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The Justice League meeting is painfully boring but faster than usual. None of the heroes dare complain, if Batman were to stop reciting the monthly overview to lecture whoever dared to speak up, the meeting would be ten times longer and none of them would make it out alive.
Heroes of America, of Earth, of the Universe, defeated by Batman's boring meetings.
Maybe that’s pathetic, but Hal wants to get out of here as fast as possible and he thinks anyone who would ever step foot in this room, during a meeting, would understand.
Hal sits opposite the Trinity with Batman in the middle, Wonder Woman to the left of him, and Superman to his right. The Flash sits to the left of Hal, his leg shaking so fast he can hardly see it, Hawkwoman sits left of him with Martian Manhunter in between her and Wonder Woman. Cyborg, the newest member (originally a part of the Titans, possibly still a part, Hal doesn't really know the ongoings of the other teams on Earth), sits to the left of Superman, trying to discretely mess with the screen on his arm below the table, with Aquaman to his left, definitely asleep, leaving Green Arrow between him and Hal.
Hal is zoning out, staring roughly in the Bat's direction, when his eye catches on Spooky's shadow. Just for a minuscule second, it looks as if it's a separate entity. He shivers at the thought and blocks it from his memory. Spooky does not need any more factors to make him spookier, he decides.
Then, Superman speaks up, having looked vaguely worried for the majority of the meeting, "Batma-" and immediately gets cut off by Hal and Barry's synchronized groan.
Everyone stops to stare at them. Hal almost cries. Neither offers any explanation as their heads sink to hit the table. Hal will spend the rest of the meeting in the puddle of his tears.
Batman, seemingly unamused by their antics, gestures for Superman, who looks increasingly flustered, to continue. Superman clears his throat before he continues, "I- Uh-, I mean, I'm sure you know and I'm not in any way doubting your abilities or anything!" He scrambles to find the right words as his voice wavers. This piques Hal's interest, he lifts his head just enough to watch the interaction. It seems even invincibility won't save you from Batman's terrifying-ness.
Batman, however, looks as though, somehow, his frown is deepening, "Spit it out." Hal doesn't even know if he means to sound so mean considering Supes looks like a kicked puppy. There’s no way Batman can be immune to that effect. Batman has to like puppies… right?
Superman coughs before he takes a small breath, "Theressomeonebehindyou," and he immediately flinches.
Most of the table seems to stiffen at his words other than Batman himself, Diana who looks smug, and Martian Manhunter who- also looks a little smug. Huh. That's new.
The whole table looks at Batman and watches as his shadow- separates itself????
Hal watches with a loose jaw, as the shadow steps into the light. It wears a suit, not too dissimilar to Batman's, with a similar cape and stitching around the mouth part of the face.
Did Batman just go through mitosis?
Batman has claimed he was human before, now, Hal thinks he was lying.
The shadow waves excitedly while the Bat doesn't even twitch in its direction.
What the fuck.
"This is Batgirl, she came with me today to test your observation skills," Hal groans again and goes limp. He glares at Barry for not doing the same, but as he watches him he's unsure if Barry is conscious. Hal snorts at his expression and kicks him under the table which startles him back to the land of the living. Batman continues, "You always complain about meetings being boring, I thought this would spice this one up."
Hal jerks up indignant, but he continues, "All of you, excluding Martian Manhunter and Wonder Woman, in some way, noticed her presence, but chose to ignore it. I appreciate you taking your time to understand if she was truly a threat," he’s going to say however, "however," called it. "if she were, she would've had many opportunities to disarm and defeat me and/or others."
Hal cuts into his likely long as fuck assessment to defend himself, “Dude, I’m not even completely sure you’re human, how am I supposed to believe your shadow doesn’t just do that!”
Batman looks, honestly, confused, “I assure you, I am human,”
“Humans can’t just do the things you do!” Hal argues, “I wouldn’t be surprised if you were a demon reformed,” He crosses his arms and slumps into his chair. He is most definitely not pouting.
‘Batgirl’ (seriously is there a Batboy too? Batwoman?? ) giggles. It’s barely audible but loud enough to be unsettling.
Batman opens his mouth to speak, but Batgirl waves her hand near Spooky to get his attention and he turns to her. Her hands make intentional movements, clearly a form of sign language, however, Hal doesn’t recognize any of the signs as being ASL. He shouldn’t be surprised Batman has his own sign language. It’s probably called BISL, Batman Incorporated Sign Language. Hal internally snorts.
There’s a micro-expression on Batman’s face as she signs to him that Hal doesn’t recognize. He slumps further into his chair. He thought he was getting good at reading him.
Batman turns to the table, “You all are… intimidated by me?”
Many of the league’s faces clearly express their shock. He didn’t know? He wasn’t like that on purpose?!
Green Arrow speaks up first, “Isn’t that your whole shtick? Are you saying that’s not on purpose?!”
“I am purposely intimidating to Gotham criminals, but many of you out-power me by bounds,” He pauses as if it’s difficult it imagine, “Somehow, you are still afraid… of me?”
“You do have contingencies for all of us, you can win if you do choose to go against us, it’s kind of hard to not be at least a little scared,” Hawkwoman explains.
Flash adds on to her as if he can’t physically hold in the words any longer, like they’re spilling out of him, “And you, like, never talk to us unless it’s necessary! You’re always just silently looming during team bonding. You sneak up on us all the time too! You’re always hiding in the shadows so we never see you and you’re so silent and light on your feet, despite how huge you are, that Superman can’t even hear you sometimes!” Superman blushes at the acknowledgment, “You’re crazy smart, crazy strong, and you come from Gotham! That makes you inherently crazy!”
Batgirl quietly agrees, saying ‘true’ , as Batman stares without moving, trying to comprehend his words.
“I am not too familiar with human customs, but I believe that many of your actions and mannerisms seem inhuman to most,” Martian Manhunter states, as if that is new information. It seems like it is for Batman, as crazy as it sounds, “If it is any consolation, I believe neither Wonder Woman nor I find you ‘creepy’.”
“I’m only slightly afraid of you, Nightwing has countless embarrassing stories, it kinda negates your effect, man,” Cyborg says, finally looking up from his arm screen.
Diana poorly covers up her silent laugh with her hand with Batgirl behind her (when did she get there?!), miming the action.
“Wait, who is Nightwing and where can I get these stories?!” Hal asks, sullen mood forgotten.
“Dude, you don’t know him? W- Kid Flash talks about him all the time! He’s been a part of a lot of teams too! He’s even helped us!” Barry looks appalled that Hal doesn’t know.
“Excuse me for not knowing every superhero on Earth. Do you know how many Lanterns I know? I could name, like, 100 off the top of my head and I need to know every vaguely popular Earth hero too?! I only have so much brain, man!” Hal argues.
Batgirl grabs everyone’s attention by speaking up, “Nightwing is very strong, flexible, and wears a black suit with a blue bird,” She points to her chest, at the bat symbol, “Like this,”
“That does sound familiar now that you say it,”
Hal is searching through his memories as she nods and continues, “Very funny and kind-hearted, others have made connections to Spider-Man,” She laughs a little.
Batman clears his throat and the room stands at attention, Batgirl swiftly appearing at his side, “The meeting can conclude as I can see we are not going to get anywhere, Wonder Woman, I commend your swift confrontation with Batgirl, noticing before the meeting started was beyond my expectations considering Batgirl’s skill.” Hal does not pout again, he is a grown man- “For the rest of you, I apologize for the fear I have inadvertently caused you, enough to ignore a possible threat, I will try to absolve this in the near future.”
Batman stands, going to leave the room with Batgirl not missing a beat and following him. As they walk away Batgirl says, quiet, but intentionally loud enough so the rest of the League can hear, “Your friends are funny,”
Batman nods in response as they make their way to the zeta-tubes.
“Did Spooky just acknowledge that we’re friends?!” Hal shrieks, startling Aquaman awake.
Hal thinks he sees Superman shed a tear.