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Zuko was twelve when he learned he was getting a sibling.
Old enough to know why a sibling was required both for the Royal Family and his family specifically. With how many assassination attempts there were, it was best to have two heirs in case one passed away. To Zuko’s knowledge, his uncle was the first Royal Prince in decades to only have one heir. When Lu Ten died, Ozai had been clear to tell Zuko that Iroh’s own stupidity had now left him with no heir.
“He put all his chicken-pig eggs into one basket and now he has nothing.”
Zuko was ten when his cousin died. Old enough to know not to talk back to his father, but not old enough to know a simple question,
“Then why am I an only child?”
Was included in talking back.
He went to bed that night with a stinging feeling in his cheek.
Two years later, after his grandfather had passed away and his uncle disappeared, Zuko stood next to his mom as she announced to the city that she was pregnant with a future heir to the throne or, at least, a potential heir. This played into why his family specifically required a sibling: Zuko was not a good bender. He knew this because Ozai said it again and again and again. Throughout the pregnancy, his father never spoke about how this was a good thing because it would ensure their bloodline would continue. Instead, it was good because, if the baby was strong, they could replace Zuko.
Despite his father’s words, Zuko couldn’t find it within himself to hate the incoming baby. He naturally spent more time around his mother and her words left him feeling nothing but excitement for the baby. She told him how the little one would follow Zuko around and love him and copy his actions. How they would hug his leg and want to do things with him simply because they would like spending time with him. He couldn’t help it. The idea of a sibling sounded really fun when his mom explained it.
Then the day of the birth came.
Zuko was thirteen and, therefore, not allowed anywhere near the medical wing while Ursa was giving birth. Only the husband and any children above sixteen were allowed near the expecting mother in order to ensure there were no mistakes. Hours went by and Zuko could only groan and stare at the wall. Nothing interested him, nothing captured his attention long enough to distract him from the fact that his little sibling was being born. The hours that went by felt almost like years, especially when, any time the sound of footsteps sounded outside his door, Zuko prepared himself for the door to open and someone to say he could come see his mom and sibling. It was never for him.
The baby was officially born at high noon. A good sign for strong firebenders. What wasn’t a good sign was the amount of screaming and rushing that was going on in the medical wing.
Seven hours passed after Ursa went into labor. Finally, Ozai went to Zuko’s room and opened the door. The young prince was lying on his bed when Ozai opened the door and stared at him with a blank expression. In the moment, Zuko was positive, without a seed of doubt, that he saw red in his father’s eyes and tear marks on his cheeks. He never spoke of it though.
“Your mother is dead.” He reported, “You have a little sister: Azula. She’ll be kept in the nursery under the care of a wet nurse and nanny until further notice.”
The words didn’t hit Zuko enough for a proper reaction—that would come later when he woke up in the middle of the night and sobbed and screamed so loudly that even the guards outside had to step away. Instead, Zuko nodded, unable to make a sound. Having received a reaction, Ozai left the room, leaving Zuko to fall back against the bed and stare at the ceiling.
One week later, Zuko finally ventured to the nursery and saw Azula. He broke down hard that day.
She looked just like their mother even with baby fat covering her face.
Two weeks later, Zuko was banished.
Three weeks later, Zuko was quietly asking his uncle if he could take the baby with them. He knew what Ozai did and he knew what Azula had done. She had shown no firebending skill yet, nothing that could be seen at least, and he had heard Ozai growing impatient with the Fire Sages and their lack of an answer about if Azula would or would not even be a firebender. Whether in anger or not, he heard his father threaten that if Azula was not a confirmed bender by the end of her second month then he would label her an orphan and send her to the colonies.
(Zuko couldn’t lose Azula too.)
Four weeks later, Zuko boarded a small ship—one his Uncle had gotten him to find the Avatar—with a four week old infant in his arms.
—-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Babies cry.
A lot.
They also sleep.
A lot.
If Zuko was asked, those were the two things that Azula did the most. She slept and she cried. He hadn’t quite figured out what all her cries meant yet, but he had learned how to run through a check list whenever Azula did cry: food, comfort, too cold or too hot, diaper, or too much going on. If he made it through the check list and nothing had stopped her from crying then he went to Iroh asked.
During one of their first stops before hitting the Air Temple, Iroh had left the ship to go shopping—Zuko assumed for supplies, only for him to return with a baby carrier that would allow Zuko to hold Azula on his back.
“Why would I need this?” Zuko asked.
“Maybe not right now, but, trust me, your arms will thank you when you don’t have to carry her around everywhere.” He promised, “How has the little one been doing?”
“She’s okay. He’s handling the milk substitute well.” There was no thank you to Iroh for getting it for her but the words were still there, “She doesn’t like when the boat hits rough water.” They hadn’t been sailing long but one night they hit a bad case of waves and Azula could not settle down no matter what Zuko did.
“You could put her in my room when we reach bad weather. I can take her so that you can rest.” Iroh offered.
“She’s my sister. I can handle her.”
“I never said you couldn’t.” Iroh argued, “I’m only saying that Azula, like all babies, needs a lot of attention and care. It’s unfair to put all of that onto another child.”
Zuko glared at his uncle. He didn’t need him or anyone else saying he was unequipped to raise Azula. He already heard the whispers from the crew and saw the looks from villagers when they arrived in various ports. He knew what people thought and he refused to let their stares and whispers influence him. The idea of keeping Azula with him had been easier than the reality of it, he could admit to that, but that didn’t mean he needed to hear someone, every two seconds, asking if he was okay and saying they could take the baby and telling him he was doing something wrong.
“I’m going back to my room.” Zuko told him, “Azula should be waking up soon.” She liked to be out on the hull when it was nice out. If the sun was still out, he could take her up and let her feel the warm air.
“Zuko, I didn’t mean any disrespect.” Iroh placed a hand on Zuko’s shoulder, stopping him in his place, “I only want to help.”
“I don’t need your help.” He snared.
It was only five minutes after Zuko left that Iroh realized he had left the room with the baby carrier. If Iroh spotted Zuko in his room trying to figure out how to get it on and get Azula inside, he never spoke a word about it.
—------------------------------------------------
WAHHHHHH!!!!!!
Their ship had left the dock two hours ago after they collected the information they needed. The Avatar wasn’t at the Western Air Temple or the Northern. Their next stop was the Eastern Temple and then they’d head to the South. Ziko had a very clear plan laid out in his head of checking the temples, the tribes then the Earth Kingdom. If the Avatar couldn’t be found after that, he would think over their next move but, for now, it was all about checking the Air Temples.
When they left, Zuko was down in his room, looking over the map and circling location as to where the Avatar could be while Azula was sleeping peacefully in her crib. When the ship started moving again, Zuko expected Azula to wake up and scream. Thankfully, she did not and he took it as a sign to keep working.
That soon turned premature as she began screaming her head off not ten minutes later. Zuko brought her to the hull, hoping the sun and fresh air would calm her but nothing worked. She continued to scream and wail as loudly as her little lungs would let her. No matter what Zuko tried to bribe her with—milk, toys, blankets, the sun—none of it was enough to get her to calm down. Finally, Zuko was starting to get far too tired and he could tell by the crew’s expressions that they were getting tired as well.
“Prince Zuko, “ Lieutenant Jee stepped forward with his arms starting to open, “could I try something….please.”
“What could you possibly know about soothing a sobbing child?” Zuko asked.
“I have nephews.” He said, “Let me try.”
Reluctantly, Zuko handed his sister to the lieutenant. Jee adjusted Azula in his arms and began to heat his hands. No where near hot enough to actually hurt Azula but enough to provide a nice warm heat on her back and legs.
All Zuko saw was Jee’s hands gaining heat and Azula.
“What do you think you’re doing!?” Zuko demanded. Every crew member on the deck could tell he was doing fast calculations in his head to see if there was a way to punch Jee without hurting Azula.
“Wait! Just listen.”
He did listen.
And he heard nothing.
Azula wasn’t crying anymore.
“How did you do that?”
“A trick I learned. Babies sometimes just need warmth and comfort. The tiniest amount of bending provides them with a calming feeling that usually puts them right out.” His words seemed to be correct because Azula was smiling and cooing in Jee’s arms, “There we go. You were just a little cold, huh, princess? Weren’t you?” Azula wasn’t old enough to giggle yet but her smile was as wide as it could be.
Zuko pushed down his anger at seeing someone else so easily care for Azula. She was happy and she was smiling. That was what mattered more than his own feelings. That’s what his mother would think if she was here and that thought was the only thing keeping Zuko from snatching Azula out of Jee’s hands that very second.
As the day bled into night, Azula quickly became a favorite on the ship. For the majority of time that she had been there, she’d mainly been in Zuko’s room. He handled feeding her, keeping her clean, playing with her and only brought her out if he deemed it necessary and that was usually only when the sun was particularly strong on a certain day and he wanted Azula to absorb the warmth. Plus, it was recommended that firebender babies get proper time in the sun to help their bending grow and, despite the Fire Sages not being able to prove Azula was a bender, Zuko truly thought she was.
Most of the sailors on the ships had families. They either had children of their own who were long since grown or, like Jee, had nieces and nephews so they knew how to take care of a baby. One of them had gone and gotten two large blankets to set out on the wood so Azula could play. They called it tummy time, telling Zuko it was very important that, at two months old, Azula get at least half an hour a day. Azula wasn’t a huge fan of the experience, whining and wiggling while the others just stared at her.
“You’re sure she’s okay?”
“She’s fine.” An older female sailor named Keiko told him, “My youngest hated tummy time with a vengeance, but his neck, shoulders and arms thanked me for it.”
“Uh!” Azula whined. She was unable to crawl or really move at all but her face was expressive enough to get across her feelings.
“Sorry, Zula.” Zuko knelt himself down until he was on his knees and ran a hand on what little hair she had. Azula attempted to grab at his hand but fell onto the blanket with a tiny plop, “Are you trying to grab my hand?”
“UH!”
“Here.” He set his hand down in front of her own, smiling when Azula grabbed his finger with as much strength as she possibly could, “Strong little baby.”
“You’re good with her.” Keiko told him, “Better than some parents I know.”
Zuko’s good eye widened. He clearly hadn’t been expecting any of his crew to compliment him, “She’s my sister. She deserves….care.” His lack of the word ‘love’ didn’t escape Keiko, but she chose to ignore it, “I just hope I’ll be back at the palace before she's old enough to ever remember being out here.” That comment sent a hush over the crew.
“I hope so too.” Keiko finally managed to get the words out after more than a few seconds of silence, “It’s getting a little cold for her. It might be a good idea to bring her back to your room, Prince Zuko.” Zuko didn’t say a word when he reached for her and scooped up the infant. Although he hadn’t said anything, he heard the silence in his crew as much as they had. The silent belief that Azula would more than remember her time on the boat, that he had doomed his sister to a life where she would never go home.
—------------------------------------------------
“Zuko please.”
The freezing winds from the high altitude left Zuko more than a little upset. As a firebender, he was used to using his internal flame to heat himself—-although it wasn’t much more than a light fire—but even an internal flame wasn’t all that helpful against the Southern Air Temples in the winter. Most of the crew was okay. The few who weren’t firebenders had heavy coats to keep themselves warm and they only complained about the cold to one another as opposed to Zuko. At the moment, the person who was complaining the most was Azula.
At four months, Azula was strapped to Zuko’s back in the baby carrier Iroh had purchased which Zuko stuffed with warm fur before they left the ship to keep her warm. The Southern Air Temple wasn’t the biggest temple by any means—-that honor belonged to the west and east—-but it was hidden. It was the only temple with hidden rooms where it would take days to go through any of them. To save on time, Zuko brought the whole crew and that included bringing along Azula, who was not a fan of the high altitude or the cold wind on her face.
“Azula will be okay once we reach the temple.” Zuko snapped, “She’s just upset from the walking.”
“She’s upset because she’s too high up. She’s too young for this.” Iroh argued.
“Air Nomads had babies at higher altitudes than this all the time.”
“Azula isn’t an airbender!” Iroh snapped.
For a moment, Zuko froze. He’d heard his uncle snap before but it was never directed at him, “Uncle, she’s—”
“No, Zuko.” Iroh’s voice didn’t calm. If anything, it grew stronger, “Azula cannot be up at this level. I know you think you can raise Azula all on your own but if you continue to hurt her like this then I will remove her. A four month old doesn’t deserve to have her crying ignored.”
“I’m not hurting her!” By now the crew had stopped and turned towards the sounds of the shouting family. Azula continued to scream, her little hands curling into fists and tears rolling down her face, “I know what I’m–”
Zuko was cut off by the feeling of Azula’s tiny fist hitting his neck. He maneuvered just enough that he could finally see Azula’s face. Her little nose and cheeks were red from the cold and there were clear tear tracks down her face that went all the way down her face. On occasion, seeing Zuko’s face was enough to get her to stop crying or at least quiet down but even the transfer from being on Zuko’s back to being in his arms didn’t calm her even a little. Her screams only seemed to grow in fact.
The crew didn’t dare to move. They just looked between Zuko and Iroh, wondering what would happen next. Iroh was slowly growing antsy but he didn’t seem like he wanted to grab Azula unless given no other choice. Zuko wasn’t moving to hand over Azula but he also wasn’t holding her away from Iroh. An air of uncomfortable silence—save Azula’s screams—took hold of the group. It wasn’t obvious but there was an understanding that something was about to happen in the next few seconds.
“Take her.” Zuko whispered.
“Zuko—”
“Take her!” Zuko pushed Azula into Iroh’s arms, not enough to hurt her but enough that Iroh felt the push, “Before I hurt her more.”
“Zuko, you’re not—”
“I have to keep searching. Bring her down to the ship where she can warm up.”
“Alright, I’ll prepare some komodo chicken for your return.” Azula wasn’t ready for solids yet but she did smile and wiggle whenever she smelled the food. The crew had a sneaking suspicion that when Azula was ready for solids, she would tolerate nothing that wasn’t komodo chicken, “Azula will be happy to see you when you return.”
Zuko took the opportunity to spare a file look as Iroh began back towards the ship. When they left, Azula was still crying but Zuko could swear he saw the infant reaching for him as opposed to just crying without aim. Almost like her reason for crying had shifted from being upset at the cold to not wanting to be separated from him.
“You’ll be back on the ship and get to see her soon.” Keiko promised.
Although he responded with his regular gruff voice, “I’m fine,” Zuko did smile at her just a little when he passed by her. A small way to thank her without having to say the words, “What are you all doing?! Keep walking to the temple!”
—------------------------------------------------
In order to pass through Earth Kingdom waters, you had to make a deal with pirates. It certainly wasn’t everywhere in the Earth Kingdom, but pirates were common enough that it was better to work with them rather than against. Flying a pirate flag was certainly not something Zuko wanted to do but if it meant being able to sail without fear of being attacked then he was willing to swallow his pride. For now, his crew was meeting with one of the strongest pirate crews, under the command of a Captain Hui, to discuss being able to sail through pirate controlled waters.
“I’m telling you, kid, you’re not getting a better deal than this.”
Captain Hui’s “deal” was for Zuko to cough up 500 gold pieces and never rob from any Earth Kingdom coastal towns—apparently the pirates didn’t need the competition—, in exchange for being given the pirate flag that told other crews Zuko had made an alliance with Hui. It was no guarantee that he’d be left alone but it did greatly increase his chances of sailing without any problems.
“You realize you’re making a deal with Fire Nation royalty—”
“And the day I care about that, I’ll let you know.” Hui smirked, “As far as I care, you’re just some exiled brat with deep pockets and I would like to have my fair share of what is in those pockets in exchange for safe passage.”
“Safe passage you can’t guarantee.”
“Nothing in this world is guaranteed, but what I can tell you is that I’m getting annoyed with this conversation.” Hui leaned back in his chair and grinned enough to give Zuko a view of the captain’s teeth that he was sure hadn’t been cleaned in ages, “So, do we have a deal? Or no?”
Zuko looked down at the table and back at his uncle. He had been clear about wanting to conduct this meeting on his own. It was expected of a future Fire Lord to be able to handle himself with anyone. That didn’t stop Zuko from being worried though that he was missing something—an angle or something he hadn’t considered. If anyone would be able to catch that, it would be Iroh. His uncle caught his look because he cleared his throat to speak but he was cut off by Hui laughing.
“Who is this?” On the floor was Azula, grabbing at the pirate’s coat most likely to try and chew on it. She was eight months old at this point and crawling was officially her favorite pastime, “One of your crewmates bring their kid?” Hui asked, picking Azula up off the floor.
“Azula is my sister.” Zuko explained, “Put her—”
“Sister? Well, the Fire Lord has a second kid, didn’t know that. She a bender?” He asked.
“Yes.” Had Azula shown any bending skill beyond sneezing smoke? No, but Hui didn’t need to know that.
“Wow. Another bender in the family. Are you going to be a little firebending princess?” Hui laughed, letting Azula be slightly tossed around in his arms. Nothing that actually hurt her but he did move her around enough that she was starting to whimper and whine which sent both Zuko and Iroh into an irritated and furious state.
“Put her down now.” Zuko growled.
“Relax, kid. I’m just holding her. Something you learn with being on the sea is that kids are resilient. She’ll survive a little movement.” Hui laughed as he passed Azula to his other hand, “Kid’s just whining because you always come to help her. She’s never had to be independent.”
“Captain Hui, I believe my nephew has requested that you put down my niece. Now.” Iroh didn’t have the same build anymore that he did when he was the Dragon of the West but he could still command attention when he desired.
“He did make a request, didn’t he? And since when do I listen to some pathetic, exiled prince who’s chasing a—AAAHHH!” Hui’s words were cut off by Azula setting his coat on fire.
Truth be told it wasn’t a huge fire. Azula had sneezed thanks to her movement and the amount of dust being built up and it had caused her to sneeze out fire which caught onto Hui’s coat. As it turned out, pirate coats were very flammable—something Zuko mentally filed away for later—and the coat became full of fire within seconds. When Hui patted out the fire, he dropped Azula onto the table, causing her to cry.
“Azula!” Zuko was quick to scoop her up, “It’s okay. It’s okay. I’ve got you. You’re safe.” Gently patting her back and lightly bouncing her got Azula to quiet down quickly. Her crying had mainly been due to being dropped so the quick reassurance and safety Zuko provided was more than enough to calm her.
“Little brat!” Hui hissed, “Do you have anything to say for her, Zuko?”
“It’s Prince Zuko.” Zuko replied, “And I do: I’m upset she got to do it before I did.” Not taking another second to think, Zuko moved out of the room and back to his own quarters. Slamming the door closed, Zuko set Azula down onto the patted floor that he had gotten when she started crawling. Keiko advised getting her a soft surface to practice on so she didn’t hurt her knees.
“You can bend.” Zuko whispered, “You sneezed fire.” At eight months old. That had to be some kind of record for Fire Nation infants. Zuko silently wondered how, if news got back to Ozai, his father would react. Would he demand Azula back? Undo his banishment to get Azula back? Ignore it all together?
“And you messed up my meeting.”
If Azula cared at all about that, she didn’t show it, “Ugh!”
Zuko pinched his nose, “I’ll have to find another way to get through pirate territory to search the towns. Maybe I can land near Omashu then search on foot. It’ll take longer but there’s less of a chance of running into pirates.” But more of a chance of running into Fire Nation forces that were occupying Earth Kingdom areas. Spirits, it would have been so much easier to just get the pirates to let him sail but angering Hui had basically cemented that he wasn’t getting any extra help, “What am I going to—”
“Ah!” Azula grinned. She hadn’t gotten the hang of clapping yet but Zuko could tell that she wanted to, “U!”
“You’re so lucky you’re cute, do you know that?” Zuko grinned, tickling Azula’s stomach and causing her to giggle.
“Ah! Ah!” Azula giggled, kicking her legs.
Zuko was so focused on Azula and playing with her that he didn’t hear Iroh come into the room. Only when his uncle knelt down and Azula crawled to him did he actually look at Iroh. Azula knelt down in front of him with her hands gripping his boots. A sign that she wanted to be picked up.
“Hui left?”
“With colorful language.” Iroh added.
“How bad is this?”
“I won’t lie. It would have been much easier to search the Earth Kingdom with the pirates help. Other pirates would have left us alone and even some Fire Nation ships would have thought twice about stopping us.” Clearly not what Zuko wanted to hear as he fell back against the bed, “But I think you made the right choice.”
“Screwing up a needed deal was the right choice?” Zuko asked.
“Protecting Azula was the right choice.”
“U! U!” Azula cooed in Iroh’s arms.
Sitting up so he could hold Azula, Zuko wrapped his arms around his little sister as she fell asleep in his arms. It was always an amazing feat that Azula could just fall asleep in seconds if she decided she was safe enough. The sight of her curling up and sleeping calmly after Hui had practically been tossing her around was also a welcome and peaceful sight to Zuko. Better than ignoring Azula’s distress and making the deal.
“I think so too.”
—------------------------------------------------
The Earth Kingdom village of Qinchao was not exactly known for its hospitality. The villagers were unkind to any outsiders that came into their town, apparently this was a historical tradition that had been noted since the time of Kyoshi, and a crew from the Fire Nation was no different. Zuko and his crew had only been in the village for a couple of minutes before people began to demand that they leave. Despite his attempts to frighten them, the villagers held no fear for a banished Fire Nation prince and once again ordered him to go.
Zuko left the village after burning down one of the houses, leaving the crew confused. The prince may have been a lot of things but he wasn’t one to destroy property unless it was necessary, watching him burn one of the houses to the ground—albiet with no one inside—was a troubling sight for them all. For Iroh, who didn’t appear concerned when they returned with the news, it was just an excuse to sigh and head down to Zuko’s room where he found his nephew standing next to the bed and Azula playing with her toys on the floor.
“Happy birthday, Prince Zuko.”
“Don’t.”
“Why? It’s your 14th birthday, isn’t it?”
“I don’t want a reminder of it. I’ve been out here for nearly a year, uncle, and I haven’t found anything of the Avatar’s! All I’ve found are false leads, ghost stories and ridicule!” Zuko yelled.
“Prince Zuko, please—”
“Please what!? Please see the brighter side of all of this?! Please think of your mother!? Please think of your sister before you burst out!? Why am I not allowed to be angry!?! I lost everything! My home, my throne, my country, my father, Mai, everything! Everything is gone!” The fire on the candles glowed brighter, taking over the room, “Everything is gone and I can’t tell you because anytime I even think of getting upset you’re right there to tell me it’ll be okay and I should have tea or something!”
“Is that a bad thing?” Iroh asked.
“YES! I mean…no…I mean…” he fourteen year old collapsed onto his bed, his head in his hands, “I just—I just can’t do this, Uncle! No matter what I do, I’m not any closer to finding the Avatar. Then, I come back to the ship and I’m putting out fire after fire with Azula and I have to deal with the crew and I–...I’m so tired.”
Iroh rested a hand on Zuko’s shoulder, giving him a soft smile, “You’re still a child, Zuko, and you’re doing more than most adults can bring themselves to do. Raising a child is hard, I won’t deny that, but Azula is smiling, happy and she loves you. Please know that that counts for something.”
Zuko didn’t respond.
“Zuko, I—”
“No, Uncle—”
“Zuko, I know you might not want to hear the rambling of an old man but—”
“No. Look.”
He did look.
He looked and he saw Azula, who had been playing with her blocks on the floor, stand up all on her own. The boat was docked making for a pretty even floor and allowing Azula to actually get her footing. Once she stood up, Azula stared up at Zuko and Iroh and pushed herself towards them, taking steps as big as her little legs would allow her too. She took only about three before falling but Zuko and Iroh saw the whole thing.
“She walked!! Uncle, did you see that!?!” Zuko had already scooped up Azula and was holding her up, “You can walk! You can walk!!!”
“Ah!” Azula giggled, kicking her legs while Zuko held her in the air.
“You can walk.” Holding her closer to his chest now, Zuko finally allowed himself to properly breathe, “Uncle, she can walk. She can walk and…and she’s even walking early! Keiko said that she probably wouldn’t walk for another month but she did it early!” That was true. Keiko told him to be on the lookout for it but, given that Azula was only ten months old, there was still a strong possibility that she would take extra time to learn. The idea that Azula also ran the risk of running behind other babies and not walking when she was supposed to was also floated around during this conversation. He wasn’t sure why but the idea of such a thing left a knot in Zuko’s stomach, “Did you see!?”
Iroh released a small chuckle, “Yes, I did. You should go show the crew what she can do.” Iroh chuckled, “It’s good to keep her walking so she can get better at it.”
“What do you think? You want to show off your superior walking skills to the crew?” Zuko asked.
“Uh!” Her small coo was enough for Zuko to head out of his room and up towards the deck where the rest of the crew was stationed. Most of them were simply talking or leaning out over the deck to enjoy one of the last nice days before summer hit the Earth Kingdom.
“Zuko, there you are. We need to talk about—”
“We can talk later. There’s something more important I need to show you.”
“Your highness, I don’t think—”
Zuko walked right past the crewmember who was speaking and set Azula down on the deck. As usual, she was sitting with her legs tucked in and staring up at the crew members, expecting one of them to say or do something that she could watch. When none of them moved or spoke, Azula quickly grew bored and turned her attention down to her feet and the boards of the boat.
“Zuko—”
“Just give it a second.”
Azula scrunched up her face when no one moved towards her at the sound of her whines. Feeling more and more ignored, Azula’s whines turned to wailing and fat tears running down her face. Unable to take much more of ignoring the infant, Keiko started towards Azula to pick her up and comfort her only for Zuko to stop her with an arm in front of her stomach.
“What are you doing?”
“Trust me. She’s about to do it.”
“Is ‘it’ continuing to cry her eyes out because she’s being neglected?”
“She’s not being neglected. We’re all right here!”
“Right here and ignoring her cries. She’s upset, Zuko. I don’t know what you want her to do but she wants to be held and comforted. Not—” Azula yanked on Keiko’s boot and curled her little fists around the top, “Not now, Azula. You can’t ignore a ten month old. If she cries, you need to—” Keiko’s speech stopped when her words finally caught up with her. She turned to stare down and found the baby staring up at her with a confused expression, “She…Did she…?”
“She can walk.” Zuko whispered, “She walked to you from her spot.” About seven steps if he was counting.
“We have a walking baby!” Keiko chuckled, “She’s going to be walking all over the ship in no time.”
“I’m gonna go lock up my knives.” Someone said.
Zuko decided to ignore that comment in favor of scooping Azula up and holding her close to his chest. Her crying had stopped by now, replaced by happy coos and smiles when she saw how many people were looking at her and grinning. It was brief, but Zuko also took the chance to look up at all the people who were seemingly celebrating his sister’s accomplishment. The returned cooing, baby talk, words of praise, all of it was for Azula. He couldn’t remember the last time in the palace his father had looked at either of them with a fraction of the joy the crew was giving to Azula.
He loved it.
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Fun fact: first birthdays are boring.
This was something Zuko learned when Azula had her first birthday on the boat in the middle of the ocean. He didn’t really remember his own first birthday, being one and all, and none of the other crew members remembered their first birthdays either. There was a tradition in the Fire Nation Zuko partially remembered where the friends and family would get together and the baby would be allowed to eat their first sweets, but, given that Azula had already stuffed her face full of chocolate on multiple occasions, that tradition seemed to be unnecessary.
The idea was floated around to completely ignore the day as they didn’t really have any means to celebrate either and it wasn’t like Azula would remember the day. Zuko couldn’t find it within himself to even consider the idea. It wasn’t a horrible injustice by any means but the idea of completely ignoring her birthday felt….like a unique kind of horrible. Keiko and Iroh tried to assure him that it wasn’t and that Azula would never even ask about her first birthday, but it did little to calm his worries.
That’s how the crew ended up celebrating Azula’s first day in the middle of the ocean with their last good pieces of roast duck. Although the cook did manage to make mango sweet sticky rice for dessert which Azula happily ate up without complaint. It was nothing huge, some might not even recognize it as a birthday but Zuko loved seeing Azula’s giggling face and the giant open smile when she looked at him or Iroh.
“You’re a good dad, kid.” Keiko chuckled.
“I’m not a dad.”
“Please. You are absolutely that girl’s father by this point.” Another crew member said, “You feed her, play with her, clothe her, keep her safe. Sounds like a dad to me.”
“And a good dad at that. He actually wants to take care of her.” Someone added.
“Because she’s my sister. I want to make sure she’s well taken care of. What person would not want to take care of their own….of someone who needs them?” No one decided to answer him with the obvious response.
“Well, you’re still doing really good, Prince Zuko. Azula will grow up into a very strong and–”
“Zuzu!”
Everyone froze.
“Did she just…?”
“Zuzu! Zuzu!”
Zuko felt his legs go weak and his jaw drop. For the past year, he was sure that it would be finding the Avatar that would leave him feeling like his very spirit had left his body. Never did he imagine it would be watching Azula laugh and say his name as her first word. Not dada, not mama, not even Roro for Iroh, but Zuzu. His name. Her first word was his name.
“You said my name.”
“Zuzu!” She repeated. When she saw that everyone seemed happy about her action, her baby mind told her to repeat it as many times as possible for more love.
“She said my name.”
“She did.”
“Still think you aren’t her dad?” Keiko asked.
“I’m not.” Zuko ruffled Azula’s hair to get a laugh out of her, “She has a father.”
“A piece of—” The crew member was cut off by someone stepping on his foot.
“Whatever you say, kid.” Keiko smiled, “Whatever you say.”
It would be another two years before Zuko finally found the Avatar in the South Pole.
Three years before he helped the Avatar take down his father and finally break off all connections with Ozai. When he did, he was clear to tell Azula she didn’t have to renounce Ozai if she didn’t want to. He didn’t want to force Azula into any choice or make her feel guilty for wanting to know her biological father. Azula could think of Zuko as her father if she wasn’t but she didn’t have to if she didn’t feel comfortable.
Azula made her opinion clear when she proudly called Zuko dad and went around the palace telling anyone she could find that the Fire Lord was her father.
“So, you’re a dad, huh?” Katara chuckled.
“I guess I am.” Zuko laughed.
“You okay with that?” Sokka asked.
“Dad! Come here! I gotta tell the cook!” Azula called, “Come on! You’re so slow!”
“Yeah. I think I’m okay with this.”