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There was no one left to pray to. No angels he cared about since Cas had been taken by the Empty. No God. There was Jack, whatever kind of God he was, but Dean didn’t pray to him either. He prayed to a thing inside himself. A creature who cowered and whined and hid its face under the blanket of a Hunter’s disguise, telling itself over and over that it was good. It was good and righteous and it had saved more than it had killed.
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It feels despicable, scooping half your pudding into my cup, but you look so proud when I do, like you’re pleased to’ve tricked me into eating, just like you used to, when you caught me saving every scrap of food for a more deserving mouth.
(Ya can’t take care’a Sammy if you’re dyin’a malnutrition, ya idjit, you used to say, voice as full of care as it was empty of nonsense. Eat up, boy. Ya look like a strong wind could carry ya off to Timbuktu.)
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Dean Winchester hates everything except writing, and after five extremely unfortunate bestselling Vatican-approved Catholic erotica novels, he's starting to hate that. After a couple of lawsuits and one North American book tour, he stops for the summer in Absofuckinglutely Nowhere, Newfoundland on a 6-month visa to try and pump out a final book in the series, and try to find a little room to breathe.
Father Thursday, by contrast, doesn't hate anything; not even really God anymore.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 163,993
- Chapters:
- 36/?
- Comments:
- 1,224
- Kudos:
- 977
- Bookmarks:
- 306
- Hits:
- 40,284
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
24 May 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
benedictions by kalmialatifolia, absolutely amazing fic.
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Sometimes, it can be hard to figure out what winning's supposed to mean.
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Summary
The body is something to be utilized.
Dean's relationship with sex, ages seventeen-and-a-half to forty-one.
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Everybody's Got A Hungry Heart by PallasPerilous for Pimento
Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005)
23 Feb 2022
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Summary
Dean is jumpy as shit. Why one possibly Icelandic beep-boop specialist has him on edge while Mick Jagger’s own vocal coach barely got his heart rate over 55bpm is a goddamn mystery. Maybe it’s the harp solos from that sample track; maybe Dean’s nervous that this is his last shot and if this guy can’t save Dean from filling out the back end of his contract with “Best Of” and “Live In Concert” compilations he might as well walk into the fucking sea.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,793
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 125
- Kudos:
- 741
- Bookmarks:
- 226
- Hits:
- 5,420
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
25 Dec 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Everybody's Got A Hungry Heart by PallasPerilous
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Summary
dean used to turn tricks. over a decade later, he met cas.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,587
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 405
- Kudos:
- 8,908
- Bookmarks:
- 2,334
- Hits:
- 112,880
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
21 Dec 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
like moses and batman and james dean by saltyfeathers
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you see me in the lovely garden tending by fleeceframe
Fandom Supernatural, Supernatural (TV 2005)
08 Jan 2024
- Words:
- 76,023
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 284
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
20 Oct 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
you see me in the lovely garden tending by fleeceframe
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- Words:
- 137,153
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 811
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Summary
Cas is in town to deal with the fledgling unionization that's taking place at the factory. It should be a cut-and-dried case. There shouldn't be any need to return. Definitely not to a dingy diner for a man who's married.
But Dean's husband is awful and Dean is the first person in a long, long time that Cas has wanted to let in.
So once Dean expresses interest, Cas finds his sense of decency crumbling. Even more so when Dean's carefree facade starts cracking whenever the two of them are alone.
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
10 Sep 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
the heart is a lonely hunter bu alaisabel. dont know how i hadnt bookmarked this earlier! followed through most of its updates and adore it so dearly.
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Sometimes, Dean wishes he’d met Castiel before. Back when the world was full and alive instead of empty, and darkness was nothing to fear. But then, if he had, would Dean have even looked at him twice? He had Lisa and Ben in those days, a career, and a whole planet full of possibilities spread before them.
No, Dean Winchester had to lose everything before meeting Castiel could mean anything.
Not that it really matters. There’s no going back now.Or, the apocalyptic AU where Dean is fighting a lonely battle to develop a cure for the virus that made him the last man on Earth—until suddenly, he's not. Dean’s old life ends the day Castiel shows up and turns his world upside down, giving him a reason to live and not just survive.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 50,417
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 380
- Kudos:
- 759
- Bookmarks:
- 256
- Hits:
- 11,678
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
15 Aug 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Darkness Round the Sun by castielslostwings
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Summary
On the last day of school before Christmas vacation, Mr. Castiel Quinn discovers that one of his young students has smuggled male pornography into the classroom. Upon being told that the photos belong to the boy's uncle, Castiel vows to himself that he will keep the other man's preferences a secret. It's 1947; a man experiencing attraction to another man or fantasising about his sexual touch are transgressive faults, which could potentially result in imprisonment - or worse. But then the uncle walks in. The photos are of him: Dean Winchester, a rogue with an empty pocket and a child to feed. Castiel doesn't know it yet, but his life is never going to be the same again. Years pass between chance meetings, but even though they live their lives apart, Dean and Castiel's story is proof that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 58,400
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 517
- Kudos:
- 1,786
- Bookmarks:
- 430
- Hits:
- 27,927
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
06 Aug 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Nine Times We Met (And One Christmas We Parted) by almaasi, this sticks in my head. it is so good
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Summary
A year ago, the world didn't end. Now it's summer and the cicadas are buzzing, and something is changing. Something is going to give.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,923
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 318
- Kudos:
- 3,781
- Bookmarks:
- 1,262
- Hits:
- 54,472
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
25 Jul 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
until the end and after by Philyra912, an amazing post-canon fixit that's so sweet
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Summary
Dean Winchester was always destined for the Olympics. Granted, his dad had hoped for a traditionally masculine sport, but as figure skating goes, Dean lifting and twirling a (female) partner across the ice is as close as it gets.
It’s also as close as Dean is gonna get to the things he privately hungers for. He gets to skate. He gets to compete on an international level. He even gets to be out as bisexual. So what if he doesn’t get to be the one soaring over the ice from a partner’s hands? It’s like a compromise. Or like having a brownie that’s made from black beans. It’s better than nothing, even if it doesn’t exactly get you all the way there.
But then rules change and all that’s missing is a certain Olympic champion with dreams of his own.
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
23 Jul 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
deep edge by alaisabel, this is such a fantastic sports fic and take on dean/cas.
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- Words:
- 43,088
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 733
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
16 Jul 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
chilli pepper 'verse by justanothersong, one of the early fandom fics i fell in love with.
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Summary
A week ago, Dean was pulled out of Hell. Now, he’s apparently woken up in 2018, and the angel that a mere twenty-four hours beforehand had threatened to chuck him back into the pit is sleepily pouring himself coffee and wearing Dean’s second-favourite Zeppelin shirt. It all seems like a perfect happy ending, but with Hell’s scars still so fresh, Dean can’t imagine how he could have possibly gotten there.
At the same time, the Dean who went to sleep in the bunker, right next to Cas, wakes up on Bobby’s couch in 2008. He’s instantly bombarded with questions by a Lilith-obsessed brother and a man who’s been dead for years, and must decide between keeping his finally-perfect life intact, and the lives he could save by re-writing history.
Regardless of these choices, both Deans are trapped in the wrong decade, and their only way back lies with a Castiel still very much under Heaven’s thumb – one who might find the future Dean describes difficult to believe.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,872
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 792
- Kudos:
- 16,762
- Bookmarks:
- 4,197
- Hits:
- 149,006
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
23 Jun 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
crazy diamonds by pantheon_of_discord, holy hell this was fantastic.
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Summary
John dies, and instead of being smart about it, Dean goes back to Cas.
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“You’ll hurt yourself,” he mumbles.
Cas just huffs.
“You’re not heavy.”
Well that’s a fucking lie, but Dean isn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth, so he burrows closer instead of arguing the point, shamelessly burying his nose against Cas’ warm skin.
Home. Even after three years apart he still smells like home.
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Summary
Coda to 12.01 Keep Calm and Carry On.
Mary always thought you were supposed to be able to tell. That you could just look at someone and know they were – you know. One of that sort. It’s not supposed to happen to her son.
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Summary
He’s not sure why it is only occurring to him now, that this man was at war, but something about the way he doesn’t mince words when talking about the casualties is bringing it home in the most brutal way.
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When Jack Kline is tasked with clearing out his estranged grandfather’s farm, he doesn’t expect to find much about the quiet, gentle man he hardly knew. Maybe some old clothes, broken furniture. Perhaps a phonebook or two.
What he finds is a photograph that leads him through a maze of letters, and he follows them right into the hidden life of a man he discovers he never knew at all.
~*~*~
His letters are short and to the point—we went here, stayed this long, I saw this many people I know die.
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For Dean Winchester, the war is a means to an end. A way to make some money and escape Kansas for a little while. His comrades are little more than people to watch his back while bullets fly by their heads.
Then, he finds the fighter pilot.
Everything changes.
In a moment of war, of love, and of borrowed time, nothing will ever be the same.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,528
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 122
- Kudos:
- 316
- Bookmarks:
- 101
- Hits:
- 3,841
Bookmarked by firstdoctor
07 Jan 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
the masterpiece that i came into entirely unware of, that burned into my brain
In a Moment of War by allmystars -
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Summary
Dean's a good boyfriend. He’s thoughtful about the little things, and the little things add up.
But, Sam notices, his relationships never last very long.
Series
- Part 8 of Promptober 2020