear them, too.
"You lying asshole!"
"Hey, we agreed that-"
"Jesus, and to think they pretended to be so perfect together."
Simon, still stuck at the table, caught his eye, doing his best to get between the people shouting vitriol at each other, calm things down as much as possible. Ryland winced.
"What gave you that idea?" Ava finally asked.
"I don't know." He sighed. "I won't make that mistake again."
or.
Ryland and Simon, having finally gotten together, expect the rest of the filming to go without drama.
That is not quite how it goes.
(title from: Share Your Address by Ben Platt)
Series
- Part 3 of Love is Blind AU (chronological)
Bookmarked by Umm_idfk
30 Jul 2026
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Through Blood and Starlight (Editing underway) by raptus_regaliter
Fandoms: Iron Lung (2026), Project Hail Mary (2026)
16 Aug 2026
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Summary
Simon expected the blood ocean to be the last place he would ever see.
Ryland Grace expected the Tau Ceti system to contain nothing except Astrophage, unanswered questions, and the impossible mission waiting ahead of him. Instead, the Hail Mary detects a human signal coming from a moon that should not exist.
Their first contact is little more than a broken voice cutting through the static. Simon is trapped beneath an unexplored ocean, surrounded by darkness and following orders from people he does not trust. Grace is stranded far above him, unable to understand how a human settlement, or an entire moon, appeared light years from where it belongs.
As the connection between them grows stronger, Grace becomes Simon’s only reliable link to the world above, and Simon becomes proof that Grace may not be as alone as he believed. But something is moving beneath the blood, the Consolidation does not want Grace interfering with the mission, and the mystery connecting AT-5 to Astrophage may be more dangerous than either of them realizes.
Across an impossible distance, two men who were never supposed to survive begin giving each other a reason to.
Bookmarked by Umm_idfk
15 Jul 2026
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The Convict, The Coward, and Their Rock by Basicperfectionist
Fandoms: Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types, Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Iron Lung (2026)
09 Aug 2026
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Summary
Roberto "Rocky" Stone, Ryland Grace, and Simon Butcher have spent the last two years working on Project Hail Mary. Rocky as a lead engineer, Grace as a top scientist and the right hand man of the project, and Simon as a hired gun assigned to guarding Grace. So when both primary and secondary crews tragically die in an astrophage accident just days before mission launch, Eva makes the choice to send them instead. It isn't a perfect choice. Things are bound to go wrong. But maybe, these three can save each other just as much as they are able to save humanity.
Bookmarked by Umm_idfk
15 Jul 2026