Actions

Work Header

If thought is life and strength and breath

Summary:

The first thing you do when you finally get to the surface is lie.

(Happy Mother's Day)

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

The first thing you do when you finally get to the surface is lie.

It's simple enough, Toriel asks what you’ll do now, her eyes resigned in a way that pulls and twists something in you.

You tell her you have places to be before you can think of another answer (before you can tell her the truth or cry and ask her to make things better.) That’s not her responsibility and even if she was nice enough to try, it would be bad, burning of you to ask.

You have nothing to offer someone like her, someone as good, warm and soft, kind. (Angry, biter, with the weight of something so old).

But when she walks away and you realize that this could be the end, it only takes a choked wheeze for her to turn back to you. You manage to sign another lie, asking for one night because, where you have to be is far away and could you stay with her for just one night, you’re sorry.

She smiles and offers any help she can. You take her warm paw-like hand and wish you knew what to do.

----

Believe it or not, monsters as a whole have bigger problems than you do right now, and you’re relieved that you can help. Thankful that they don’t question it when you say that you’re staying with Toriel for a night ‘Gone in the morning, Mom - MS. TORIEL offered to help.’

And you do help! You help anyone who needs it as they all come to the surface to get a look, before going back down to help prepare for the move and wait on word from their king. When Alphys figures out how to get access to the human internet and hacks the president's email, you know it helps the video message they send to have a human child smiling and signing that the monsters mean no harm, they’ve helped you so much.

And that’s, ok. As long as you’re helping and being useful you can stay! You don’t have to go if you’re not being a bother, and you really don’t feel like one around your friends. Even if they’re probably just being nice. Even if they don’t know all you’ve done and seen in the underground.

You can’t actually stay.

You help with video negotiations and talks, lying to human leaders when they demand to know where your parents are. ‘I got lost, the nice monsters are taking me home in the morning, it’s too late to go now.’ Until it’s dark and you’re having trouble keeping your eyes open.

You tell your friends goodnight and Toriel takes your hand and leads you back underground, not to her old room in the palace, but to the hotel. She apologizes for the single large bed and buys you both dinner and you’re so grateful that you don’t know what to say. You fall asleep next to her trying to resist the urge to cling as you fall asleep.

You wake up in the middle of the night wondering if you tried crawling in bed with Mom, if she'll be annoyed. There are arms around you, heavy and fuzzy instead of smooth and bony and you're brought slowly back to reality. You bury your face in them and cry as quietly as you can as you cling to her and let her warmth relax you until you’re dreaming.

----

You wake up confused, Toriel’s gone and you feel an aching rush of rush of panic as you choke and pat down the space where she was.

“My child, what is wrong?” And she's here again, warm arms are scooping you out of the covers as Toriel sits and rocks you. You wheeze and cling to her, disoriented and wildly unsure of what's wrong until a sob catches in your throat and words start rasping and stuttering their way our of your mouth. “Mom, Mom I’m sorry, I’ll be g-good and I’m really really - ” you’re choking on snot and you hate making sound so you stop trying and just cry as she rocks you. She’s so warm and soft and nice, and she smells like cinnamon and soil.

Toriel’s been so so good to you and you want to stay here hugging her and you’re, you’re not going to let go until she tells you to, you’re DETERMINED to cling.

“My child, it is ok, tell me what is wrong, do you, do you miss your human parents?”

You’re sniffling and trying to stop crying, to put on a neutral face and calm down, but it’s not working and you do miss your human mom so much but - “S-she never came back, she said she would, but she was so m-mad!" You’re almost yelling now and you know you shouldn’t be so loud. “And I tried to wait, I promise I tried. And I know she left because I screwed up, but I was angry too and I thought -” and you’re gasping and you know it was selfish what you did. “The bus stop was right next to the mountain where kids disappear, and she d-didn’t, she didn’t come back so she wanted me to disappear. I thought, she's regret it, if I-I-" If you died, if they found your body someday she'd feel so bad and finally realize that sometimes the things she does are Not Ok, and she'd be a better person and you wouldn't have to worry about it anymore from where you were. "So I climbed the mountain and disappeared but now I don’t want to go back and I don’t know where she is, and I’m sorry!” Your voice breaks and falters, but Toriel doesn't interrupt during the halting pauses until it peters out for good and you're just crying again.

She's quiet, just rocking and shushing you. When she does speak her voice is husky and weirdly clogged “You did nothing wrong my child. We will figure something out, I promise you.”

----

Eventually you cry yourself out and you both get up from cuddling on the bed. You’re emotionally drained in a way that actually makes you feel a bit better than you have been, like you've been emptied out.

Toriel may not be hugging you anymore but she seems to want to stay in constant contact. Kissing the top of your head and putting her big hand there to ruffle your hair as she bustles around making waffles (you don’t question where she got the ingredients to make waffles or why the hotel room has a stove). In a matter of minutes you both have food and she’s holding your hand as you both do the silly thing of trying to eat very sticky stuff one handed. It ends up a mess with syrup stuck in her fur and smeared all over your face. You’re both snorfling and giggling by the end of breakfast. It feels nice, and safe.

You really haven't known Toriel that long but you keep calling her Mom. She tells you she doesn't mind with a crinkle around her eyes that means it’s true. You think you might really really love her.

After you’re both cleaned up she asks you to help her text Sans. She's still giggling even as you determinedly ignore the first things she asks you to type.

--
*Hi Sans! You're cute.
*As cute as a snail!
--
sans: *. . . uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
--
*My child wgy!
*,,,sodddkk
*Got the phone back! And she thinks you are so cute!!!
*Mom's covering her face and laughing, don't worry though. *She's blushing too.
--
*SANS SEEMS TO HAVE FALLEN DOWN AND HAS NOT GOTTEN UP YET!!! DO NOT FEAR THOUGH, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE BEEN READING THESE MESSAGES TO HIM.
*HE SAYS: “no papyrus, i don't have a crush on the beautiful fluffy punmaster behind the door, go away bro.”
*I TYPED IT IN LOWER CASE SO YOU COULD READ IT IN HIS VOICE.
*THE QUEEN HAS FUR ON HER FACE, HOW CAN YOU TELL THAT SHE IS BLUSHING???
--
*She's . . . smoldering? How does fire magic even work, that's the equivalent of a blush right?
*She's also helping me spell and isn't denying anything. *waggles eyebrows*
*Oh! But actually she wanted to ask Sans if he could come over, she wants to talk to him about something??? --_-- *suspicion grows*
*She says “No my child I am not going to smooch him where do you even get this stuff.” but I think that's a liiieeeeeee
--
*HE SAYS HE WILL COME!
*YOU TWO ARE STAYING AT METTATON'S HOTEL RIGHT???
*yeah so i’m taking my phone back. what room? i'll be down in a minute.
--

Toriel has already asked you if it would be ok to tell Sans what you told her, she explained that it would make her feel better to talk to him to try and figure out what to do since he’s the only adult she really knows other than Asgore. You agree to these terms as long as you’re there for the talk AND she wears the ribbon you found in the ruins. (Papyrus said that flirting required special clothes.)

Sans shows up at the door with a lazy double rap knock. Your mom snorts to herself as she responds with an innocent sounding “Who is there?”

“adore.”

“Adore who??”

“adore is between us, open up” She does to reveal a rumpled looking skeleton. There are twigs stuck in the fuz of his hood and you wonder if he slept outside. “sup tori, kid.” He nods to you and you grin and wink with finger pistols at him, he’s totally got this.

Toriel places a hand on your shoulder and leans forward to hug him with the other arm “Hello my friend, come in.”

He does, smile as fixed as ever. You sit down next to him when he sits on the edge of the hotel bed and pet his hand encouragingly. “sooo, what’s up?”

Toriel fidgets with her pawpads and sits down on the other side of him. “I am sorry if this is inappropriate I suppose you do not, I mean, you have done me enough favors Sans. I am sorry to ask another of you, but I wanted you here to request your council.”

Sans has the smile of someone’s who’s about to be pushed off a bridge. Sweat beads on his forehead. “well i’d hate to disappoint, what’s up?”

Toriel looks to you and you turn to him and sign ‘I’m not sure if my human mom will take me back, I’m sorry.’

Sans blinks, surprised. Toriel growls, a low throaty noise that startles you. “Or to be more precise, I would rather remarry Asgore than let a guardian who would abandon a child on a mountain as some sort of perverse punishment regain custody of any child. And most certainly not the savior of monsterkind.” You look up at her, feeling your face warm. “However. I am unsure of how human law in regards to this sort of thing works, and am equally unsure if keeping Frisk would be seen as some sort of unlawful or aggressive act by the humans.”

You wince, you are pretty sure this is too much trouble. You decide to offer a suggestion. ‘Maybe if she was payed to keep me it would be ok? I mean if I accept the ambassador job I might get paid and then I’d be less trouble.’

Sans is still smiling but his eye lights have gotten dim and you look down. “nah kid, you’re what? nine? nine year olds don’t need to be paying rent.” he looks to Toriel “i think you’re worrying too much about the humans, i mean we’ve talked to them and they don’t want war or anything either right?” She nods “k. well i think you have to remember that we’re not suddenly completely part of their legal system just because we’re on the surface and no one wants war. we have our own citizenship and laws. frisk is a hero to monsters, and you’re still technically the queen. if both of you’re saying frisk doesn't want to leave then frisk isn’t going to leave if monsters have anything to say about it.”

You feel shocked and a bit embarrassed but as your Mom is looking at Sans, the slump to her shoulders seems to fall away and her eyes take on a spark of what you are experienced enough to recognize as Determination. “Let us make an attack plan then.” Smiling she stands up. “After another round of waffles though, You, my dear, are looking a bit bony”

You and Sans both laugh and you’re pretty sure from the look on his face that he loves her just as much as you do.

----

The attack plan ends up being as simple as informing Asgore and the public of what is happening and a paragraph long speech written by Toriel, with Sans lazy suggestions and your nervous acceptance. Sans makes the video and sends it over to Alphys with the request that she send it to the necessary officials.

“Greetings, humans. My name is Toriel, queen of the underground. I am here to inform you that, when taking into account some facts that have been recently been brought to light, Primarily the abandonment and neglect of the human child Frisk Mcloven by their human mother. We as a collective have decided to grant them monster citizenship and offer them a home here. Any attempt to remove Frisk from their home will be considered an act of war. Thank you for your time and I hope you have a good evening.”

----

There’s kicking and screaming from the humans, but it mostly dies down when it’s discovered that you are not technically a U.S. citizen in the first place and your mother never steps forward to claim you. Which is something that makes you, incredibly sad and incredibly relieved. Feelings you don't really have time to focus on surrounded by people you love.

There is so much to help with, the move to the surface is stalled for weeks as negotiations take place with the humans. There’s moving and planning and accommodating all the different kind of monsters who need to move. It’s a good thing Asgore stopped Mom from firing Alphys because she’s working every day on special accommodations and accessibility for different types of monsters.

Plans to start moving into human populated areas and the construction of new towns shoots off. As nice as Mt. Ebott is, it is in no way big enough for the near 12 million monsters spread across the underground. You’re pretty sure the full move will take years.

Surprisingly though, you aren't working every day. Toriel insists that both of you take weekends off, and if she’s not there during the work days helping you, one of your friends is. She gets a temporary apartment in New Home and you always eat together in the mornings and the evenings. She lets you sleep in her bed when you want the comfort of her warmth.

Sometimes you miss your human Mom like a piece has been taken out of you. Sometimes you wish you could have been good enough for her.

Toriel stays near you on days like that.

----

Eventually things start to settle down. People are hired and elected to delegate the work and build a true monster embassy that helps deal with all the problems of integrating with humans and building settlements.

Before you know it you and your mom are packing up to move to the surface together.

To your delight you end up teaming up with Sans and Papyrus to find a place. To everyone’s delight you find a house big enough for all of you, and down the street from where Alphys and Undyne live. It’s in an area in the suburbs of the nearest human city that has started to have an influx of monster residents.

You’re going to be enrolled in your mom’s new school when it gets going next semester, and your ambassador duties have been cut down to mostly being a public icon. (until you get older if you decide that’s what you want to do with your life, both Toriel and Asgore inform you.)

Slowly you fill your room with soft things and bright colors. Until it becomes safe enough in your head that you find yourself actually sleeping in it half the time.

Eventually you think, that maybe, things are going to be ok.

Notes:

Title from "The Fly by Cosmo Sheldrake" , which feels like a very Frisk song.

The lovely Ingo edited this for me!

Series this work belongs to: