Dispatch fics with fun friends and HR violations
The goodness of a man who just want to make his own life a bit easier, instead got these fuckasses to deal with.
(Open, Unmoderated)
Random works
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I want to find a home (and I want to share it with you) by EmmaSmoke
Fandoms: Dispatch (Video Game)
16 Dec 2025
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Summary
Robert has never told the Z-team what his secondary gender is, but it's obviously a beta. He barely has a scent, and he doesn't really do anything with his instincts. So, of course, they're going to be surprised when they find that he's an omega. Though, they aren't as surprised that he doesn't have a nest because they're all-too-familiar with his typical passive suicidal nature.
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Trigger Warning: Omegaverse (but no smut), suicidal impulses -
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Summary
Robert's been trying not to violently attack anyone when working as a Dispatcher for SDN - considering it's not exactly the most heroic move in anyone's books, especially not literal superheroes.
But when his team doesn't shut the hell up, Robert's headache (combined with his lack of sleep from his lack of a mattress) might make him a little looser in the whole 'repressing his reflexes that he used in life or death situations when he was Mecha Man' department.
And, if he accidentally bodyslams Flambae into the breakroom microwave as a result of that, Robert will threaten you with unpaid time off to stop that information from spreading.
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Robert learns that his best friend Herman is a virgin
He remembers his own first time being, well, less than spectacular
He wants Herman's to be something special
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@r.robertsonIII tweets with a photo and a caption
A selfie of him standing outside, holding Beef in his other arm. He smiles at the camera, hair slightly tousled and the first button of his SDN work shirt undone.
I was informed of my new fame and decided to finally make an account. Glad to see that my work behind a desk doesn’t go unrecognised. This is Beef :)
@velocipastor retweets with caption
holy fuck they really do have the wrong guy behind the desk
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It was refreshing, he thought. It felt nice to set down the roles of heroes for a night and just be people, go out into the world without the expectation of helping whoever needed help at that moment.
That didn’t stop Prism from attracting lost, recently heartbroken girls in the bathroom of whatever club they’d go to and making it her personal mission to talk them into making better decisions, but at least it was a choice, then. She would return to find Flambae on the dancefloor, often accompanied by some other man, and whoever she didn’t approve of would be pushed to the side and told he was taken, because she’d apparently made it her mission to get him to make better decisions, too.
Hence the dread. Hence the gradual fade of her music as she read his silence exactly for what it was.
“Okay,” she said, “get your ass over here and tell me what’s up.”
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Or: Flambae has a confession to make.
Series
Random bookmarks
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ManMech was a Vtuber whose main gimmick was acting as a dorkish Mechaman impersonator. It's a known joke within his community that he's well overdue to be sued by the hero's lawyers for his burlesque parody.
Robert is just hoping that nobody makes the connection-- that they're actually the same person.
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- Part 4 of Sorta-Related Dispatch Fics
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Every power has a price. Something that would make you laugh at the irony if it wasn't so damn infuriating. A man with the strength of ten at the height of half of one. A woman with asthma who needs to hold her breath to stay invisible. A walking fireball who can lose his eyebrows to a rogue flame.
So of course when Robert realized he wasn't powerless, he could only laugh at the irony.
An immortal man who wishes he was dead really was the icing on the cake.
Updates weekly (mostly), 2/16 post delayed
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Robert Robertson the Third disappeared shortly after he finished high school, vanishing one summer day without a trace.
Just over a decade later, Robert Park is hired by the Superhero Dispatch Network's Torrance Branch to help in their IT department, and maybe he'll end up helping more along the way.
Series
- Part 1 of The Life and Times of Robert Park
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“I control the fire and the flame," Flambae waved his wand, and fire roared to life around him, licking the edges of the workspace.
“Oh, you’re like… tell people obvious shit guy,” Robert muttered, already exhausted by the man’s obnoxious attitude.
Robert Robertson enters his final year at Hogwarts and is convinced to join SDN, the Spellcasting Dueling Nexus.
aka Hogwarts AU
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The first Mecha Man to grace L.A. was titled Mecha Man Prime, being the first in the legacy of non-powered humans to make a difference as a hero. The second Mecha Man named himself Astral and made his debut in L.A. as the leader of a group of heroes.
Robert was supposed to be the third Mecha Man. His father would have wanted that for him, but disappointing his father isn't new to him anyway.
In Robert's defense, he had a very valid crash out after his dad was murdered a decade ago. In his opinion, this leads to his very reasonable agenda of hunting down the man who murdered him. It sucks, because it's his target is beloved by the entire damn State.
L.A.'s third Mecha Man, Elliot Connors.
(OR: Robert Robertson is L.A.'s most wanted supervillain, hunting down the newly retired Mecha Man one dispatch call at a time.)
(OR OR: Dispatch ft. Villain Robert Robertson III)