Chapter Text
It's the incessant pounding in my head that drags me slowly from the fond clutches of sleep.
How irritating...
Pounding is not an adequate enough description, in the same way the word 'Big' should no longer be linked in any way, shape, or form to the word 'Mac'.
Have you seen the size of the buns now? Big? In what universe would that unimpressive offering be considered big? What a ridiculous load of crap. I think I'll be just fine grilling my own burger from now on, thank you very much.
Agonizing pain is much more appropriate. I'm by no means a migraine connoisseur, but trust me, I know my headaches. I've experienced many unpleasant and uncomfortable things in my lifetime, but this puts everything else previous to shame.
Ever tried to painstakingly scrape your way through a solid wall of bone using only a serrated grapefruit spoon? Probably not. Assuming you could even track one of those bad boys down to attempt it, because they're considered specialty silverware now.
Who would've thought? Did the bitter beauty of my favorite fruit become obsolete with the invention of the Cutie?
I'm not okay with that. Stupid conveniently easy peel outsides...
So yes, My brain is the tasty grapefruit in this delicious but also disturbingly gross visual scenario. The damn grumpy thing feels like it's trying to abandon ship through that spoony porthole in the back of my skull.
I don't actually have a hole back there, right?
No way, that's crazy...
But... maybe I should check?
Eyelids squeezed tight to muzzle and protect the Thunder Mountain rollercoaster mayhem happening with every tiny movement, I groggily raise my hands to clutch my throbbing head. The too heavy weight and rattling clink that accompanies the motion works better at clearing the lingering brain fog than any quad-shot espresso.
Snapping completely awake, my body is instantly on high alert. My second-ago headache woes are long forgotten as my eyes dart around in growing alarm.
Okay. Maybe I exaggerated slightly with the whole spoon/grapefruit agonizing pain bit.
There's no light source that I can tell which leaves my surroundings in heavy shadow, creepy unfamiliar shapes that I can barely see. I squint but it's useless. Blindly, I search around with my hands, ignoring that ominous clinking slither.
The floor is a mismatch of stone shapes, not the commonly manufactured squares or rectangles from Home Depot. Maybe recycled cobblestones? I don't know, who cares? They're not even laid very professionally considering the uneven path my fingers are making across the surface. Something that feels like a metal ring is bolted into the stone with some kind of large spike a couple feet away. There's a cold link of heavy chain looped and threaded through it.
That chain is attached to metal manacles around my wrists.
Yeah. I already realized the part about the cuffs but I'm trying not to panic becau—
WHY AM I CHAINED TO THE FUCKING GROUND?!?!
I scramble backwards until the chain snaps taut, gasping for breath which suddenly is unwilling to come. Unwelcome tears wet my cheeks. Crouched in a miserable huddle, I clutch my hands to my mouth, trying to stifle the horror threatening to spill from between my lips. I can’t tell if I want to scream at the top of my lungs or vomit, fear worming its way in a rush through my veins like a hungry disease.
My knees crumble beneath me.
Every single move I make is followed by another clink, quiet, yet somehow it echoes through the silence like a gunshot.
Clink. Clink. Clink.
The sound is like the beating of the heart in that old Poe story. With my own heart racing to join and overthrow my brain on the citrus silverware escape plan, I tug on the chains. And then I tug again hard. The rough metal chafes against my bare skin, every action is a new and improved slice of awful.
I try again anyway. And again.
Making absolutely zero progress, I start to REALLY freak out. The 'I'm trapped and the Bad Guy is coming to skin me alive and make an ugly bodysuit any minute' kind of serious panic. Breathing hard and fast, I keep pulling and jerking until perspiration is dripping in my eyes and pouring down my back. Just as I'm drawing in a breath to make the usually useless and potentially dangerous call for help, I catch a glint of green in my palm.
What in the fucknu—
It starts to glow, as if my sudden awareness of it triggered something. Streaks of green lightening crackle all around me and in that quick flash of light I see blank stone walls and a heavily barred door.
Before I can process anything or come up with a plan, a whirlwind of searing, white hot agony flares up my arm.
Mother bleeping goat hoarding bootlickers!
Now I'm full on regretting any complaints about my head earlier. That was nothing compared to this.
This is the kind of pain that makes you wish for death.
I scream.
I don't know if I'm more scared or relieved that no one comes rushing. Then, I have nothing left in me to care either way. The pain is all-consuming for minutes or possibly an eternity; I have no perception of time.
My screams echo in the darkness.
They go on and on, eventually choked off by bile as I vomit violently, every muscle in my body contracting painfully as I heave until the world goes blessedly dark.