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Techno hasn't exactly met his neighbors.
Not properly at least.
He knows their names, Phil and his son Tommy, but he couldn't tell you their ages or what Phil does for a living. He knows Phil drives a mom van that's mint green and seen better days and that Tommy has the loudest friends in the world.
He knows that they have a dog that would spend all nights barking endlessly at nothing. Phil cusses like a sailor and Tommy absorbs every word of it like a sponge. The old man sucks at yardwork but will gladly overpay the neighborhood kids to mow his lawn.
He knows they're good people.
They've lived next to each other for 3 years now and he's been on the receiving end of their kindness more times than he could count. Phil dropping over leftovers when he caught sight of Techno coming home too tired to function or a stack of firewood during the winter.
Tommy always wished him a good day when he was running for the school bus and saw Techno outside in the garden. The kid couldn't pronounce his name to save his life but it was the thought that counts.
And when he comes home from school he sometimes has a picture drawn just for him. Tommy is not an artist but Techno still keeps the spaghetti haired stick figures in a folder in his office.
He wouldn't call himself attached but he also would hate for the Watsons to move out. Only able to imagine the nightmare scenarios of who would move in to replace them.
Which is how he ended up here.
Staring at the adorable little letter in his grasp written with a bright red crayon and large print lined paper to practice letters on. It wasn't meant for him, obviously, but destiny had a funny way of showing itself.
Techno had been out in his barn.
It wasn't a huge barn, the area he chose to live in didn't allow for that. The houses were akin to thrown together attempts at suburbs. No karens yelling about the color of your siding but still trying to appear put together.
Most houses don't have second floors or more than two bedrooms. Parking was a 'whatever works' kind of situation with cars on lawns sometimes. The area had a bit of a reputation for crime but people looked out for each other.
As long as you didn't throw insults at the local gangs or try to snitch you'd be taken care of like one of their own.
The area was cheap, affordable for fresh out of college kids like Techno still trying to find his place in the world or single dads who were trying their hardest to give their son the world.
And Techno had a barn because he had a horse.
Did he have enough land for a horse? No. But he wasn't giving up his horse. Carl was his pride and joy and the reason he even went to college in the first place. The reason he survived on instant ramen because the local farm store overcharged for the shire's favorite feed.
And he wasn't confining Carl. He had Phil's permission to let the horse roam about between their yards and he took the horse on frequent trips down to the supermarket or anywhere else he could reasonably bring him.
Regardless, he had a barn which he had been inside of, making sure that Carl was prepared for the blizzard that had set upon the area. Shivering as the snow and wind hammered at the door.
It had come on so fast. With Phil practically screaming at Tommy to get inside once the school had dropped him off. Using his own coat to shield the kid who cackled like this was the greatest thing ever and not a possible life or death situation for some people.
Ah to be young and happy about snow.
He remembers those days.
When he had turned to finally head inside and warm up again however, he had been practically slapped in the face by an envelope. Sporting a papercut on his right cheek from it that itched like crazy.
His first thought was that the poor mailman had been sacrificed to the elements.
Then as he ripped the paper off his face, he saw the bright red "TO SATAN" written across the front and curiosity overtook him.
Tommy apparently didn't know how to write 'Santa'.
Or maybe this was on purpose and the kid really was seeking out the help of the devil himself.
Given what he knows of the brat, it could be either.
Once inside, he opened it and here he was. Staring at it and processing the words. He had thought maybe he'd see a long list of toys or a desire for superpowers. Maybe even world domination.
Instead, Tommy had asked for one thing and one thing only.
"...please bring my brother home." Techno muttered aloud, rereading it over and over again. Terrible grammar and spelling but he got the gist of it. Every single time he looked at it he felt this gross feeling in his chest.
He hated having a heart. It always got him in trouble. Doing stupid things like racing across campus to literally give the shirt off his back to Niki because her time of the month surprised her for example.
He would never live that down. Still embarrassed by the photos of him shirtless studying in the library on Dream's stupid twitter.
He got amazing cookies out of it at least.
But his heart was beating as fast as the wind against the windows. Staring at this paper as he processed the words.
Tommy had a brother, which he hadn't known about nor ever saw. Judging by the sloppy writing however 'Wilbee' was at college in the next city over. He knew exactly what school the guy must've been at.
There was only one campus there that had housing. It wasn't anything fancy and the degree options left a lot to be desired. Techno had considered it in his search but ultimately chose elsewhere just for safety reasons.
The water fountains in the building smelled like cheese.
That was never a good sign.
That school was also a death trap of roads abandoned by the government. Never salted or plowed which meant that once snow set in no one got in or out unless they could fly. He hadn't met anyone that could fly yet however so he doubted Wilbee could.
There was less than a week before Christmas and the blizzard would maybe slow down in half of that time. The snow definitely wouldn't melt before then.
No wonder Tommy had turned to satanism for help.
Techno glanced to the wall holding an old fashioned harness.
And he thought of the drawings in his office drawer.
Was he seriously about to do this?
Wilbur hated winter with a passion.
He hated the cold and the snow, hated how no matter how hard he tried he always ended up with snow in his boots and soaked socks. He hated how he wound up curled up by the heater because his hands had poor circulation.
Which is what he was doing now. A handmade shawl thrown over his shoulders and his legs practically straddling the machine in the center of the living area. Angrily glaring at the wall across from him as candles flickered for the only light source.
He was so thankful one of these bastards he lived with had a sense of paranoia and overstocked in preparation for a storm they hadn't seen since the start of college. The generator loud in the other room keeping them from freezing to death.
"Another done!" Bad cheered happily, holding up the third shawl he's made since the power went out. Passing it off to the nearest person who happened to be Punz. "Who else wants one?"
"How the hell are your hands still working?!" Wilbur demanded.
"Language! And I'm pretty resistant to the cold. I'm usually overheating." The man chuckled, surfing through his bag of yarn to find his next color of choice. He leaned over to touch Wilbur's face briefly and sure enough the man was somehow still warm.
Jack came out of the kitchen where they had an emergency kettle on, holding 3 mugs precariously that he started to pass out. Wilbur had never been happier to see watery hot chocolate in his life.
Not even bothering to drink it, just hold it and bask in its warmth.
"I'm sorry to say Wil but it doesn't look like any of us are leaving anytime soon." That was Sam who was perched at the window staring out. Cringing as a large mound of snow rolled off the roof and splattered to the ground.
Wilbur could only groan. "Tommy's going to kill me."
"I'm sure he'll understand it wasn't your fault."
"Bad, he's 6 years old! He won't understand shit. He only knows I've betrayed him. One time I was late for movie night because the car ran out of gas and he punched me in the dick!"
Jack choked on his drink, bursting into a laugh. "MY FAVORITE KID!"
Wilbur picked up the nearest pillow and threw it at him. It missed of course.
"Oh dear. Well did you at least call him?"
"I called dad and he said he'd talk to him." Wilbur finally took a sip of his drink, making a face at the taste. "...if I survive this, I might only get the silent treatment."
"Sorry Wil, if I could drive you I would but my truck is in the shop."
"Don't worry about it Sam. Even your truck wouldn't get through this. It'd take a miracle or a flying reindeer sleigh."
"...how about a horse drawn sleigh?"
"Well I guess but I can't exactly call uber up for that can I?"
Sam tapped the window and let out an incredulous laugh. "I mean, there's one coming down the parking lot right now!"
Everyone quickly jumped to their feet, crowding around the window. Sam pushed to the side as they struggled to peer through the harsh wind. Yet once they could focus sure enough there it was.
Wilbur had never seen a horse in person. He knew his neighbor had one, so many stories told over the phone of how big it was but stories didn't do the things justice. It was enough to make his jaw drop.
The beast outside was ginormous. A deep brown in color with either snow stained hooves or the purest white fluffy feet. A stripe down its nose and blond mane tied up in a plethora of braids and ribbons.
It sported a shiny blue coat with golden harness. Keeping it protected from the cold as well as attaching it to...well, that was not exactly a sleigh. No instead it was the craziest thing he's ever seen.
A sports car...on skis?
...the hot chocolate must've gone bad, this was the only explanation.
And even stranger yet was when the hand out the driver's side window pulled on the reins to make the beast stop and out stepped the strangest looking person he's ever seen. Long pink hair as fancily braided as the horse's and a thick red and white fur lined coat that gave the guy the appearance of a king.
The man stepped out, reached back into his car and pulled out a megaphone. Testing it with that obnoxiously blaring beep before raising it to his mouth.
"WILBEE WATSON YOUR UBER HAS ARRIVED."
Wilbur dropped his mug.
Wilbee looked nothing like he imagined.
Techno had figured since Phil had blond hair and blue eyes and Tommy was his spitting image of course there had to be more clones. He's not expecting the man who toppled out of the nearby house to look like some homeless kid.
Brown curly hair he was hastily tucking under a beanie that looked recently made by someone who was really bored. Winter coat thin and long perfect for an emo song writer.
He took one step in the snow and Techno saw the instant his socks got soaked.
Heh.
"Wilbee Watson?" He asked once the guy got close.
"Wilbur actually, uh...what the fuck is this?"
"Get in the car, I'll explain."
"Is this a kidnapping?"
"Bruh, I don't see any kids and I'm not getting any sleep. Get in the car." Wilbur didn't have to be told twice. Walking around Carl in a wide berth to get to the passenger side and quickly emptying his shoes out before taking his seat.
Techno climbed back in, tossing the megaphone in the backseat and grabbing the blanket instead. Throwing it over the guy since he had to keep the window cracked for the reins.
"Seatbelt."
"...seriously?"
"I don't know if a cop will pull us over, I'm not taking the chance."
Wilbur listened at least and buckled in.
Techno flicked Carl forward and the car slowly started to descend back into the already made path to get here. Once they were on their way however, he leaned forward for the glove department and wrenched out the letter.
Handing it over with a grunt.
Wilbur made a face but accepted it, snorting a laugh at the giant declaration of devotion on the front. When he read the actual letter however, his expression melted into love and tenderness.
Gross.
"...awww Tommy..." He muttered. "...his spelling is not getting any better. Jesus Phil, why do you even bother sending him to school? Did he write his E's backwards?" He tilted the paper upside down. "He fucking did!"
He folded the letter back up and stuck it back in the envelope as if it was important even if the mission was halfway complete. "So...you stole a letter to Satan from my brother and decided to grant his wish?"
Wilbur grinned. "Nice to meet you, Mr.Satan. I loved you in the Bible."
Techno rolled his eyes. "I didn't steal it. I found it in my barn." He huffed. "...and maybe I owe Phil one, I don't know. He's given me enough pot pies and firewood to warrant one free ride for his son."
"What? Wait! Are you our neighbor?!"
"Yep." Techno deadpanned, reflexively putting his hands on the steering wheel to avoid the awkwardness of a handshake. "And you're a guy I literally never heard of until today."
"I've been at college!"
"And your dad never mentioned you. Once."
"Ouch." Wilbur muttered, leaning one arm on the door and looking uselessly out the window. "So you talk to him often?"
...well, no.
Techno wasn't about to admit that however and look like an idiot. Merely grunting a sound that didn't mean yes or no. He'll keep Wilbur guessing.
"Well he was probably busy." Oh good, the guy bought his lies. "He works 2 jobs and has Tommy. Tommy is like three jobs in one."
One time Techno went out to get his mail and saw Tommy facedown in a mud puddle on the front lawn. He didn't want to be accused of murder so he pretended not to see it.
"Yeah I gathered as much."
"...so did you seriously duct tape skis to your car?"
"...maybe." Wilbur gave him a look. "Where the hell was I supposed to get a sleigh on short notice?!"
"You have a harness but no sleigh?! And...and you have like 20 skis?!"
"I give you a free ride home and you spend the entire time judging me. Bruh. Do you see me interrogating you about your purchases? Heh?!"
"Why do you even have a horse?!"
"You leave Carl out of this!"
"THAT THING IS NAMED CARL?!"
"Come on mate, it's bedtime." Phil reached forward, putting both hands on the boy's shoulders. Gently tugging him away from the window where he was watching the snow outside.
Tommy let out a long drawn out whine. Digging his fingers into the back of the chair he was kneeling on. "Daaaaaad! I can't go to bed yet!"
"Why not?"
"I'm waiting for Wilbur!"
Phil sighed, hand coming up to rub at his face. "Toms, we talked about this. Wil's going to try and make it once the storm dies down but he needs to stay where it's safe. You wouldn't want him to get hurt would you?"
He paused.
"Don't answer that."
Tommy huffed and placed both hands on the chilled glass. Leaving perfectly identical smudges of who knows what that he was playing with. "Well that's where you're wrong."
"Oh really?" Phil crossed his arms over his chest. "Do explain."
"I asked Satan to bring Wilbur home!" His youngest said proudly, holding his head up high with his chest puffed out.
Phil took a moment to process those words.
"...do you mean Santa?"
"Why would I ask Santa? He only brings presents and only if you're good and you told me I was-" The kid tried to say it exactly like his father did, badly mimicking an accent he already had to begin with, "a meeenice to so-simtry!"
He then held out both hands. "So even if I asked him he wouldn't do it!"
Phil loved his son, he really did, but it was moments like these that he debated his entire lifetime of choices. From the day he first decided to ask Kristin out to the moment he said 'we should have another kid' like an idiot.
He was adorable but they were going to get hunted down by a church if Tommy was actually putting letters to satan in the mailbox.
"Uh-huh and how did you ask Satan?"
"I wrote him a letter!"
No wonder the mailman sent Phil the dirtiest looks anytime their eyes met.
"Jesus kid you'll be the death of me."
Tommy tilted his head back. "Is Santa going to be mad about that too?" Phil chuckled, shaking his head and leaning forward to scoop the kid up into his arms.
"You'll get toys this year, gremlin, I promise."
"How do you know?!"
"Santa tells dads ahead of time so we know how big of a tree we need."
Tommy nodded like that made sense, allowing himself to be taken to his room. Resting his head on the man's shoulder until he was plopped down in his bed. Quickly scrambling to grab his stuffed spider toy.
Phil sat on the edge of his bed, helping him get under the covers and settled in. Soon joined by the fluffy white beast named L'dog. He took up more space than Tommy on the bed but was also quicker to get to sleep.
He pet the dog between the ears before he moved to turn on the nightlight.
"Dad!"
He paused in the doorway.
"How long does it take letters to get to Hell?"
Phil could feel a headache coming on.
He flipped the switch for the room lights. "I dunno Toms. The roads are probably busy there. Maybe we can google it in the morning. Now go the fuck to bed you little shit, I still have to work in the morning."
Tommy laughed and rolled over, snuggling into his toy as Phil shut the door most of the way.
The man sighed and made his way down the hall.
"I'm going to go burn that letter."
Tommy had almost fallen asleep. He was trying, honestly! He knew that sleeping made Santa show up faster so the same logic could be applied to Satan as well. He had shut his eyes as tight as he could and waited.
But when he opened them again the clock on his wall had barely moved.
Which made him roll over and kick off his blankets in frustration. Flailing his arms and legs until L'dog let out a growl to make him stop.
He decided that he wasn't going to sit around and wait then. Pushing off of his bed and onto the floor. Hopping from one foot to another as he touched the cold carpet and ran the rest of the way to his desk by the window.
Climbing into the chair and eventually on the table to peer outside just like he had been doing downstairs. L'dog soon jumped up with him, yawning as if he was obligated to be there.
"Do you see Satan?" Tommy whispered, loud enough to make L'dog's ears fall back.
He couldn't see anything really. Just a lot of white and the corner of Techno's house and yard. He squinted out at the barn, trying to see if he could see Carl out there. He loved Carl and he told dad that Santa should bring him a horse too.
Dad had looked very tired when he said that.
Maybe because there wasn't a tree big enough to put a horse under.
He kept looking for a bit longer before he pouted. Turning his body to face L'dog who had laid down on the desk. Drawing his knees up to wrap his arms around them. "This is stupid, Wilby said he'd be here. He promised!"
"He said we were going to go out ice skating too! He can't go back on his promise! I'll...I'll bite him if he does!" He flashed his teeth, a big gap in the front where he recently lost a tooth. L'dog yawned again and showed off a far more impressive set. "Yeah you can help!"
Suddenly however, his dog perked up. Head snapping to the window and ears swiveling a few times as if he heard something. Tommy quickly turned his attention back and gasped at what he saw.
"DAD!" He screamed, jumping off the desk and L'dog tore out of the room with him barking like mad. "DAD, DAD, HE'S HERE!"
He ran down the hall and towards the stairs, careful to take them slower because that's how he lost that tooth. Jumping off the last step and laughing as his father came rushing out of the kitchen alarmed.
"What?! What's going on?! Did you eat something again?! SPIT IT OUT!"
"SATAN'S HERE!" Tommy yelled, running to the front door. Reaching for the door handle and tugging on it with both hands. "I saw him! He's here!"
He could hear his father's exasperated sigh but he didn't care. He tugged with all of his might and dug his heels in as L'dog continued to race around and bark. "I saw his sleigh! It was red and black and had a big demon pulling it!"
"Tommy, Satan doesn't drive a sleigh..."
"I SAW IT! OPEN UP THE DOOR, HE'S HERE!"
Phil sighed heavily, reaching over him to unlock the door. "Look I'm going to let you look outside but once you see nothing, you're going right back to bed and sleeping!" He took the handle from Tommy and pulled open the door.
Just to stop dead in his tracks.
Because Wilbur was coming up the porch shivering.
"I TOLD YOU!" Tommy screamed, throwing both of his hands in the air. "WILBY!!!"
"TOMMY!" Wilbur yelled back with just as much enthusiasm, wrenching open the screen door to immediately scoop up his brother. Laughing as he spun around in a circle.
"What the fuck."
"Dad!" Wilbur greeted him too, offering one arm to hug him. Even as the man just stood there stunned. "Fuck let's shut the door, I'm going to freeze to death." He locked it behind him and quickly made his way over to the fireplace with Tommy still in his arms.
Tommy was practically strangling him with his hug. "I told dad! I told him! I asked for you! Satan helped!"
Wilbur grinned wide. "Yeah! He did!" He sat Tommy down on the couch, sitting with him. "Thanks for that, Toms. I really didn't want to miss christmas with you two."
"I'm going to ask Satan for a horse next!"
Techno doesn't leave the house again until the storm ends. Well he does a few times but it's just a straight shot back to his barn and then back inside. He hasn't bothered to take the skis off his car yet.
He reasons that he might need them again.
Destiny was a fickle bitch.
But he doesn't leave and it doesn't come knocking and soon the winds die down enough to just leave behind enough snow to bury a few bodies in. Finding himself staring out his window and dreading the idea of shoveling.
It's a quiet wonderland however, arguably peaceful. He almost misses Tommy's screams of excitement as he ran around in circles chasing nothing but his imagination.
Thoughts like these are what doom him in. His accursed heart luring the family next door like the smell of fear with a wild bear. He is about to settle down with a cup of instant ramen when there's a sudden frantic knocking at his door.
When he opens it, he spies the very man he was almost hoping to never see again. Too long of a car ride spent arguing over literature to endear Wilbur to him.
Even worse is the greeting that leaves the man's lips.
"Merry Christmas, Satan!"
"...please tell me that nickname isn't sticking around."
Wilbur cackles, uncaring of his reputation. Inviting himself in two steps but still lingering enough in the doorway to not close it. "Get your shoes and coat, you're coming over for dinner."
"Heh?!"
"Dad made shepherd's pie."
"I didn't hear an invitation, Wilbee, I heard a demand."
"That's right bitch, you're coming over whether you like it or not." Wilbur just grinned, hands tucked in his stupidly thin coat's pockets. "And the next year and the year after that. Until you move away."
Techno wonders how fast he could sell this home.
He's jarred out of his thoughts a moment later however when an envelope taps his face in a far gentler manner than has ever happened before. A big familiar 'TO SATAN' written across the front.
"And I also thought I'd hand deliver this one, since Tommy is now convinced that I know Satan personally."
"Bruh."
"Don't worry, don't worry. I helped him write this one. No other family members to ride off into the sunset to claim just a big ole' sappy thank you for bringing him his favorite brother-"
Techno was pretty sure there was no competition.
"-and maybe a request for a horse."
He took the letter, staring at it. A hint of a smile twitching on his features as he noticed the crudely drawn Carl-like shape pulling a very demonic looking sleigh. He assumes that was an attempt at his car.
He let out a sigh.
"...I'll get my coat."
What a strange way to meet your neighbors.