Chapter Text
“Where the hell is he?”
“Hey dad, so nice to hear from you. The kids are fine, thanks for asking.” Molly wound the phone cord around her finger while she waited patiently for the multilingual tirade coming through the line to end. She was only half listening. It involved Anthony’s latest list of transgressions; money owed around town, wrecking the car, unsavory rumors about him and some bartender in Harlem. She was half way through compiling a grocery list in her head when he finally paused to take a breath.
“And what’s any of that have to do with me?” She asked calmly, opening the icebox to see if she needed eggs. She was surprised to find there was no eggs, but there was a cheesecake that had not been there when she’d left for work that morning. It looked a bit lopsided and rough around the edges, but definitely edible. She smiled to herself.
“Because that little shit ain’t in the city! Is he there?”
“Thought he wrecked the car? You think he walked from Manhattan to Paterson? Maybe swam up the river?”
“Don’t get cute with me young lady!”
“I can’t help I’m cute.” Molly held the phone away from her ear and rolled her eyes as another tirade, this one mostly in Italian, came through the receiver. “Dad, he ain't here. I ain’t seen him in a year. And I don’t know why you think you can call me now, after making it real clear I ain’t any kinda daughter you want, because you went and lost another one of your kids.”
“Ungrateful whore!”
“Good talk dad. Love you.” Molly put the phone down on the receiver and let out a long sigh, counting to ten as she exhaled. She’d walked in the house to the phone ringing, hadn’t even put her purse down. She took off her coat and laid it on the back of a kitchen chair. She kicked off her shoes, sending them under the table. Now that she didn’t have her father screaming at her from across the Hudson, her ears perked to the sound of music. She chuckled to herself and followed it.
she put her ear to the basement door, then opening it slowly.
“I went to lose a jolly, hour on the trolley and lost my heart instead!”
Biting her lip to keep from laughing, she tiptoed down the steps and crouched, watching the scene below, trying to stay out of sight. Her brother was singing along to the record playing while her kids, Josephine and Emil, were dancing along. They had clearly gotten into her hats and jewelry at some point during their day together. Anthony was proudly wearing a pink pill box hat and black feather boa, moving his hips as he sang and danced with a joyful comfort that lit up the room. Josephine, her youngest, had on a wide brimmed easter hat that covered nearly her entire face. She also had about half a dozen necklaces dangling and jingling as she danced. Emil, who was six, had on a gray fedora with a matching bow tie and suit jacket that hung to his knees. Molly recognized it as what Anthony had come in wearing the night before. When he’d appeared seemingly out of nowhere on her front porch.
“He tipped his hat, and took a seat,
He said he hoped he hadn’t stepped upon my feet!
He asked my name,
I held my breath
I couldn’t speak because he scared me half to death!”
Anthony’s voice belted out as the kids acted out the lyrics, dancing and twirling each other dramatically. Judging from the level of skill she didn’t remember seeing in them before today, Molly guessed that they had been practicing this for a while.
The kids had been so happy to see their uncle, she’d kept quiet when he’d told them he was “just in the Neighborhood and wanted to surprise them.”
“You in trouble again?” She’d whispered to him, after he’d read the kids a bedtime story and she’d handed him a drink.
“I am the trouble.” He’d told her with a playful wink. “Nothing you need to worry about.” She’d scowled at him but left it. He looked thin and strung out, much older than he had a year ago. Gray was beginning to salt his black hair. “Just, uh, if pop calls…”
“I ain’t never heard of you. Got it.”
“Love you sis.” She’d hoped to talk to him more, but she’d barely made up the couch for him before he passed out.
“...And as if it were planned he stayed on with me
and it was grand just to stand with his hand holding mine!
Till the end of the line!”
Anthony raised his hands theatrically as he belted Judy Garland’s last lines, easily outshining the record. Molly tried to remember the last time she’d heard him sing like that and realized it had been her wedding. The wedding had been much better than the marriage that followed.
When the note ended Molly whistled and applauded loudly. Anthony jumped and nearly fell backwards, which just made her laugh and clap harder. Emil and Josephine didn’t seem to notice, instantly running towards their mother, babbling enthusiastically.
“Uncle Ant taught us how to foxtrot!”
“And how to do a swing twirl!”
“And he made Pancakes for lunch!”
“And he taught us how to make Nona’s cheesecake!”
“He said we weren’t allowed to eat it until you got home.”
“Can we eat it now!”
Molly laughed and hugged them both, coming the rest of the way down the stairs and squatting down to their level.
“We have to have dinner first.” She told them, forever the bearer of bad news. She looked up at Anthony, who had pulled off the hat and boa and was blushing furiously.
“You all look so fancy! Now if I were to go into my bedroom, what do you all think I would find?” The looks on all three of their faces told her everything she needed to know about the state of her closet and bedroom after their costumed dance party. “Go put everything back where you found it please. I need to talk to Uncle Ant.”
“Okay Mama!” They trotted up the stairs, singing “Meet Me in St. Louis” as they went. Molly stood and walked over to her brother, who was holding the boa and hat in his hand, looking embarrassed.
“What’s with your face? You look good. Looks better on you then me. You sound good too.” She pulled the hat from his hand and put it back on his head. He chuckled.
“Jay wanted to play dress up.” He told her. Molly raised an eyebrow.
“You always blame it on the five year old?”
“If I can get away with it.” She hugged him tight.
“Daddy’s looking for you. Sounds like you really fucked up this time.” She said, and felt him tense.
“You didn’t…”
“Naw, fuck him. Told him I hadn’t seen you. He wants to disown me for divorcing that piece of shit I didn’t want to marry in the first place, that’s fine, but he’s out of his mind thinking I owe him shit. I’m worried about you though.” Anthony moved away from her and pulled the needle off the record. He flashed her a smile.
“Come on, you know me, I always make it out okay. You don’t gotta worry. I’ll get outta your hair though. Tell the kids goodbye for me?”
“Tell um yourself. After dinner.” She pulled a record off the shelf and replaced the soundtrack with Duke Ellington.
“No, If dad stops drinking long enough to come out here looking for me…I don’t want to cause you any trouble. Besides, I’m getting out. Going west. I met this cat up in Harlem. He’s driving out to Vegas tonight. Said he’d take me with him. Fresh start. I just came to see you and the kids. Say good bye.” Molly crossed her arms and looked at him.
“You’re driving across the country with some guy you just met?”
“Ain’t like that. He’s been all over. Wants to open up a casino out there. Asked me to be his partner.”
What, you in love or something?” She said it half as a joke, but he shot her a look full of daggers.
“No! He’s just got a car and is going as far away from here as I can get. Ain’t nothing!”
“Ant, you may be able to fool mama with your shitty lying but I ain’t her. I knew you’d been actin’ twitterpated.” Anthony blushed and then was mad at himself for blushing. He looked down at his feet.
“I just. I just need to get out. I’m tired of it. Feel like I can’t breathe.”
“Yeah, I know the feeling.” She took his hands and squeezed them. Something caught her eye and she turned his arm around and lifted the sleeve of his shirt slightly before he realized what she was doing.
“Anthony!” He pulled away from her and shook the sleeve back down to cover the marks. “Seriously?”
“It was just a couple of times! I’m done with it. Hank doesn’t do any of that shit. That’s part of why I’m going with him. Flying straight from now on! Scouts honor.” He raised three fingers and gave her a goofy smile. For a second he looked so much like he had when they were kids. That kind charisma where you were both sure he was up to something and could do no wrong. She’d hoped, when he showed up, that maybe he’d come to stay. She’d missed him so much.
But Molly knew it was only a matter of time before he got dragged right back into it. Maybe this was his chance.
“You need a ride somewhere?” She asked. He shook his head.
“No, I can walk to the train station. Enjoy the cheesecake. Probably ain’t as good as ma’s, but the kids are pretty good bakers.”
“Say goodbye to them before you leave.” She said in a voice that wasn’t asking. He nodded and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
“I’ll call you when I get settled out there, or send you a postcard. You and the kids can come out. Stay as long as you want. Hell, I can probably get you a job. Be a regular family of cowboys.” She chuckled. They both pretended to ignore the tears in her eyes.
“Yeah. Regular cowboys.”
*********
Molly woke up with a gasp, her eyes wet with tears. Why was she crying? Why was she sad?
She wiped at her eyes furiously with the sleeve of her pink night shirt. The dream was still vivid in her mind. She couldn’t remember ever having a dream like that. A dream that made her feel sad. Not since coming to heaven anyway.
She’d dreamed about her kids before, still alive with kids and grandkids of their own. She assumed they’d be with her soon, but there wasn’t any rush to it.
She forced her mind to focus on the image of the other man, already trying to fade the way dreams tended to do. Tall and thin, dark hair like hers had once been. That smile. Thinking about the smile made her smile. Thinking about the music and watching them all dance together.
She suddenly knew that was the last time she’d ever seen him. She knew that it wasn’t a dream.
“Anthony.” She said aloud, the tears continuing to come. Her brother. How could she have forgotten her twin brother? Her best friend? The one who was supposed to be waiting for her?
She climbed out of bed and began to pace around the room, thinking. Things had gotten weird in the last month. Ever since Charlie Morningstar and the Fallen Angel had come up and the truth about the exorcists had leaked. Where as before the days had flown in a pleasant haze of harmony, now there was a sharpness that hadn’t been there before. Most angels didn’t want to talk about it, were content to continue on like nothing had changed, but there were whispers of questions. Discord. Doubt.
An image suddenly popped into Molly’s mind. Something she’d seen a few weeks ago, but put out of her mind. She grabbed her phone off the nightstand and began scrolling through. The leaked video of the trial that had circulated like wildfire. Most copies of the video had conveniently disappeared from the Heaven-net, but she had taken a screenshot. She couldn’t explain why she’d done it, her fingers desperate to save the picture. Maybe because she thought he didn’t look like a demon. Not what she’d thought a demon should look like. He had looked kind of like her. She’d thought it weird, unsettling even, but the thought had left her head as quickly as it had come. But not so quickly that she still didn’t have the picture saved in her phone.
“Angel Dust.” She said aloud, remembering that he had been the sinner on trial. She looked at the picture. Him sitting at a bar, wearing a silly sideways smile. Pink suit the same shade as that hat she’d caught her brother wearing so long ago.
She knew it was late, and Emily was probably asleep, but she thought if she couldn’t talk to someone she would explode. And Emily had been there.
Molly started getting dressed while the phone rang. After the third ring the seraphim picked up.
“Hello?”
“Hi Emily, I’m sorry to call so late but I really need to talk to you!”
“Um, this is maybe not a great time. I’ve got kind of a situation over here.”
“Oh.” Molly turned her head to the side, hearing the panic in her usually cheerful voice. “Are you okay?”
“Yes, um I think so? I’ve kind of got a house guest. Sera told me not to tell anyone about it yet because it’s kind of a big deal so I really shouldn’t tell you but also I really want to tell someone so maybe if you promise…”
“I’m on my way over.”