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Pangi isn’t new to grief.
He isn’t.
But there’s just something…different this time. Different, in the way that he and Aimsey stare down at the grave. Different, in the way that Aimsey leaves, crushed by their grief.
Different, in the way that Pangi is the person who stays, the person who has enough strength to say goodbye. He’s never had that particular strength before. Not with Pili. Not with any of the people he’s lost.
He’s not mad that Bad killed Ros. He can’t bring himself to be. He knows what it's like to want to die, and he knows what it’s like to be freed.
Of course, the difference there is that Pangi found something- someone - to live for. He’s pretty sure that Ros was long past living for herself, and she never wanted to live for Aimsey.
She wanted to die for Aimsey.
The sun is warm on Pangi’s back. For once, it isn’t fucking raining. It isn’t fucking raining.
Pangi takes a step away from Ros’s grave. Then another. Then another. He should find Aimsey. There’s nothing that he can do for Ros anymore. Grabbing his elytra, Pangi launches himself into the sky. The wind is cool on his face, and he can almost pretend that this is all a normal day.
He’s just flying to the castle to see someone. Anyone. Anyone but Ros.
Pangi lands on the ledge of Ros’s window. He ducks through the opening and tucks away his elytra. Sure enough, Aimsey is there.
Pangi moves to stand beside Aimsey, who stands in the center of the room. Once filled with trinkets and dogs and laughter-
It’s now empty. Lost.
Just like its owner.
“Pangi I-” Aimsey’s voice breaks.
He pulls them into a hug. And it takes a moment- but they return it.
The two of them cling to each other with a certain kind of desperation. The kind of desperation that comes when it feels like you’re the only two left. Clambering and stumbling through the wreckage of a bomb.
“What do I do without her, Pangi?” Aimsey shakes in his arms.
“What do I fucking do?”
Pangi exhales shakily, willing himself not to cry, not to break, not in front of Aimsey.
He fails.
Tears drip down his face as he struggles to respond. Because he might not have been the best friend to Ros- but he was a friend.
He thinks that he’s finally started to learn how much that means.
Pangi slowly sinks to the ground, bringing Aimsey with him. They collide, and Aimsey’s head slumps onto his shoulder. What do you do? When all is lost and you’re left behind?
Pangi never responds to Aimsey’s question.
Maybe that’s because he doesn’t know the answer.
It hurts. It hurts so bad. He wishes that he could help Aimsey. He wishes that someone could help him.
Night begins to fall, but Pangi and Aimsey don't sleep. They just sit, grieving a person who they thought that they had let go.
But hey-
Skulk and corruption pulse, glowing in the dark room.
-maybe they’ll see her in the afterlife.