Chapter Text
god is dead and its 69% ouma’s fault
{11:47 am}
Harukawa (@Harukawa): die
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): maki-roll!!!! :(((
Harukawa (@Harukawa): sorry. force of habit.
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): i would if i could
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): die, that is
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): Hoshi!!!!!
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): ?
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): i cant have my sidekicks dying on me!!
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): i thought i was your sidekick…
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): you are!!
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): so i’m apparently a back-up sidekick?
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): no!!!
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): all of you guys are my sidekicks and i love you all!! (not Ouma)
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): HEY
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): then why do you only hang out with Saihara and Harukawa
Harukawa (@Harukawa): @Momota choose your next words very carefully.
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): uhm.. see they both were more introverts that didnt want to interact with anyone, and needed someone to help them out of their shells!!!
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): that was then. what about now?
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): well maki-roll’s my best friend!! of course i’m gonna spend time w/her!!! also she dosent like opening up to other ppl so i gotta spend time w/her!
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): and saihara?
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): shuichi’s got some depressing behavior and thoughts, and i never want my sidekicks to feel like that or think stuff like that, so im making sure he feels loved by spending time w/him!!
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): thx Kaito
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): but please re-read what you just said and who you said it to
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): ??
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): i literally just said i wish i could die
The President (@K1-B0): I truly don’t mean to offend, but Momota, how did you forget what this conversation started from?
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): IM SRRY OKAY IT SLIPPED MY MIND
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): how do u even forget Hoshi-kun’s whole MO- u rlly must be a special type of idiot
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): OKAY U SHUT UP ITS NOT MY FAULT IM BAD WITH MEMORY
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): as well as everything else apparently ^^
Harukawa (@Harukawa): do you wanna die?
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): Maki-roll!!!!
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): yes
space isn’t the only thing thats empty (@Momota): Hoshi!!!!
Harukawa (@Harukawa): @Ouma consider yourself lucky Hope's Peak values you enough to keep you as a student. The minute you cease to be protected by the no-violence against students policy, you’re dead.
Harukawa (@Harukawa): and before you ask, Hoshi, i’m not going to kill you
i love living (kill me) (@Hoshi): damn it
{2:32 pm}
The President (@K1-B0): @Ouma What did you do?
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): whaaaatt
The President (@K1-B0): You know exactly what I’m talking about!
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): no i dont
The President (@K1-B0): Yes you do!
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): whats going on?
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): nothing Amami!!! but if you ask me i think kee-boy over here has a virus 0-0
The President (@K1-B0): Wha- My programming is perfectly fine! I have a daily anti-virus scan, and I can assure you there is nothing out of the ordinary with me. Please do not listen to his lies, Amami-kun!
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Kiibo-kun, are you referring to the fact that Iruma-chan’s gadgets have all been stolen and stacked together to create that giant statue on the third floor’s garden?
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): …
The President (@K1-B0): Yes! Me, Kazuichi-kun, Chihiro-san, and Miu decided to go out for lunch together to celebrate the progress we’ve made so far in our project. We were gone for about an hour, and when we came back, all of Miu’s things were gone! I was searching the third floor when I found it.
The President (@K1-B0): The only person who would go to such lengths to build that is Ouma-kun! And maybe Miu, but she was with us the entire time.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): u dont even have proof i did anythinggggg- why would i take time out of my busy day to build a statueeeee
The President (@K1-B0): Then please, pray tell, why Nanami-senpai mentioned she saw you running into the Garden with items that resembled Miu’s inventions?
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): …fuck i thought she was sleeping.
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): im sorry- what did he even build?
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): …
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Ah, well…
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): …
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): guys… what.. did he build
[taste the rainbow] has come online
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): @Ouma DEGENERATE!!!
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): ?????
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): YOU AND YOUR DISGUSTING PERVERSE WAYS MAKE ME SICK
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): im not perverse D:
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): SHUT IT DEGENERATE! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO ADDRESS ME AFTER THE ATROCITY THAT HAS OCCURED!!!
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): WHAT. DID. HE. BUILD.
[½ the creator of a murder roomba] has come online
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): @Ouma HEY ASSHOLE
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): haiiii :D
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): KYS
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): D:
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): @Ouma WHY TF WOULD U DO THAT???
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): i did nothing
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): @Ouma WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU BUILD???
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Oh dear, how should I put this?
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): …
The President (@K1-B0): Amami- he-
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): @Amami HE BUILT A STATUE OF A FUCKING DICK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE THIRD FLOOR GARDEN
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): …
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): what
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): USUALLY I WOULD ENJOY A STATUE LIKE THIS BUT THAT FAILED ABORTION USED MY SHIT TO BUILD IT
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): THAT LITTLE BITCH STAINED HIMEKO’S EYES WITH THE MALE GENITALS
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): omfg yumeno saw it??? yesssssssssssssss
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): KEEP HIMEKO OUT OF THIS!
—
tech lab > everyone else
{2:55 pm}
ankle scars and vacuum-phobia (@Souda): @Iruma @K1-B0 i swear to god i dont care how fucking long it takes me, i will Ouma-proof our damn lab.
I Have Your IP :D (@Fujisaki): thats a bold statement
ankle scars and vacuum-phobia (@Souda): all i need is about 19 shots of espresso and week
—
god is dead and its 69% ouma’s fault
{2:55 pm}
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): @Ouma YOU BETTER FUCKING TAKE THE STATUE DOWN- YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED PUNK
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): but what if i dont want tooooooo
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Well then you would have to deal with the consequences.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): what r u gonna do?? recite from a textbook until im so bored that i take down the statue??? try me bitch
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): @Tojo
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): get em, Kiyo
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): you fucker
[wouldn’t leave to get milk] has come online
wouldn’t leave to get milk (@Tojo): Ouma.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): gulp
wouldn’t leave to get milk (@Tojo): It would be appreciated if you would assist me in taking down the statue on the third floor’s garden, without damaging any of Iruma-chan’s inventions.
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): Tojo-san, you dont have to help him
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): yes!!! Tojo-san, dont force yourself to clean up after him, the degenerate needs to be responsible for his actions!!!
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Do not push yourself, Tojo-san. You might believe it is your duty as the Ultimate Maid to assist us in our endeavors, but that does not mean you should clean up after us. You already do so much for us, and we all take it for granted.
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): @Ouma see what you’ve done, asshole?! you better clean up or else!
wouldn’t leave to get milk (@Tojo): Thank you all for your kind words, i appreciate them. But as a member of this class i want to assist you all, not just because i am a maid, but because i want to be a support for all of you.
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): Tojo-san…
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): Tojo-san, next time we both are free, allow me to treat you to some teas i've picked up from my latest adventures
The President (@K1-B0): Tojo-san! You’ve always been there for us, I have to say I believe most of us wouldn’t be able to function without you! I really appreciate everything, I feel as if I don’t say it enough.
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): TOJO-SAN ILY LIKE ILY SM
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): dont worry, Tojo-san! i was going to bring it all back anyway!! dw about helping me, if you do, then i’ll be forced to show you my secret ways of getting around school
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): thin ice bitch
wouldn’t leave to get milk (@Tojo): Very well, if my services are not needed then i will leave you to it.
wouldn’t leave to get milk (@Tojo): @Amami What if we met up for tea now, since i now have the afternoon off?
The Ultimate “Survivor” (@Amami): yes!! that works perfectly, do you mind meeting up in the dorm's common room?
wouldn’t leave to get milk (@Tojo): I will be there in a moment
[wouldn’t leave to get milk] has gone offline
[The Ultimate “Survivor”] has gone offline
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): welp
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): @K1-B0 hey Kee-boy, u wouldnt mind helping a friend in need, right???
The President (@K1-B0): Ouma fucking Kokichi. just a little warning. if you fuck with the shit in my lab again, i will hack all of your socials and make sure that you wont be able to leave your house again out of shame.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): KIIBO???
taste the rainbow (@Chabashira): OUMA WHAT DID YOU DO
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): ????
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Ahem, Kiibo-kun, as much as I don’t doubt your abilities, you might need to re-run that daily anti-virus scan.
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): denxjmwkcnhbgryhucformdjncrcfuij
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): dw thats just Chihiro, she took kiibo’s phone when she saw the abortion’s name
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): but damn nice roast guchi
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Please, never call me that.
The President (@K1-B0): Ah! I’m so sorry everyone! Chihiro-san stole my phone! My deepest apologies for anything she might’ve said.
*cries in social anxiety* (@Saihara): dw Kiibo-kun, just go back to whatever you were doing beforehand, the inventions will be back in no time
The President (@K1-B0): Thank you so much, Saihara-kun! Well, I must be going, Kazuichi-kun looks like he’s about to go insane and I must check on him!
[The President] has gone offline
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): damn.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): well
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): ..Shumai, my favorite person in the world,
[*cries in social anxiety*] has gone offline
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): SHUMAI YOU TRAITOR
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): I DONT LOVE YOU ANYMORE
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): …
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): shit i thought that’d work
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): …
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): Chabashira, my favorite lesbian!
[taste the rainbow] has gone offline
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): is it because i made fun of Yumeno????
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): boo whore
Sesquipedalian +other smart words (@Shinguji): Don’t even try it.
[Sesquipedalian +other smart words] has gone offline
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): I DIDNT EVEN SAY ANTHING
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): ugh i cant believe im doing this
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): Miu!! My partner in crime, my colleague, my comrade, my best friend.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): will you aid me in this time of need?
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): say im the hottest person youve ever met
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): ewww gross
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): then i guess i’ll just have to leave
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): WAIT WAIT WAIT ILL SAY IT
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): Miu, you are the hottest person i’ve ever met.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): there. happy?
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): very
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): good now help me disassemble the dick
½ the creator of a murder roomba (@Iruma): nah
[½ the creator of a murder roomba] has gone offline
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): SLUT.
50% of all chaos (@Ouma): ugh fineeeeeeeeeeeeeee ill fix the stupid statue myself
[50% of all chaos] has gone offline