Chapter Text
Okay, don’t screw it up this time! You got this, I told myself.
This was my sixth attempt and today’s going to be the day for sure.
I took a deep breath. A shinobi’s greatest skill was stealth, and I excelled at it than most Leaf shinobi.
I peeked over the brick wall, watching Kakashi Hatake sit up in a tree, one leg dangling off a branch and the other bent, his free hand resting on top of his knee. His back was against the bark of the tree and he was reading a book. The usual.
My eyes narrowed, and I was thinking of a way to “casually” bump into him when I heard a quiet voice next to my ear.
“What’re you doing?”
I let out a squeal, and before Kakashi could look up this way, I turned and dropped below. I looked up at the person who interrupted my scheming.
He was tall, wearing a long green trench coat with a light dusty mauve scarf wrapped loosely around his neck. His dark sandy hair moved slightly as he tilted his head to the side, and he wore purple makeup, two thick stripes coming down below his eyes to the middle of his cheeks. I almost missed the beauty spot by his chin. A small pack was wrapped around his left shoulder with a strap. Then I noticed the camera around his neck.
I scowled up at him, feeling my cheeks flush from getting caught. “Excuse me?”
The man put his hands in his pockets, raising one eyebrow. “I asked what you were doing?”
I gave him a look. I didn’t see any Leaf ninja headband nor did I recognize him. How in the hell did he sneak up on me if he wasn’t a shinobi?
I pointed to my headband on my arm. “Official shinobi business.” I jerked a thumb over my shoulder, pointing towards the general direction of where Kakashi was sitting. “And it involves that man there. So if you could kindly move on—”
“What man?” He looked over the brick wall, furrowing his eyebrows.
My eyes slightly widened and then I sat up on my knees, turning around to grab the top of the wall and looked. The branch that Kakashi occupied was empty now!
I felt a flush of anger course through my body. I stood up, dusting myself off, glaring up at the man. He looked down at me, almost blinking innocently.
“Now look what you did! You scared him off!” I said, scoffing, and pushing past him. I swear Hatake was like a mouse—one small noise and he disappeared without a trace.
“I scared him off?” the man said, quickly falling into step with me. I frowned, but then started to look around, seeing if I could find any trace of that spiky silver hair.
“Yes,” I said with a roll of my eyes.
“So who is this ‘him’?”
“Kakashi Hatake.”
“Is he a criminal now or something? I thought he was a reputable shinobi.”
I stopped in my tracks and looked up at the stranger. I pursed my lips in a thin line. Who the hell was this guy? “Uh, why do you want to know?”
The man shrugged. “I mean, if I’m going to stay in this village, I think I have a right to know who to avoid.” A small smirk quirked his lips.
I crossed my arms. “It’s classified.”
“Classified, hm?”
“Yes, sir. It’s classified. Now if you’ll excuse m—”
“Let me guess. You’re trying to see what’s underneath his mask too?”
I gave him an incredulous look. “Um, what?”
The man shook his head, sighing. “It won’t work. I ran into a bunch of kids earlier to help them see what the real Kakashi Hatake looks like under his mask, but they failed. And—”
I stopped him, putting a hand up. I rose an eyebrow. “That’s not what I’m doing.”
He blinked down at me. “Oh.”
I made a face before moving on. This guy was weird ... and I’ve met Might Guy. He caught up again. “Then what is it? Maybe I can help you.”
I let out an incredulous laugh, looking over at him. “Why would I want your help? I don’t even know you.”
He stopped and held his camera in his hands. “Fair enough. Well, my name is Sukea. I’m a freelance journalist.” Sukea lifted his camera slightly to emphasize. “I am always looking for the biggest scoops and I feel like my skills would be an asset to whatever your mission is.”
I pursed my lips. I had lied to him and now he was wanting to get involved. I tried to dismiss him again, walking again but he stepped in front of me. “Seriously. If this is as juicy as it sounds, I would love to help out.”
I narrowed my eyes. “But it’s classified.”
Sukea rolled his eyes. “I know you’re lying. I used to be a shinobi too. No real shinobi would go around telling civilians they are on a classified mission.”
My eyes widened. “Oh, uh ...” I closed my eyes, covering my face with one hand. “Listen, dude, I don’t know why you’re getting so invested but it’s a private issue.”
“Hm.”
I looked around and saw a glimpse of Kakashi turning a corner, book still in hand. Finally!
“Gotta go,” I said, looking up at him. I lifted two fingers and disappeared. I reappeared on top of a rooftop, looking down at the heart of the village to see if I could catch him.
It’s now or never. No more hiding! No more pining! I was going to lay my heart out and if he rejected me, well, then, at least I tried. But first I just had to find him …
Dammit! I had lost him! That stupid Sukea! I gritted my teeth. Daylight was quickly diminishing and I was going to lose my chance!
I went back down to the middle of the crowd when I noticed his students. I asked Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura if they’ve seen their sensei and they shook their heads. “Not since we failed miserably to see him without his mask,” Sakura said dejectedly.
Naruto scowled but then lifted a fist. “Don’t worry, Sakura. We will see his face one day, believe it!” Sasuke just rolled his eyes next to him.
“Oh ... well, thanks,” I said lamely.
Sakura’s face brightened as she looked behind me. “Oh, hi, Sukea, sir! I thought you went home earlier today?”
I stiffened as I felt him approach us closer. “Well, it seems like there might be a better story in the works. If only someone would let me in on it.”
I gaped up at him, feeling my eyebrows drawing in with annoyance.
Naruto perked up. “What? Does it have something to do with Kakashi-sensei?”
Sukea tilted his head and then looked at me. “Maybe.”
Naruto looked between me and Sukea. “Oh, wait a second ... Is big sis involved? What is it, big sis? Tell us! Tell us!”
Sasuke crossed his arms, turning his head to look disinterested, but I saw him look at me out of the corner of his eye. Sakura rose her eyebrows, leaning in.
I could kill him. I glowered up at Sukea. “I don’t have any big scoop or whatnot!”
Sukea crossed his arms, a smirk on his lips again. “Didn’t seem like it earlier.”
“Okay, well now I have to know!” Naruto said, grinning mischievously. “Let us help!”
I glanced down at the kids as they were trying not to get too excited. I let out a sigh. Crap. “It’s nothing, you guys. But if you’ll please excuse us!” I grabbed Sukea’s arm, dragging him away. Naruto and Sakura whined behind us.
I glared as I pulled him off the side, away from the kids where they started to walk away. “Okay. Here’s the deal. I meant what I said earlier that this is a private issue. Why did you have to instigate them? They’ll probably blab off to their sensei!” I bit my thumb, now worried Naruto’s big mouth was going to put a wrench in my plans.
“Why would you be worried if their sensei knows something’s up?” Sukea lifted a brow.
Gah, he was so infuriating! And I barely knew him! “Because it’s none of your business!” I snapped at him. “Now just leave me alone!” I vanished on him again, but this time I trudged up some stairs to get to my apartment. I’d have to try again tomorrow.
◙ ◙ ◙
Okay, today was definitely the day.
I had the day off, and talking to the kids earlier this week, I knew Team 7 wouldn’t have a mission until a week from now.
I made sure to look extra cute today. I made small space buns in my hair and curled the rest of my hair that was down. I took my extra time to do my makeup. I tried to think of an outfit and figured a sundress would be a cute moment. Maybe it could come off as flirty? As I looked myself in the mirror, I felt nervous again. Biting my lip, I let my hands fall down at my sides.
First, I would have to find him and I wasn’t going to jump roof to roof since I was wearing a dress. Maybe I should change …?
No, no. This was cute! I was sticking with it! Be confident!
“You are a tigress, dammit!” I said, slapping my cheeks. Then winced before leaning back in the mirror, checking to see if I ruined my makeup.
When I walked out of my apartment, I checked his usual reading spot. Empty. I walked around trying to ask around if anyone’s seen him. I even stopped Shikaku who had Shikamaru in tow and asked if he’s seen him in the Hokage Tower. Nope.
Nope, nope, nope.
Ichiraku Ramen? No.
With his students? Nuh-uh.
Having a friendly competition with Guy? Not today.
I was stumped and I sat on a bench in the park, giving up. I rested my elbows on my thighs and held my head up with my palms, pouting.
Just when I was thinking what a waste of makeup I used today, I heard, “Oi! Kakashi! Where have you been?”
My head whipped around to see Kakashi walking down the park trail towards me. He hadn’t noticed me, looking down at his book. He didn’t even glance up at the person chasing him.
It was Iruka looking irate.
“Kakashi Hatake! I know you can hear me!”
I saw Kakashi heave a sigh before looking up at the sky with an exasperated expression. He turned and Iruka caught up with him.
Now’s my chance! Maybe I can help him get out of this situation he clearly doesn’t want to be! I could just run up to them and call his name, reprimanding he was late and excuse us from Iruka’s rant, who suddenly started to yell.
I hesitated though.
What if I was just trading an annoying situation for another for him? I stood up, taking a deep breath. No.
He would be happy to see me. The last time I saw him, he smiled and called me by my nickname he gave me ... right before patting me on the head like some kid sister.
I wrung my hands around each other and then rolled my shoulders back. Fuck that. I look fucking adorable today and I’m amazing and I can do this.
Then I can ask to talk to him and confess my feelings. And if he rejects me ... well, I didn’t want to think about it. Because he’s not going to reject me.
I pushed away the other thoughts and took a step forward before I lost my nerve.
Then, “Trying again with your little scheme that you won’t let me in on?”
I spun on my heel, my eyes widened.
Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me.
Sukea’s smirk was placed on his face and I wanted to slap it right off. I curled my hands into fists. “What are you doing here?”
He shrugged, picking up his camera in his hands and lifting it up to his eye. “Just trying to find the next big scoop. Would that be you?”
I scowled.
Click.
“Got it. Beautiful. One more for safety?”
When I was about to reach for his stupid camera, I heard Iruka’s voice rise higher than before. I turned around and saw he was pointing towards the direction of the academy, probably telling Kakashi to do something.
Even from this far, I could see him roll his one eye. He waved away Iruka and Iruka just pointed again. That’s when he finally looked our way. It was too late.
All the confidence I had built up for the last five minutes deflated. Kakashi put up a hand, an attempt to say hello. I could only stare, my heart pounding in my chest.
Fear overtook everything. Rejection was terrifying. What if he didn’t look at me like that anymore or ever wave at me again after I confessed?
And just like that, I lost my nerve.
Kakashi had turned away, following Iruka, and I turned around, trying to blink back tears.
Fuck.
Was I really going to start all over now? This is the seventh failed attempt. All my insecurities and frustration bubbled up to the surface and I couldn’t help but feel like I’ve already been rejected. Maybe it was never going to happen.
Sukea was talking but I ignored him. Only when I passed him did he realize the threat of tears wanting to come out. His eyes bugged out and then he caught up to me, grabbing my wrist gently. “Hey. Hey, hey, hey. Whoa, why are you crying?”
I blinked up at him, my eyebrows drawing up, and then I looked over my shoulder. Kakashi was gone. Just like that. Would that have happened if I had said something?
Was it a sign that Sukea interrupted me? It must be the universe telling me to not get my hopes up.
I threw my hands up, just fucking done with it all. “Because apparently the universe never wants me to confess my feelings to my crush! And I thought I was resolute in my decision, but after today, I give up!”
I started to stomp away, wiping away my tears, not sure if they were sad or angry. I held onto myself and then Sukea was by my side in an instant. “That’s what this has been about? You ... You have feelings for Hatake?”
I shot him a glare. “It’s none of your fucking business!”
Sukea still looked incredulous and then grabbed my arm gently to stop me. I almost recoiled but his eyes looked confused. “But ... But look at you.”
I gaped at him. What the fuck did that mean? He didn’t even know me! I felt my face flush and bit my lip. Oh, God. This was a mistake. He said it in such an incredulous tone like he couldn’t believe it—as if someone like me could ever be with the renowned Copycat Ninja. And maybe it was best that I never said anything.
“Oh, wow. Gee, thanks, my confidence is skyrocketing now,” I said, my voice wavering as I tried to make it sound sarcastic. I started to walk faster.
“No, wait! I didn’t—! That’s not what I—!”
But I vanished before he could say anymore.
Fuck Sukea.
And fuck feelings.