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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    No serious hockey fan or sports commentator worth their salt would have considered record-breaking Boston superstar Ilya Rozanov to be Shane Hollander’s rival exactly, but sleeping with a man who had a specific offense-related vendetta against him and a wrist shot like a jet engine to back it up was probably ill-advised just the same.

    Or, Shane is a goalie. Ilya can’t score.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    148,928
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    9,472
    Kudos:
    26,188
    Bookmarks:
    10,636
    Hits:
    847,529

    28 Aug 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shrugging one shoulder far more casually than he possibly feels, Ilya says, “I like both. Is secret, okay?”

    “Okay,” Hollander says, voice cracking.

    He doesn’t say anything else. The air’s so heavy around them that it feels like being in the middle of a scrum, the weight and heat of all those bodies pressing down on you. Danger always feels like hockey; it’s the most dangerous thing Ilya knows, except for this. Everything dangerous in his life involves men’s bodies and just how close he can get to them. Closer than he probably should.

    A year after mysteriously dropping out of the 2009 draft, Shane Hollander is signed by the Boston Raiders, right behind Ilya Rozanov. Having the two biggest stars in the league on the same line is great for Boston — but playing alongside their worst rival was never exactly in Shane or Ilya's plans. Especially not when staying away from each other starts to feel just as impossible as getting along.

    [COMPLETE]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    664
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    140
    Kudos:
    547
    Bookmarks:
    148
    Hits:
    17,909

    18 Aug 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shrugging one shoulder far more casually than he possibly feels, Ilya says, “I like both. Is secret, okay?”

    “Okay,” Hollander says, voice cracking.

    He doesn’t say anything else. The air’s so heavy around them that it feels like being in the middle of a scrum, the weight and heat of all those bodies pressing down on you. Danger always feels like hockey; it’s the most dangerous thing Ilya knows, except for this. Everything dangerous in his life involves men’s bodies and just how close he can get to them. Closer than he probably should.

    A year after mysteriously dropping out of the 2009 draft, Shane Hollander is signed by the Boston Raiders, right behind Ilya Rozanov. Having the two biggest stars in the league on the same line is great for Boston — but playing alongside their worst rival was never exactly in Shane or Ilya's plans. Especially not when staying away from each other starts to feel just as impossible as getting along.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    222,222
    Chapters:
    28/28
    Comments:
    18,342
    Kudos:
    49,647
    Bookmarks:
    18,965
    Hits:
    2,277,193

    18 Aug 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Perfection.

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    "Why," The officer repeats, leaning forward, "Were you at his apartment? You have to admit, it's pretty strange to—"

    "We're together." Shane interrupts, tone flat. It doesn't make his stomach churn to say it out loud. It doesn't make him want to shrink into the uncomfortable plastic chair he's sitting in. "We had a three-day stretch with no games, so I was staying with him."

    The officer bristles. He has a nametag, but Shane has no interest in reading it. He seems, overall, unconvinced. Shane supposes if he was a cop who was clearly awful at his job and stuck on the night shift, he'd probably be just as miserable.

    "Okay," He sighs, "Let's start again. Tell us what happened, from the beginning."

    [ or: or…hollanov get outed because of a home invasion, and the shooting isn’t even the worst part of ilya’s year! ]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,030
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    248
    Kudos:
    2,346
    Bookmarks:
    430
    Hits:
    20,028

    18 Aug 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    "Chlamydia?" Ilya has never heard Hollander's voice reach such heights in the absence of a cock. "You have chlamydia?"

    "I did not get it on purpose," Ilya complains.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,776
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    1,885
    Kudos:
    17,467
    Bookmarks:
    4,180
    Hits:
    132,627

    12 Aug 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane’s heart drops into his stomach. “Ilya,” he breathes. His vision goes blurry, throat tight. He tries to swallow it down and focus, shove his swirling thoughts into a neat little box, but it’s impossible. He feels—he might throw up, actually. “Are you seriously telling me you tried to fucking kill yourself?”

    “Yes,” Ilya agrees blandly, “It did not work.”

    Ilya calls Shane from the hospital. Shane handles it very normally.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,118
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    785
    Kudos:
    24,521
    Bookmarks:
    4,627
    Hits:
    155,834

    12 Aug 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    Maybe if the video ended there, Shane thought, it would be okay. Okayish. Still incriminating. Still a fucking disaster. Still embarrassing, to have his breakup with this beautiful actress filmed and disseminated on Reddit of all fucking places, but not a nail in his coffin, burying him alive. But the video didn’t end there.

    “Can I ask if you’ve ever been with another guy?” she had to ask.

    And he, tears visible in his eyes, had to nod.

    Just once. Just a single nod.

    Why did he have to nod?

    “Have you ever told anyone that before?” He shook his head. “Was it different? With a guy?”

    “Of course.”

    Of course.

    “Was it better?”

    “Yes.”

    +++

    Shane’s conversation with Rose is secretly recorded. Months later, after the All-Star game and Ilya’s confession in Russian, the video gets leaked online. Shane is outed to the world while Ilya is in Russia, and must now finish the 2016-2017 season with the entire world in on his secret.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,823
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    1,954
    Kudos:
    51,637
    Bookmarks:
    13,799
    Hits:
    757,964

    07 Aug 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    When Ilya is concussed during a game, he experiences a weird gap in his memories. He has completely forgotten two people he should apparently know: his longtime rival Shane Hollander, and a regular hookup named Jane.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,339
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    607
    Kudos:
    8,828
    Bookmarks:
    1,319
    Hits:
    50,740

    05 Aug 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Where are you going?”

    “To the arena, Hollander. We are playing a game in three hours.”

    “That’s tomorrow, Rozanov,” Hollander says, smirking like Ilya might be fucking with him and he wants to make sure he’s in on the joke. He looks behind and around him. “Um, can I come inside?”

    “Hollander, we have game today. You were here yesterday.”

    Hollander is striding toward his kitchen, looking over his shoulder at Ilya like he’s getting tired of the joke. “Very funny. I was in Montreal yesterday, Rozanov.”

    “Hollander.” Ilya goes to stand in front of him. Hollander’s eyes flicker up and down his body the way that Ilya usually craves, but is rather unwelcome right now. “Today is Thursday. Game is today. Yesterday, you came to my house. We ate tuna melts, watched Buffalo game. Then, you left.”

    “Rozanov, it’s Wednesday morning. And I’ve never been to your house before.”

    “Hollander…”

    “Look at your phone if you don’t believe me.”

    Ilya snorts like a bull and pulls his phone out of his pocket, swipes down on the screen to look at the date.

    Wednesday, November 9th.


    Or: Ilya Rozanov in Groundhog Day!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,332
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    1,066
    Kudos:
    8,412
    Bookmarks:
    2,455
    Hits:
    106,648

    05 Aug 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane should be here right now, should be in Ilya’s house. Ilya should be teasing him about being picky while going through delivery options for food on his phone. Shane should be discovering that Ilya has ginger ale in the fridge and the protein bars Shane mentioned liking in an interview in his pantry. He should be making out with Shane on the couch, sneaking a hand into his pants, teasing him about whether they can beat the deliveryman and arrive before he does. Shane was supposed to spend the night tonight, the Montreal team not set to leave until tomorrow afternoon because of potential bad weather in the morning. Shane should be fed and showered and ready to curl up in bed with Ilya tonight.
    But Shane is in a hospital.

    And Ilya is here.

    He pulls up Jane in his phone again. He presses call.

    “Hey, you’ve reached Shane Hollander-”

    Ilya closes his eyes and lets Shane’s voice roll over him.

    (canon divergence in which shane getting injured happens during a game in boston) (...which means shane then gets to go home with ilya to recover)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,930
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    762
    Kudos:
    11,664
    Bookmarks:
    2,836
    Hits:
    103,512

    01 Aug 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    ...oh,” his mom says. “Oh, honey, you were seeing someone? You never said anything.”

    “It’s-it’s complicated.” He catches the present tense too fucking late to do anything about it, and he barely resists the urge to either groan or slip forward to start beating his head against the coffee table.

    Fuck his fucking life.

    “You’re still…seeing this person?” His mom asks, and the amount of control he can hear her exerting is almost painful. “Who is-”

    “Yuna,” his dad cuts in, voice quiet, “maybe give him a second, yeah?”

    Yeah, Shane agrees in his head. Give him a second.

    Maybe give him a decade while they’re at it.

    (when shane's old fake id falls out of his wallet around his parents, he has to explain that it was to book hotel rooms before he was 21)

    (...and then he has to explain why he needed to book those hotel rooms in the first place)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,781
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    1,082
    Kudos:
    19,448
    Bookmarks:
    4,163
    Hits:
    123,283

    31 Jul 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    “You are planning to rob me or what?” He hears Rozanov call, and he can’t help but smile slightly even as he rolls his eyes, closing the door to the linen closet and feeling strangely lighter than when he opened it, reassured that he’s just trying to read into a blank page, that today doesn’t mean anything more than Rozanov doesn’t mind him being around, which is strangely flattering.

    “I don’t know,” he calls back. “Don’t Russians like diamonds and fur and stuff? Where should I start looking if I want to know what my options are?”

    He hears Rozanov laugh, and it makes him smile.

    When he joins him in the living room once more, Rozanov tugs him down to lean against him again. Shane goes easier this time, settling into it, knowing it doesn’t mean anything other than the fact that he just happens to be the closest warm body, the person on Rozanov’s roster who filled today’s slot.

    (the tuna meltdown doesn't happen) (this does not mean they get ANY better at communication)

    (or: how shane didn't realize he had a boyfriend for several months)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,094
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,526
    Kudos:
    26,183
    Bookmarks:
    7,353
    Hits:
    252,496

    29 Jul 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    “Go?” Rozanov repeats, and Shane thinks he manages to nod, thinks he manages to spin some kind of excuse that he knows Rozanov doesn’t really buy, but he needs to go. He needs to get out of here. He needs to find somewhere quiet and calm where he can ride out this panic and painful tightness until he can catch his breath again. He needs-

    He needs to go.

    “I’m sorry,” he says, turning heel and resisting the urge to just book it right for the front door only because he’d rather not have to explain to Hayden why he returned from a hookup with Boston Lily in men’s clothes that he certainly didn’t leave in.

    It’s not until he makes it halfway up the stairs to Rozanov’s bedroom that it occurs to him in a cold rush that it isn’t just anxiety that makes it this hard to breathe.

    “No,” he tells himself firmly, white knuckling the bannister and trying to take a deep breath just to prove that he can.

    It wheezes.

    (how the tuna meltdown is averted through the power of food allergies and anaphylaxis)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,169
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    532
    Kudos:
    12,790
    Bookmarks:
    2,864
    Hits:
    96,295

    28 Jul 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    “Uh,” he says, looking up from his screen and feeling his ears go hot, realizing for the first time that this habit of his hasn’t actually come up before until this exact moment.

    “What?” Rozanov asks, sounding more amused than anything else. “You are one of the people who does Instagram for food now?”

    “No,” Shane says, stalling between answering and finishing his Snap so he can send it to Melissa, “one sec.” He finishes typing out 'Tuna melt. Chips. Pickles. It smells really good. Swiss cheese, I think.' before he looks back to Rozanov, putting his phone facedown on the coffee table. “Just sending it to someone on the staff. She likes knowing what I’m eating.”

    He doesn’t know if Melissa likes knowing what he’s eating, per se, but she also seems pleased when he talks about enjoying food for things beyond how many grams of protein it has in it.

    “Ah,” Rozanov says, in a tone Shane can’t quite read. “You always send her your food then, this girl?”

    (shane has a habit of sending his team's dietitian his meals for approval) (the problem with this habit? he forgets to tell ilya exactly what it is that melissa does) (how the tuna meltdown is AVERTED through the power of miscommunication)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,481
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    731
    Kudos:
    12,951
    Bookmarks:
    2,652
    Hits:
    75,268

    27 Jul 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane gets approximately ten minutes of feeling blissful and content after Ilya Rozanov leaves his apartment-

    -and then he has to bolt to the bathroom to get ill with a violence he hasn’t experienced since he was still conditioning for the season as a rookie.

    In the aftermath, he runs a cold washcloth over his face while swishing his mouth out and tries to convince himself that it had to have just been something he ate.

    He wonders if he should text Rozanov and give him a warning, but having to send a, “Thanks for taking my virginity, by the way I just puked my guts up and you might have caught whatever this is from me” doesn’t really seem like it’s a very sexy follow-up text to get from someone. As a “congrats on getting fucked” present to himself in honor of the occasion, he decides he’ll chalk it up to the sudden release of nerves and only send the text if it lasts past the night.

    (shane is EXTREMELY sensitive to nicotine) (the problem with this? he isn't actually aware of it and thus doesn't understand why fucking ilya rozanov sometimes makes him sick afterwards)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,723
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    338
    Kudos:
    6,972
    Bookmarks:
    1,058
    Hits:
    35,729

    25 Jul 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    21,591
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    232

    24 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Incredible amazing can’t even begin to explain

  17. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    They’re alone at the bar now. No one is watching. He could press a finger to Hollander’s lips, wait for Hollander to open for him. He could slide the pad of his thumb across Hollander’s tongue, tip his chin up, and pour the liquid into his mouth. He could watch the bob of Hollander’s throat as he swallows it down.

    Ilya takes a drag from his cigarette instead.

    “What?” Ilya asks as Hollander stares him down, not unlike an enraged bull. “You are going to tell me not to smoke? Is Vegas, Hollander. No one cares.”

    “Neither do I,” Hollander mutters, turning away toward the bar. “Are you going to give my drink back?”

    Ilya glances down at the shot glass in his hand and shrugs. “No. Is mine now.” He throws the shot back, suppressing a wince at the taste of subpar hotel bar vodka. When he looks up again, Hollander is already walking away from him into the sea of brightly colored slot machines.

    --

    After hooking up at the MLH awards, Shane doesn't go back to his room. He goes to a party. Ilya can't help but follow him to the casino where he realizes something is wrong with Shane.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,144
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    108
    Kudos:
    1,424
    Bookmarks:
    223
    Hits:
    8,371

    23 Jul 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

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    Post-cottage, Shane and Ilya quickly discover that hiding sucks, so they launch their friendship via a series of chaotic Instagram Lives. It predictably spirals out of control.

    Ch 1: Friends!
    Ch 2: …Uh, friends?
    Ch 3: Definitely not friends.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,501
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    498
    Kudos:
    11,455
    Bookmarks:
    2,227
    Hits:
    72,329

    23 Jul 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

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    It's not the worst thing Cliff's ever done, by far, but he wouldn't exactly say he's proud of it either. It's surprisingly easy to get the number from Roz's phone, despite it being practically glued to his hand all the time. But 8 shots and 3 beers will do that to a man, Cliff supposes - even a Russian one.

    He's doing this for Roz, and for the team. Sure, the boys had probably been joking when they'd mentioned going "straight to source" to solve The Montreal Jane Problem, but the last 6 weeks had been frankly unbearable. He wasn't sure what exactly Roz had done, but it had to be fixable. They'd been texting for years, for christ's sake. Undoubtedly messy and unconventional, but clearly this Jane was way more important than Roz was willing to admit. Maybe even to himself.

    Maybe that was the problem.
    _________________

    (Or, Cliff starts texting "Jane" before the 2017 All Star Game, and things sort of go from there.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,248
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    221
    Kudos:
    7,180
    Bookmarks:
    1,526
    Hits:
    67,255

    21 Jul 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    alternate ending, 740k, (84,000 words)
    NC17 (everyone's got their version of what happened at the end of the movie; this is mine.) Cover Art by X.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    84,335
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    131
    Kudos:
    2,070
    Bookmarks:
    556
    Hits:
    77,989

    17 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    THE FIC!

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