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The Kim Namjoon and Min Yoongi Completely Foolproof Matchmaker Avoidance Strategy (Patent Pending) by sequoiasem for patroclvss
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
12 Nov 2024
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Summary
To spoil their families’ matchmaking plans, Namjoon and Yoongi decide to get married... to each other. After all, don’t they always say you should marry your best friend?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 140,798
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Comments:
- 437
- Kudos:
- 636
- Bookmarks:
- 194
- Hits:
- 19,958
Bookmarked by valsalsa
13 Aug 2026
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good_things_final_final322.mp3 by saplecute for itisalldirty
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
21 May 2022
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Summary
It all starts with a: “Hey, you’re the guy in the poster on my dad’s wall!”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,777
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 208
- Kudos:
- 1,793
- Bookmarks:
- 563
- Hits:
- 17,143
Bookmarked by valsalsa
07 Aug 2026
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take me out (the date way or the assassination way) by fruitily
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
24 May 2017
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Summary
yoongi [7:58]
IM READY TO DROP DEADjimin [7:59]
relatablejin [7:59]
you say that at least three times a weeknamjoon [7:59]
is this about the guy you keep running intotae [8:00]
what guy?????? are u keeping tea from me????????jin [8:01]
theres a mysterious hot guy on campus that yoongi keeps running into like a damn romantic drama but every time they meet he ends up nearly killing yoongitae [8:01]
kinky- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,954
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 12
- Comments:
- 299
- Kudos:
- 13,757
- Bookmarks:
- 2,991
- Hits:
- 119,747
Bookmarked by valsalsa
05 Aug 2026
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when breaking rules (go hard or go home) by fruitily
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
07 Jul 2017
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Summary
when you’re a freshman, you learn a few things during the first couple of weeks, things that aren’t written down anywhere:
1. you don’t pick more than one eight a.m. class per semester because you won’t be able to get up
2. you don’t leave your laundry in the dryer overnight because it will get stolen
3. you don’t get involved with min yoongi./
or: jungkook gets involved with min yoongi. jimin would make a terrible secret agent, and taehyung is a lizard dealer (?)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,521
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 210
- Kudos:
- 8,576
- Bookmarks:
- 2,222
- Hits:
- 91,995
Bookmarked by valsalsa
04 Aug 2026
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Summary
Disaster witch Kim Taehyung meets perfect senior Min Yoongi in the poison greenhouses of witch school. Years later, Taehyung owns a clinic that fixes hearts, Yoongi has a celebrated apothecary, and they (don't) get along.
Harry Potter-ish, but not in that universe.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,068
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 244
- Kudos:
- 2,833
- Bookmarks:
- 1,093
- Hits:
- 41,010
Bookmarked by valsalsa
31 Jul 2026
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Summary
Yoongi marries his best friend because it's mutually beneficial for both of them. He just doesn't expect to fall for him in the process.
Namjoon
[14:03]
do you want to marry me?Yoongi’s eyebrow shoots up when he reads the message, because what the heck is he on about?
Namjoon
[14:04]
because I just had a meeting with my student advisor and she said the only way I can get the aid I need to survive next semester is if im married, have a kid or over 26 and since the other two aren’t happening…Yoongi
[14:07]
Are you being fucking serious right now?Bookmarked by valsalsa
28 Jul 2026
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Yoongi meets Taehyung in autumn and falls for him over the winter.
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Summary
Seokjin knows why he’s awake at 4 AM and trolling around the beach almost every weekday.
He has no fucking clue why this other guy is.Or: the one where Jin and Yoongi have the same idea, briefly resent each other because of it, and then joke their way through the rest.
Bookmarked by valsalsa
20 Jul 2026
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Summary
“Have you ever done something wrong and felt okay about it, Kim Namjoon?”
(or: namgi au where hockey player namjoon gets suspended for an injury and meets physical therapist yoongi)
Bookmarked by valsalsa
19 Jul 2026
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Summary
"Speaking of things we’re not supposed to be saying, I thought we’d agreed not to mention the Antarctica emails again, huh? I was drunk and emotional over penguins, you can’t hold those emails against me forever, Kim Namjoon, it’s been over three YEARS."
(a collection of Yoongi and Namjoon's correspondence over the years)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,100
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 86
- Kudos:
- 437
- Bookmarks:
- 105
- Hits:
- 2,919
Bookmarked by valsalsa
19 Jul 2026
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hedonic adaptation by missandrogyny for MissCeeEmBee
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
13 May 2026
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Summary
Lunchtime prep has always been simple. Service is from eleven to two-thirty, and they’re only really serving soups and stews, mostly to cater to the elderly population nearby.
“I’m going to smoke,” Yoongi says gruffly. He pulls off his apron and drops it in front of his station. “Seokjin-hyung’s in charge.”
He doesn’t wait for a response, just stalks off to his locker to grab his pack of cigarettes. Distantly, he hears some chatter, some laughter, and a bout of quiet complaining from Hoseok, “He doesn’t always need to tell us that he left you in charge.”
“Well,” Yoongi hears Seokjin reply. “He does that because Yoongi has a cru—”
Yoongi shuts the door behind him.
(or: AU where Yoongi and Seokjin run a restaurant together.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,891
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 50
- Kudos:
- 432
- Bookmarks:
- 118
- Hits:
- 3,567
Bookmarked by valsalsa
18 Jul 2026
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Summary
The thing about rules is that Yoongi was never very good at following them.
It’s not that he doesn’t like them, exactly. He likes keeping things in neat categories. He likes making lists and systems and rituals; likes contingency planning, and sometimes that has to come from rules, whether self-imposed or overarching.It’s just that he always had a tendency to deviate from them, a natural urge to test the edges, to see how far a rule could bend before he suffered the consequences.
It shouldn’t come as a surprise, then, that he couldn’t follow very simple rules when it came to sleeping with Seokjin either.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,783
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 92
- Kudos:
- 319
- Bookmarks:
- 95
- Hits:
- 4,587
Bookmarked by valsalsa
18 Jul 2026
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Summary
In 1605, there finally came a betrayal that the king did not predict. A mere servant boy slit Yi Yoongi’s throat in his own bedchamber, leaving him to bleed out on his bedsheets in the middle of the night, unable to call his guards for help.
But this, as you’re probably aware, is only the beginning of the story.
(Or as they crash together across five turbulent centuries, Yoongi and Seokjin fight and bleed and eventually love.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,468
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 188
- Kudos:
- 1,196
- Bookmarks:
- 513
- Hits:
- 15,185
Bookmarked by valsalsa
14 Jul 2026
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Summary
Yoongi isn’t untouchable. Seokjin kissed him on the third date, and they slept together again after the fourth. It’s more of a time-lapsed thing. Like, they’ll have their tongues down each others’ throats one second, but within a minute Yoongi is hiding his face in his hands like he can’t believe he did it. He’ll paw at Seokjin’s back while Seokjin fucks him, but after the first fifteen thrusts he rolls them over, hands in his hair as he rides them both to oblivion.
(Five months into their relationship, Yoongi still won't share Seokjin's bed. Seokjin is reasonably concerned about it.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,995
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 96
- Kudos:
- 1,868
- Bookmarks:
- 487
- Hits:
- 14,463
Bookmarked by valsalsa
11 Jul 2026
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Summary
Jungkook has a reputation on campus: loudmouthed, arrogant, and a player.
Yoongi is quiet, reserved, and spends most of his nights in the art building.Their paths never cross. Until one night at the Alpha Theta Halloween party.
Turns out, the school's star hockey player isn't nearly as confident as everyone thinks he is.Bookmarked by valsalsa
10 Jul 2026
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Summary
“Go… away,” Yoongi wheezes.
Seokjin clicks his tongue. “Gladly, Sweetheart,” he says. “But if I were you, I’d hop on with your old friend before you end up in the back of that patrol car over there. It is awfully close to us, isn’t it?”
Yoongi gives him a look, then peeks over his shoulder. They’re gonna spot him any minute.
“I don’t need your help,” he lies. “Besides, how do I know you’re not gonna turn me in anyway?”
“I think you do need my help, actually,” Seokjin says, eyes rolling, ignoring the question. “You’re in no shape to outrun a car.”
“I can outrun them just fine, I’ve done it before.”
Seokjin considers him for a second, head tilting. Yoongi feels scrutinized under his gaze.
And then, in a split second, the car is speeding towards them, the cops having spotted them by the fence.
“Yoongi,” Seokjin says urgently, hand outstretched, “trust me.”
Yoongi really has no reason to. But it’s either this or jail, so he takes the hand.
~~
( Yoongi has been alone all his life, save for his favourite tree. He doesn’t need anybody and that’s the way he likes it.
But it only takes one person to change everything. )
Bookmarked by valsalsa
08 Jul 2026
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Do You Remember the First Time? by Juni_luna for pagdiwa (neko11lover)
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
18 May 2026
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Summary
Seokjin and Yoongi are not in a rut, they just like to shake things up sometimes. When they meet Namjoon and Jungkook, a much younger couple that can't keep their hands off each other, Seokjin decides that it's time to take the bull by the horns and inject some danger into their marriage.
On Grindr, he meets August, a mysterious younger man who seems to be looking for the same thing. And everything is going perfectly fine... until Jungkook and Namjoon get the wrong idea.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 23,373
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 48
- Kudos:
- 280
- Bookmarks:
- 64
- Hits:
- 3,095
Bookmarked by valsalsa
05 Jul 2026
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Summary
"Yeah, hyung,” Yoongi says, and then he reaches over and takes Seokjin’s hand, sliding his palm against his, fingers mitten-style. He pulls it into his lap. “Yes, I’m so scared.”
(Seokjin is tired of fans saying there is someone in the background of their VLives and decides to have a live ghost hunt. Yoongi is an opportunist.)
Bookmarked by valsalsa
01 Jul 2026
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Summary
So maybe quitting his full time, well paying job to start a career as a streamer wasn’t his best decision. Yet, Seokjin did it anyway. He happily handed in his two weeks notice and started up a streaming account and assumed he would get viewers right away. After all, he thinks he’s hilarious. His mom thinks he’s hilarious. Yoongi sometimes chuckles at his jokes. So, Seokjin assumed it would be a no brainer.
However, one month had passed and Seokjin was yet to get even a single viewer.
OR:
jungkook join's seokjin's stream and is his first ever viewer
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,308
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 43
- Kudos:
- 447
- Bookmarks:
- 69
- Hits:
- 2,669
Bookmarked by valsalsa
30 Jun 2026
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How To Bake Bread and Destroy Your Enemies by TragicwithacapitalT
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
24 Jun 2021
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Summary
Yoongi's new restaurant is going to be his biggest achievement to date. He has everything planned for a smooth opening except for one thing– He doesn't have a pastry chef.
When Jimin suggests a friend of his, Yoongi thinks nothing of the name. That is until he's standing face to face with his new pastry chef and biggest rival since culinary school, Kim Seokjin.
Or the one where Yoongi and Seokjin think they hate each other but actually they're just stupid and in love.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,083
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 39
- Kudos:
- 837
- Bookmarks:
- 157
- Hits:
- 9,010
Bookmarked by valsalsa
29 Jun 2026